by Nicole Heck
Three minutes were left. Cars continued to drive by, and, I swear, in that one minute the temperature dropped significantly. It all seemed pretty surreal to me. Thinking back on the past few weeks, I didn’t imagine myself even dating, at least not until Gabe was better. Maybe not even until I was finished with school.
Snow fell from the sky. The touch of the light snowflakes on my bare hands made them colder. I buried them in my jacket pockets to try and keep them warm. Continuing to watch the street in front of me, people were leaving the bar that was just outside of the arena. A couple in particular stood out to me. You could tell by watching them that they were genuinely happy. She walked outside laughing, her head lying on his shoulder as he held her hand. They walked to the car parked across the street. Opening the door for her, he kissed her on the forehead and shut the door behind her as she sat in.
I wasn’t sure if I was more jealous or scared. As much as I wanted something like that, I was also terrified. I didn’t know what it felt like to love and to be loved. Seeing my friends be happy and then completely heartbroken and going through that over and over again scared me. I don’t want that to happen to me. But I remember my parents’ relationship, and they were always happy. I don’t know of a time that they ever argued.
After getting lost in my thoughts, I looked down at my phone. There was only a minute left until Christian said he would meet me.
{12}
Christian
I didn’t think the game would ever end. I loved playing basketball, so I never thought I would see the day that I would want to do something more. But today was just that. The entire game the only thing I could think about was my second date with Zoe.
After the game, I quickly showered and began to get ready. I told her I would meet her a half an hour after the game ended. That was my estimate, anyway. After the game ended, our coach would talk to us for, on average, ten to fifteen minutes, then I would meet with a reporter for five minutes, then showering and getting ready shouldn’t take me much longer than that. I should be out there just in time.
Tonight was going to be perfect. I wanted to make up for the first date. Since it was so cold out, I planned to take Zoe to a small bakery closer to school. It closed hours before the game, but I knew the owners well, and after telling them what I wanted to do, they agreed without hesitation. I’m going to bring her there, and a table will be set for two with a candle lit in the middle. A fire will be burning in the fireplace, and the bakery would be lit up with Christmas lights. Thanks to Zoe’s friend, I found out what her favorite dessert was and had the owners prepare it for her. Luckily, I was able to do this on a whim and under short notice. I wanted it to be romantic. I had planned this earlier in the day, taking a good chance that she would accept my date invitation.
However, everything seemed to be going wrong. Anxiety was thriving inside of me now. Our coach talked for longer than usual, and tonight, not one, but two reporters wanted to talk to me. Their interviews were longer than usual too. I should have known that everyone would want to talk after this big win. We defeated the number one team in the conference. Everyone called tonight's game the MAAC Championship Finals preview. My phone was trapped in the locker room, and I didn’t have access to it until after I was done with the interviews. I had no idea what time it was.
Entering the locker room in a rush, I scrambled through my stuff to reach my phone. Good. I had 10 minutes to shower and get ready. I decided to text Zoe to let her know I might be a few minutes longer so I didn’t make her worry.
I ran my hand through my semi-wet hair, buttoned my shirt, and threw on my jacket. Zipping up my bag and collecting all of my things, I ran out of the locker room. The path from the locker room to where I said I would meet her seemed longer than I remembered. The arena was empty by now, which made it easier for me to run a straight path. I raced down the court, and found my way to where I would meet her.
I got to the door and saw through the glass a girl sitting on the very steps where she said she was. Her hood was up, and her hands were tucked in her jacket. It was dark out, but no one else was here. My heart was racing, and I saw my reflection in the door. I was smiling. This girl was doing more to me than I had realized, and I still barely knew her.
Opening the door, I walked quickly toward her.
“Zoe! Sorry. I tried to get ready as fast as I could!”
The girl turned around and stared at me.
It wasn’t Zoe.
I looked down at my phone to see if she had texted me, and I had a new text from her from about five minutes ago. Looking at our conversation, I felt awful. My text to her about being later than I thought I would was still typed out as a draft. I never hit send.
“I’m an idiot,” I said aloud and threw my bag onto the ground. The girl who I mistakenly called Zoe continued to stare.
“I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else.” I quickly picked up my bag and walked toward my car.
She texted me to tell me she didn’t feel well and wanted to go home and sleep. As much as I wanted to believe it, I had left her sitting there thinking I probably wasn’t coming because again I was late without letting her know. She probably thought I was ditching her. I picked up my phone and called her.
No answer.
I wondered how long she was even waiting for or if she decided not to come all-together.
“I really thought tonight was going to be perfect,” I mumbled under my breath while I threw my bag in the back of my car before speeding off.
{13}
Gabe
“How was your night last night?” I asked Zoe. She entered my room with breakfast so I could eat it in bed. This was my favorite part of the weekend. She made the best pancakes!
“I didn’t go. I didn’t feel well.”
“Oh, that sucks. I’m sorry. Are you feeling better today? What’s wrong? Where were you supposed to go anyways?” I fell asleep early last night, even before the game ended, which was probably why I didn’t hear her come home early.
“Just out with some friends.”
“Friends? What friends were you going out with?” She always told me who she was going out with.
“Some from school,” she replied. Okay, now she’s not telling me something.
“You never go out with friends from school.”
“Well, I was going to.”
“But you didn’t. Why?” She was hiding something from me.
“I said I didn’t feel well.”
“Oh. So are you feeling better now? You seem fine to me.”
“Yes, much better. I think it was something I ate. In fact, since I wasn’t home to hang out with you last night before you went to sleep, how about I take you out today for a special treat?”
She wanted to take me out for a special treat, and she made me pancakes. She was definitely hiding something. Zoe has been too afraid to take me places since I’ve become more sick. What was she lying to me about?
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“We’re going to go to the store. I’m going to buy you ice cream of your choice and as many toppings as you want to make an ice cream sundae. You can pick out movies too. We will have a ice cream and a movies day!”
“Yay! I love when you let me eat ice cream!” I was going to get to the bottom of this. Zoe never lied to me, but I had to go along with it. If I kept questioning her now she might back out on getting me ice cream, and I really wanted ice cream.
“I love ice cream too! So how about you eat these pancakes, and I will help you get ready and we can go to the store.”
Since my body has gotten weaker, I have had to use a wheelchair when we go places. I used to hate going to the store, but now I loved it because I sometimes saw people I knew and I was actually out of the house. I also got to ride around in my cool wheelchair and show it off. People by now knew I was sick, so I wasn’t embarrassed anymore.
“I want cookies and cream and peanut butter.”
“Just one flavor,”
Zoe demanded.
“Please, please, pretty please?” I begged. I wanted a few scoops of each. I put on my puppy dog face and looked her in the eye—the face she could never say no to. I had some tricks she hasn’t caught onto yet.
“Just one. How about cookies and cream, and you can get peanut butter cups to go on top?”
“Ok, I guess.” I stopped arguing. That did sound really good.
The next aisle had all the candy. I didn’t know how to pick what I wanted! I could go with what she said, but there was just so much!
“Don’t go anywhere. I have to go grab a basket really quick so we can carry everything.”
“Ok, I need to decide anyways.”
“Good! Don’t move!” she insisted. I don’t know where she thinks I would go, though.
I stared at the candy. There were mini peanut butter cups, gummy bears, chocolate chips, marshmallows—it was never ending. How was I ever going to choose? I wanted it all. But I knew Zoe wouldn’t let me get it all. I needed to have a healthy diet since I was so sick. I couldn’t push the treat she was allowing me to have. I decided I wanted the marshmallows. I tried to reach them, but I couldn’t from my wheelchair.
“Do you need help? Is this what you wanted? Here you go,” a man said handing me the candy.
“Thank you!” I placed the candy in my lap and looked up to see the man who helped me. “Oh! You’re…you’re…” I was so excited I couldn’t talk. I couldn't get the words out of my mouth, I was so surprised.
“I’m Christian Michaels! Nice to meet you.” He said shaking my hand. “I see you like Siena basketball?”
“Yes! I am your biggest fan! See? I am even wearing your shirt!” I unzipped my jacket to show him. He was even taller in person, but he bent down to his knees to level with me.
“What are you buying?” He asked.
“Toppings. My sister is treating me to ice cream sundaes today, and I get to pick anything I want to put on it. She just went to get a basket. You have to meet her! She actually goes to Siena. She won’t believe me unless you stay. Please? She will be right back!”
I wanted Zoe to meet him. Maybe I could invite him over to have ice cream with us. I couldn’t believe I just met Christian Michaels.
“Gabe, are you okay?” Zoe shouted from down the aisle. His back was to her, so she was probably making sure no stranger was being mean to me. She got nervous like that sometimes.
“Look who it is!” I yelled. Christian stood up and turned around.
“Zoe?” Christian stuttered.
I curled my lips in and my eyebrows sank into my skin. I thought to myself, “how did Christian know my sister’s name?” She didn’t tell me she knew him!
“How are you feeling? Sorry about last night,” Christian said.
“How did he know you were sick?” I asked out loud. “You’re friends with him and never told me? How could you? Wait. Is this your secret?” I whispered.
“I was supposed to take your sister out last night,” Christian replied to Gabe.
“I’m sorry, but we have to get going,” Zoe said in a weird tone. I don’t know why she wanted to leave so quickly. Didn’t she know who we were talking to?
“But wait! If you were supposed to hang out last night, maybe he can come over today since you are feeling better!”
“That’s not a good idea,” Zoe replied quickly and put her hands on the back of my wheelchair to push me away.
“Why not?” I asked, looking up at her.
“Yeah, why not?” Christian agreed. He was smirking and gave me a wink.
“I…I…” Zoe hesitated.
“I can come over and bring more toppings for those sundaes! I was actually about to buy some peanut butter ice cream too, so you will have two flavors to choose from.” Christian added.
“Oh my God! I wanted that flavor too! Zoe, can he please come? Pretty, pretty please?” I whined. When I started to whine, Zoe always gave in, especially if we were in public. She didn’t want to make a scene.
“I don’t know. He’s probably busy.”
“I’m not. I have no plans today, actually,” he replied.
“See?” I said, trying to get a response out of Zoe.
Zoe stared at Christian for a while before finally agreeing and giving him our address. Wow! Today is going to be so much fun. I can’t believe Christian Michaels will be coming over to my house! For a moment I forgot my body had even been aching today. I forgot how sick I was. This was like a dream come true. The person I’ve dreamed about being when I’m older was going to be hanging out with me.
How could Zoe not tell me she was friends with him?
{14}
Zoe
Gabe didn't stop talking the entire car ride home from the store. I would be naive to say that I wasn't expecting him to act this way. Was it selfish of me for trying to avoid this? As much as I loved seeing Gabe this animated, I was trying to prevent the inevitable from happening. If Christian left our lives, it would destroy Gabe. He didn't seem like the type of guy to want to be involved in the kind of life I lived.
Watching out the window, I stared blankly out at the driveway. He texted me a few minutes ago to let me know that he was on his way. I had no idea what to expect out of tonight. I panicked.
“Gabe, I’m going upstairs for a minute. If he gets here, let him in?”
“Of course!” Gabe shouted excitedly. He hadn’t left the living room since we got home.
I ran upstairs to my bathroom. Gripping both sides of the sink, I looked down and closed my eyes. Taking a few deep breaths, I looked up into the mirror.
“Tonight is going to go fine. It’s going to be okay. It’s just a movie and ice cream. Gabe is here. We aren’t alone. It’s going to go great. Everything is going to be fine.” I was talking to myself hoping that I could talk myself out of the nervousness. Panic attacks had become more frequent because of my lack of sleep and the stress I have been under.
Daddy, I wish you were here. Is Christian a good guy? Would you approve? Is he the guy you once told me would come into my life and sweep me off my feet? I need answers.
I couldn’t stop thinking about how my dad would act if he were still here. Thoughts like if he would approve of a guy coming over, if he would ask him a million questions, or what age he would have allowed me to first date.
Then I thought, How would my mom be acting? Would I tell her everything? Would I tell her how I felt about him? I envied some of my friends for the relationships they had with their parents and for the things their parents were around to see and watch as they grew up.
The doorbell rang.
I stood at the top of the stairs, listening to the conversation below me.
“So what movie are we watching tonight?” Christian asked Gabe as he walked through the door.
“I’m not sure yet. I figured since you were our guest you could pick!” He lowered his voice and continued, “Zoe told me to say that.”
“How about we let your sister pick?”
“I’m not too sure about that one. She can never make up her mind, and well, if we let her pick, we will probably be stuck here watching some girly movie.”
“Oh, you know, that’s a very good point you make.”
“Yeah, don’t want to get stuck watching those with her!”
“Well, you’re in luck. I did bring a few movies I thought you might want to watch. Where is your sister, anyway?”
“Zoe! Christian is here!” Gabe shouted from downstairs. “Now she’ll come quickly,” he said to Christian, not realizing I could hear their entire conversation.
I waited a few moments before heading down the stairs so I wouldn’t seem too anxious. Looking down, I saw Christian sitting there close to Gabe showing him a selection of movies. He seemed to get more attractive every time I saw him. That, or I was starting to fall for him. The two of them were smiling, and this was the happiest I have seen Gabe in a very long time.
Maybe Christian was a good guy after all?
I stood up, horrified.
“Are you okay?” Christian asked, barely able to get the words out from laughing so hard with Gabe.
“Yes. We really need to get a rug on those stairs. They’re really slick, especially with socks on.” Christian looked down, noticing my fuzzy Yankee socks I had put on.
“There’s so much we need to do in this house. I have to add that to the top of the list,” I added.
“This is a beautiful house! What do your parents do for a living?” Christian asked.
Before I could say anything Gabe spoke up quickly. “My daddy’s in heaven, and we don’t know where my mom is.” A pit arose in my stomach.
Christian looked over at me with a glimmer of sadness on his face and turned back to Gabe.
“Well, you have an amazing sister who I’m sure takes great care of you!”
“She does everything for me,” Gabe responded, and I knew Christian was starting to see a little bit of what my life was like.
“So I brought a few movies. Gabe said you would pick out a bad movie, so looks like you will just have to settle for something we choose. Right, Gabe?” Christian said with a smirk, changing the subject.
Gabe laughed. “Yeah, Zoe, we don’t want to watch a girly movie.”
“Okay, okay, guys. I guess I will have to settle for your choice.”
“I was thinking Home Alone? It’s one of my favorites,” Christian suggested.
“That is a great movie,” I agreed while looking over to Gabe to see what he thought.
“I haven’t ever seen it before!” He picked it up and looked at the case.
“What! Is your sister depriving you?”
“Yeah, Zoe, stop depriving me. What does depriving mean?”
“Okay, you two, I see you have teamed up against me already! What’s up with that?”