Hollis studied the rim of his coffee cup, trying to choose his words carefully before responding to his daughter. “The world as we now know it is completely different than the world in which I grew up. Who would have ever imagined someone might attempt to assassinate the President of the United States and then be found not guilty by reason of insanity? We never worried our American diplomats and citizens would be held hostage in a land clear across the world for 444 days, and who would have ever dreamed a group of Legionnaires would attend a convention and 34 of them would die from a form of pneumonia that would later be named after them. I want you to see this beautiful world of ours, but I want you to be careful, Savannah. There’s an equal abundance of wonder and ugliness. I know I’ll never be able to hold you back. I’ve known it since you were just a little girl.”
Lily Mae took Hollis’ hand and studied his eyes before speaking. “That gypsy soul has taken hold. All we can do is lift her high in prayer. Those boundaries are about to be no more, I’m afraid to say. I want you to ponder that and ponder it hard.” Hollis nodded, knowing the truth of her words.
Katherine looked at Murphy, in anticipation of his wise response. He didn’t disappoint her. “The old proverb says a rolling stone gathers no moss.” As his voice cracked a bit, he finished, “You know life with moss. We want you to go and explore, and I know in time you will return. This moss, this land, is a part of who you are.”
Perhaps it began with her inquisitive mind, curious about all the mysteries of planet earth or maybe it was the plethora of books at her fingertips, but the combination of the two would one day result in an award-winning journalist who would travel places worldwide and make a staggering discovery that would change her life forever.
Leaving
They knew she was leaving them all behind when she enrolled at Northwestern to study journalism. Just as it should be, they reminded each other.
Her writing only intensified at the leading school of journalism, and her curiosity fueled her drive to explore. Phone calls were frequent, but most cherished were the letters she sent weekly, without fail. They gathered and listened as Hollis read each epistle aloud. The format was familiar. They could hear her voice.
Dear Ones,
This I know:
–I can survive on four hours of sleep and still function fairly well. Why sleep when I could be exploring? I bet Hollis is shuddering right now as he reads this.
–Student government is invigorating. Clark Courtway and I are working on a debate together – Cuban trade embargos. He’s actually been to Cuba. Fascinating! I’m sure Murphy has been. Anyone else?
–Remember what I told you earlier about my English professor, Dr. Lance? He’s top notch. He returned everyone’s writing assignment today except mine, asking me to stay after class so we could discuss it. Turns out he thought it was the strongest style and voice he’s seen in a long while from any of his freshmen writing courses. Wants me to consider having it published! I know you’re smiling. So am I.
–Would you mind if I brought someone home with me for fall break? I’d like for Clark to see my home and my people. You’ll like him. Everyone does.
So……what do you know?
–Hollis?
–Katherine?
–Murphy?
–Lily Mae?
I’m waiting to hear! See you Friday, next!
All my love,
Savannah
p.s. Lily Mae’s cookies were a hit! Clark is incredulous that anyone can cook like that. My response? “Welcome to my world!”
Not a single letter arrived without a mention of Clark. They met the first week of school and had a couple of classes together their first semester. Several years older than Savannah, he had served in the Air Force for four years, and now attended college on the G.I. Bill. Murphy, Katherine, Lily Mae, Clarence, and Hollis instantly liked him. He was solid and genuine, and they wondered how long it would take Savannah to realize Clark walked around in a complete state of adoration of her.
Dear Ones,
This I know:
–Clark instantly fell in love with each of you. You are all he wants to talk about. Looks like I’ll be bringing him back again. All your kind comments about him were so apropos.
–We lost three girls on my floor after fall break. Two decided the rigor of Northwestern was more than they could handle, and one discovered her funding fell through, but I think secretly she was glad. Thank you for allowing me the privilege of being here.
–I’ve already started planning my schedule for next semester, and I have my fingers crossed I get Dr. Jordan for my lit class. Murphy, she said she knew you. Who doesn’t, is what I wanted to ask but decided against it. After all, she is the dept. chair. You raised me well!
This I don’t know:
–Hollis, what do you mean you noticed the way Clark stands back while I command a room with my stories? I don’t get that. He’s not a back-of-the-room kind of guy. Katherine and Lily Mae, do you agree? Is this one of those male-vs-female observations?
So….what do you know?
–Hollis?
–Katherine?
–Murphy?
–Lily Mae?
All my love,
S.
Each time she departed Beechwood they all marveled at the way she was changing, becoming even more beautiful, more magnetic, more dynamic than before. She had morphed into a breath-taking, charismatic, confident young woman.
Dear Ones,
This I know:
–How can my first year of college be ending so soon? It’s just not possible. Wasn’t it only yesterday we arrived on campus for move-in day? I didn’t think the nine months of my senior year of high school would ever end, yet these nine months of my freshman year at Northwestern have flown by with the speed of Haley’s Comet.
–Lily Mae, I told Clark what you said about him being the one who understood my “brilliance” (yes, I used quotation marks when I said that word aloud). He laughed and told me to tell you he figured out a long time ago he knew he’d never be able to tame me if I decided to go in a direction that didn’t include him. I don’t know what to think about that, actually.
–I found out today I was chosen to interview Dr. Samuel Renburg when he comes to campus to share his story about his experiences at Auschwitz. I’m thrilled but shocked. I had to audition, and I think everyone assumed an upperclassman would get the assignment. Believe me, I’ve done my homework on this one. Remember all the dinner table conversations we had over the years about the Holocaust? Little did we know what was in store for me.
So . . . what do you know?
–Hollis?
–Katherine?
–Murphy?
–Lily Mae?
All my love,
S.
Home on Christmas break her sophomore year, Savannah and Katherine talked late into the night after everyone else had gone to bed.
“I’m so glad Clark was able to join us for Christmas. It’s very kind of his family to share him with us. I’d like to meet them one day. You like them very much don’t you?”
“I do. They’re good people. I think Clark loves his step-mother as much as he loves his father. They’ve been together most of his life.”
“I only know bits and pieces about that. How did that come about? I remember you told me his mother died, but that’s all I know. What happened?”
“Well, Clark shouldered responsibility at an early age. He was seven when his mother died from complications after a car accident and, as the oldest of three children, a great deal depended on him. Late at night when everyone else was asleep, he grieved. His father remarried Julie just a year after his mother’s death, and he said it was as though she brought a glue to help them put the pieces of their lives back together. Clark has always loved Julie, but as a young boy he still grieved each night
and longed to have his mother hold him. He slept with her picture under his pillow every night for years. He said the pain lessened in time, but the hole remained.”
Katherine listened intently. “That’s what grief does to us. I remember missing my father so severely I wouldn’t go to sleep for fear I would wake up and forget everything about him. Doc and Lily Mae had to help me realize he was permanently fixed in my heart, but it took years to fully grasp his mortality, if it’s at all possible. How unusual that you two have something so painful in common, losing your mothers so young.”
“When Clark first told me about his father and step-mother and younger brothers, I envied the warmth in his eyes and the tenderness in his voice. And when he told me how difficult it was to lose his mother, I wept with him. He shared with me things he had never told anyone. He said it seemed as though he was waiting to release it until he found someone who knew the enormity of the pain.”
“Oh, Savannah. Only ones who have had someone stolen from them would come close to understanding those words.”
“In his eyes she was perfect. His father never tried to bury her memory or diminish his pain. He feels blessed to have been loved by two mothers.”
Katherine suddenly worried she might know where this was headed, and she was right.
Savannah searched her face before continuing, “The enigma for me has always been the wonder of how my life would have changed if Dad had remarried or if I had had siblings. I envy Clark for having actual memories of his mother. I don’t have any of that. It’s as though all of my mother’s belongings died with her when she left this world. I have one photograph of my mother, and I used to see it only once a year, October 2nd to be exact, her birthday, when Dad would pull it out, and we’d look at it together. It was always too painful for him, so I rarely asked him to tell me about her. When you initiate a conversation that makes your father cry, you tend to stay away from those things. I once took a picture of that photograph and developed it in my dark room, but Dad never knew. You know what I used to do with it? I slept with it under my pillow at night.”
Proposal
Dear Ones,
This I know:
–With your blessings, Clark and I and four others are planning to spend two months this summer backpacking in Europe, sleeping in hostels, dining with the locals, and soaking up all the history and architecture. I am chomping at the bit to capture all the sights with my new Nikon—thanks again, Murphy!
–I’m almost finished with two applications…one for grad school at Boston U and the other for an internship at The Boston Globe. I’m inclined to put them both in the mailbox at the same time and just sit back and see which one materializes first. Such a gamble!
Advice? Don’t hold back.
–Would you believe the new priest at St. Peter’s went to seminary with Father Drew? We are having dinner with him next week. He insinuated, with a delighted grin, he has a lot of dirt to divulge on Kingston’s illustrious clergyman. Tell Father Drew I will keep nothing from him!
So . . . what do you know?
–Hollis?
–Katherine?
–Murphy?
–Lily Mae?
All my love,
S.
Dear Ones,
This I know:
–Are you really sure I can handle both at the same time…grad school and internship??? Katherine predicted they would both open up for me, and we all know she’s never wrong! I think I’m going to give it a try, but I really want to know what each of you think.
–What was turning into a debacle trying to plan the travel itineraries for six seems to be working itself out. Everyone is dropping like flies so it appears it will only be Clark and me taking the backpacking sojourn. Fine with us!
–Murphy, thanks for the list of contacts for our trip. How is it possible you know people all over the world? YOU are the precise reason we are beginning our trip in Ireland.
So . . . what do you know?
–Hollis?
–Katherine?
–Murphy?
–Lily Mae?
All my love,
S.
P.S. You do realize my postcards will consist mostly of abbreviations while we are traveling?? We will have so much to tell and such limited space. How well you decipher will be a test of how well you know me!
Another P.S. Tell Father Drew his secret is out! Who knew he was known as the seminary prankster at Sewanee?
Postcard from Salzburg
D.O.-
T.I.K-
–Having the time of our lives. Realize how young America is in comparison. Have seen buildings erected B.C. Impressive and mind-boggling at the same time. Thank you for instilling art appreciation. Such a blessing.
–Have not eaten anything we don’t love. L.M.’s advice to sample everything was spot on.
–Had dinner last night with Ambassador Tucker at the embassy in Austria. Charming man. Considers Murphy a dear friend.
–See you in ten days. So much to tell!
So, W.D.Y.K? H? K? M? LM?
L, S & C
So, somewhere in-between classes and weekends and dates with other people, football games, debate tournaments, cramming for finals, and their summer in Europe, it all became clear to Savannah. The realization she didn’t intend to live a life without Clark seemed to calm her to the core. And she told him just that when they came home to Beechwood in October of their senior year.
Fishing together in the canoe she asked him, “Do you want to journey life beside me? Because I can’t imagine me trying to live it without you.”
“I cannot believe you, Savannah! You wait until I reel in a fish the size of a deep freeze, and then you throw that at me? If that’s a proposal I’m going to ignore it because I’m going to do the proposing, and if you think I’m going to ask you to marry me then you better wipe that little mess of catfish bait off your forehead and for once, sit still and stop talking!”
And by the time they paddled back to shore they were engaged. Nothing had ever felt more right in her life than that very moment. They celebrated that evening with all the other important people in Savannah’s life. The giddiness in the house was contagious.
“We’re thinking maybe sometime in the fall, maybe even here on the farm, and I’m hoping Lily Mae, if she’s willing…”
“Your wedding dress? Oh, child, I’ll gladly take my thimble out of retirement if it means I get to make your wedding gown. These old hands have been aching for something to make them feel useful again. Strike up the band and ring the bells!”
The light danced in everyone’s eyes. The chance to watch a grown up Savannah wed Clark on their land, wearing a dress made by Lily Mae’s expert hands, in the season when the land was the most impressive, was a series of beautiful gifts wrapped up in one glorious package.
They all looked to Hollis, the father of the bride. With pride in his voice he said, “We better get busy. We have a wedding in about eleven months.”
“Not next fall, Dad, we mean the fall after Clark finishes law school and I finish grad school. Four years away.”
Murphy was dumbfounded, and his argument was a strong one. “So, why do you two want to wait to begin the best years of your life? Why not marry as soon as you can? But what do I know, I’m just an old man who still can’t believe the nurse fell in love with a dopey guy like me. I would have married her twenty years earlier if I could have.”
“We don’t think there’s adequate time to plan a wedding, move to Boston and both of us begin something new this fall. I’ll be adjusting to law school, and Savannah will begin her internship with The Boston Globe as well as grad school and neither of us wants to lessen the importance of any of it by compromising our time.”
Savannah stood next to him, resting her head on his shoulder. “I can tell you’re disappointed that it’s not
going to happen in a few months, and I hope you understand why. Let’s just say we’re sure there won’t be a wedding this year, but it will happen sometime in the next four years.”
Hollis raised his glass and offered a toast, “Here’s to the bride and groom and their wedding at Beechwood, whenever it might occur. God speed!” After a hearty round of cheers, the room divided into two camps with the women talking wedding dresses and the men talking Harvard Law.
When they drove Lily Mae back into town that evening Katherine noticed she was deep in thought. “What’s on your mind? There’s something you don’t like. What is it?”
“I’m not sure. I felt it when I hugged Savannah just now. It’s powerful, and I don’t want to say the words aloud.”
With a heaviness in his voice, Murphy said, “Tell us, Lily Mae. We know the power of your intuition, and I clearly hear the worry in your voice.” He found her statement foreboding. He had witnessed Lily Mae’s intuition time and time again and knew it possessed power. He pulled off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, anxious to hear what was coming next.
“I don’t think this will happen. Not anytime soon at least. It’s in my gut. Something’s telling me we won’t be around to see it happen. Actually, the Lord’s telling me.”
The three of them never spoke again of Lily Mae’s prediction. They waited to see what the future held for their Savannah. It would be three years before the pieces fell together. A bomb would rock their world. Even Lily Mae’s prophesy had not prepared them for the depth of its destruction.
Letters on the Table Page 13