by Linda Conrad
“But our brother Darin’s people have retrieved interesting tidbits from the internet,” Shakir continued with a smug smile. “According to the Net, the Taj agents were supposed to drive that truck with the delivery system all the way to Washington D.C. They’d plotted to detonate the nuclear device either beside the Capitol or the Pentagon. Planned on making a big splash. And force the U.S. imperialist machine to sit up and take notice.”
Tarik was amazed. “After all this secrecy, the Taj themselves planned to publicize their terrorist dealings to the world?”
“In a big way.”
Tarik began to pace the tiny conference room where they’d been waiting for hours. “Do we know how they managed to get Ed Langdon in on the deal?”
“Big payoffs, would be my bet. That Russian in Brazil, Eltsin, used to be connected to the Russian mafia. He’d probably worked with Langdon years ago when he was a double agent.”
“Langdon was a real piece of work. He planned on killing his partners along with Jass and then telling the Task Force they’d killed each other.”
“Scumbag,” his brother retorted.
“I want to see Jass,” Tarik said between gritted teeth. “Before she leaves. What do I have to do to convince—?”
“Sorry, Kadir.” General Wainwright appeared at the door. “She’s flying to D.C. within the hour. The Task Force will be going through a major overhaul over the next few months. The idea that two of our own were double agents and one of them endangered an entire mission has shaken everyone.”
The general came all the way into the room and closed the door behind him. “I don’t suppose I could talk you into coming back as a consultant to help us sort through the intel?”
“No, sir. I’m sure my family still needs me. I doubt the Taj Zabbar are going to be any happier with the Kadir family now that their grandiose terror plot has been ruined.”
The general nodded. “Only temporarily ruined, would be my guess. I understand. But if you can find a way to consult for both of us, the Kadirs and the U.S. government, the offer remains open.”
“I appreciate that, sir.”
“In the meantime,” the general went on. “The President has asked to see you and your brother. I think he wants to thank you for being on our side.”
“Yes, sir. Now?” Tarik asked.
“Tomorrow morning. We’ll be taking a military flight back to Andrews at 8 a.m. However, I’m sorry you won’t be able to enjoy any of the south Florida activities this evening, gentlemen. The President has granted you diplomatic immunity, but there’s still a lot of questions we will be answering for the sheriff and Homeland Security tonight.”
Tarik wasn’t going to leave it at that. “Yes, sir. But…I need to see Jass before she leaves. Can you arrange it?”
“She hasn’t been asking to see you, son. I’m sorry…”
“A couple of moments is all I need. It’s a matter of life and death.”
It was. His life. He would die if he didn’t get a chance to talk to her before she disappeared into her world of secret agents.
The general actually smiled. “All right. It wouldn’t be my fault if we just happened to be leaving the office to grab a bite of dinner at the same time as they were leaving for the airport, would it?” He checked his watch. “I’ll speak to the sheriff about sending a deputy with us for security. Be in the parking lot in ten minutes.”
Tarik nearly saluted the general as he smartly spun around and left.
Rubbing suddenly sweaty palms against his thighs, Tarik turned to his big brother. “What can I say to her in only a few minutes in a public parking lot?”
Shakir shrugged. “Say what you feel. I’ve found that’s the only thing that works well with the woman you love.”
Jass would give up a day of her life for a shower. In fact, she would gladly give up this day. It had so far been the absolute worst.
Except, of course, for the few minutes she’d spent alone with Tarik this morning in their motel room. That was something she would never give away. The memories were going to have to hold her for the rest of her life.
“Wait here,” her CIA companion and guard told her as they entered the late-afternoon heat of the open parking lot. “I’ll bring the SUV around.”
As the young man sprinted off, she stood, tapping her toe against the searing asphalt and thinking about Tarik. She hadn’t said goodbye. But then that was probably for the best.
What they’d done—what they’d been to each other on this mission—it was special. But it was over. She couldn’t afford to look back.
Closing her eyes, she let the dull ache of never seeing him again wash over her. More pain.
She had enough pain on her plate already. That’s why years ago, when her father went away and left her with a mother who’d never loved anyone but herself, Jass had erected those walls around her emotions. To keep the pain and loneliness at bay. Tarik had climbed those walls and she wished to hell that she’d kept him out. Letting Tarik stay in her world for any longer now would only open her up to more heartbreak than she thought she could withstand.
“Jass! Wait up.”
Turning to the familiar voice, she bit down on her lip to keep from crying out his name. Oh Lord, the man was sinfully gorgeous.
A single tear threatened to leak from the corner of her eye but she willed it back. “I’m…leaving, Tarik. There’s no time to—” She bit her tongue. “Well, to say goodbye.”
He put his hands on her upper arms, holding her firmly but gently. “Are you okay?” He looked at her as though she were the most precious jewel in a crown full of expensive diamonds.
“I will be.” She stood straighter and eased out of his grip. “General Wainwright has arranged for me to spend a little time in psych eval at Walter Reed, starting tonight. It’ll be like a nice short vacation before the real work of reorganizing the Task Force begins.”
“Good. That’s good. They’ll help you.” Tarik reached out a hand. But when she stepped away, he dropped it back to his side.
“Jass, I want to see you again. There’re things we…” He looked around at the busy parking lot. “We need to talk. I’m flying to D.C. in the morning to see the President. But if you’ll be in the hospital for a few days, I’ll wait.”
She began shaking her head. Unable to say what needed to be said. Unable to cut him out of her life forever when that was exactly her best course of action.
“Don’t do this.” His voice tensed, strained. “You know we’re not done, damn it. Not by a long shot.”
A big, black SUV pulled up alongside her, the driver leaving its motor rumbling in neutral. Relieved to have an escape route, she opened the passenger door.
“This is for the best, Tarik. We come from different places. There’s nothing I can add to your life. Forget me. Forget us. Go save your family and the world.”
Tears were threatening to spill over. But she refused. She turned her back on the only man left on earth who mattered to her at all and climbed into the SUV.
“Jass…” Tarik stood there with his hands fisted at his sides and the saddest expression on his face.
She would never forget the way he was looking at her. Not in a million years.
“Goodbye, Tarik. Take good care of yourself.”
Slamming the door, Jass held tightly to the handle because otherwise she might fly off into oblivion. She held on and kept swallowing hard as the SUV pulled out of the lot.
Running away. Yes, it was true. She was scared and running as fast as she could from a relationship that was bound to cause her more pain than her battered heart would ever be able to withstand.
Four weeks. Tarik’s need to see Jass, to be with her, grew ever more insistent as the days dragged on.
He stood, staring out the window of his hotel room suite at the sun setting over the Potomac. Cherry blossoms blew in the spring breezes, and at times the city looked so romantic it made his heart ache with loneliness.
But he wasn’t alone. Var
ious members of his family had arrived in D.C. over the weeks, hoping to convince him to give up his quest and come back with them. No chance.
This was crazy. How could the one person he’d fallen for hard be the one person who refused to even talk to him?
It must be some kind of perverted justice. Retribution for a life spent playing games and hiding behind hundreds of different faces.
But Tarik rejected what everyone else thought was his fate. Jass had sent him a message the other day explaining that they had nothing left to say to each other. He didn’t agree. He had a lot left to say. And wanted a lifetime to say it.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go out to dinner with us, Tarik?” Rylie, one of his new sisters-in-laws, appeared in the doorway of the suite’s second bedroom.
She and Darin were here in Washington ostensibly to take a second honeymoon. Tarik knew the real reason why they’d come. The same reason the rest of his family had shown up at various times over the last month.
“No. But, thanks.”
“You can’t sit around forever and mourn a relationship that didn’t get off the ground.” Rylie came closer and spoke softly. “I know it’s hard for you. You’ve never been turned down before. But sometimes no just means no. That’s when you need to accept things the way they are and go on with your life.”
He exhaled sharply but said nothing.
“Come back to the Mediterranean with us.” She laid a gentle hand on his arm. “Your family still needs you, bubba. We love you and want you with us.”
Swallowing down the threatening tears, Tarik forced a smile at his sister-in-law and her Texas twang. “Yeah, the Task Force says they need me, too. But I can’t work. I can’t do anything yet. I have to talk to her, Rylie. There has to be a way.”
But neither the Task Force nor the CIA would give him Jass’s phone number or address. He’d sent message after message. Knowing full well nothing would work as well as it would if he could take her in his arms and tell her in person.
“There could be a way.” Darin came out of the bedroom already dressed in his expensive designer suit. “Ambush might be a little extreme, but I trust she wouldn’t call the cops on you if you simply showed up at her apartment.”
Rylie didn’t look happy with her husband, but she stepped back and folded her arms over her chest, staying silent for the moment.
“I can’t locate her address or, believe me, I would try.”
Darin waved his arm in the air as he shot his cuffs. “Nonsense. Call Karim. If anyone can find her, he can.”
“Darin!” Rylie scowled at her husband. “Don’t tell your brother to do something like that. The CIA would be furious with Tarik if he had Karim hack into their system. Not to mention how unhappy Jasmine O’Reilly will be if he simply shows up at her place.”
Darin shrugged. “It’s his life, sweetheart. Let him try.”
Tired and cranky, Jass climbed into her sweats and opened all the windows in her apartment to let the brisk nighttime breeze cool off her overheated brow. Another day from hell was finally behind her.
All she wanted was to do now was turn the TV on to some thoughtless channel and vegetate on the couch while she contemplated her future. She refused to spend any more time with the psychologists. Enough was enough.
The one she’d seen today actually had the nerve to tell her she would have to go through all the stages of grief in order to heal. The same as if a loved one had died. The fool doctor said learning about Ed had been a kind of death of innocence and she needed to grieve.
Bull. What she needed was a lot less new-age crap.
The fact was, she’d turned in her resignation from the Task Force to General Wainwright last week and was now free to do as she pleased. And what would please her was to be left alone to think.
The general had said, “But we need you on our side.”
Not anymore they didn’t. Every man in the Task Force knew the story of Ed’s traitorous dealings. How could she live with that on the job? How could she explain that she’d never known?
The CIA had pieced together enough facts to learn that her father was not the traitor Ed had claimed he’d been. The news was a relief of sorts. But in Jass’s mind the new information simply made her father seem incredibly dense for not recognizing what his partner had been up to.
Of course, she hadn’t seen Ed for what he really was over the last ten years either. And that was something she would have to someday settle in her own mind. But talking to a bunch of shrinks had not been helping.
The only one of them who’d made a lick of sense had said she should consider this an opportunity to begin again. To start a brand new life.
How right he was. She’d already quit her job—she had enough in savings that she didn’t need to go to work again anytime soon. She would take the time to rethink her life. Maybe she would even go back and get her law degree the way her dad always wanted.
One thing was for sure—she would be moving out of this apartment. As of tomorrow. It reminded her too much of the past. Jass even wanted to move out of D.C., but she wasn’t sure where to go.
And yes, she knew that meant she was running away again. So what? No amount of distance would erase the real problem—her memories of Tarik. He was always there, in her mind, talking to her. Consoling her. Being her friend when everyone else around her only wanted something or saw her as a job.
Changing what she did for a living and where she slept at night was not going to change how she felt about Tarik one iota. And she’d finally come to the conclusion she didn’t want it to change. Thoughts and dreams of Tarik would keep her company throughout the years.
She’d given up on the idea of ever trying love again with anyone else. Where would she find someone with the same blinding smile? Or with Tarik’s way of being in tune with her thoughts? Or with those same soft, mushy gazes whenever he looked in her direction?
She hadn’t received a message from him in the last couple of days. Good for him. She hoped he’d given up and left the area. He deserved a new start, too.
She couldn’t live with herself if she’d caused him any real hurt. Surely these messages she’d been receiving from him all stemmed from a wounded pride. He’d overcome that soon enough.
He was a special person. She didn’t think she’d ever met anyone as strong and determined as Tarik Kadir.
Or as warm and loving. Or as sexy and erotic.
Giving herself permission to have yet another crying jag, she rolled over on the couch and buried her face in the pillow. Have a good life, my love.
God, he must be seriously in love to take his life in his hands this way.
Tarik was so nervous that his whole body shook as he lowered himself to the apartment ledge under an endless star-filled sky. But it wasn’t the idea of dangling in midair again that made him shaky. It was knowing he would only get one chance with Jass.
When his feet finally hit solid surface, he balanced precariously on the narrow ledge and unbuckled his harness. He was more wired from nerves than from the flying device. Which only went to show how important Jass was to him.
He’d been afraid to try knocking on her door. Too easy for her to lock him out and send him away. And then he’d caught a break and discovered her windows were open.
No fire escape and no balcony. But hell, he couldn’t let that stop him.
Inching along the ledge, Tarik held his breath and refused to consider the dark abyss below. He tried to think of all the things he wanted to say, but his mind went blank as he set one foot inside her window.
“Hold it.” Jass’s voice was loud and strong through the darkness. “Come on inside but watch your step. This .38 has a hair trigger.”
Yeah, he would bet it did. “It’s me, Jass. Put your weapon down.”
She stepped aside and flicked on a table lamp but held the gun on him as he climbed inside. “What on earth do you think you’re doing, Kadir?”
Dressed in winter running sweats and heavy socks, s
he wasn’t wearing a speck of makeup. That amazing head full of chestnut hair was standing straight up in spikes. And those exotic hazel eyes had darkened to the deepest green and were wary as hell.
Yes indeed, her protective walls were still high and tight. He’d have a devil of a war coming in order to break them down.
“How are you doing, Jass?”
“Fine. Why are you here? You should’ve gone back to your family by now.” She was still holding the gun, but the barrel had dipped to point at his feet and she’d released her finger from the trigger.
“I need a little of your time.”
“And that means you come in through my window in the middle of the night? You’re lucky I didn’t shoot you in the ass and ask questions later.”
“Hey, and thanks for that. Grand gesture on your part considering not many bad guys could fly into your window five stories up.”
The corners of her lips tipped up at that remark and she dropped her weapon to her side. “All right. Come in and sit down. Tell me whatever it is and then go away.”
He didn’t want to leave this woman. Not ever again. Man up, bubba, as Rylie would say. Time to face love down.
“Look.” He sunk into a side chair and hoped she would sit on the couch beside him. “There’s something I didn’t say the last time we were together. That was a mistake. I…”
“The only thing I want to hear from you is that you’re leaving and starting a new life. Do what’s best for everyone, Tarik.” She averted her gaze, refusing to meet his eyes.
He’d expected a war. Still, her words hit him like a nuclear warhead.
Standing again, he tried to keep the whine out of his voice. “You don’t even want to hear me out? I thought…we cared about each other. Is that how you treat people you care about?”
She shot him a quick glance, then stared at the floor. But in that instant he’d seen longing. Regret. Hope.
He was at her side in a click. He put her gun on the table but then stayed his hands, kept them from drawing her close. “I know you’re afraid. But…”
“I’m not afraid of anything.”
Oh, his sweet love. “Right. I get it. You’re not afraid of anything but me. And of the possibilities of love.”