He runs his fingers through my hair as I wipe my eyes. I’m not going to cry but that has to be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.
“I’ve been scared to close my eyes and fall asleep because I don’t want to have nightmares about him,” I say as he comforts me.
“And you think that’s what’s going to happen?” I nod against his warm skin. “If it did, I’d be right here beside you to hold you.”
“I know that, and that scares me too.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I don’t want to confuse my feelings for you. I don’t want to become dependent on you to help me through bad times. If everything works out for us, it has to be because we both want it.”
He kisses me on the head and I know he understands what I’m trying to say, even though I’m struggling to say the words. “Let’s try and get some sleep.”
“Okay.”
“You look gorgeous,” says Connor as I enter the kitchen. He doesn’t look so bad himself considering neither of us got a great amount of sleep. He stands there in a pair of worn jeans and a white shirt that’s turned up at the sleeves. His hair is messy perfection and I wouldn’t have it any other way. “Are you ready for today?”
“Yes. I’m looking forward to this. What about you?”
“Of course I am. I’m spending more time with a beautiful woman and I’m finding out all about the charity you want to help. What more could a man want?” I blush and smooth down my cream dress, thinking maybe I’m a bit over-dressed for today’s meeting now that I see him.
I walk towards him as he leans against the sink. “Thank you and sorry,” I say, pressing my lips to his. “And I’m glad you’ll be there today.”
“Well, I do have to keep an eye on you and make sure you’re okay.”
“I’m sure between you and my dear dad today, I won’t get a minute on my own.”
“As it should be. How are you feeling?”
“I’m actually really good and I’ve come to a few decisions.”
He wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him. “And what are those?”
“Firstly, Trevor has emailed. I’ve been offered the part in the movie. Filming doesn’t start for a few months and it’s being shot between L.A and London.”
He smiles at me. He already knows what I’m going to say. “You’re accepting then?”
“Yes. I’d be foolish not to, especially when I already know the producers here in Scotland are prepared to work around my schedule. I’m not going to allow Donovan to hold me back from doing the job I’m passionate about.”
“Glad to hear it. You need this, just as I need . . .” He stops talking, not wanting to finish what he was saying, but he doesn’t have to. You. The single word he hasn’t said hangs in the air between us. He needs me.
And I’m starting to realise I need him too, but I want him more. My thoughts on every part of my life are mixed up, but I know for sure that my feelings for Connor Andrews are deepening with each passing day. Yet, still I feel confused.
“Stop thinking and just kiss me already.”
“Pretty sure of yourself, aren’t you?”
“Of course, and why shouldn’t I be? You’ve already seen all I have to offer.”
I stifle a laugh. “I’ve seen your package.” I cover my mouth with my hand in both embarrassment and amusement. He laughs and I’m sure my face is red.
“Yes, and I’ve had no complaints,” he says, leaning his head forward. His mouth is as close as it can be without touching.
“No complaints, huh? I’m sure I can find something to complain about.”
“I bet you can’t. You have bagged yourself some hot property, if I do say so myself.”
Oh, please. I grab his face, pulling his lips to mine, and cover his mouth, silencing him before he speaks again. His tongue traces the soft fullness of my lips before reclaiming them, crushing his mouth to mine, more demanding than before. I melt against not just his kiss, but his body.
I’m home.
I’m where I belong.
And the funny thing is, my thoughts don’t frighten me.
“Babe, we need to go or we’ll be late. And as much as I’m loving this kiss, I don’t want to be the one to ruin your plans.” His voice whispers against my lips as he pulls back from me, leaving me longing for more.
“You look so much better than you did last night,” my dad says, embracing me as soon as we exit my car.
“I’m feeling better. Honestly,” I tell him. It was late by the time everyone left. I felt as though the police officers were at my house for hours questioning me. God, at one point I even thought I was the criminal.
“Okay, then let’s get inside and see what we’re dealing with. After this, meeting we’ll go for lunch and I’ll tell you how things went with Jonathon.” I had forgotten, or conveniently pushed to the back of my mind, that Dad was meeting with our lawyer this morning about Donovan.
Turning my concentration to now, the three of us walk toward the building, ready and eager to find out what we can do to help the charity.
“Good afternoon, Miss McGregor. It’s lovely to finally meet you. I’m Michelle.” The woman before me shakes my hand.
“Please, just Ella. This is my dad, Archie, and this is Connor.”
“Pleased to meet you. Let’s go to my office and I can tell you all about our charity and then you can meet some of the staff and volunteers who regularly help out at shelters across the city and on the streets at night.”
A shiver runs through me with her last words and my thoughts drift back to the man from a few weeks ago, wondering how he is. Did he get the job he was going for? I hope so.
We sit down in her office and wait for her to start talking.
“We are a charity organisation that works to alleviate the distress caused by homelessness and bad housing. We do this by giving advice, information, and advocacy to people in housing need, and by campaigning to end the housing crisis our country faces for good. As a charity, we can’t provide homes, but we can provide all the help and support people need with housing problems. We are the lifeline some people need in order to get their lives back on track.”
“We also work alongside local councils and social care departments, and other charity organisations. I can show you our reports and achievements and tell you what we hope to achieve this year.”
“So I can clarify, you help not just those on the streets, but those who find themselves in poor accommodation?” Dad asks.
“Yes, and you’d be surprised at how bad some conditions are. I’m personally working alongside a young mum with two young girls who, through no fault of their own, lost everything after her partner died. Some of the stories are tragic.”
We spend over an hour talking in her office, hearing about everything the charity does. From helping with housing issues, to finding a homeless person a bed for a night in a shelter, which we’re told there aren’t enough of, to providing hot food and drinks, to providing men and women on the streets with basic everyday essentials. All the things I take for granted. It’s heart-breaking to hear.
In today’s society, people shouldn’t be living on the streets, relying on hand-outs from passers-by. We meet some volunteers who are getting organised to go to local soup kitchens where they can provide hot meals and advice, should anyone want it. We learn that the local authority is working with the charity and opens up some community centres that would be closed at night.
The advice and information given is different to each individual, but can include help with jobs, housing, benefits, and even advice for alcoholics and drug users.
We’re back in Michelle’s office, talking about a TV campaign she would like me to front, and I have no hesitation in backing this. I wanted to help before I came here today, but now, after hearing all the stories, I want to help more than ever.
“Michelle, I’d like to make a donation today,” my dad says, taking her by surprise.
“Oh, ok
ay,” she says flustered. “I’m sure we can organise this.”
“You’ll have to provide me with details so I can arrange with my bank manager.” The minute he says that, I look at him and he smiles. “I’d like to boost your funds by giving you a sizable amount of money.”
“Erm, I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything. The facts you’re telling us are almost unbelievable. To think that in this day and age we still can’t combat the homeless issue. I’m hoping my donation of five hundred thousand will help.”
“Wow, bloody hell. All my professionalism has just left me.” I laugh at her honest evaluation of herself. Trust my dad. “Archie, that is very kind. I can’t wait to report back to the board about this.”
“Michelle, I understand you have to report to the board, but I’d appreciate it if my name stays out of the media. As far as anyone else is concerned, this will be an anonymous donation.”
“If that is your wish, of course. But I’d love to be able to keep you updated on where and who it helps the most.”
Our meeting continues and we discuss the advertising campaign the company wants me to head, and I’m more than happy to do so, but it doesn’t seem enough. “Michelle, I’d also like to offer my services for anything I can help with.”
“Ella, you are already doing enough. Just having your name linked with us will bring in more money to help more people.”
“Yes, I know, but I’d like to help.”
“We never turn volunteers away so we happily accept. I understand you’ll have a busy schedule, but I’m more than happy to give you more details.”
“Yes, please.” After discussing finer details for the advertisement I’m to be a part of, we leave Michelle after she thanks us all for today.
“Well, that went well, don’t you think?” Dad asks as we stand in the car park.
“Yes, it did.” Today went better than expected and I’m pleased to be able to do my bit for a charity that helps so many.
“Now that I’ve made Michelle’s day, let’s get to the restaurant and I’ll make your day too, by telling you all about my meeting with Jonathon.” He gets in his own car after telling us which restaurant to meet him at.
“Archie McGregor is full of surprises,” Connor says, sliding into the driver’s seat of my car.
“Yes, he is.” What he did was something my mum would’ve done had she been here.
THE LAST FEW DAYS HAVE been quiet concerning Donovan. There’s been no contact from him and I’m glad. Jonathon found out he’s still in the UK; he’s staying at the Savoy in London. How can a man who is broke pay for fancy hotels? I can only presume his new girlfriend is paying for it, because Katherine Hunter is still in the UK too. I took out an injunction against him, and I’m glad because if he does get in touch or attempt to come near me, then the police can do something about it.
It’s given me some sort of peace of mind.
After Callum told me that my story was very much in the news across the Atlantic, I did some digging and called a few friends. It would seem Donovan hasn’t been the first to abuse his position. But no one else has come out and made an allegation of fraud or anything else for that matter. There are lots of rumours flying around Hollywood, except my story; that’s the truth.
One of the chat shows in L.A. wants to do a live interview with me. I told them I’m more than happy to but I won’t be back in the States for a few months when filming starts. They said they were happy to do a live link to talk through what Donovan did to me. The chat show host wants everyone to know so, as she said, no-one else falls victim to him.
Julie was here last night for dinner and a catch-up. She’s just getting over the cold, but I was missing her. Connor didn’t come home until late; he’d been in meetings all day with Trevor, so Julie and I had a few drinks, a takeaway, and plenty of laughs.
She commented more than once about how relaxed I seemed. And she’s right; I am more relaxed. The last few days have shown me who I should be. I can have days or moments when I’m weak, as long as my strength shines through, and it has.
It’s Friday evening and Connor has called to say he’s on his way home. I’m desperate to see him. He left before eight this morning and today has been the first day this week where I’ve had nowhere to go. I’ve done absolutely nothing except read. Well, that’s not true; I’ve showered and put on clean PJs. I used to read a lot, but over the last few years there’s always been something or someone to stop me.
The noise of my car stopping in the drive outside has my attention. Connor has been saying for the last few days he’ll need to get his own car, but I told him at the moment he doesn’t need to. There are two cars in my drive; one usually sits doing nothing for months.
“Honey, I’m home,” he calls out, making me giggle and lift my head from my book. “Where are you?”
“I’m in the front room.”
“Have you even got dressed today?” he asks, looking at me lying on the couch.
“Yes. I even had a shower.” He laughs. “What’s wrong?” I ask with concern as I finally take in his tired appearance.
“I’ve got a bit of a sore head and throat.”
I sit up and put my book down and he joins me on the couch. “Do you need me to do anything for you?”
“I can think of one or two things,” he says, grinning. “I’m sure that would make me feel better.”
“I’m not so sure. Maybe you should go to bed on your own and get plenty of rest.” He pushes me back down on the couch and starts tickling me. “Stop,” I cry out.
“No,” he laughs, winking at me. “You seem to be enjoying it.”
I throw my arms around him, wrapping him in a tight embrace in the hope he stops his ongoing tickling assault. I feel as though I’ve waited all day to see him and, now that he’s here on top of me, I want him.
“Please, Connor. Stop, I can’t take any more.”
He finally stops, but keeps me in his arms. “I’ve missed you,” he whispers against my lips. Lips that are now desperate for his touch. We spend what seems like minutes gazing into each other’s eyes before his lips finally fall to mine.
I’m where I want to be, in the arms of my sexy man with his mouth on mine. Yes, I’m in heaven.
I moan, running my hands through his hair as we deepen the kiss. Tongues dance, lapping and circling slowly. This kiss is full of the dreamy intimacy I was reading about in my book, the kind of kiss every woman should have at least once in their lives. I’ve felt like this with every kiss we’ve shared.
Releasing my mouth, he sits back on his heels, leaving me hot and bothered and craving more. He looks down through his hooded eyes; I can still see he looks tired but he’s decided that this is more important than sleep. He’s deep in thought and I wish I knew what he was thinking.
He lifts my pyjama top, pulls it over my head, and discards it on the floor. A warm hand cups my breast and my eyes fall closed as he pays special attention to it. The gentle massage sends currents of desire through me. He rubs my nipple between his fingers and I moan softly from the warm sensation that floods through my veins before turning his attention to my other breast and repeating his actions. His touch is light and teasing.
My body writhes beneath him from his touch. I open my eyes and he’s watching me intently, his lips still moist from our kiss. He removes his t-shirt, pulling it over his head and throwing it down on the floor beside mine and then loosens the buttons on his jeans.
Where the hell is he going? I almost whimper as he stands up and I watch as he kicks off his shoes. Slowly, he lowers the jeans and his boxers before removing them completely, allowing me a moment to worship my man. I clench my legs together to alleviate the building tension. There’s no doubt he’s a fine specimen of a man as he stands before me, completely naked.
Connor takes a step toward me and lowers his hands, finding the waistband of my shorts before quickly removing them and they join the pile of discarded clothes on t
he floor.
He crawls slowly back on the couch, parting my legs, exploring my thighs then moving slowly up. My eyes close when he runs his tongue along my clit. I cry out when he plunges his tongue deep inside me before pulling out and doing it again.
Dear God.
His hands reach out, grabbing my hips, trying to hold me in place, but it’s no use. My hips are rotating to meet him, seeking further friction. Wanting more. He lifts his mouth and all I feel is cool air where I want to feel him. I know if I open my eyes, I’m going to see him staring at me with amusement on his face as I wait impatiently on him returning to the torturous pleasurable task in hand.
I don’t open my eyes; I silently pray that he continues.
And he does, increasing the pressure. I grab onto the couch and push my hips closer to him. My body begins to vibrate with liquid fire as the intensity builds, heating through my body. I arch my back, needing more pressure, more him, more everything. His tongue leaves me briefly before plunging deep back into me. Gusts of desire flood through me. I explode around him and an uncontrollable joy fills me.
Opening my eyes, I see a satisfied Connor Andrews staring lovingly up at me. He kisses his way up body until he finds my lips. Brushing his soft lips over mine, I taste myself as he gazes down at me through hooded, dark eyes. I take hold of his shoulders as I feel his erection thump lightly against me.
He lifts his body and, with his eyes still on me, he drives into me in one fluid motion. I whimper, every muscle clenching around him tightly.
I need to feel more.
Moving my legs, I wrap them around his waist, pulling him closer to me. Slowly, he withdraws, and instantly I miss what we share, before he drives back in forcefully, his eyes still fixed on me.
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