As Becky returned her attention to her food, Kathryn patted Becky’s hand and said, “Those times will come my child. Let your love for the sea, your love for this man, your wish for a child to raise, keep the darkness far from your soul.”
After lunch, Becky and Walter walked on the beach. I took the opportunity to help Kathryn clean up the lunch dishes and set with her awhile. We drank tea and talked for over an hour. We swapped tales of the sea, stories about my life in New York and her life here on this enchanted island. Kathryn even passed along some recipes that she had stashed in her old tattered cookbook. I took the time to copy down a recipe for campfire brownies and a couple more for fish seasonings. The woman was an incredible storyteller. She told me two stories of the sea that made my sides hurt from laughing.
When Becky and Walter returned, they came ashore paddling the dinghy. They pulled the raft up to the house and tied it to a metal lamppost so it would not blow away in the wind during the night. As they walked up to the recreational vehicle, Becky slid her arm inside of Walter’s and talked to him like as if he was her father. I could feel the love she had for this wonderful man she had met. I looked at Kathryn and said, “It is good that Becky spends some time with Walter. She often needs a strong male shoulder to ward off the darkness that sometimes possesses her soul.” Kathryn patted my hand and said, “I think the hard times in Becky’s life are past. She now takes comfort in your love for her and your ability to be at ease with her occasional dark side. She will be okay, just give her time to heal the loneliness that has filled her heart since her father’s death.”
Chapter 35 – Cape Lookout
As Becky and I sailed away from Bimini Island and left our newly found friends behind, I felt a little sad that we would never see them again. They were good people. For some unknown reason, I felt that Kathryn had looked deep into Becky’s soul and had seen an image of herself. As we sailed this morning, I had the distinct feeling that when Becky spoke words about her darkness to Kathryn, the darkness that existed in Becky’s mind came to the surface: brought out into the light of day. Kathryn had drug the darkness from Becky’s mind, as if she had entered and drug it out kicking and screaming. The light in Becky’s eyes now glistened as she walked up to me and wrapped her arms around my neck. I felt her trying to hide her emotions, trying not to cry; but she could not remain calm, there was a new light coming from within her. A light brightly lit by her love of life, her love for the sea, and her love for me.
When we entered the deep waters, Becky said, “We need about seven days to reach Chesapeake Bay. I just checked and the temperature at the marina where we plan to dock is forty degrees Fahrenheit. I am anxious to feel the cold. I have not been that far north in many years.” I chuckled and said, “You may not be so excited when the first snowflakes chill your cheeks.” Becky thought about the possibility of snow and said, “We have warm clothing. I will welcome the snow.”
As we sailed on, the temperature began to drop, especially at night. For the first time during this voyage, we opened up the two cupboards that contained our warm clothing. The cameras had temperature sensors built in. This gave us an easy method of keeping track of the water temperature around the vessel, but did not help us determine the temperature on deck. During the day, we would sit out on deck in the sunlight and be very comfortable, but as the sun began to set, the temperature would quickly drop. Becky walked up to me one evening, dressed in her warm clothes and said, “I actually do like cold weather, having silky long underwear against my bare skin feels perfectly heavenly.” I chuckled and said, “Are you telling me that you have no panties on under that underwear?” She giggled and said, “I refuse to answer that question. A lady does not have to reveal what she is wearing under her cold weather clothing.”
Just before dark, I checked the air temperature on the deck. It was just above freezing. We decided to spend the night below the surface if we could find a place to sit the Pacifica-Two down safely. I checked the water depth and realized it was only ninety feet deep. Then I checked the sonar and discovered that we were on a sandy area with only a few rocks. We quickly took down the sails and stored them in the cabin. Within twenty minutes, we were diving towards the bottom. As we settled in the sand, we rolled a little. I heard Becky gasp as I blew a little water out of the starboard ballast tanks and leveled out the Pacifica-Two. Once we settled in the sand and leveled out, Becky checked the water temperature outside the vessel. The fish finder showed the temperature to be, sixty-seven degrees Fahrenheit. She laughed and said, “That is better. I can sleep comfortably at this temperature.”
We fixed some food and sat at our tiny eating table. Becky said, “I put a bottle of red wine in the cold box yesterday, would you care to join me. I think a little wine might relax us and allow me to show you how much I love you. The time we spent with Walter and Kathryn in their home, showed me how two peoples love for each other can grow stronger with each passing day. They live the fairy tale life I wish for you and I. Barbie and Ken living and loving into eternity. I hope that our love remains strong and stands the test of time.”
I kissed her and pulled the cork out of the wine bottle. I poured two glasses and sat back down across from her so I could look into her eyes. I put my hand on Becky’s and asked, “Can we talk about the words you spoke with Kathryn, when you mentioned you hoped we could one day adopt a child to raise as our own.” I saw Becky look down at her wine glass and fidget in her seat. Finally, she looked up at me and said, “Sorry for saying things we have not discussed. Maybe tonight is a good time for that discussion. Stanley, I love you very much and I realize that we both want to live on the sea as long as our bodies allow, but I would like the discussions to begin about having a child in our lives. I was and still am very glad you had the vasectomy. I do not want to push a child from my belly, however, I do think often about a child in my life to love. I think a child in our lives would draw our love for each other even closer. I ....”
Becky again looked down and began squirming around, trying hard to find words to speak, trying hard to explain her feelings. She took both of my hands in hers and said, “I have kept certain things about me from you. I hate now speaking of having kept secrets from my husband, but I must now tell you everything. When Kathryn and I talked, she guessed my secret. It was as if she could look into my mind and sort out the truth. I will now tell you that truth. It is a story that will not change our love for each other, but it may make you angry that I kept the secret from you.”
Becky took a moment and refilled our wine glasses. She sipped a tiny bit and then put the glass down on the table. She looked up into my eyes and said, “I have a condition with my uterus. I have a band of tissue dividing my uterus. The band has little or no blood flow. It causes me only minor problems with my monthly cycles, but it does cause pain at times that should not accompany my period. I did not discover the true nature of my monthly pain until a few weeks after my father’s death. I guess the emotional stress of his death caused the problem to get worse. When I went to a new doctor, she did some ultrasound studies and found what was causing the problem. The band is wide enough that the doctors did not recommend surgery. Instead, they suggested I try to cope with the pain or have a hysterectomy. The problem is not bad enough for me to risk major surgery, so I deal with the problem when it occurs. With all that said, I now come to the crux of the problem. This uterine septum causes miscarriages if a fertilized egg tries to attach anywhere on or near the septum. There is a chance I could get pregnant, as you have seen, but the chance of carrying a child to term is very slim with the size of my septum. I did not intend to get pregnant without having this discussion with you, but the point became moot after the birth control pills failed. Now, as I see it, this is the problem. When I married you, I knew of this problem but I did not tell you then. I don’t know why, I just didn’t. When Kathryn and I talked in the gazebo, I realized the woman knew why I had miscarried. She seemed to read my mind or something. Anyways, at that point, I kn
ew I had to discuss this with you and come clean.”
I watched Becky take a deep breath and slump down a little in her chair. I could see her mind relax. She had cleared her conscious and felt better. I reached across the table and took her hand in mine. I said, “None of this causes me any serious problem or gives me reason to toss you into the sea. As I see it, your pain is the only thing at this point that is an issue and I am certain the doctors can help you deal with that. I love you as you are. I love you unconditionally and it matters little if you kept this information from me.”
I poured Becky a little bit more wine and said, “We were discussing adopting a child. Can we begin that discussion again? I would love to begin the process after we complete this voyage, and possibly before we set out on our next adventure.” I watched Becky begin to smile. She did not say anything for a moment and then finally found the words she needed. She said, “We can discuss that while we make love tonight.”
By the time we began turning west into Long Island Sound, we had snow blowing into our faces. We had begun wearing our warm clothing and dry suits two days ago. We both feared falling into the cold Atlantic without our wet suits and life jackets. We even began using our lanyards to ensure we could not fall into the water in the first place. The windblown water was not so cold by itself, but when the water hit the cold air, it quickly chilled any exposed skin.
It took us almost an hour to get to the marina. We had called ahead and made arrangements to have the Pacifica-Two placed into warm storage while we visited New York. As we motored into the boat yard, the yardman talked to us on the marine radio and guided us into a long canal that appeared to pass completely through the huge building. When the linemen tied us up, they quickly moved a huge crane over us and lowered a metal rack until it was about six feet over the Pacifica-Two. Then they began moving huge nylon slings under us until they had six of them securely supporting the Pacifica-Two in the water. Once they were certain they had properly supported the load, they began lifting us out of the water.
They moved the huge ceiling crane across the shop until we rested over a second canal. Then they lowered us down, carefully tying our vessel so the planes could not touch the sides of the canal. Once they had securely tied our vessel, they rolled a large set of stairs up to the deck. One of the men came up to the deck and talked to us. He explained that we needed to unhook the batteries. He also took our diesel and white gas cans down and sat them on the floor on a wooden pallet. Once we were ready, we carried our backpacks and clothing tote bags down the ladder, and then I went back up the ladder and locked both hatch doors. When I returned, Becky had written our names and cell phone numbers on a large tag with a felt tip pen. The man fastened the tag to the hull ladder so our names and phone numbers were visible. He also wrote the pallet number for our fuel tanks on the tag.
When we stepped out into the office area, a woman asked us the name of the hotel where we were staying. Becky produced the name and phone number from her cell phone. The woman picked up the phone and made the call. When she hung up, she said, “A hotel shuttle will arrive in about twenty minutes. May I offer you some coffee or a soda?” She directed us to the coffee pot and Becky poured two cups. We figured the stuff would be awful, but someone had just recently made it. It actually tasted rather good.
When the shuttle arrived, we loaded our four backpacks into the back and headed to our hotel. The drive took us only twenty minutes, even in the heavy traffic. As we unloaded our stuff and walked into the hotel, the rain began to come down hard. We stood in line to check in for about five minutes, the place was rather busy.
Once we finished the paperwork and walked down the hall to our room, we realized that our room was just a few steps from the pool.
Once we had settled into our room, I called my daughter, Dawn. I had not talked to her for a couple months now. She knew we were sailing to New York, but had no idea when we would arrive. I called her cell phone number, but did not get an answer, so I left a short message. I had barely laid the phone down on the table when it rang. When I picked it up, I heard a very excited voice on the line. Dawn asked where we were staying and I told her. She said, “I get off work in twenty minutes and the hotel is only ten blocks from my office. I will hug you in a few minutes.” I gave her the room number and she hung up. I saw a look on my wife’s face that I knew meant tears. I walked over to her and hugged her. She said, “I am excited to finally meet Dawn.” She put her head on my shoulder, but managed to keep the tears inside.
When I heard a knock on the hotel room door, I opened it and saw my daughter’s face staring back at me. She looked beautiful. I invited her in and introduced her to Becky. As the two women were hugging, I realized that my daughter had a little excess belly hanging over her belt. Not much, but enough to make me wonder if she no longer had time to exercise, or if she might be.... I decided not to think about it any further.”
As we talked for a few minutes about where we had stored the Pacifica-Two and how long we planned to stay, Dawn said, “You two must come stay with Henry and me. We have lots of room and you will love my man.” She turned to face me and said, “Father, Henry is going to be a Father, just like you are.” It took me a second, but I soon caught on. She wrapped her arms around my neck and cried. When she stepped back, Becky handed her a tissue and then hugged her. Dawn said, “Father, Becky, would you come stay with us while you are here in New York. There is no reason for you to stay in this stuffy hotel when you can be on the beach where you will be comfortable. We have an extra car that you can use while you are here. I simply must call Henry right now and tell him you are here. Can you join us for supper tonight? We just put a side of beef in the freezer so we can have steak tonight to celebrate your arrival.” Then she looked at me and said, “Maybe you two had other plans. I don’t mean to intrude.” Becky said, “We have two plans for this trip to New York. You, Henry, and now this child are first on the list.”
Dawn said, “I know you have paid for this room, but you could simply put the door keys on the table and load your stuff into my Jeep. The entire second floor of the mansion is empty and lonely. Your presence there would be wonderful.” Becky looked at me with a smile and said, “Let me consider this. We either stay here in this noisy hotel or go stay with family at their mansion. I guess I have made up my mind.” She walked over to the bed and began packing her things into her tote. I heard Dawn giggle. Then she looked at me and said, “Becky and I are going to get along just fine. I like her attitude.” I rolled my eyes and said, “Wait until you piss her off once.” Dawn began to laugh and said, “I seem to remember that my father had quite the attitude at times, or has he changed?” Becky turned around and said, “He has mellowed, but only a little. I recently saw his personality change instantly when a Coast Guard Officer basically called him a liar and a drug smuggler.” Dawn said, “I guess no punches were thrown or you two would have been calling me for my legal services.” I looked at my daughter and said, “I would never have hit him, but he might have accidently stumbled and fell overboard.” Dawn said, “That’s the Father I remember.”
As we turned into the long winding driveway of Dawn’s home, we realized that the place was truly a mansion. It was two stories tall and built from beautifully colored bricks. When Becky commented on the bricks, Dawn explained that the school district had torn down the high school that Henry attended and he had purchased the bricks to build this home. Then she said, “I met Henry when I started working for a law firm in town. Soon after, we decided to start our own law firm. Today we have six additional attorneys and an office staff of five. We seem to stay very busy in this town.”
As we began unloading our stuff from the Jeep, Dawn asked me if I had talked to her mom recently. I smiled and said, “No. I have nothing to argue about so I do not call her. I would love to see her, but I cannot deal with her negative attitude towards life.” Dawn said, “She calls me quite often, usually to bitch about someone that has done her wrong. I try to keep the conversa
tions short, but the woman can rattle on for hours about nothing. I do love her, but I cannot stand to be around her.”
As we entered Dawn’s home, a woman met us at the door. She stood beside Dawn, talked to us about our trip and then offered to take our bags to our room. I picked up three of them and allowed her to carry one. As we started up the stairs, Dawn said, “Hold on a minute. I have not introduced everyone.” As she introduced Becky and me, she addressed the woman as Julie. Then she said, “Julie has worked for me for a couple years now and without her help, this home would be a total disaster. I could not manage without her. When this child is born, I am going to photocopy Julie so she has some quality help.”
As I climbed the stairs behind Julie, I realized how magnificent this home really was. There were four large bedrooms on the second floor, each with their own bathroom and shower. The place was immaculately clean and carefully decorated. I smiled to myself over how well my daughter was doing, despite her mother’s constant interference.
When I went back down to join the ladies, Henry was just driving into the driveway. When he stepped into the kitchen, he walked up to me and said, “You must be Dawn’s Father. I can see the resemblance in your eyes.” I turned as Dawn said, “I hope you approve of each other.” Henry looked me up and down and I walked around him once. When we both faced each other again, I said, “Yea, I guess he will do.” Henry grabbed my arm and pulled me in for a man hug. When we parted, Becky stepped up behind me. I moved around so she was standing beside me and said, “This fine lady goes by the name of Becky. She is a mechanical engineer and has degrees that I cannot even pronounce.” Henry hugged her and said, “I see why you married her. She is not only very smart, but soft and cuddly also.”
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