“No. We’ll go together,” she insisted. She wasn’t about to remain behind while he went in search of trouble.
“You’re daft if you think I’m going to take you into harm’s way. You’ll stay, and that’s that.”
“Is it? And what’s to stop me from following you, after you’ve gone?” She knew, even if he wouldn’t admit it, that Strathland was foremost in Paul’s mind. He fully intended to avenge what had happened to her. “You’re not thinking clearly,” she said softly. “You’re acting on instinct instead of logic.”
“I willna hide from him, Juliette. He’s hurt everyone I love, and I’ll no’ hide away outside of Edinburgh while he threatens my family.”
She stilled, realizing what he’d said. Everyone I love.
Did he love her, then? He’d never said it, though she’d suspected as much. The word dug into her heart, for the look in his eyes gave her the truth.
He did love her. And because of it, he was planning to walk directly into danger, to ensure that Strathland never again hurt any of them. As he’d said, he wouldn’t hide.
But that was what she was doing, wasn’t she? Hiding away in this house, running from the man who had taken so much.
“What will you do when you confront him, Paul?”
He stared back at her, his eyes full of hatred and frustration. “I’m going to kill him.”
Her breath exhaled in a rush, for that was what she’d feared. “And when you’re caught? What then?”
“I don’t care what happens to me. He deserves death for what he did to you. A thousand times over. And if I’m the one to bring him to justice, it means that he canna ever hurt anyone again.”
“I would care what happens to you.” She took his hand in hers and drew it to her face. “Do you think I want to be a widow?”
He shook his head and shrugged. “I’m hardly much of a husband to you, as it is.”
“You’re right,” she said suddenly. His gaze narrowed, as if he’d never expected her to say it. “It isn’t much of a marriage. You sleep apart from me, and we only see one another at mealtimes.”
“That was the marriage you wanted,” he pointed out. “Or did you forget that we can no’ be sharing more than that?”
“We could, if you weren’t so afraid.”
“It wouldna take much for me to go over the edge, Juliette.” His hand curled against the back of her neck, and goose bumps rose over her skin. He wanted her badly, and she intended to ease the ache inside of him.
Juliette crossed back to the window and drew the drapes shut. “Lock the door.”
The room was dark, the air charged with anticipation. She wasn’t afraid of him, and knowing that their marriage would never be consummated had given her a boldness she’d never expected. He was wound up so tightly, she suspected that if she didn’t find a way to satiate his desires, their lives would break apart.
Her sister had given her a few ideas. And although they were shocking, Juliette wanted to touch her husband. She wanted to see him come apart, feeling the intense pleasure that he’d given her.
“What are you wanting, Juliette?” he demanded.
“Lock it,” she repeated. “I’m wanting some time with my husband. Before he goes off like a hot-tempered lad, to fight an enemy who’s not worth the mud on the ground.” She had his full attention, but he still hadn’t locked the door. So she went and did it for him, taking the key away.
“Juliette, don’t be starting something we canna finish.”
She set the key down and approached him, resting her hands upon his heart. “Will you ever stop talking?”
His eyes grew hooded, and she ran her hands up his spine, watching the way his muscles tightened. It was like trying to melt a stone, and she turned around in his arms. “You left me, the first night we were together. And I never had the chance to touch you the way I wanted to.”
There seemed to be a desperate hunger raging within him with every touch of her hands. When she removed his coat, he reached for the back of her gown. Juliette held her breath, hoping he would like the undergarments she’d chosen. Her sister had promised that Paul would appreciate them.
“How were you wanting to touch me?” he asked.
“The way a wife does. The way that pleases you,” she said, lifting her mouth up to be kissed. His hands were rapidly unfastening the buttons, his kiss turning hotter. She stood on her tiptoes, welcoming the feeling of his hands upon her. When she loosened his shirt and lifted it over his head, her palms went to touch his bare skin. She broke the kiss and moved her lips to his chest, swirling her tongue over his skin. He tore out the pins in her hair, letting it fall to her shoulders.
“Take off the gown,” he ordered, and she lifted it away. When he saw the gauzy material of her chemise and the emerald corset, he reached out to touch the silken fabric. The corset supported her breasts, but the sheer chemise revealed every curve.
“Where did you get this?” he demanded.
“From my sister.”
“God bless her.” He started to unlace it, but Juliette stopped him.
“Not yet.” She led him over to the desk and bade him stand against it. This wasn’t about her—she wanted to learn about his body and what he desired. She reached for his waist and drew her hands around him. His face was unreadable, and when she touched the first button of his trousers, his hands covered hers.
“I don’t like seeing you this way,” she murmured. “You’re unhappy and avoiding me.” Her hands were trembling on the first trouser button. She knew what her sister had told her to do, but fear held her back. She didn’t know if he would want her to touch him in that way or if it would please him the way Victoria had said it would.
He held her gaze in his and opened the first button. “I’m not unhappy at all.”
“Aren’t you?” She opened the second button, and his hard length both intrigued her and terrified her.
“You’re doing a fine job of arousing me.” His mouth curved into a wicked smile. “But then, I suppose you know that.”
“May I… touch you, then?”
“Aye.” His eyes held unbridled lust as he finished helping her unbutton his trousers. He removed his drawers, standing naked before her. Instinct roared at her to be afraid, but this was different than the night she’d been violated. This man was her husband, a man who loved her. He was offering himself without any barriers at all.
And she held all the power over him.
Her hands trailed downward, to touch his hardened flesh. He was smooth and warm, a column of heat. From the moment her hand curled around him, he drew her close, inhaling sharply. She was dimly aware that he was loosening her stays, but she was too fascinated by him. Slowly, she moved her hand against his shaft and was rewarded with a bead of moisture on the tip.
“Lift up your hands,” he ordered. When she obeyed, he removed the corset and swiftly stripped away the chemise. Though the room was dark, she was self-conscious of being bare before him. The last time had been safely beneath the covers.
“God above, I could kneel before you and worship,” he said roughly. He didn’t ask permission but bent his head and took her breast into his mouth. She shuddered at the wet heat, bending and yielding against the onslaught.
Each time he touched her, it was easier. He was kissing her with reverence, arousing the needs she’d never known were there. As he suckled her, she reached out to him again, caressing his length with her hand. He pulled her to him, so that he was cradled against her petticoat between her legs.
“Wait,” she murmured. “I wanted this to be about you. I wanted to please you.”
“A chrìdhe, don’t you know that touching you pleases me?” His gaze turned heated. “I could do this all day. And before I leave in the morning, I’m wanting you to remember this. Remember what it was between us.”
He spoke as if he didn’t plan to return, and her bones went cold at the thought. “I’ll remember it because you’re coming back to me,” she insisted.
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When he didn’t answer, the coldness turned to ice. “Paul, you are coming back.”
“I might.” But the tone of his voice sounded unconvinced. “But that doesna matter. You have this house, and you’re wise enough to mind the accounts. You’ll always be taken care of. Safe.”
“You’re not going to leave me a widow,” she commanded. “Look at me, Paul. I don’t care what Strathland did to us. If I can put it in the past, so can you.”
The words struck hard, for she realized they were true. She did want to move forward, to erase all the shadows.
She touched his face with both hands, drawing his mouth to hers. He kissed her with fervor, his hands moving everywhere. She removed her petticoat and stockings until she stood fully naked before him.
Although the door was locked, there was a sense of danger, almost as if anyone could walk in on them. Against the far wall was a small velvet settee.
She took his hand and led him toward it. He started to guide her down, but she shook her head. “You lie down first.”
He obeyed, and she ran her hands over him. Touching every hard line of muscle, learning where his skin was softer. And when her hand brushed against his erection, he gave an audible intake of breath.
She studied him, wondering what he would like. He’d enjoyed it when she’d touched him, and she did so again, exploring the hard ridge and the soft sac that hung below. His fingers dug into the velvet, but he spoke not a word.
Although he looked as if he were in pain, not once did he tell her to stop. Instead, he leaned into her touch, increasing the pressure.
She lowered her mouth to his heart, and her bare breasts pressed against him. He surged forward between them, and she thought of how wonderful his mouth had felt upon her nipples. Would he… want her to kiss him as well?
She moved to his nipple and licked at it, watching the way he responded. His hands slid into her hair, and he pushed her lower.
Juliette kissed at his stomach, her hands caressing his ribs and moving to his legs. Paul surrendered to her touch, letting her do as she wished, and she reveled in the complete control. He would not force her to do anything—all of it was her choice.
Lower still, and his erection brushed against her cheek. She wasn’t certain if he would want her to do this, but she brushed her mouth against the side of his length.
“God above, Juliette,” he gasped. “You’re killing me, lass.”
“Should I—should I stop?”
“I would die a happy man, just like this,” he admitted. “Don’t be stopping, unless you’re wanting to.” He reached down to touch her cheek. “I am yours to do with as you will.”
She cupped him with one hand and took the head of him into her mouth. His hands clenched into fists, and a dark groan spilled from him. “Christ in Heaven, aye. That’s it, love.”
It startled her to realize that pleasing him was deepening her own arousal. As she took him in her mouth, she was growing wetter, imagining him inside. She was stroking him in a rhythm, tasting the salt of him as he strained against her. And when she sucked against him, he abruptly lifted her away from him and laid her flat on her back, reversing their positions.
With his hands, he lifted her knees, kissing the flat of her stomach before moving to her inner thighs. “It’s my turn now, Juliette.”
His turn for what?
Ohhh… She nearly came apart when she felt him spread her apart, his tongue tasting her intimately. The fist of pleasure gripped her hard as he nibbled and tasted. “Do you like it, lass?”
She couldn’t grasp a single thought.
“You’re so wet,” he breathed against her. The vibration of his voice against her made her tremble. He explored her folds, licking and sucking until he found the nodule that made her cry out.
“Did I hurt you?”
“No. More of that, please,” she begged, guiding his mouth to her sensitive place. As he took her higher, he invaded her with his fingers. Over and over, he pressed the rhythm, until she was shivering, so close to the edge. She reached for his erection, fisting him in her hand at the same pace.
More. She needed him to give himself to her. Despite the erotic thrill of his touch, it still wasn’t enough. Keeping him tightly in her hand, she moved his hand away from her, and guided him inside.
He slid easily, with no pain. And when he was buried within her, he went motionless. “We can’t do this, Juliette.” He started to pull out, but she raised one leg over his waist and pulled him back. The sensation was every bit as wonderful as she’d imagined it would be. With Paul, there was no degradation. Lovemaking was a way of joining them together.
Her mind cried out that it was too grave of a risk. He could make her pregnant, and this time, a baby might end her life.
But was it any life at all, to live with a man she loved and not give him this part of her? She was his wife now, and she did love him. He was the man who had been there for her, all these years.
“I won’t risk you,” he said.
She locked her ankles around him, refusing to let him go. “You’re going to fight Strathland, aren’t you?”
He nodded, and when she moved against him, he shut his eyes, as if struggling for control.
“I don’t want you to die,” she whispered.
“And what do you think this is, Juliette? You said another child could kill you.”
“It’s a risk I’ll take. Especially if you’re planning to endanger your own life. If this is the last moment I’ll have with you, then I want this. No matter what the price.”
He opened his eyes, and the intensity of the blue mesmerized her. Inside her body, he was iron hard, his shaft fully sheathed within.
“Why?”
“Because I love you,” she whispered. “And I always have.” She relaxed the grip of her legs and pushed forward against him.
He pressed down upon her, using his arms to balance his weight. “There is a way… with less risk.” He was fighting against his words, and he gritted out, “If I don’t finish inside you.”
“Be with me,” she pleaded. “Give me this memory.”
Paul was lost. He wanted Juliette so badly, the slightest motion was going to send him over the edge. Her slick heat and the tightness of her body were clenched around his shaft. He was a selfish bastard for letting things get this far.
But in her eyes, he saw the mirror of his own feelings. “I love you, Juliette.” And he didn’t want her to sacrifice everything for this.
She began lifting her hips to him in gentle penetrations. Sweet and innocent, she was giving so much. And when her arousal shifted higher, her breath coming in short gasps, he lost it. His body took over with instinct, and he sank inside her.
Heaven. This had to be what Heaven was. Making love to the woman he’d adored ever since the moment he’d met her. She had her eyes closed, and he couldn’t resist lowering his mouth to her breast, teasing her nipple as he entered and withdrew.
“It feels good,” she breathed. “So good.”
Encouraged by her response, he took her nipple in deeper, shifting the rhythm of his penetration. In and out, he took her, watching to see when she pushed against him and when she hesitated.
“Faster?” he prompted, and she nodded, holding on to his hips. As he quickened the pace, her skin grew hotter. Perspiration rose upon her skin, and she moaned as he plunged inside.
She panted hard as he thrust, and when he lifted her bottom, changing the angle, she started to tremble violently. A harsh cry broke from her, and she shattered against him. White heat clenched him, and her release was all it took to make him withdraw fast, his seed spilling over her stomach.
Thank God he’d stopped in time.
He lay atop her, unable to believe what had just happened. Neither spoke, though he held her against him for long moments.
At last, he ventured, “Are you all right? I didna hurt you, did I?” He rolled to his side, searching her for a response.
“It was wonderful,�
� she whispered. He used a handkerchief to help clean her skin, and she moved her leg atop him, snuggling close. “Just as I imagined it would be.” She reached up to touch his cheek and lifted her mouth to his for a kiss.
He returned it, his hands moving over her soft skin. She was more beautiful to him than she’d ever been, with her hair tousled and her face flushed from their lovemaking.
“I love you,” he said, stroking down her back to her bottom. And he’d loved every moment. She had bound him to her intimately, and it gratified him to know that Strathland had never given her this. The only joy Juliette had known in joining with a man was with him.
Paul kissed her throat, moving lower to her breasts. With his mouth and tongue, he nipped at each, circling until he evoked another moan from her.
“I’m wanting to touch you like this for the rest of my life,” he admitted. “Explore every inch of your skin. I’ll ken what pleases you and what makes you sigh.”
He pressed a kiss against her shoulder, and she whispered, “You’re still going back, aren’t you?”
“I have to.” Though it was possible that the letter truly was from his mother, he doubted it. Regardless of the outcome, he needed to ensure that Bridget was safe. And that meant leaving Juliette behind.
He stroked her again, moving his hand across her thigh. She countered by pressing her palms against his chest. “I need to go with you,” she said quietly.
“No.” He wouldn’t bring her into the face of danger, not if Strathland was there. “I still think the letter was sent by the earl.”
“Had you thought that perhaps he’s trying to lure you away, so that I’m here alone?” She traced his bare skin with her hand, and her suggestion made him frown. No, he hadn’t considered that. Her theory held merit, clouding his decision to leave her.
“What if I’m not safe here?” she continued. “If he did send the letter, he must know where we are.”
Paul gave no answer, torn by the need to keep her safe, whether she stayed behind or came with him. Slowly, he sat up and helped her to get dressed before he donned his own clothing. “You’re right,” he said at last. “That may be his intention exactly.”
Unraveled By The Rebel Page 27