by Leanne Davis
“She’s worried about you.”
“I don’t need her worry.”
“I am weird-looking to someone like her. And I am married. And you do have a lot of money. What else should she think? Maybe she just said out loud what everyone else was thinking.”
His eyebrows rose. “Thinking of what?”
She looked down, then up into his eyes, and saw he was looking at her differently than usual. There was an intensity there that made her physically step back.
“Thinking of me trying to get to your money.”
“That would mean you were after me. Are you?”
Her mouth opened, but nothing came out. He continued, “And my money has nothing to do with things.”
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened them, she said quietly, “No. Not this time.”
He nodded, taking a step towards her. “I’m glad you see that.”
She looked around and stared at the carpet. “What am I doing here?”
“I think you know exactly why you’re here.”
He approached her, closing the distance between them. Finally, after all this time together, and then being separated, Nick’s hands were physically on her. He ran his fingers along her arms down to the hemline of her cover-up, which he pulled over her head before staring down at her nearly naked body. His eyes flashed hot, but his face remained stoic. Was he repulsed at what he saw? Was he shocked by how skinny she was? Or how small her breasts were? She couldn’t tell.
He walked her backwards towards his couch, and took the blanket draped over the back, shaking it out and wrapping her in it. The warmth felt good, but his hands felt even better, as they kept rubbing her. Then he leaned down, fitting his mouth over hers, gently at first, and letting his lips move over hers softly, slowly, with only enough pressure to make her feel him.
Her anticipation began to build, starting in her core, rising through her body, and electrifying all her nerve endings. Blood began pumping through her veins, faster and harder. When his mouth opened over hers, she naturally followed and opened hers, as their tongues intertwined. She nearly moaned at the new sensations, sending the sparks shooting through her, and ending abruptly between her legs. She didn’t know anything could feel this good, this quickly, or this intensely. She lifted her arms from her sides and wrapped them around his neck.
Then the kiss took over, and he lifted her off her feet, and set her on the back of the couch. He quickly unhooked her swimsuit from behind her neck and separated the sides, as he peeled the material down to her waist. His hands cupped her breasts, and she nearly jumped off the couch in surprise at the lust she felt when his warm hands passed over her still moist nipples. They were aching and craving his touch now. She pressed her chest into his hands, wanting more. And wanting it now.
He kept kissing her, his mouth following her jaw, and down her neck. She arched the column of her throat for his lips. She closed her eyes as the sensations, hot and wet, slid over her skin. His hands shifted as he proceeded to take her swimsuit all the way off. She lifted her butt off the couch to help, unsure why she was doing this or why it seemed so okay. And why, finally, they were doing this.
He lifted her completely up again, his hands supporting her bare bottom against him, and she looped her hands around his neck. He kept kissing her as he moved them, towards his bedroom.
She felt the wall when she bumped against it with her back and he shifted, taking off his swim shorts while still supporting her. Her legs wrapped around his waist, and her body was on fire, as wet inside as she was outside. He seemed hot and heavy under her, and she sighed in ecstasy, in anticipation. He shifted her body, pressing her against the wall, and still somehow, supporting both of them. His mouth was wet and warm on hers again, and his tongue filled her mouth as he suddenly pushed inside her.
She gasped in shock. He was so much. And it was so hot. He filled her completely, making her insides stretch to accommodate him. She groaned at the sensations rocking through her. When he moved, she moaned, and when he shifted her, she nearly screamed. Holy shit! It was so good. He started moving fast, eventually pounding into her until he suddenly stiffened when he came inside her. She moaned and shuddered, as she responded to the blindingly hot sensations. Sensations she barely recalled, owing to the lengthy time since she last enjoyed sex. And the last time since she’d been well enough, rested enough, and relaxed enough to have it culminate in an orgasm.
And finally, now it happened. Except it wasn’t with her husband, Rob. It was with Nick Lassiter.
Then everything seemed to get completely, almost painfully quiet. And there they were, with her body pressed against the wall, his body supporting hers, his head on her shoulders, and his warm breath on her neck. Both bodies hot and sweaty, their dampness still faintly scented with chlorine. Nick sighed deeply and cursed to himself. Joelle bit her lip. Should she say something? What could she say that might ease the terrible discomfort suddenly overtaking her, and radiating into the air around them?
Nick’s shoulders shifted under her hands, as he slipped out of her. She had to pull her head back before they finally made eye contact. His face was impassive as he looked into her eyes, before gazing off at something else. Oh my God, he couldn’t even look at her. He adjusted her in order to carry her with one arm under her knees, while cradling her with the other by supporting her back. He moved away from the wall, bearing her effortlessly into the bedroom where she assumed he intended to go to in the first place.
He lay her down on the bed, as easily as one of his nieces, and pushed the covers back, scooting her in and climbing in next to her, while covering them both. His hands moved back to her body; as he rubbed along her arms and back, heating her skin all over again. She had been sweating, and overheating, but now was shivering.
Her mind was reeling, jumbled, and trying to catch up with what just happened to her, and between them. Nick and her. She felt dizzy after her quick, and totally unexpected orgasm, which only managed to intrigue her as to why it happened. And what, if anything, it meant for them.
“I’m sorry.”
She opened her eyes when she registered Nick was speaking to her, feeling slightly disappointed to hear he was apologizing to her.
She turned her head on the pillow so she was looking toward his windows. She could not, no, would not meet his gaze.
“I meant to make it into here. At least to the bed. But I–”
“Didn’t.”
“I didn’t. It’s just that with you here, like this. I didn’t expect it, ever. I couldn’t think straight.”
“Does that happen very often?”
“What? Up against the wall? No. Maybe it should though.”
A smile finally cracked on her face as she replied, “I meant, you not thinking clearly.”
“No. Not very often.”
“Hence, the millions you have. Still, you should try it more often.”
He placed his fingers on her chin and turned her face towards him. She had to look him in the eye. “We didn’t use anything.”
“I’m on birth control.” Erica had helped her find a kind that didn’t make her feel sick.
His eyes narrowed in on her face. “Why?”
“Why? So I don’t end up like I was a few months ago in the hospital.”
“No, I mean why? For Rob?”
“No. Not for anyone. For me. I’m surprised you aren’t more careful.”
“Usually, I am. Actually, always I am.”
“But this isn’t usual?”
“You know that it isn’t.”
Then what is this? And why did it happen?
He shifted on the bed, and flopped onto his back, his hands resting on his chest. “Christ,” he said, blowing out a stream of air. “You never wanted to sleep with me, did you?”
“No. I wasn’t going to sleep with you.”
“Why did you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Not really very reassuring, Joelle.”
<
br /> “I don’t know what to say to you.”
He was quiet for a long, drawn-out moment. “Say, ‘Oh Nick that was fantastic. Do it again.’”
She didn’t expect the humor, or the sudden smile that lifted his lips with warmth that rose right up to his eyes. She shook her head. “Nobody talks like that. Especially not a girl like me.”
“Woman. I don’t sleep with girls.”
“You think I’m a girl.”
“No, I tried to think of you as a girl.”
“Why?”
“Because you were married. And you were too young for me. Or I’m too old for you, however you want to look at it, I didn’t think we’d ever get here.”
“And now?”
“Now I guess we’re here.”
“I’m still married.”
“And too young. I’ve spent the past few months having this same argument with myself.”
“And yet–”
“And yet here you are, aren’t you?”
“I guess, here we are.”
“You have never slept with anyone, but Rob, have you?”
She jerked her head off the pillow. “How did you know that?”
Nick sighed. “Because this isn’t easy for you. You’re still nervous with me.”
“I’m not nervous.”
“You’re not exactly comfortable. I can feel you holding your muscles clenched.”
He was right, she was all tensed up. He rolled towards her, putting his hand under her chin, and lifting her mouth before kissing her again.
“Your first words about us were swear words.”
He nuzzled her throat and kissed her before he finally laughed softly against her hair. “I didn’t curse at you. I cursed at how it happened. I should have done this differently. I meant to; I really did. I was pissed off at my sister, and at you being the subject of ridicule and condescension by one person or another. I actually meant to seduce you by having dinner and conversation and all that. Not ripping off your swimsuit and plowing you against the wall before you could think straight.”
“Really? You think you didn’t do it well enough?”
“I didn’t.”
She smiled a timid smile. “You did, and besides, I know.”
“You know what?”
“What you’re like.”
“How? Did Erica tell you?”
“No. We don’t sit around gossiping about you, if that’s what you’re hoping. I meant, I know what kind of man you are. You’ve always been good to me. You’ve thought about what I needed, wanted, should have, before I could even think of it. I know you. I don’t know much about life or myself anymore, but I do know you.”
He looked at her, hard, long, and intently. “So, you liked that?”
“Yes.”
“You don’t say a word. You barely even breathe differently.”
She shrugged. “It’s just me. Don’t take it personally.”
“Should I take this happening personally?”
“Do you?”
“Yeah, big time.”
“Me too.”
He stared at her again.
“Why do you keep staring at me?”
He lifted a hand to touch her hair that was dry now and frizzing out of the knot at the back of her head. “I just like looking at you, all healed up. Your face is so pretty, and normally colored. You don’t know how good it makes me feel just to see you well.”
“Oh.”
“Speaking of looking,” he said, as he lifted the covers off her, and slid them back. Her body was fully exposed as the daylight snuck through the far windows.
“What are you doing?” she asked, jerking to attention.
“Finding number four and five.”
“What?” Tattoos. Their previous conversation echoed through her mind, and she shifted as she grabbed at the bedspread.
“Come on, I’ve been wondering for months. It keeps me up at night.”
“It does not! But fine. Here,” she said, turning to the left, and showing the one on her stomach, right at her belly button. Zenith was on her back, and the only reason he hadn’t seen it until now was her swimsuit strap happened to cover it.
He let out an exaggerated sigh. “Well, that was disappointing.”
“What do you mean?”
“I had it pictured on your ass, or even–”
“You’re a pervert, you know that?”
“Well, it was nice for a few fantasies.”
“You haven’t been fantasizing about me, least of all, my tattoos. They can’t be your thing.”
“No. They’re not. But you? You are my thing. You didn’t think I kissed you like that awhile back just because I felt sorry for you, did you? I wanted you then, but you weren’t ready.”
She didn’t know what to make of knowing that Nick Lassiter was thinking of her like that, like this, for some time. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it. It sent thrills through her… and made her pulse skitter rapidly. Nick scared her. She spent a lot of her time shying away from even thinking about sleeping with Nick. It never seemed like a good idea to her. Or even a possible idea. But now it was fact. It was done. “How do you go from Erica to me?”
“About the same way you go from Rob to me.”
“I’m all wrong for you. You wouldn’t have ever given me a second look if you hadn’t felt so sorry for me. The hair, my clothes, all of it is wrong for you.”
“No, I wouldn’t have looked twice at you. Not because of how you looked, but because you were too young for me, and you were married.”
“And because we’re so mismatched.”
“Because you’re so lost. We aren’t anything until you figure out yourself.”
“But I’m here now.”
Nick sighed. “That, Joelle, is the problem. You’re here. And I want you to stay here.”
She closed her mouth. She knew what their problems were and they started with her violation of Number One: she never intended to sleep with Nick Lassiter, her boss, a man who wasn’t her husband.
The phone rang suddenly, breaking the cocoon-like feel of the room. Joelle sat up, bringing his luxurious covers with her, clutching them close to her body. Nick glared at the phone, but leaned over and took it off the cradle, bringing it to his ear with a gruff hello.
“Peyton? Hey. Yeah, sorry I didn’t call sooner, I got tied up,” Nick said, glancing at her. He suddenly swung his body around, planting his feet on the ground, with his head resting on his hand, and his elbow on his knee.
“Look, ah, about tonight. What? Oh the party was fine. Poppy loved it, thanks for asking. Anyway, one of my sisters is here, yeah, she needs some help with a situation. So, I’m going to have to cancel tonight.
“Uh-huh. Yeah. Thanks, for understanding. Yeah, I’ll take care of her. Uh-huh, see you. Bye.”
He hung up the phone, and moving very slowly, finally turned towards her. Joelle saw the regret gleaming in his eyes.
“Oh my God, you had a date tonight? With whom? Erica’s replacement? You have a girlfriend?” Joelle shot up with alarm as she spoke. She had no clothes, but for the blanket she was wrapped in.
“No. I don’t. And it wasn’t so much a date as just attending a function. And in my defense, how could I have known you’d end up here? I haven’t seen or heard from you in months.”
“You forgot about her? Your date?”
He frowned, looking puzzled. “Well, yeah. I did.”
“Then why did you invite me to the stupid pool party?”
He sighed. “I didn’t.”
“Erica said–”
“Erica dumped me because she thinks I wanted you like this.”
Joelle’s mouth dropped open. She didn’t know what to say. All these months, she’d never known this? Never suspected? “Why doesn’t Erica hate me?”
“Because apparently, she realized that she wanted what she believes we feel for each other. So she was okay with it, I guess. I don’t know. Ask her sometime. You live with her.”
Joelle turned, fully intending to flee the room, the apartment, and his life, forever.
Nick was up, and at the door before she got there. He shut the door, and kept it firmly shut with his hand high enough that she couldn’t reach it. She glared up at him, clumsily clutching the blanket around her.
He ran a hand through his hair. The curls didn’t get messed up, but simply sprang back to where they started, like memory foam. “Slow down. You have this terrible tendency to freak out only at me and nobody else. So before you start yelling at me, would you at least let me explain?”
“Explain what? What I’m doing here?”
“The date was nothing, just a woman I know. I’m not serious about anyone. Tonight, was just another business function. I’m sorry she called, and I’m sorry I forgot to call her first. I was surprised when you walked in with Erica. I suspected, knowing how shy you are, that it wasn’t your idea, but Erica’s doing. And I was glad she did. Very glad she did.”
“I shouldn’t be here.”
“I know. But you are. So what are you going to do? Run and hide? Forget it? Pretend it didn’t happen? Run back to your husband? That’s what this is about, isn’t it? Rob? Your guilt, and your conflicts of interest. This isn’t about whether or not I had a date.”
“I don’t know.”
“I do,” he said quietly as he turned. She could see the hurt in his body language, the way his shoulders dropped. “As always, it’s about him. Not us. We’re never alone, just us, just me and you.” He headed over to his bed, and sat on it, his posture sagging even lower.
She was quiet for a long moment, just staring at his back. She hurt him? She didn’t have the power to hurt Nick. Did she? She took tentative steps towards him, and waited until she was directly in front of him before she whispered, “Nick?”
He stared harder at his bare feet. He didn’t look up, but answered in a flat-toned voice, “What?”
She nudged his foot with hers. “I was jealous.”
“Of what?” His gaze shot up to hers.
“I was jealous of whoever you had a date with. That’s why I got mad.”
“You got jealous?”
“Yes.”
His eyebrows lowered and he frowned. “You don’t get jealous.”