‘Course not.’ I wave her question away with a grin, but actually I haven’t stopped thinking about that killer ute. We continue on to the firmer sand. I can’t get ‘sitting duck’ out of my mind. Why are we waiting it out in the park? And I wonder afresh if Felicity is up to protecting us. I must have convinced Mei better than myself for she starts jumping the little waves as they curl in front of her. She squeals – not the annoying squealing girls do at school – just happy ones.
‘It’s almost warm,’ she says. ‘It’s so cool, swimming this time of night.’
‘We only have an hour,’ I warn. We put on our masks and dance further into the waves. We smile at each other before we put the snorkels in our mouths and sink underwater. To the right of us are rocks and we swim towards them. With the light fading there isn’t a lot to see. I catch flashes of silver a few times and wonder if they are tommies or gar. Dev loves tommies. I’ll have to bring a line down tomorrow night, I think.
Mei and I surface within a circle of rocks, with the swell rising and slapping against them. We pull off our masks and snorkels. ‘This is magic,’ she whispers. She lifts her face up to mine. I love her upturned nose, the way her eyes crinkle when she smiles. I kiss the tip of her nose.
That’s when we hear the growl. We jump apart in the water. ‘What was that?’ Mei’s eyes aren’t crinkly any more. I’m not sure what it can be; it’s almost dark so visibility isn’t the best. Mei and I wade over to the northern rocks. The sound had come from there.
‘Be careful, Joel,’ Mei says and then sucks in her breath. ‘Wow. Look at that.’
On the rock is a sea lion. Not fully grown either. It doesn’t slide away as we edge closer, so something’s wrong. I stop. ‘It’s injured, I reckon.’
‘What’ll we do? Report it?’
‘How can we? We’re meant to be hiding.’ Worry makes me sharp with Mei but I don’t want to be. I put my arm around her. ‘We should ask Felicity – she’ll know.’
I leave Mei watching the sea lion and race back to get Felicity. She isn’t in her tent. I hear the murmur of voices and see her silhouette in the tent I share with Dev. I stop for a second, breathing fast – what’s she doing in our tent? When I walk through the flap, Dev has his arm around her shoulders and she’s blowing her nose. It looks real cosy and I can see my future dissolving like white froth on breakers. I’m getting better at not shouting or losing it but my face must be showing how annoyed I am because Dev frowns and drops his arm. ‘Something wrong, mate?’ he asks.
‘Yeah.’ I manage to resist the urge to say Felicity being in our tent is wrong.
Mei cuts in; she’s followed me up. ‘Down on the rocks . . .’ she’s puffing, ‘. . . there’s a hurt sea lion.’ She looks at Felicity. ‘Do you know what to do?’
Felicity nods. Whatever they were doing – kissing, I expect – she’s over it and standing up. Her eyes look a bit red but I can’t afford any sympathy for Felicity. If Dev falls in love with her, he’ll leave Gran and me. Felicity won’t want to live with us; she’d never leave her home.
‘Show me,’ Felicity says and Mei takes her hand.
The sea lion pup is still on the rock. Felicity takes off her shoes and wades in with us. It growls but doesn’t move when Felicity comes close. Turns out the sea lion’s flipper is damaged. ‘Maybe he was in a fight or got caught in a net,’ Felicity murmurs. ‘A family of them visits the coast here. This might be one of the pups. He’s probably only eight months old.’
‘Should I feed him?’ I say. That’s something I can do at least.
Felicity looks at me with her eyebrows raised, like how am I going to do that?
‘I can drop in a line, catch a few.’
She thinks before she answers. ‘That would be great, Joel. Normally we shouldn’t feed a sea lion – they come out of the water for a reason and go back when they’re healthy, but right now he can’t swim well enough to feed.’ She turns back to the sea lion. ‘I think his flipper will get better by itself as long as he can keep his strength up.’ Felicity smiles and it slips right into my middle. Sometimes I wish she wasn’t so nice. It’s hard to keep my guard up. I leave Mei with Felicity and rush up to get my fishing gear. Dev’s outside the tent. ‘You okay, mate?’
‘Sure, the sea lion will be fine.’
He considers me a bit longer, then he says, ‘Felice is okay, mate. Give her a chance.’
I stiffen. Felice. ‘Sure.’ I know Felicity is okay but hearing Dev use Max’s nickname for her is like the end of our life together. How can Felicity fit into our life? I grunt and collect my tackle and a torch. ‘Just dropping a line in.’
Dev gives me a thumbs up. ‘Have fun, mate.’
All the way back to the beach I’m stewing. With the help of my torch, I find a sandworm for bait and when I get settled on the biggest rock, Felicity comes over to see what I’m doing. I’m short with her and our conversation goes like this:
Felicity: Think you’ll catch something, Joel?
Me: Yep.
Felicity: Think you’ll catch a garfish?
Me: Maybe.
Felicity: Do you always catch your own bait?
Me: Sometimes.
Felicity: You like fishing, don’t you?
That one only gets a grunt. And what do you know – she plonks herself down beside me, uninvited, as if we’d had a great conversation. I move away a bit, then she tries a different tack. ‘I know this is difficult for you, Joel. Scary even.’
I don’t answer that. What’s she think I am – a little kid?
‘I want you to know I will do all I can to keep you and Mei safe.’
I look at her then. Maybe I don’t manage to wipe the disbelief from my face for she adds, ‘The police know where we are. We only have to ring and they’ll be here immediately.’ She stops and bites her lip before she goes on. ‘But it is essential we all stick together. If anything should happen and I wasn’t there . . .’ Felicity and I stare into the dark water. So we’re all to keep close, except for going to the dunny. Dev and I might go mad.
Felicity pulls herself up and moves away, but not too far, so she can still keep an eye on me.
Mei’s talking to the sea lion, and finally I get a bite. A gar. I reel it in and take it still flapping to the pup. I lean over gently and hold the fish out. The pup sniffs, then whips it out of my hand, quicker than I thought he would be able to.
Mei looks at me as if I’ve conquered a giant squid, but really I just did what I do best: fishing. She puts an arm through mine and we stand there, the water slapping our thighs, and watch the sea lion enjoy his meal.
20
Every evening Mei and I try our hardest to befriend the sea lion pup. I think catching him fish helps a lot. He doesn’t growl so much as grunt now when we visit him. Mei reckons he’s pleased to see us. Pleased to see my fish, I bet. I hope I don’t turn him into a dependent pup that can’t fend for himself. As soon as he’s well, I’ll have to stop feeding him or else he won’t remember how to catch his own food.
I manage to catch enough fish for us all tonight. That feels good and Felicity is impressed with me. When we’ve finished eating we tell stories. It’s Dev’s idea. Felicity’s pretty good at telling stories. When Mei tells her about how the sea lion seems to greet us, Felicity gets going. ‘Where my ancestors come from there were seals who could shed their skins and change into humans. They were called selkies.’ Mei is rapt. ‘Once, a man fell in love with a girl who was actually a selkie. He hid her sealskin in a box, so she couldn’t go back to the sea to be a seal.
‘She married the young man, but one day she found the sealskin when she was spring cleaning. She immediately returned to the sea to become a seal again. But sometimes she came to shore to see her husband and he decided that she should choose when to be a seal and when to be his wife. So he never hid the skin again.’
Felicity goes quie
t for a while and I can tell she’s thinking. Dev tells us how male sea lions can cause havoc. ‘Rogue seals have been known to steal the catches from fishing boats.’
‘Maybe they were selkies,’ Felicity says. ‘Male selkies have been known to do stuff like that when sea lions have been killed.’
Mei is watching her, enthralled. Then she says, ‘Maybe Joel has some selkie blood in him because he can’t keep away from the sea.’
Felicity smiles at her and when she turns her face and sees me her smile doesn’t fade. It’s like she doesn’t want to be anywhere else right now, except here with us.
It’s interesting that when there’s no TV you start telling stories and enjoying each other’s company more. I’m even enjoying Felicity’s.
Afterwards, when Dev and I are in our sleeping bags, I lay a heavy on him. Even though we may be in danger, I feel okay, happy even, and I ask him about it. ‘Can you be happy when things aren’t right?’
We’ve turned the lamp down but I can almost see Dev’s smile, hear it in his voice. ‘I’ve learnt that happiness doesn’t depend on what happens.’
How can that be? Of course it does. I feel happy right now because we’ve had a good night. Isn’t that what’s made me happy? I think about kids at school having to be the best on the team, wanting the latest windsurfing rig, being upset when they get detention, blaming other kids for getting them in trouble. They’re only happy when things are going right.
‘Happiness starts in your head, mate. We can’t live by our feelings. Happiness depends on how we see things, being thankful for what we already have, not on what has happened to us. Stuff will always happen – life is like the sea, one minute it’s calm and peaceful out there, and the next it’s blowing a storm and wrecking boats, taking lives. But we have the power to change our attitude about anything, to be content, and that can alter our whole life.’
I’m stunned. ‘I don’t think everybody knows that.’ And I can see what it is that makes Dev the way he is – powerful but peaceful. I wonder if I’ll ever be able to think like Dev. Felicity could very well take him from me – that would change my life, and what about Scott? My own father is trying to wreck my life, even from behind bars. How can I remember that and still be happy?
21
Mei and I can never wait to go down to see the pup. Mei has named him Barney. I would have thought someone with Mei’s brains could think up a more original name, but she reckons that’s what he looks like.
Whenever we approach him now he flaps a bit and looks like he’s saying hello. He’s pretty noisy. He still hasn’t put on a lot of weight but he moves around more. Tonight when we get there he’s wet.
‘He’s been swimming,’ Mei says in wonder.
‘He’s getting better then. He’ll be able to catch his own fish,’ I say.
‘I hope he still hangs around.’
My guess is he won’t pass up on an easy supper too easily and I hold out the fish I’ve just caught. ‘This is the last one, Barney. Now you have to catch your own.’ He takes it more gently than he used to. He must not be as hungry. We watch him swallow the fish. When he’s finished he stares at us with those huge cow eyes, then slips slowly into the water. He pops his head up to see if we’re still there. It’s like he’s inviting us to play.
Mei clutches my arm. ‘We should follow him – see where he goes. What if his flipper isn’t good enough for swimming? He could get stuck on a rock again with nothing to eat.’
I reckon a sea lion would know when he’s ready to swim again but it would be fun to follow him. ‘Okay,’ I say.
We put on our masks and snorkels and chase him south. He’s heading towards town. We surface every now and then to see where we are. At one point we catch up to Barney – he must have rested. Mei reaches out and touches him. Dev’s warning of rogue seals comes to mind so I surface beside her to check she’s okay. She’s gasping with excitement. ‘Did you see that? He let me touch him. This is so cool.’
Just then I hear a noise, like a car door slamming.
‘Let’s keep following Barney,’ Mei’s saying.
‘Shhh,’ I say and turn towards the shore. I don’t recognise where we are and it’s way past dusk.
‘What is it?’
‘I heard something. We’d better check before we go back.’
‘What about Barney?’ Worry bubbles up in Mei’s voice.
‘Maybe he’ll come back. Let’s go.’ I know Felicity wouldn’t like us to be this far down the coast. ‘We’ll see if someone is camping here.’ I don’t have to tell Mei to be quiet. We hold the masks in our hands so they don’t clatter, and tiptoe as best we can across the sand dunes up to the scrub.
We’re crouching behind some bushes when I catch the crackle of a two-way radio, the sort that trucks use. It’s faint so we creep further into the scrub.
And then we see it. I almost fall over in shock.
‘Is that the ute?’ Mei sounds husky.
‘Yep.’ I blow out, trying to calm down. The ute is quiet, like a croc with its eyes closed, but I’m not fooled. I’ve seen what it can do. Why is it here?
Mei voices what I’m thinking. ‘Does he know we’re in the park?’
‘Don’t know.’ I try to gauge how far we’ve swum. A kilometre or more? Maybe the ute is only a few kays from our camp. I pull Mei by the arm and we creep backwards. ‘We have to warn Felicity.’
‘Should we run cross-country?’ Good old Mei, thinking of the quickest way, but we could get lost in the dark. I glance at the sky. It’s purple already.
‘It’ll be safer running back the way we came.’
Mei nods and we race down to the sand. We don’t even look for Barney, just run as quietly as we can along the beach. After a few false stops we find our own beach. We recognise the rocks and race up to our camp.
Felicity gets stuck in to us before we can say a word. ‘Where have you two been? I’ve been worried sick.’
‘Just about to call in the cavalry, mate.’ This is Dev. It sounds funny but he’s not meaning it to be.
‘We just meant to see the sea lion,’ I say. ‘And we followed him a bit.’
‘Why did you do that?’ Felicity’s eyes are drawn tight.
‘We wanted to check he was okay,’ Mei says. Her voice is small.
Dev nods at me and guesses my reason: to get away, to be free for a while.
Felicity sighs.
‘There’s something we have to tell you,’ I say, still breathless from the run up the beach.
‘We saw something,’ Mei says.
Felicity raises her eyebrows at us. ‘What did you see?’
‘The ute,’ Mei and I say together.
Felicity and Dev stare at us. ‘Here? In the park?’ Felicity says.
I nod. ‘Maybe only a couple of kays away.’
Felicity glances at Dev. There’s a question in that glance, one we’ve all been thinking, I’m sure: how did he find out we’re here?
Mei’s twisting her ponytail. ‘Maybe he just likes camping,’ she says kind of hopefully.
It is a possibility but Felicity shakes her head. ‘We can’t rely on that. I have to tell the police. And Max. Maybe he should be here.’
‘And advertise with the four-wheel drive where we are?’ Dev says. Then he puts a hand on her shoulder, like he’s showing her she can rely on him.
Felicity’s face softens, and I can tell she’s not cross with us any more. ‘I want you two to go to bed. No lamps on either.’
22
The next morning at breakfast Felicity tells us she’s been in contact with the local policeman. ‘He’s coming over.’
‘Won’t he be seen?’ Mei asks.
I also wonder about a flashing police car roaring through the park.
Felicity smiles at us. ‘No, he’ll be in an unmarked car and he’ll park further away
. He’ll tell us what to do when he gets here.’
We all wait around. It’s hard to concentrate on anything. What is there to do except clean up the kitchen tent, tidy our sleeping tents, go to the toilet? That takes longer than usual with digging up dirt to throw into the communal hole like it’s a compost bin, but there’s still time to spare. Mei writes in her diary, and I actually start reading one of the novels she’s brought. It isn’t bad – it’s all about a guy surviving a shipwreck in the old days.
Then we hear whistling. Felicity motions for Mei and me to go into her tent. I peek out the window. Soon Felicity is smiling so the whistler must be the policeman. He’s dressed like any old hiker and gives her a bag of food. She brings him over to Dev, and they start talking. Dev’s frowning. Uh-oh. Something’s wrong. Soon the men are arguing. I can’t hear what they’re saying but Dev’s face is turning red. Finally Felicity gets them to calm down and she calls to Mei and me.
When we get there, Felicity looks at me for too long, which makes me uncomfortable. Actually, all the adults are staring at me. What’s up? I check their faces one by one. Dev’s not happy. Felicity seems nervous; she’s started to roll her lip between her teeth. The officer looks expectant, as if he’s going to ask me to do something important. I steady myself.
‘Joel.’ He clears his throat. ‘I am Constable Dylan Jones, and I need a favour. You don’t have to do this, but we will be taking precautions—’
‘What is it?’ I cut in. I can’t stand suspense like this.
His gaze rests on my face for a while. I’ve surprised him, I can tell.
‘The ute is gone so we’d like you to go down to the beach where you saw it and—’ his voice hooks me in; it sounds kind of urgent, ‘—and go fishing. I hear you’re good at it.’
Dev wipes his face. Felicity is chewing her lip. Mei’s shaking her head, and I can see it all. See what Mei said about sitting ducks. This police officer doesn’t know me from a bar of soap. Would he ask his little brother to do this?
Killer Ute Page 7