Benjamin been friends with the Rosemont family since he and Nicholas had both been in leading strings, and, while he hadn't seen Julia in many years, he had kept current on her through her brother. Not in a nosy or inappropriate way, of course, but merely out of friendship. Not to mention his old vow. She was his friend, one of the few true friends he had, and he was not about to allow any harm to befall her. No one would hurt he as long as he had a say in the matter. And since he was a duke, he had a great deal of say.
Once upon a time, the three of them had roamed the fields of Seldon Park together, the two older boys and one tag-along little girl with copper-hued hair in messy braids and dirt on her face, her deep brown eyes bright with wit and intelligence. Even now, he couldn't say why he'd taken a real liking to the girl, especially since she was six years younger than he, other than that her disfigurement set her apart from the other girls of his acquaintance.
While the other females he knew had been learning the various feminine arts, Julia had roamed free with her brother, since it was assumed that she would never be out much in society, let alone marry. She'd been promised a season, true, but no one, least of all Julia, expected it to result in anything more than a few nights of entertainment and enjoyment in London. No, she would be given the season, as well as the presentation at court that befitted her station, and then she would become a spinster, old well before her time. If Julia had any objection to that plan, she'd never voiced it. Instead, she simply roamed wild in Sussex, even after Nicholas and Benjamin had gone off to Eton, somehow knowing that she would never have what other young ladies of her station took for granted.
That had been the plan, anyway, until Reginald Rosemont had passed away, leaving his family to pick up the pieces of their shattered life, and a new duke to put the estate's affairs in order, something the old duke had never been particularly good at handling. And somewhere along the way, the plan for Julia's life changed.
Nicholas insisted that his sister, even though she was essentially living in exile in Sussex, had all of the tutors and lessons that a young woman of quality would need to be presented to society. Her wild ways were reigned in, and she was taught the feminine arts that other society misses already knew. In essence, she became the perfect lady, skilled at just about everything she attempted.
That the Duke of Radcliffe had been the one urging Nicholas to do those things for his sister was beside the point.
It was never lost on Benjamin that the tragedy that had befallen the Rosemont family had affected Julia most of all. Even at his young-ish age six years ago, that had been rather plain to him. While Nicholas had returned to town and resumed his life, Julia had languished in Sussex, seeing no one and going nowhere. For some reason, that had made Benjamin unaccountably sad, and he was a man not given overmuch to sentimentality. However, he could not stand to see his old friend become stagnant and grow old before her time. It was just not right.
So he'd convinced, in an underhanded way, of course, Nicholas to give his sister the season she'd been denied, promising to watch over her at functions, not to mention adding a little additional money to the coffers for her dresses, as the Rosemont estate, while financially recovered, was still not quite flush, and generally being a silent, if a bit menacing, guardian angel. Until tonight, that plan had worked splendidly. Julia may have seen him at events, but he was confident that she had no idea he was responsible for her season - even though it was indirectly.
Then those two vipers had unleashed their poisoned tongues on Julia and all of the hard work, including his part in it, had nearly come undone. Even now, he wasn't certain that Julia believed he'd just shown up out of nowhere. Still, from the expression on her face, she was somewhat grateful for his assistance. He hoped.
"Don't allow them to see that they've gotten to you," he said with a forced smile as he spun Julia around the room, leading her in the dance and tying not to notice that she felt soft and warm against him. "If they know, they'll attack again, harder and more vicious next time."
She gave a low snort, very unladylike, but so soft that no one else heard. So much like the Julia he remembered. "As if it could be worse." She looked up at him with eyes so brown that they seemed as if they were tinged with mahogany and amber, reminding him of his favorite scotch. "Thankfully, the season is less than another month long, and then I can return to Sussex and never see any of these dragons again."
"It cannot be that bad, can it?" Benjamin asked uncertainly. He'd thought things were going well for Julia. At least Nicholas had intimated as much. Was it possible that was not the case?
Looking to her left where Letitia and Henrietta still fumed, Julia's skin flushed crimson and white again. "It is worse than you can possibly imagine, my lord."
He noted that she was careful not to call him by his Christian name, as they would have done had then been alone. Her mother, who had been so fearful that Julia would make such a mistake, would have been proud. Except that she was no longer among the living, leaving it up to Benjamin to note such things.
"It was my understanding that you where having a go of things," he tried again, attempting to ascertain the truth of the situation. "I've not heard anything to the contrary from Nicholas." He did, however, think it prudent not to mention the bet in White's legendary book regarding whether or not her scars went all the way down to her stomach, or the lengthy discussions held in many card rooms about her and how she had received the nasty markings.
She lowered her thick, black lashes, and in that moment, Benjamin thought she looked every bit the perfect society miss. Simply lovely. It was a shame others could not see her this way. Though at the thought of another man gazing at Julia thus, his gut tightened, and he found that he did not care of the idea. Not at all.
"He does not know. I have not told him." Her voice was barely a whisper now.
"And Miss Thomas?" Really, the woman was a chaperone and should know better.
Julia turned her gaze back to him, and he was more than a little distressed to see the look of hurt in her eyes. "She sleeps quite a bit. More often than not, actually, and I do not believe her health is as good as we were led to believe. Nicholas does not wish to trouble her and rarely asks her about anything. Not that she could tell him much if he did. She sees very little, particularly what goes on about me."
That made sense, Benjamin decided, and made a note to have a doctor visit Candlewood House on the morrow to check on Miss Thomas. It couldn't hurt, and really, if she was ill, there was a possibility that Julia could become infected as well. That would never do.
As the music swirled around them, Benjamin executed the steps flawlessly. After so many waltzes, he could perform the dance in his sleep if necessary. However, he also noted that Julia was just as skilled as he, or near enough. If she did not dance, was not enjoying the season, then how could she become so skilled? A dancing master could only do so much, after all. He asked her as much.
"I practice alone, or with Meggy, my maid," she said with a sigh, as if it pained her to admit such a thing. "I wish to dance, my lord. Truly I do. But you know as well as I that I am not a diamond of the first water and never shall be. Men are interested in me only a curiosity. Or worse. And I will not allow myself to be pawns in their games as they try to see which one might be the first to lift my skirts."
The words were scandalous, and, had it been anyone other than Julia, Benjamin would have laughed and thought that the chit was coming on to him, hoping to be the next to warm his bed, even though it was well known that he did not seduce virgins. But it was Julia, and she was, as usual, being brutally honest with him, as she always was. This time, however, her words made him see red.
The very idea that any man might attempt to use Julia in that way dredged up the rage he'd felt over the Misses Worth and Cartwright, rage he'd managed to tamp down for Julia's sake, back to the forefront of his mind. No one, but no one would take advantage of Julia, at least not while he was around.
He had sworn to protect Jul
ia when he'd been very young, but he'd never wavered in that commitment. He was not about to begin now.
"Has anyone touched you?" he demanded, knowing that he was glowering at her, his violet eyes probably as dark as a gathering storm, but unable to help it. "If they have, tell me their names and I will gladly dispatch them for you."
In times past, she might have slapped his arm in jest for a remark like that, but tonight, she only squeezed his shoulder, the pressure of her hand on his body so light that he wasn't certain that he'd felt it. "No one has touched me, but word is out among the young men of the ton that I am not an easy mark, despite my physical issues. There are few left at this point who are even interested in trying."
"And so they do not approach you at all," he said what she could not bring herself to.
"Indeed." Julia looked up at him again, and once more, he wondered again why other men could not see what a delight she was. "That leaves only the other young women who have come out this season for companionship, and while some, like Lady Amy Cheltenham, daughter of the Earl of Evanston, are perfectly lovely, many others are, well, not."
Benjamin knew that was as close as she would come to spelling out explicitly what the other young ladies had done to her, but he could guess. As a lot, this year's batch of debutantes were cruel, mostly because of a decided lack of fresh young men available on the marriage mart as well. Those that were eligible were like him - confirmed bachelors who steered clear of the young virgins on display, as well as their matchmaking mamas.
He also felt slightly guilty about the misery she was enduring. Had he not practically forced Nicholas to allow Julia to have her season, she would be safe and secure in Sussex, tucked away in her own little world rather than out here in town at the mercy of the dragons and their daughters. He also worried that she would look back on her time in London as nothing but sheer misery, and that wasn't at all how he'd intended for it to be.
Yes, she had the scars, but, to his mind, they rather added to her beauty, not detracted from it. On the other hand, he could also see how they would make her a target for derision and humiliation. She was different from the rest of the young women, and, if nothing else, the ton feared that which was different. It was part of the reason why they feared him. After all, no one, not even his father, had his lavender eyes, leading many to suspect one or both of his parents had made a deal with the devil. Ridiculous, but then, so was much of society. So while they all respected him, there was a healthy does of fear mixed in as well.
As a woman, Julia was simply mocked and belittled for her differences. And he had been, indirectly at least, the one responsible. That needed to change. He needed to fix the damage he'd caused her and give her some happy memories before she returned to Sussex. For he had no doubt that once she did, she was unlikely to ever leave Seldon Park again.
"We need to change that," he said finally, as the dance began to wind down.
This time when she looked up at him, there was a hint of mirth in her soft smile. "And how, exactly, do you propose to do that, my lord? It is not as if you can force these women to befriend me or the men to dance with me."
He gave her an imperious look, one that normally stopped men in their tracks, but seemed to do little more than annoy her. "If I wanted them to, they would." He squeezed her hand gently. "But I will not. However, have no fear, my lady. I will make this right for you."
"You do not need to, my lord," she assured him, but there was an air of sadness about her that he didn't care for. "It is not as if I will see these people again after next month. I will not attend their weddings, nor will they attend mine." Another delicate snort. "I will not have a wedding, so there will be nothing to attend."
That made Benjamin growl, though whether from her words or the idea of her marrying another, he could not say. "Do not say that! There is a man out there for you." He kept his voice low so that the other dancers on the floor would not overhear them. Again, this was another probably inappropriate conversation, but he and Julia had passed that stage of familiarity long ago.
"No," she said with a finality that chilled him to his very bones, "there is not, Lord Radcliffe, and you and I both know that. I am a spinster now, and a spinster I shall remain. No man can overlook what I am or how I appear. You may be my friend, but you are also a man. You know desire and beauty, and how the two are intertwined. In your heart, you know it's true."
He wanted to deny it, say that he knew no such thing, but the words clogged in his throat. Much as it pained him, he knew she was telling the truth. Julia Rosemont would never have a fairy tale ending. Her life as a lady of society had ended when she was child, in a time she didn't recall, long before it had ever really begun. That was the way of things. It didn't mean he had to like it, however.
The waltz ended and they broke apart before Benjamin led her from the dance floor over to a corner where, as if out of nowhere, Miss Thomas had magically appeared. He left her in the care of her chaperone, murmuring some polite words and trying to ignore the hint of loneliness in her eyes. Not to mention the well of anger that he knew was visible in his.
Quickly, he made his way to the front hall and instructed the butler to send a servant to fetch the Rosemont carriage, as he was certain that both Julia and Avaria would be leaving soon. His suspicion was confirmed a few moments later when he saw the two women emerge into the front hall, Julia uttering some nonsense about a headache, tears glistening in her eyes.
The twinge of guilt he'd felt earlier now blossomed into a full-blown, nagging ache. She was crying. Because of him. Because he'd stupidly reminded her of what she would never have. He'd meant for her to enjoy the season, not for the social whirl to cause her pain. But it had, and he was at fault. And tonight, in trying to make things better for her, in attempting to save her, he'd brought all of the pain she'd somehow buried back into the open.
He had tried to be kind, telling her that one day she might marry, but all he'd done was spin lies and fairy tales, which had only served to hurt her further. He knew as well as she that it would take a very special man to overlook her scars, and quite frankly, Benjamin wasn't certain a man like that existed in the ton. He didn't notice them, but they'd grown up together. He was used to them and now thought of them as simply a part of a beautiful whole.
As he watched her take her wrap and then depart through the wide front door, Benjamin made up his mind to undo his mistakes, or as many of them as he could. She was suffering because of him, so therefore, it was up to him to make her smile again. He had no doubt that he could do it. And best of all, he had a plan.
Chapter Two
"You were dancing with Lord Radcliffe tonight." It was a statement, not a question, and Julia didn't even bother to ask how Meggy, her lady's maid, knew that she'd danced with the handsome duke at the ball. Julia had long since discovered exactly how swiftly the rumor mill belowstairs moved and was no longer surprised by it.
"I was." Meggy pulled out the last of Julia's pins, and Julia shook her thick mane of coppery brown hair hair, thankful to be free of the restrictive hairstyle. "He's an old family friend. Longer than my memory. You know that."
Pulling back, Meggy put her hands on her hips, clearly disapproving. "And a charming rake, as well, from what I hear." She shook her finger at Julia in warning. "Watch yourself, miss. He's not to be trusted. I hear stories, you know. He's..."
Rising, Julia pushed away from her dressing table, her fury, bottled up since earlier in the evening, rising now. "Yes, yes, I know. He has deflowered scores of innocent virgins and has left a path of broken hearts a mile wide through the beau monde." She'd heard all this before and each time, it exasperated her more than the last. "He's been my friend since childhood, Meggy. I grew up with him. Of all the men in the ton, I am safest with Benjamin."
"Benjamin is it now?" Meggy was practically scolding her mistress, something Julia didn't care for at all. "I didn't know you were on such familiar terms with the duke. Is there anything else I should be aware of, my l
ady?"
Julia shot Meggy a menacing glare, one of the many tricks she'd picked up from Benjamin over the years. "No, and it is not your place to interfere. We have been friends for ages. I do not remember a time when he has not been a part of my life. He has been a friend when all others have abandoned me. So yes, in private, I call him Benjamin. It is my right, one of the few I have left to me, and I will enjoy it!"
She knew her chest was heaving and her anger palpable, but she did not care. How dare anyone question her relationship with Benjamin? They were friends. Nothing more. That she might dream of him when she was alone, imagine how it might feel if he were to kiss her or touch her, well that was her business and no one else's.
"I'm sorry, miss." Meggy was contrite now, if not overly apologetic, knowing she'd overstepped her bounds, and probably afraid for her job as well. Servants did not speak that way to those who employed them, at least not usually, another sign of how different the Rosemont household was from others. Or at least how different Meggy was. "I truly am. I just don't want to see you hurt is all."
Julia settled back in her chair, shooing away Meggy's hands when the other woman attempted to braid her hair into a plait for the evening. "I won't be, but thank you anyway. Lord Radcliffe is my oldest friend, and, unlike many other women of the ton, I have no wish to get him into the parson's noose. He is simply Benjamin. A fixture. Nothing more or less. Can you understand that?"
"I believe you, miss," Meggy agreed as she rose to leave, knowing by her mistress' stiff posture and chilly attitude that her services were no longer wanted. "He is your friend, after all." She paused. "Will you need anything else?"
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