by Lyn Horner
Damn Frank Howard to Hell! he fumed. Then he immediately begged God’s forgiveness. The man had died by his hand; he oughtn’t to curse his soul, no matter how black he believed it to be.
“I reckon Judd will head back as soon as he gets the telegram,” Del said, drawing Tye’s attention. “He’ll want to take Frank home quick as he can.”
They stood waiting for David. He’d stayed behind to conclude things at the stockyard and make sure the crew didn’t get into a battle with the Howard bunch. Marshal Earp had ordered all of them to turn in their guns as per the town ordinance, but . . . .
“I’ll talk sense to Judd,” Del added. “He knew Frank was looking for trouble with you.”
“You really think he’ll care about that now?” Lil asked, pacing back to them. “I doubt he’ll even hear you out.”
Her eyes met Tye’s, and the fear in their depths rocked him to his core, forcing him to look away. He didn’t want her living with such all-consuming fear, not because of him. He knew all too well what that could do to her.
“Course he’ll hear me,” her father insisted. “We’ve been friends all our lives.”
Lil stared hard at him. “And if he doesn’t? Will you stand with Tye? Against Judd?”
Shock whitened Del’s leathery face. For a moment he returned Lil’s stare; then he gave a heavy sigh. “If it comes to that, yes.” His gray eyes shifted to Tye. “I’ll stand with you.”
“Against your best friend?” Tye couldn’t believe it.
Del bent his head. “You know, I lost my son in the war. Toby wasn’t my blood, but he might as well have been.” Catching Lil’s small, choked sound, he smiled sadly at her. “So I know how bad Judd’s gonna hurt, and I feel real bad for him. But if he takes his hurt out on you, he’ll be hurting Lil, too, and I won’t allow that. I’ll back you all right, and it won’t be just me. Speaking for my brother and our crew, it’ll be everybody on the Double C.”
Overwhelmed, Tye swallowed hard. “No, I can’t ask –” he began, only to be cut off when David walked up from behind and clapped him on the shoulder.
“Same goes for the River T. You’re not alone in this, Tye. You’ve got family and friends.”
Del nodded in agreement and Lil gave a wobbly smile, but a vise squeezed Tye’s chest. Mother of God, what had he started? He cleared his throat and shook his head.
“That’s generous of ye both, but I’ll not be the cause of a feud,” he said adamantly.
David frowned and crossed his arms. “I hope it won’t come to that, but if it does, you’re not to blame. Frank Howard is. And there’s no generosity involved.” He grinned. “Aside from you being Jessie’s brother, I owe you for getting me home after that longhorn tore me up.”
“I owe you, too, for a lot of things,” Del said gruffly, scrubbing the back of his neck. “So don’t argue.”
Tye opened his mouth to do just that but realized it would do no good. “I’m going for a walk,” he said abruptly. He started to turn away, but Lil clutched his arm.
“Not by yourself. I’ll come with you.” Her fear for him burst forth again, beating in his head like a living thing.
He caught her hands. They were cold. “Nay, I need time to think. We’ll talk when I get back.” He sent Del a speaking glance, released Lil and swung on his heel.
“But it’s not safe. You might –”
“Let him be, girl,” Del said. “You can’t put a ring through a man’s nose. Not if you want him to stay a man.”
“Keep away from Rowdy Joe’s place, Tye,” David called after him. “The Circle H boys are hanging out there.”
“Aye,” Tye replied distractedly as he strode out the door. He’d had no destination in mind, but David’s comment made him realize he needed a drink. Finding a half-way quiet saloon down the street, he went in and ordered a whiskey. Hunched over his glass at the bar, he debated what to do.
Should he wait for Judd Howard to return from Chicago and have matters out with him? Wyatt Earp hadn’t ordered him to leave town, but he’d strongly suggested it. Wichita didn’t want Texans shooting up the place while they battled it out, the lawman had informed him. Besides that, Tye feared Lil or her father or David, or one of the crew might catch a bullet in his defense.
Well then, should he go back to Texas, to the River T? No, that would be worse; he’d only bring danger down on Jessie and the children, as well as Lil and everyone else. Damn, he was like a stone dropped in the middle of a pond and the consequences were rippling out of control. He had to stop it. But how?
There was only one possible answer, and the realization of what he must do brought agony so sharp that he had to screw his eyes shut and lock his jaws to keep from crying out.
* * *
Lil sat on the edge of her bed, fighting the desire to go look for Tye. Blast it, she should have gone after him, no matter what he and her father said. She understood he needed time alone after what had happened, but couldn’t he have shut himself up in a room here at the hotel? Did he have to make himself a target for Howard’s men and drive her out of her head with worry?
Rising, she crossed to the window. Down on the street, shadows had grown long; dusk would soon wash away the colors of day. Her father would want to go for supper pretty soon, but although she hadn’t eaten a bite since early morning, Lil couldn’t think of food until Tye returned.
Tarnation! She’d waited long enough. With a swish of her skirts, she whirled and marched to the door. She would find the fool man if she had to turn Wichita upside down, she vowed. However, she was saved the trouble, for just as she came down the stairs Tye walked into the hotel.
“Tye!” she cried, flying down the last few steps. Seeing him look up, startled, she ran to him and threw her arms around him.
“Thank God you’re back! Where’ve you been so long? I’ve been scared loco for you.”
Oddly, he stiffened and hesitated before wrapping his arms around her, and his voice sounded strained. “I’m sorry, colleen, I didn’t mean to frighten ye. I . . . I had some things to do.”
The scent of soap and clean clothes told her he’d visited the bathhouse. “You’re here now,” she said, rubbing her cheek against his chest. “That’s all that counts.”
He tightened his hold for an instant. Then his hands cupped her shoulders and urged her back a step. His eyes held none of their usual flirtatious glint; the corners of his mouth slanted downward.
“You didn’t run into trouble, did you?” she asked.
“No, none, but I need to speak with ye. Alone.” He glanced around, making Lil aware of the curious stares they were getting from the desk clerk and a few other hotel patrons.
“We could go up to my room,” she said.
Overhearing her, the desk clerk cleared his throat loudly.
Lil glanced at him and met a reproachful glare. She flushed, realizing her suggestion had been improper. She had to repress a giggle, thinking of the intimate moments she and Tye had already shared.
“A walk outside will do,” he said, taking her elbow as she turned her back on the nose-in-the-air clerk.
Tye led her outside and along the uneven boardwalk, pausing to glance down the alley that separated the hotel from its neighbor. “This way,” he said, turning her in that direction. The weedy, garbage-strewn passage opened onto a vacant plot of ground behind the building. It was no cleaner than the alley, but it did offer the privacy Tye wanted.
With a disgusted oath, he kicked an empty oyster can out of the way. “’Tisn’t a fit place, but I can’t think of anywhere else.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she said with a dismissive shrug. “Tye, before you say anything, I know you’re upset about the shooting and all. But it’ll be fine, you’ll see.” She laid a hand on his arm and reached to stroke his cheek.
He flinched and caught her wrist. “Don’t! Please.” He released her abruptly and took several long strides away.
She whirled to stare at his back. “W-what is it? Did I do someth
ing?” she asked in a small voice, flooded with a new kind of fear.
He lowered his head and hunched his shoulders, hands stuffed in the pockets of his britches. “Nay, colleen. ’Tis only . . . I can’t bear for ye to touch me,” he said thickly.
“What! But . . . why?” She had to force the question out.
After a silence, he threw back his shoulders and turned to face her, features starkly composed. “Lily, I’m leaving. Tonight. I’m returning to Colorado.”
The ground seemed to heave under Lil. She staggered, and Tye rushed forward to grasp her arms and steady her.
“Colorado!” she gasped. “But I thought . . . . You said you didn’t miss it. Mining. If . . . if you changed your mind, all right, but we can’t go tonight. I’ll have to tell Pa and –”
“Not we!” Tye said sharply, interrupting her babble. “You’re not coming with me, Lily.”
“N-not coming with you?” She stared at him in horror. “You’re leaving me?”
His eyes shuttered briefly, then pinned her like a butterfly to paper. “I’m sorry. I’ve no wish to hurt ye, but I have no choice.”
“No! You can’t mean it!” Tearing free of him, she lurched backward.
“Lily, I must go, don’t ye see? It’s either that or –”
“After all your promises, after . . . everything?”
He glowered at her. “Will ye listen, woman? From what his men said, it seems certain Judd Howard will be out for my blood, and I fear others might –”
“So you’re scared of Howard, is that what you’re saying? And you’re running away. After you refused to run from Frank? Ha! You must think I’m simple-minded.” Cut to the quick by his betrayal, she hissed, “I know why you’re leaving, Tye Devlin.”
His face turned to stone. “Aye? Why don’t ye tell me then, since you’re so certain ye know the reason.”
“You’re tired of chasing cattle, tired of living on a horse. Mostly, you’re tired of . . . of me!” Her voice nearly cracked, but she forced it to remain steady. “You’re just looking for excitement and for some other fool you can peddle your charming lies to. Admit it, you no-good, low-down varmint!”
“Jaysus!” His face turned red with fury, his jet brows met above the bridge of his nose, and he ground his teeth. He took a step toward her, and another. “I’ve got half a mind to wallop your backside.”
“Stay away from me!” she cried, backing up. “Or I’ll scream until you have every cowboy in town on top of you.”
He halted, but his eyes gored her with blue flame and his chest heaved with the effort to control himself. They glared at each other for a long moment. His angry flush slowly faded and he relaxed into a hipshot stance. Hooking his thumbs under his gun belt, he smiled. His voice flowed out in a broad Irish lilt.
“Upon me faith, ye’re right, darlin’. I didn’t come west to sweat me life away for a dollar a day. I set out to strike it rich. The . . . accident may have driven me away for a while, but I’d rather go back to the tunnels than get into a donnybrook with auld man Howard. And now that ye mention it, I’m not anxious to be chained to one woman just yet.” He grinned mockingly at the whimper she couldn’t contain. “So I’ll bid ye good-bye, me fair Texas Lily, and wish ye the best. ’Twas grand while it lasted.”
Rage vibrated through Lil. “I hate you!” she hissed, fists rigid at her sides.
Something flickered in his eyes. Pain? No, she wasn’t fool enough to believe that. Spinning away, she stumbled toward the alley, but his voice stopped her.
“One thing, Lil, I’d not wish a child of mine to carry the title of bastard. I’ll let David and Jessie know where I am. If ye have need of my name, tell them to send word.”
She hurled him a murderous glare over her shoulder. “The hell I will! I never want to set eyes on you again.”
“Aye? Ye may feel different if and when the time comes,” he barked. Then his tone softened. “Good-bye, love.”
Lil gasped. “Don’t you dare call me that!” She longed to tear his heart out, just as he’d done to her, but tears had started in her eyes. She refused to let him see her cry. Hiking up her skirts, she ran and didn’t stop running until she was back in her room.
Locking the door, she collapsed on the bed and rocked back and forth, hugging herself in a desperate effort to keep from breaking down. Why had she trusted that black-hearted Irishman? Why had she let down her guard? All the promises he’d made, all the sweet things he’d said, were nothing but lies. She hated him. She really did!
Oh God, I’ll never see him again.
Doubling over, she buried her face in her hands and let the pain take her. The shaking started inside and spread outward, along with hot, salty tears that gushed down her face in rivers. She wanted to die. What was there to live for without Tye?
How could he do this to her? How could he call her his love, his darling, and then leave? Sorry to hurt her, was he? Liar! He didn’t give a damn about her. About his child, maybe, should there be one, but not her.
A knock on her door brought her upright with a gasp. She sprang to her feet, swiping away tears and damp strands of hair from her face. Had Tye changed his mind? Had he come back to her? She started to run to the door, then halted at the sound of her father’s voice.
“Lil, you in there? It’s time to go eat.”
Her brief spark of hope died. Pressing a hand to her lips, she smothered the despairing sob that tried to escape. She couldn’t face her father, couldn’t bear to explain the reason for her tears. And she sure couldn’t eat.
“I’m not h-hungry,” she called in a clogged voice. “Go ahead without me.”
“Are you crying?” he asked, trying the doorknob. “Honey, I know you’re worried about Tye, but don’t make yourself sick.”
Lil cleared her throat and crossed unsteadily to the door, leaning her forehead against it. “I . . . I’m all right, Pa. I’m just tired, and my head hurts.” That part was no lie; she had a pounding headache.
“I’ll go look for the boy, if it’ll make you feel better.”
“No! No, you don’t have to. I’m not worried about him. He can take care of himself.” And be damned, for all she cared!
There was silence, then a heavy sigh. “All right, if you’re sure. You want me to bring you up something to eat?”
She smiled through her despair. “Thanks, but I think I’ll just go to bed. I’m sorry to worry you.”
“Shoot, I’m your pa, ain’t I? It’s my job to worry about you.”
Lil bit her lip hard to keep from crying. “I . . . I love you.”
His muffled voice turned gruff. “I love you, too, girl. Get some sleep now. I’ll see you in the morning.”
Unable to speak, she listened to him walk away. Then she dragged herself to the bed and dropped face-first onto it, releasing a fresh river of sorrow on the pillow.
It was late, very late, when she finally stopped crying. Exhausted and waterlogged, she stared into the darkness above her, hearing Tye say he didn’t want to be chained to a woman. The words hammered her bruised heart, driving home the fact that he’d never really cared about her. He’d only used her.
But why, then, had he treated her so tenderly every time they made love, always giving her such pleasure? And how could he open himself up to her the way he had that day outside Caldwell? Was everything he’d told her a pack of lies? How was that possible when he’d actually cried in her arms afterward. He’d also said he loved her, she remembered with a sickening burst of pain. That had been a lie.
Yet he’d risked his life to save her, twice. And he’d gone up against Frank Howard, not just today, but before – for her sake. Why, when she was nothing more than a fleeting conquest to him?
Mercy! She still couldn’t believe he’d beaten Frank to the draw. He’d sure hidden his gun savvy under a bushel, just like his true intentions toward her.
So he could shoot, so he wasn’t a coward. That only proved he wasn’t afraid of Judd Howard. Besides, her father and
David had sworn to back him up if it came down to a fight with Judd. Oh, but he must go, he had no choice. Horse apples! He wanted to go, as she’d finally forced him to admit.
Funny though, he’d seemed so reluctant to tell her he was leaving. She recalled how he’d hunched into himself for a moment, as if it hurt him to say the words. Something else hovered at the edge of her memory, something he’d started to say before she cut him off. Judd Howard would be out for his blood, he’d said, and he feared . . . he feared others might . . . .
“My God!” She sat bolt upright. He was afraid someone else might get hurt! Like David or Jessie – or her. That’s what he’d meant to say. And he’d decided to remove himself rather than cause a bloody feud, was that it? Of course it was!
If she hadn’t been so full of pain and rage, she would have seen the truth immediately. Instead, she’d jumped to the conclusion that he merely wanted to be free of her, and he’d let her believe it, had even confirmed it for her. Why? Because she would have insisted on going with him. He knew her too well, her brave, knot-headed Irishman.
Well, she wasn’t going to let him walk out of her life that easily. No sir!
Bounding off the bed, she lit the lamp sitting on a lowboy near the door. By its opalescent glow, she fought her way out of dress, petticoats and corset, and threw on her worn trail clothes. Yanking out the crushed bow she’d struggled to tie that morning, she worked her hair into a careless braid, then shoved her belongings back in her war bag. She almost left the blue dress behind, but stuffed it in at the last minute. When she caught up with Tye, she would need it.
Dousing the lamp, she dashed into the hall and headed for David’s room. It was at the opposite end of the dimly lighted hallway. No light showed under his door. It was late. He was probably asleep. Too bad. She’d just have to wake him up.
It took him a few moments to answer her knock. He gave a groggy curse and asked who it was, and she replied in an urgent whisper. That brought a softer oath. By the time he lighted a lamp, got some clothes on, and opened the door, she was ready to break it down.
“David, you’ve got to help me!” she cried, pushing past him. “I have to find Tye before it’s too late!”