by A. G. Wilde
He was going to miss all of that.
But there was no other choice.
As the sense of loss descended upon him, he accepted it.
It wasn’t the first time he would feel such loss. He’d been feeling it ever since the reality of his future had been set upon him as a young Vorti.
Loss was embedded in his life.
There was no way to escape it apart from destroying the Tasqals and rewriting how his people were perceived across the galaxy.
A monumental task.
She was in the washing area for far longer than usual and he understood why.
He’d give her all the time and space that she needed.
It shouldn’t be hard for him to move on once she was gone. He’d already been trying to keep his distance. This was just another level to that.
Kyro forced the thoughts to run through his mind, repeating them over and over again.
She had no ties to him. No feelings for him that held any gravity. No reason to falter in her decision.
Kyro took a deep breath, grimacing slightly as the new skin that was forming stretched over the wound. As his body settled back down, Evren walked into the room, her footsteps halting.
She caught his attention and not in the usual way. This time, there was something different about her, a strange look covering her smooth features as she walked back over to him.
Confused, he tracked her as she walked around to the other side of the sleeping area. As she climbed atop the bedding, crawling over to him on all fours till she was beside him, she settled back on her legs, sitting on them.
Replacing the wet oofla cloth on his forehead, she stared down at him.
Something about the way she was looking at him was making his pulse begin to quicken.
“Ev—”
“Shh.” One of her fingers was suddenly pressing down on his lips—a human action that should not have halted the words coming from his mouth but somehow, he found he could not speak.
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this whole experience—you know...getting abducted, almost killed, almost raped—is that life is short.”
Immediately, a little ball of hope began to form deep in his bowels, and he knew he should stuff it back down and forget about it. Even as he dared not to hope, he could feel his pulse quickening, his lifeblood running through his veins at increasing speed.
“I don’t want to stop living. I want to experience it all. And right now,” he realized too late that her gaze was fastened on his lips, and even as she finished what she was saying, his eyes widened when her head dipped.
“Right now, Kyro, I want to experience you.” Her words were just a whisper, gliding over his lips and causing a tingle before her soft lips touched his. “Just for one night, before we say goodbye, let me experience you.”
Her lips were the softest most supple thing he had ever had against his mouth and he found himself holding back a groan of appreciation as her skin pressed down on his.
It took everything in his power not to wrap his arms around her, flip her underneath him, and punish her for making him feel so good in the sweetest of ways.
He wanted to hear her cry his name, wanted to hear moans of ecstasy coming from these same soft lips as he claimed her, made her his, for the rest of eternity.
This kiss did not feel like goodbye. It felt like the start of much, much more things to come.
“This time, I don’t want you to sleep with me because I was having bad dreams. I want us to sleep together because I want to feel you there with me. I want to be with you.” Her words brushed against his lips like a soft feather and the groan he’d been holding back found its way vibrating from his throat as he finally gripped her and pulled her farther into him.
She wanted them to sleep together.
Pity she didn’t know; the last thing on his mind was sleeping.
Despite that logic was screaming for him to pull away, he held her tight.
Just one night and then they’d part ways.
One night.
“Will you do that for me? For us?”
Kyro gulped. How could he say no?
26
“Will you do that for me? For us?”
She’d really asked him to throw away caution and be with her?
For a second, she thought he would turn her down but as soon as she said the words, Kyro pulled her tighter against him.
Her breasts squashed against his chest as she stretched out over him. He felt so hard, the muscles underneath his skin so tight that she whimpered a little at how exquisite he felt.
She had never imagined just feeling her body against his would make her feel so good, as if her entire being was on high alert anticipating what was about to come next.
“Kyro...” Her murmur of his name had him groaning against her lips as he crushed his lips against hers, their kiss becoming more frantic by the second.
His tongue played with hers, making her eyes roll back in her head as butterflies that had laid dormant since her teens suddenly awakened and began dancing for the drug that was his lips.
“Kyro,” she breathed again when he finally released her. Their breathing was coming in harsh gasps and she couldn’t help but grin at him. “Wh-where did you learn to kiss like that?”
“Did I do it incorrectly?” His gaze fastened to her lips and she could see the heat growing within his eyes as he looked at her. “Should I try again?”
Without answering, she took his upper lip between her teeth for a harmless nibble and a yelp escaped her when his arms tightened around her frame and she was suddenly flipped, her back pressing into the bedding as Kyro braced himself over her.
His eyes were wild now—a look she’d never witnessed in them before—and his lips crashed on hers again.
His kiss was like chocolate ice cream after a hard day of work, making her want to put her legs up and roll her eyes back as his mouth melted into hers. As Kyro moved, pressing her down into the bedding, she realized she had lifted her legs, wrapping them around his torso and pulling him in farther.
As her eyes closed and she surrendered to her emotions, she could only feel. One of his hands caressed her cheek so gently even though his lips were so insistent, telling her that even though she was pinned beneath him, this was him practicing self-control and the thought thrilled her. A moan tumbled from her middle as his other hand slipped down her sides, to land at the juncture of her hips and her buttocks. He gripped her there, holding her firmly against him as his tongue delved into her mouth.
When she met his tongue with hers, his deep rumble vibrated against her and she felt him twitch in his trousers. That twitch made her moan again like a wanton woman. The promise of that twitch...fuck, it was making her wet.
She wanted this more than she’d even realized she did.
She wanted him to fuck her, give it to her deep, make her scream, make her feel again.
She wanted to come while she was screaming his name into the sheets, her ass in the air as he hammered into her from behind.
“Kyro,” she begged.
Her heart was beating so wildly she could hardly breathe. It was only she and him. Nothing else mattered at this moment.
Nothing.
No Tasqals. No past pain.
Kyro’s breath came hard and fast as he lifted his lips from hers.
“Evren, I can’t—”
Fear gripped her at those words, the world pausing and standing still for a moment as she waited for him to continue.
This was it.
He was going to tell her they couldn’t do this. That she was wrong to push him. That she was making things harder for them.
“I can’t stop.” Kyro gulped. “I can’t—”
“I don’t want you to stop.” Pressing a hand against his cheek, she looked deep into his eyes. “I don’t want you to stop,” she repeated.
His throat moved in a gulp. “Evren...”
“I want you, Kyro.” A small laugh bubbled within
her. “I think I need you...and I think you need me too.”
There was still hesitation on his part as he eased up farther off her, a deep hurt reflected in his eyes. Her own heart clenched as she watched him move.
“It does not feel right sharing this experience with you like this.” He motioned to himself. He was looking down at himself now, his eyes reflecting he was in deep thought.
It took a few seconds for her to get his meaning.
“Can you shift into the real you? The way you really look?” The thought made a tingle of excitement and anticipation run through her veins and she was pretty sure there were goosebumps all along her arms. His hesitation, however, made a ball of worry begin to form in her belly.
“Kyro?”
“You would still want to spend these last few moments with me if I don’t look like this?”
She didn’t understand what he was saying. Of course, she would still want to.
“This is the Kyro you know. You do not know Kh’Ziami Ch’Mora Ch’Anan.”
“What do you mean? Is that...is that your real name?”
His slight nod had her eyes growing larger.
“Say it again for me,” she whispered.
“Kh’Ziami,” he said. “Ch’Mora Ch’Anan.”
There were guttural sounds she wasn’t sure she could replicate but his name sounded...beautiful.
“Show me...” she whispered. “Show me who you really are...”
Kyro stiffened above her as his eyes searched hers.
He was hesitant.
Of course, he was.
What she had asked of him was something he had done for no one before.
She wanted to see him, wanted to see who he really was but most of all, in this brief moment that they would have together, she wanted him to feel loved and celebrated for his true self, not what he pretended to be.
He didn’t say a word, but he kept looking at her, his hesitation speaking volumes.
“Don’t be afraid,” she whispered. “You won’t scare me.”
“You seem so sure.”
“I am.”
Kyro tilted his head slightly, his gaze still searching hers. “You have no idea what my real appearance is. It could be...anything.”
She hadn’t thought about that. What if he looked like nightmare fuel? What if he had tentacles? Scales like a pangolin? Slimy like a slug?
He must have noticed her hesitation because he asked, “Are you scared?”
“No,” she steeled herself. “We must do this. For us.”
Searching her eyes some more, he bowed his head. “Very well.”
His head down, Evren stared at the top of his bald dome and waited, the tension and anxiety within her finally building to a level where she was starting to hear her pulse in her ears.
Waiting, she stared at him, her eyes roving over what she could see of his body. But he had gone silent. So silent, he wasn’t even moving.
“Kyro?” Mild panic set in. “Kyro, are you all right?”
His head moved in a slow nod but still he didn’t raise his gaze to hers.
“Are you changing?” she whispered. She still couldn’t see any changes.
Eyes focused on the dome of his head, she let her gaze wander down his spine towards the waist of his trousers.
Nope. No changes.
She was just about to call his name again when he lifted his head and looked at her.
She almost didn’t see it at first, but it was there. The skin all over his face was...shimmering? Yes, definitely. It was almost as if it was filled with small bioluminescent stars, like a whole galaxy was distributed in his skin cells. It was a dull shimmer, but it was there nonetheless and as her mouth fell open in an ‘O’, she realized that the shimmer was extending over his entire body.
Slowly, and it was almost as if she was imagining it happening, his head began to change. Instead of being mostly smooth on top, the bones of his cranium became slightly more pronounced, the frontal bone becoming more outlined.
Kyro’s throat moved as he watched her, and she could only look up at him with awe at just that one change.
“Continue?” he asked, a note of hesitation still there.
She realized then that he was doing it slowly for her benefit. He was scared of frightening her. But watching the change happen slowly like this was attracting her to him even more.
Swallowing hard, her wide eyes scoured his face looking for more changes as she nodded and answered a soft “yes.”
Kyro’s throat moved again.
As she stared at him, she saw the bridge of his nose begin to move. Instead of his bone straight nose, his bridge grew wider than it was before and by the sides of his head, his ears became pointier.
When that didn’t have her running through the door, he rose to kneel over her, just as his jawline became sharper and more pronounced. His skin now was also taking on a green tint, like the color of seaweed and there was a faint pattern all over him too. A pattern of swirls like an intricate tattoo underneath his skin.
Gray, slanted eyes now looked back at her as he paused, wariness in his gaze.
“Go on,” she whispered.
Down his chest, ridges formed around his muscles, only making them more pronounced.
Holding up one of his hands, he looked at it and drew her attention as his fingers morphed from five to three, a thumb and two large forefingers.
He stopped then, his hand falling to his side as he looked at her, his skin still shimmering.
“Is this you?” she whispered, raising herself on her elbows to look at him.
He was more handsome than she’d expected him to be. Even more handsome than his gray form. She wanted to touch him, feel him, but it was obvious he was still battling with his own emotions. “Is this the real you?”
Kyro nodded. “All that’s left of me,” he said. Turning the back of his hand, he ran a finger from his wrist down to his elbow. “My chets used to be here.”
“Chets? What are those?” She couldn’t believe she was speaking so normally because in her head it was like a bomb had just gone off. Even though her voice was so calm, she knew she was gaping at him, her mouth open, her eyes wide.
It’s that feeling when you become so shocked, it is too much for your mind to comprehend and you are stunned to calmness.
He seemed to be thinking of a way to describe what he’d referred to because his eyes grew distant for a minute. “Like blades, sharpened bone. For protection. Defense.”
“Ah.” She nodded. “Why are they not there anymore?”
He didn’t answer immediately, and it seemed as if he wasn’t going to. “Vorti remove their chets when hiding, to not give ourselves away. Chets tend to rise on their own when we are provoked. It is a distinct characteristic that would make anyone know we are not whatever we assimilate to be.”
“You had to mutilate yourself?” She couldn’t help the horror that reflected in her eyes. It was like pulling one’s own fingernails out. She couldn’t imagine how painful that must have been. “Do they grow back?”
“For some.” A sad smile moved briefly over his lips. “Mine just haven’t had a reason to.”
Evren took his words in stride before turning her attention back to him. It was strange looking at him. The only thing that told her she was looking at Kyro was his eyes. He had the same gray eyes.
The same eyes that were in the skunkat and the same eyes in the gray body he’d projected. Those same eyes were looking at her now from a completely different body.
“How do you do this? I still… I’m looking at you but it still seems impossible,” she murmured.
She watched his throat move. He still seemed hesitant…guarded.
“My skin,” he started, “has light-sensitive cells that can change pigment.” He paused. “I can copy. Camouflage.” As if to demonstrate, he changed his skin to match her complexion. The change was so sudden, her eyes bugged out.
When he changed back, she blinked at him. My God.
“Go on,” she whispered.
But he paused once more, searching her face as if he believed she’d shrink away with each word he said.
“Go on, I want to know.”
Kyro’s throat moved again.
“My bones, my cells…I can make myself smaller. Bigger,” he said.
“Just by thought?”
He nodded. “Just by thought.”
It should be nerve-wracking but, instead, she couldn’t help but stare at him in awe.
He let her look at him, allowing her to take in her eyeful before she noticed he began changing back, the gray slowly creeping in.
“Wh-why are you changing back?”
“Do you not prefer the Kyro you know? I have not seen myself, my true self, in decades. I do not expect you to accept me.”
“Oh, Kyro.” She rose and wrapped her arms around his neck. Planting her lips against his, she sucked his bottom lip into her mouth, closing her eyes as she did so. “Don’t change back unless you want to. I would love for you to remain like this, your true self. But I won’t force you to. It’s ultimately your decision. I’ll be here either way.” She smiled, burying her face into his neck. His unique pine scent was even stronger now that he was in his original form.
A growl rumbled through his body and then they were falling back into the bedding.
“Evren,” he groaned, her name coming out as if he was experiencing some deep emotional ache.
“Kyro?”
Her arms were untangled from his neck in an instant they were pinned above her head. With one movement, his lips were on hers again, ravishing her and making a moan tumble from her lips unto his.
When she finally got the chance to look at him, she realized he hadn’t changed back. He’d remained in his true form.
His message was clear.
For this moment they had together, he was going to be with her wholly.
It was a gift she hadn’t expected to get but one that told her that after tonight, leaving him would be one of the hardest things she ever did in her entire existence.
“Hello, Kh’Ziami Ch’Mora Ch’Anan.”