Frank was one of my favorites. He was tall and bald and his smile covered the bottom half of his clean-shaven face. He was the type of person who, when he walked into a room, everyone stopped and looked. He had a presence that drew people in and made them want to get to know him. And when you talked to him, he made you feel like you were the most important person in the world.
“How’s Karin?” I asked.
“Great. She’s enjoying the grandkids and started crocheting.”
“Is she making anything special?”
“Hats for the girls.”
Frank pulled out his cell phone to show me photos of his granddaughters, who ranged in age from one to nine, wearing the hats his wife had made them.
“They’re adorable, Frank.”
“Yes, they are. And a handful. I don’t remember our boys being so needy.”
I laughed. “Having had both, little boys are definitely different than little girls. It seems boys naturally gravitate toward anything that has wheels and girls love dolls.”
Frank nodded. “Absolutely. We took our oldest two granddaughters to dinner the other night and they insisted on bringing their dolls. The waiter was nice enough to bring each of them a high chair. What a hoot that was, sitting at a table with two girls and two baby dolls in high chairs.”
I laughed. “I bet people thought that was adorable.”
“Yeah. They even took their diaper bags and went to the ladies room to change the dolls.”
I doubled over laughing.
Frank held up his finger. “But the best part…”
“There’s a better part?”
Frank nodded. “We’re sitting at the table and my eldest granddaughter is talking to her doll and telling her that her grandfather, my son, has a torn labia. My wife, who had just taken a sip of wine, coughed and the wine went everywhere. I never laughed so hard in all my life. ‘I think you mean a labrum,’ Karin corrected her. We’ve laughed about that every day since.”
“That’s a priceless moment, Frank. One I’m sure you’ll never forget.”
“The other week I was having a particularly difficult day. As you know, things haven’t gone as well as I would’ve liked with the business. Karin, who’s always believed laughter is the best medicine, left a tiny note on the table for me. I found it the next morning.”
Frank held up his hand and pretended to draw. “She wrote on the outside, ‘When you need a laugh, open.’ On the inside…” Frank pretended to open an imaginary card. “It said labia in all caps.”
I laughed. “Karin is so awesome!”
“That she is. So now I carry that note in my wallet and, whenever I’m having a tough day, I pull it out. It always makes my day better.”
“Thanks for sharing your story, Frank.”
“Your kids ever do anything like that?”
I smiled. “Well, there was this one time…” I stopped talking.
“Oh, no.” Frank shook his finger at me. “I told you my labia story. Yours can’t be any worse than that.”
“Well, once, when Tory was a toddler, we were waiting in line at the grocery store and she announced rather loudly that she had a vagina.”
Frank started laughing.
“She’d been learning the various body parts and earlier that day, while taking a bath, asked me about her privates. I’ve always thought honesty is the best policy. So David’s penis was never pee-pee. I told Tory she had a vagina like me and David had a penis like Daddy. So there we were in line when Tory shouted, ‘I got a vagina!’ Everyone turned to look and I was mortified. But it didn’t stop there. She pointed to the man in front of us who had turned around and said, ‘Do you have a penis or a vagina?’”
By now Frank was doubled over and I was laughing, too. When my boss opened the door to see what all the noise was about, neither of us could speak.
I couldn’t remember the last time I’d laughed so hard and made a mental note to write vagina on a tiny piece of paper and stick it in my wallet. I’d take one from Frank’s playbook and, when my day stank, pull it out and read it.
Frank left to meet with my boss while I finished up and left for the gym. Renee was waiting for me. “Let’s take some photos today.”
I pulled out my cell phone and handed it to her. Renee accessed the photos we’d taken on my first day. “Look how far you’ve come.” She flipped the phone around so I could see.
“Yuck! I can’t believe how fat I was.”
“You weren’t fat,” Renee said. “You were beautiful then and you’re beautiful now. But I’m guessing you feel better now.”
“Absolutely. My clothes fit better and I definitely have more energy. It hasn’t been easy and there are days when I definitely struggle to get to the gym. It’d be so much easier to go home. Especially now, when I have all this packing to do. But I always feel better after I’ve finished working out.”
Renee pulled out the tape measure. “Let’s check your measurements.” She wrote down the new numbers and compared them to the ones she’d taken when I started. She pumped her fist. “Yes! You’ve lost about an inch all over.”
That night I had more energy to work out than I had in a long time. I knew my clothes fit better, but seeing the new measurements written next to the old boosted my spirits. I felt great knowing that all of my hard work was paying off. I was going to be fifty, and I couldn’t remember when I’d felt this good about myself. For years, I’d been the one hiding behind everyone else in a photograph. I’d wear flowing tops that flared out and covered my expanding waistline and butt. But I was gaining some confidence. I actually liked myself, and I hadn’t liked myself in a very long time.
I even had enough energy to do some packing before I went to bed that night. I’d been going through the books, deciding which ones to keep and which to donate to the library. Each year, the library held a huge book sale and the money raised helped fund various initiatives, everything from children’s programing to new equipment. Some of the books I hadn’t looked at in years.
I picked up the book I’d bought to encourage David to go to the potty instead of in his diaper. It seemed like it took forever to potty train him. I flipped through the book, laughing inside as I read about making wee-wee and poo-poo. I just couldn’t bring myself to put that book on the library pile, so I added it to mine.
I’d called Tory and David before I started packing the books to see if there were any they wanted to keep. David had boxes and boxes of scary middle-grade books and Tory liked the babysitter series. Both told me to donate them to the library.
Sorting the books transported me back in time. I could pick up a book and know exactly whose it was and when it was bought. We’d always been a family of readers and visiting the bookstore on a weekly basis was just something we did. Even when Mike and I divorced, whoever had the kids for the weekend always took them to the bookstore. I can’t begin to calculate the amount of money I’d invested in books over the years, which is why living next to a bookstore sounded like pure heaven to me.
My cell phone rang. It was Tory. “Hi, honey.”
“Hi, Mom. Doing anything special?”
“Just packing. How about you?”
“I just finished having dinner with Dad and his new girlfriend.”
“Whoa, wait. Another new girlfriend? What happened to Kelsey?”
“Who knows. I didn’t have a chance to ask Dad.”
I shouldn’t have been so surprised Mike was dating someone new. He’d been changing women as often as he changed underwear since we’d divorced.
“I’m sorry, honey. Did you know he was bringing her?”
“Dad called around noon. Said he was in the area and wondered if I was free for dinner. I accepted before I knew he had company. He’d brought Angela along and she shopped in the city while he met with clients.”
“I see. Well, did you have fun?”
“It was okay. But Mom, Angela’s only twenty-nine, not much old
er than me or David.”
I listened as Tory described Angela. Skinny, all legs, shoulder-length blonde hair and “definitely fake boobs.” “Dad said they met at a charity event she’d attended with her parents.”
“Is she nice?”
“Yeah, I guess. But she’s too young for him, Mom. What’s he thinking?”
I wanted to say that his small head was thinking for his big head, but I didn’t. “It’s his life, Tory. You can’t make his decisions for him. He’s a big boy.”
“She just wants his money,” Tory continued. “I called David and he reacted like the typical male.”
“Why? What did David say?”
“He said he’s happy for Dad. That if a guy his age can get a woman her age, all power to him. I think he’s going through a midlife crisis.”
“Listen, Tory, I know you love your dad, but I’m not sure I’m the one you should be talking to about this.”
“Oh crap, Mom! You’re right. I’m such an insensitive jerk!”
“No, you’re not. I just feel uncomfortable, you know?”
I talked with Tory for a while, took Muffin out to go to the bathroom and then crawled into bed.
I couldn’t help thinking about Mike dating a woman who could be his daughter. I’d never date a guy who could be my son. It was just so yuck! I fell asleep thinking about labias and vaginas and wee-wees and pee-pees. It was so weird that all of these odd things had come together in one day and I was thankful for it, thankful I didn’t have cancer, that I had sold my house and was buying a new one. And I was especially thankful I was healthy. I’d realized when I had the cancer scare that your health is the most important thing because if you don’t have your health, you have nothing at all.
Chapter 18
I was in the travel section of the bookstore browsing the Route 66 titles when I heard Mike.
“Scarlett?”
I turned around to find him gawking. “I almost didn’t recognize you. You look great.”
I didn’t know whether to be insulted or flattered. On the one hand, the fact that he almost didn’t recognize me meant all that damn sweating in the gym was working. On the other hand, if he almost didn’t recognize me I must’ve been a hippo.
Mike tried to recover. “I didn’t mean that how it sounded.”
“Don’t worry about it. And thanks. I’ve never felt better.”
“Tory said you’ll be moving soon.”
I nodded. “I’m actually moving this weekend.”
“Do you need any help?”
“No, I’m fine.”
I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking your ex looks pretty good these days and maybe you’ll get a piece. Think again. I don’t need you or want you.
Mike glanced around. “So, what are you doing in the travel section?”
I held up the Route 66 book I’d just taken off the shelf. “Planning a road trip with Shonna.”
“Nice. Didn’t we talk about doing that?”
Yes, but like a lot of things we talked about, it never happened because you were always too busy with work. “I don’t think so. It’s something Shonna and I have wanted to do since we were teens.”
“So it’ll just be the two of you?”
“Oh, definitely. This is a girls-only trip. What happens on the road stays on the road.”
Mike nodded.
A young blonde who didn’t look to be much older than David came round the corner. “Mike, I wondered where you went. But then I remembered you wanted to buy a Paris guidebook.”
Mike turned to look at her. “Hi, sweetheart. I was just talking to Scarlett.”
Sweetheart? He never called me sweetheart.
“Scarlett, this is Angela. Angela, Scarlett.”
I smiled politely and held out my hand.
“I’ve heard so much about you,” Angela said.
Yes, I’m sure you have!
“I love the quilt you made Tory,” she continued. “I saw it when we visited her in New York.”
“Thanks.”
“It was funny because one patch looked really familiar. It turned out we had the same Easter dress when we were little girls. Of course, my dress was larger because I’m older.”
Not that much older!
I looked at the books Angela was holding. Both were bestsellers. “I see you enjoy reading.”
“Oh, no. These are for my mom. I never read physical books.” She pulled out her cell phone. “I read on this or my tablet, but mostly on this. Now, Mike is old-school.”
That’s because he could be your freakin’ father!
“He’s looking for a book about Paris. I haven’t been to Paris since high school.”
I’ve never been there, but always wanted to go!
“Mike’s taking me there for my birthday.”
What the…? Seriously? I always wanted to go to Paris, but Mike always poo-pooed the trip. And now he’s taking you?
I guess Mike noticed my reaction because he suggested to Angela they move along. But she wasn’t quite done talking.
“Where are you going, Scarlett?”
I held up the book again. “Route 66?”
Angela scrunched her nose. “What’s that?”
“A road that runs from Chicago to LA.”
“You’re going to drive down a road? But why? What’s so special about that road?”
“John Steinbeck? Grapes of Wrath?”
She shook her head.
I wasn’t in the mood to explain to Angela the cultural importance of Route 66, so I suggested that perhaps Mike could explain and excused myself and went to pay for the book.
After leaving the store, I got into my car and called Shonna. “Oh. My. God. I met Mike’s new girlfriend in the bookstore just now.”
“He has another new girlfriend?”
“Yes, and she’s a kid. Doesn’t look much older than David. And, get this… she had no idea why I wanted to take a trip on Route 66?”
Shonna laughed and I explained the encounter. “And he’s freakin’ taking her to Paris. I always wanted to go to Paris and he never took me. Now he’s taking her so they can have a romantic getaway for her birthday. I freakin’ had his two kids, practically raised them single-handedly because he was always busy with work, and never once did he take me anywhere alone. If we went somewhere it was with the kids and usually a place he wanted to go. Jerk!”
“His loss,” Shonna said. “You deserve better.”
“That’s for sure. He almost didn’t recognize me and seemed surprised when he saw how much weight I’d lost.”
“Work it, girlfriend!”
“Oh, believe me, I did. I remembered when I ran into him in the grocery store and how I looked like crap. I was so glad I’d worn the new sundress I’d bought because it showed off my arms, which no longer look like elephant trunks hanging by my side. My biceps finally have some definition.”
Shonna laughed. “We’re going to have so much fun on Route 66! I can’t believe it’s only a month away!”
“Me neither. But first the move.”
“Everything all set for that?”
“Yes. Movers are coming at seven. I can’t wait to be in my new place. It’ll be fun fixing it up.”
“I’m so happy for you,” Shonna said.
“What about you? Anything new there?”
“Roger is his usual A-hole self. Jason’s busy with baseball and Maggie discovered my expensive make-up.”
I laughed. “So Jason hasn’t had any driving accidents?”
“No, thank God. Roger ended up hiring a driving instructor because he didn’t have the patience to teach him either.”
“They’re coming now,” I said.
“Who?”
“Mike and Angela. They just left the store.”
“Get off the phone and videotape them or snap some pictures and send them to me. I want to see what she looks like.”
I h
ung up and snapped some photos of Angela and Mike as they walked to his BMW parked two rows over. Then I took a little video of him opening the door for her. After they pulled out of the parking lot, I called Shonna back to see if she’d received the photos and video.
“She does look young!” Shonna said.
“Exactly! And did you see the video? He opened the door for her. He never opened the door for me!”
“Men! Who needs them?” Shonna said. “The only thing they’re good for is a good lay and sometimes even that’s not worth it.”
We laughed. I couldn’t wait for our trip. Route 66 was going to be a blast!
As soon as I got home from the bookstore I changed into shorts and a tank top. I’d started running outside and wanted to do a couple of miles before the sun went down. I ran the loop around the development I lived in. Once around was a half mile so I wanted to run the loop four times.
I noticed I didn’t get as winded when I was running and, by the end of my fourth lap, I felt good enough to run a fifth. When I was done running a fifth, I ran a sixth. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d run three miles. Maybe never. But when I finished I felt on top of the world. I could do this marathon thing. Paris? Blah! I was going to get into the best shape of my life and complete a marathon if it killed me. Take that, Mike! Asshole!
Chapter 19
I watched as the movers loaded the truck. It had definitely been worth spending the money to hire professionals. They handled the antiques with care and dismantled the beds, assuring me they’d set them up in my new place. I’d marked all of the boxes so I knew which room I wanted the movers to put them in.
I choked up when they carried out the small crib I’d slept in as a child. It’d belonged to my grandmother. My father had slept in it and so had Tommy and I. By the time David was born, the crib no longer met safety requirements because the slots were too far apart. But I couldn’t part with it. There had to be something I could use it for; I just hadn’t figured it out yet.
There were so many items, like the crib, I couldn’t part with. Where Mike saw junk, I saw possibility. Being able to reinvent something old into some new and useful always seemed like a noble thing. He’d laugh when I turned discarded wine corks into trivets or Christmas tree ornaments. Toilet paper rolls into gift card holders. I once made musical instruments for the kids, all from discarded items. Something new could always be found in something old. The trouble was that most people didn’t see it. They were too busy looking at what once was to take notice of what could be.
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