Elsa was driving. She made the perfect designated driver. Even a sip of alcohol and she got violently ill. Didn’t matter what sort, either; beer, wine, and hard liquor all made her sick. But she had enough “fun” genes to make up for it. We chatted about what we might see that night during the ride over.
“Saturday is usually couples’ night,” I moaned. “We picked the wrong night to go out.”
“Not necessarily,” Louise retorted. “This is supposed to be a singles’ bar. There may be some couples, sure, but I bet not as many at the beginning as at the end of the night!” We all snickered. The majority of the DJs around town always used the phrase “hotel-motel time” when it was closing time. It was truer than not in many places.
CHAPTER SIX
“Twenty dollars?” I squeaked. “That’s an awful lot to pay just to get in the door!”
“It’s obvious you haven’t been out in a while,” Elsa said. “That’s pretty much the going rate. Besides, you can afford it.”
It wasn’t the money that concerned me. It was the principle of the thing. Cork didn’t charge a damned thing to walk into his place and I had a lot of fun at his pub.
“Hey, we’re in time,” Louise grabbed my arm and pulled. “There’s still an open table right by the dance floor. C’mon, let’s grab it!”
Elsa grabbed my other hand and we followed in Louise’s wake, threading our way through what was promising to be a wall-to-wall crowd. We plopped in the chairs a split second before two couples, who’d obviously also seen the empty table, were able to make it that far.
“That was close!” Louise laughed. “I didn’t want to stand all night. Now, who’ve we got so far?” She craned her neck to check out the room. Subtlety was not one of Louise’s attributes. Elsa and I did the same, but I like to think I was a little more circumspect in my perusal. I didn’t see anyone who caught my fancy, but the night was yet young.
A couple of hours and a couple of drinks later, the evening was in full swing. The band was playing at full volume and the dance floor was crowded. Louise and Elsa danced with several different men while I kept the table occupied so it wouldn’t get taken. That’s not to say I hadn’t been asked. I just hadn’t been asked by anyone I cared to dance with.
The band was playing a song I’d never heard (not that I kept up with country music, you understand) when I felt a hand on my shoulder and a sweet baritone voice shout in my ear, “May I have this dance?”
I turned to see that gorgeous hunk of elf, Perchaladon, leaning down. Immediately, alarms sounded in my head. Not that there weren’t some paranormals in the crowd – there were – but he was the only elf. What was he doing here? I smelled a rat. But there was only one way to find out what he had on his mind.
“Of course,” I replied with a faked smile. He took my hand as I rose and, guiding me onto the floor, disregarded the current fad and led me into a foxtrot. I silently thanked my mother for her ballroom dance lessons and followed easily.
“What’s an elf doing in a mostly-human country bar?” I shouted up to him. “I thought your race didn’t mix with others?”
Thanks to my high heels, he didn’t have to bend down too far to answer me. “Unlike many of my own, I prefer to mix with all types of people. I find them interesting. You, for example. What’s such a lovely witch doing working for that overly-aromatic ogre?”
Uh-oh. He knew I was a witch. How did he know? I was certain I’d left my “I’m a witch” placard at home. He must have seen the confusion in my eyes. Or maybe smelled it. Or something. I wasn’t certain what capabilities elves had.
“Every paranormal being has a different aura than humans. I can see those auras, as can every other elf. Yours has magic in it.”
Ooookkaayy. They can see auras. So, no hiding what I was from elves. Got it.
“To answer your question,” I hollered. He winced.
“You do not have to shout. I have the ability to filter out the music and hear what you say clearly when we are this close.”
Better hearing than I’d imagined. Filed away for future reference.
“Sorry,” I said in a normal tone of voice. “To answer your question, it’s a job. And a good paying one, at that. Why?”
“I was just wondering. Evander does not seem like a very intelligent being. You do. The two normally do not work well together.”
I smiled. “He doesn’t have skills in some areas, that’s true. But he’s very good at what he does and so am I. We make a good team.” What was this guy after?
“So, it was you who told him not to invest in my company.”
“Not entirely, although I didn’t think it an appropriate investment for him. His financial advisor put the nail in your coffin.”
A frown marred that handsome face. “And who is his investment advisor?”
“I’m sorry,” I frowned back. “Not that it’s a big secret, but Evander’s affairs are his own. It’s not my place to tell you. Perhaps you should ask him.”
The guy might be handsome and a good dancer, but this was getting creepier by the minute. People chose not to invest in companies, startup or not, all the time. Why was he so bothered? I was getting uncomfortable with the whole thing. Thankfully, the song ended, and I was escorted back to the table where Elsa and Louise were sitting with their eyes and mouths wide open.
“Thank you for the dance, Miss McCollum,” Perchaladon bowed. “Perhaps we will do it again sometime.”
As soon as he’d walked away, I heard, “Who was that?” and “How’d you snare a handsome elf when I got a pimply-faced human?” from Elsa and Louise, respectively.
“He tried to get Ev to invest in a company. Ev said no and he just showed up here. Apparently wanting more details than Ev gave him and thinking I’d pony up. I’m glad the song ended. So, how was the human?” I tried to change the subject.
“He stepped on my toes more than once. I thought elves stayed within their own race.”
I was supposed to be out partying, not thinking about work, and was saved by a not-pimply-faced man asking me to dance. I escaped the inquisition – for now.
By eleven, I was yawning. It really was irritating, not being able to stay up late. Louise and Elsa were still enjoying the night, dancing nearly every song with a different guy. I didn’t want to spoil their fun, so I hollered that I was going to take a taxi home and they should stay. They both nodded and waved as I left the table and made my way out to one of the numerous taxi stands around the mall.
As I was walking along the sidewalk, a limo cruised up and the rear window rolled down.
“May I offer you transportation?” Perchaladon said from the back seat. I’d thought he’d left the bar two hours earlier. This was getting creepy.
“No, thank you.” I tried to be polite. “I prefer to take a taxi rather than get into a car with a relative stranger.”
“I can assure you, Miss McCollum, that my kind does not take advantage of a woman when she does not wish it. I am simply offering to share my vehicle with you.”
Yeah, right. He obviously wasn’t like the rest of “his kind.” Therefore, untrustworthy. I said nothing, turned my head away and continued walking. His limo trailed me. I wasn’t sure how elves reacted to magic, but I knew for a fact that the car’s engine wouldn’t work if, somehow, all the dirt in the street made its way into the tailpipe, clogging it.
I was just about to gather all the dirt I could find and magically shove it up the tailpipe when a second limo came screaming around the corner, cut Perchaladon’s limo off and screeched to a halt at the curb, nearly causing the first to rear-end it.
The front window rolled down and I saw Gregory leaning over from the driver’s seat. “Get in. Ev’s in hospital.”
“What?” I yelled as I climbed into the front seat. “What happened?”
I’d barely had time to close the door before Gregory pulled away from the curb and quickly maneuvered his way out of the parking lot.
“He got into a fight with another
ogre at Club Tread. Although weapons aren’t supposed to be allowed, the other guy had a knife and before I could react, he managed to stab Ev in the side, puncturing a lung. It’s not life-threatening but he said he wanted you there when he got out of surgery.”
I clicked my seatbelt and relaxed a little. “How did the knife get past security? And I assume it was over a woman?”
“Of course. But Ev was in the right this time. He was behaving himself. For a change. As to the knife, the head of security is still looking into that. I know Charles. Heads will roll.”
Now that I knew what was happening, I could completely relax. Although Ev usually didn’t get so hurt he needed surgery, this wasn’t his first scrape over a female and probably wouldn’t be the last. One question begged.
“How did you find me?”
“Your mobile. Sorry, Amy, but I’ve had you on my locator application since last year. I wanted every opportunity to keep you safe from anything that went down with Ev.”
In case you didn’t know, one of Ev’s girlfriends went crazy about a year earlier. She wasn’t the first and probably wouldn’t be the last, but that time I got caught up in her madness. She had the weird idea she could take Ev’s company, so she kidnapped him. When I wouldn’t let her do anything, she and her minions kidnapped me and because Fudge was with me at the time, he got taken, too. It was thanks to his abilities that it only took the authorities a day or so to find us.
“Why didn’t you just call?”
“I tried. You didn’t answer.”
I pulled my phone out of my back pocket and looked. I indeed had a missed call, which was weird. I should have felt it vibrate but I obviously didn’t. I ought to have been angry that Gregory had activated the locator function on my phone without asking but instead, I wasn’t bothered by it. I trusted Gregory with my life. Literally.
Thanks to light traffic at that hour, we pulled into the parking lot of St. Aloysius Hospital in about half the time it would have taken on a week day. Given that it was a Saturday night and the police were out in force to catch drunk drivers, I had a sneaking suspicion Gregory had cloaked us so he could grossly exceed the speed limit.
St. Aloysius is the only hospital in the Twin Cities that caters to non-humans. Most paranormals don’t get human illnesses but they do require stitching up, poison treatment, and other medical services. Human doctors don’t know a lot about paranormal physiology, hence the specialty hospital. Because ogres and trolls are frequent patients, nearly everything is oversized to accommodate them. I felt rather tiny, walking through the huge doors.
We were ushered to the waiting room just outside surgery. St. Aloysius may be an atypical hospital, but their coffee was no better than that found at ones for humans. Gregory and I both grimaced as we sucked down enough caffeine to keep us going for a few hours.
An hour or so after our arrival, a man dressed in scrubs came into the room. We were the only ones there, so it wasn’t difficult for him to figure out who to address. “I assume you are here for Mr. Angelich?”
Gregory nodded. “Yes. I am his driver and official next of kin. How’s he doing?”
The doctor raised an eyebrow at the “next of kin,” then chuckled. “Starting to wake up from anesthesia, madder than a hornet, and asking to see you both. Surgery-wise, he’ll be fine. Uncomfortable for a few months but he will heal. Come on. I’ll take you through to recovery.”
The man turned on his heels, presumably expecting us to follow. Which we did.
This wasn’t the first time I’d seen Ev in the hospital and probably wouldn’t be the last but to see him in a hospital bed, hooked up to all sorts of machines with tubes and wires running all over the place was still a shock. He opened his eyes as we walked in the room.
“Did you get that sonofabitch?” he slurred his words.
“Yes, Ev, Charles has him and will deal with it,” Gregory soothed. “You should concentrate on getting well now.”
Ev groaned. “I know I’ll heal. I just can’t believe they let a knife into the club. Or that I got stabbed with it over a woman.”
My thought was that it probably wasn’t the first time that had happened, but I kept it to myself.
“Amy,” he turned to me.
“Ev,” I tried to sound upbeat, “Whatever it is can wait. You need to recover from this.”
“No, it can’t wait,” he mumbled. “Perchaladon…” He fell back asleep.
“He’s going to be out of it for at least twenty-four hours,” the doctor said. “We’ve got him on some pretty hefty painkillers. I suggest you go home and get some sleep. We’ll call you immediately if there are any complications, but I don’t expect any.”
I grabbed Gregory’s arm and headed toward the car. It was now after two o’clock in the morning and even with the coffee, I was almost dead on my feet. With a promise to keep me informed, Gregory dropped me at my apartment and sped off.
“You need to sleep but first you need to feed me.” I knew Fudge knew what had happened by virtue of his always being inside my head but a little sympathy for the situation would have been nice. I told him so.
“Your ogre is always getting into trouble. You should be accustomed to it by now. My food?”
I duly put a scoop of food in his dish, ensured his water was topped off and dragged myself into the bedroom. I didn’t even bother to put my clothes in the hamper, just stripped where I stood and fell into bed.
Once again, I cursed my cat for shredding my drapes. The sun woke me just four hours later. Between that and Ev’s last “Perchaladon,” I couldn’t go back to sleep. At least it was Sunday and I could nap in the afternoon.
While inhaling my coffee, I mused on what could have bothered Ev so much about the elf. I didn’t think Perchaladon was stalking him. Then the more I thought about the previous evening, the more pissed I got. I assumed he’d tracked me down just to ask me those questions, but how? And why?
“Elves are not the nice creatures in your fairy tale books.”
“I know that,” I shot back. “I’m just trying to figure out his angle. If he wanted Ev to invest in his company, it should be Ev he’s stalking, not me. So, why me?”
Fudge yawned and started a bath. “You are not unattractive for a human. Perhaps he is pursuing you romantically. Or not. Time will tell.”
Such a helpful familiar! Not. I knew in my gut it had something to do with business, not romance. I didn’t have enough information to go on, though. Just then, my phone rang. It was Gregory.
“What happened last night before the fight?” I asked after we’d exchanged greetings.
“That’s why I was calling. Perchaladon was at Club Tread last night, harassing Ev about his investment opportunity. Once again, Ev blew him off but it has me concerned. I wanted to know if Ev said anything to you that he didn’t say to me.”
“I don’t think so. You should know, however, that it was Perchaladon’s limo you cut off at the mall last night. And he was in the nightclub I was in.”
“WHAT? Why didn’t you tell me this?”
“Um. Other things on my mind until now. Like Ev?”
I could hear the deep sigh. “Sorry. I haven’t had enough sleep and am on edge. So, tell me now.”
I related the dance, the question game, and then the issue with the limo.
“Why accost you? Ev made the decision not to invest,” Gregory mused.
“I’ve been asking myself the same question. Do elves go bonkers just like humans…or vampires?”
(A crazy vampire had once fixated on me. It wasn’t fun.)
“I honestly don’t know,” was the reply. “Because they tend to keep to themselves, we don’t know a lot about their race. But I rather doubt it. Otherwise, there would be stories and I don’t know any. I’ll ask my contacts. In the meantime, he can’t hurt you as a vampire might so if he comes around again, treat him like you would anyone else of that caliber. I’m going to the hospital to check on Ev. Want to come?”
“Thanks but n
o. He’s just going to want to discuss business and I don’t think that’s good for him at this point. I’ll just keep the home fires burning until he’s able to come back. They can keep him in the hospital even if he wants to leave, right?”
A chuckle and then, “Yes. Well, sort of. They will just keep pumping drugs into him so he sleeps rather than move and possibly tear his stitches. He won’t feel like much for about a week, anyways. Even with his healing abilities, he’s going to be mighty sore. And the doctors can’t do anything magical for him to speed up the process. You’re safe for a bit. I’ll let you know how he’s doing.”
Gregory ended the conversation and my phone immediately rang again. It was Louise.
“Hey, just checking to make sure you’re in one piece today. And what about that mouth-watering hunk of elf?”
I related what had happened after I’d left them.
“Sorry about your boss but knowing ogres, it doesn’t surprise me. And sorry Mr. Handsome is such a creep. Call me if you want him flamed. Or at least a little singed around the edges.”
I ended that conversation with a “will do” and went back to sipping my caffeine. I actually was at loose ends on a Sunday. I had all week to read up on my next magic lesson, no writing deadlines to adhere to, and the house was reasonably clean. Reading, the baseball game, and a long nap sounded ideal.
The following week saw me dealing with all the work – both mine and Ev’s. Because he regularly took off for parts unknown, I was able to fend people off with “he’s out of the office” without saying he’d been hurt and was in the hospital. Sally, my assistant, was even better at blowing folks off. I heard her more than once tell someone, “I don’t know when he’ll be back. If you want an immediate decision, I’ll make one, but I don’t know if it would be the same as Mr. Angelich would make.” Perhaps not the most business-like response but if you knew our clients, you’d know that snark is sometimes the only way to handle them.
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