“Uncle Adam?” Dani screams from the other room. “Auntie Leah?”
I push Adam away tugging my shirt down, and he starts laughing. I jump off the counter and scramble to turn on the shower water.
“You have to go this time.” He adjusts himself in his jeans.
“Yeah, I guess I do.” I look down at the hardness pressing against the fabric and smile.
“Just go get your niece, everything will be fine after I take a shower.” He playfully tosses a washcloth at me. “And, Leah?”
I turn my head over my shoulder.
“This isn’t over.” He pulls his pants down and steps in the shower.
Surprise, his ass is just as amazing as everything else on him.
The warm water showers over me, rinsing the shampoo off my short hair, but it can’t wash away the image of Leah’s nipple. Thank God for small favors! I should’ve known they would be flawless, like the rest of her. I was skeptical on how she would be this morning; if she would regret what happened last night or not, but taking my cue from this morning, it’s all good.
Wrapping a towel around myself, I hear Dani screaming and jumping on the bed. Leah is asking her to be quiet and stop jumping, but Dani seems to be ignoring her. On the toilet is a stack of my clothes. Leah must have snuck them in. God, she’s awesome. I hurry to shrug my clothes on and get out to help her with the little girl.
“Uncle Adam.” Dani jumps from one bed to the next and then into my arms.
“Whoa, girl,” I say. “Calm down, we’re in a hotel.”
“I thought you left us last night,” she says, wrapping her arms around my neck.
“Never, sweetheart. Let’s get you dressed and go get some breakfast, so Auntie Leah can get ready,” I tell her.
“K,” she says, jumping from the bed to the floor.
“DANI!” Leah and I say firmly in unison, but she looks at us like we have three heads.
The meticulous Leah already has Dani’s clothes laid out on the bed, so I dress her and try to comb her hair. Then Leah shakes her head and laughs when I try to put it up in a ponytail. It has so many bumps and humps she looks as though she had after prom hair. Leah takes the comb out of my hand and does Dani’s hair in a big ponytail and then places clips on each side. Smiling, she gives me back the comb.
“Show off,” I tease.
“Years of practice,” she says as she strolls into the bathroom with her clothes to get ready. God, I wish I could follow her.
“Let’s go, Uncle Adam.” Dani grabs my hand and pulls me off the bed.
“Okay, okay.” I exaggerate her pulling me and pretend to be thrown across the room, which makes her uncontrollably laugh. I love that sound.
Since we have more time than yesterday, we go down to the restaurant and eat breakfast, just the two of us. Dani has pancakes that are more like a dessert with whipped cream and chocolate chips, and I have a Denver omelet and coffee. Dani tells me all about her and Leah swimming last night, and I’m pissed at myself for missing it. I promise her I’d be there tonight with her, and that I’ll never leave them again.
We get back to the room, and Leah is all ready to go. She surprises me that she’s able to look gorgeous without taking forever. Her smile falters when I hand the to-go cup to her.
“Sorry, I don’t drink coffee,” she reveals, placing it on the table.
“It’s not coffee.” I raise my eyebrow.
“What is it?” she questions.
“Tea, peppermint tea, right?”
“How did you know?” Her lips turn upward with surprise in her eyes.
“I saw the k-cups on your counter,” I admit.
“Very observant, Mr. McAllister. Thank you.” She kisses me on my cheek.
Check for, Adam. I’ll win her over before today is over.
I’m still smiling when we enter family therapy. Shane met us in the parking lot again and said he’d take care of Dani. Adam entwines our hands, leading the way as we follow the posted signs. His tight squeeze feels so right it scares me. When we enter the room, other family members, mostly parents from what I can tell, linger around the coffee and snack station, quietly talking to each other. Adam releases my hand and ushers me to two vacant seats. Sipping my tea, he shrugs off his jacket and places it on the back of the chair. “Do you want anything?” he asks, and I shake my head. My eyes follow him as he makes his way, letting others in front of him. He politely grabs a coffee and a slice of bread before he returns. Once in his seat, he glances my way and lips curl up. “What?” he mumbles, eating his slice of banana bread.
“Nothing,” I say, smiling.
He takes a sip of his coffee and leans over to my ear. “I can’t stop envisioning you in that towel last night. Or, shall I say, without the towel,” he whispers, making shivers crawl up my neck. He pulls back, and his eyes travel my body. “I love it when I make you do that.”
“Do what?” I ask.
“Bring those goose bumps right here over your neck.” He looks around and then kisses me just under my earlobe, sparking a new stream of them. “It lets me know the effect I have on you.”
I refrain from any other conversation, but I’m pretty sure he understands exactly the effect he has on me. Luckily, the group leader, Gayle, walks in a few seconds later. She’s a tall redhead that looks friendly but tough. That if you cross her, she’ll make sure you pay. I don’t intend to do that.
She welcomes everyone, referring to some by names. How many times have these people been here? There’s one older couple, Greg and Tina, who appear like their old friends of Gayle’s. She hugs them, and they chat about the family and other intimate things. It scares the crap out of me to think this could become that comfortable of a place. She eventually takes the chair in the front of the room and begins to situate herself.
Adam’s hand slides over and squeezes my knee, and I glance over to find a very supportive Adam. His kind eyes tell me everything I need to know; he’ll be here for me the whole time. Gayle takes her pen and pad out, placing them on the table besides her.
“Hello, everyone,” she says, and the group mumbles their pleasantries back. “So, for some of you this is the first family session. I want to remind everyone, nothing leaves this room. With that said, let’s introduce ourselves.” She motions her hand toward Greg and Tina.
Like old pros they say, “I’m Greg, my son died from a drug overdose, and my daughter is an addict.” Then he turns to his wife, and she repeats the same line, inputting her name. Adam’s hand goes limp on my leg when Greg and Tina announce the loss of their son. I place my hand on his immediately and squeeze tightly.
By the time the room gets around to us, Adam goes first. “Hi, I’m Adam, my sister died of a drug overdose.” No one even blinks an eye, as though it’s just a matter of fact around here. He turns to me, and I swallow, unsure if I can do this. Adam nods his head once more, giving me the courage to.
“Hi, I’m Leah, my brother is an addict,” I admit, and like with everyone else, the room remains silent. I have to say, it’s liberating announcing it to a group of strangers. A secret I’ve kept hidden most of my life. A secret I’ve lied about the last few years, and with one sentence all that weight seems to lift off my shoulders.
After the introductions, Gayle asks if anyone wants to share. Greg and Tina talk about their twin children, one died of an overdose and the other still struggling with her addiction. At one point, Adam’s elbows lean on his knees as he intently listens to their story. From Greg’s body movements, he notices Adam’s attentiveness.
About midway through, Gayle announces a break, and Greg and Tina come over to Adam. He chats with them, and they exchange information. They’re from the Milwaukee area, and Adam asks if they would be willing to meet his parents. His poor parents, they should be up here, too. Gayle joins them and adds in information about weekend group therapy sessions for dealing with the loss of an addict. She hands Adam a few brochures, and he takes them, shoving them in his back pocket. It appears
that a weight has been lifted off him, as well. I should know what therapy can do for someone. Isn’t that the reason I’m studying to become a therapist?
Four hours later, I swear Adam and I walk out two different people. When we meet up with Shane and Dani, Adam’s hand stiffens on my back the minute they come into view. I know it’s not Dani that brings that reaction out of Adam, so I have to remind myself, baby steps. They don’t shake hands hello, but do acknowledge the presence with head nods.
“Hey, Dani, did you have fun today?” Adam asks and squats down to her eye level.
“Daddy and I fed some ducks and took a walk. We played moo?”
“Uno Moo, honey,” Shane corrects her and starts laughing.
“Uno Moo,” she repeats and smiles so big she’s showing all her little teeth.
“It sounds like a fun day,” I assert, and she nods. You can see the love in her eyes for her dad. I need to give Shane a chance to work this out without allowing my fears to taint his progress. That maybe this is exactly what he needs to get clean.
“So, how was today?” Shane asks.
“Good, a lot of helpful information.” I glance over to Adam, and he nods in agreement.
“That’s good, tomorrow will be even better, since you’ll get some addicts perception,” he informs us, and a grunt leaks out of Adam.
“Perception on what?” Adam sneers.
“For you guys to realize that we’re remorseful and want to make amends,” Shane replies, pulling back his excitement a little. Shane’s eagerness to this whole new world surprises me, but he’s always able to bullshit people.
“Huh,” Adam murmurs next to me, and Shane looks at me with uncertainty.
Knowing we all need to separate for a while, and Shane is due for dinner, I start our goodbyes.
“Daddy, come back with us,” Dani whines.
“I’m sorry, sweetie, I can’t.” He hugs her, but she fights him.
“Why?”
“Remember, we talked about how I need to get better. I have to stay a little longer, and then I’ll never leave you again.” He pulls her in, and she allows him, wrapping her small arms tightly around his neck.
Shane’s eyes are shut so tight, as though he’s desperately trying not to cry in front of her. “I love you, Daddy,” she says, and he whispers what I assume is I love you in her ear. It’s a heartbreaking scene, and, as much as I wish I could make it better for both of them, I’m hoping this is what Shane needs, that the yearning for Dani will keep him sober and clean. It just sucks my niece, who is too little to understand, has to endure the pain.
Shane secures Dani in her car seat and gives her one more kiss goodbye. After he shuts the door, I see the tear falling down his cheek.
“Thanks, Leah.” He hugs me just as tight as Dani, so I reciprocate. With a wave of his hand to Adam, he walks back into the building without as much of a glance back to the car.
Adam starts the car, and when I realize he hasn’t pulled out, I look over. His attention is on me. “He’ll be okay, Leah,” Adam reminds me, but I’m not so sure he will be. Depression is what got Shane into drugs in the first place.
We stop at a family diner for dinner. Dani talks about all the other kids in the daycare at The Meadows. I guess there’s some boy named Jackson that she played with the most. Adam’s eyes widen in my direction, and I laugh at his overprotectiveness. The conversation is easy and fun, hopefully, allowing Dani to forget her dad isn’t with us.
Adam and I are also enjoying each other, as well as our common bond—Dani. Discretely, grabbing my ass or touching my lower back when Dani isn’t looking as I get in and out of the car. Once he snuck a kiss to the back of my neck, creating goose bumps that engulfed my whole body, just how he likes them to.
Dani begs to go to the pool as soon as we arrive at the hotel. It’s all I can do to get us to the room to put my suit on before she’s opening the door to head to the pool. When I come out of the bathroom, Adam’s eyes bulge out and a happy smile encases his lips. Purposely walking by him and bending over to search in my purse, just to hear his reaction. I’m loving the grumbles he can’t hold in.
Dani jumps out into the hallway and begins skipping down the hall before Adam and I can file out of the room. “You look so fucking hot,” he whispers in my ear as he comes up behind me.
“Thank you.” A flush of heat radiates within me, just from having him so near. I love the way Adam makes me feel sexy and beautiful with just one look.
We walk side by side, as close as we can with Dani leading us. Occasionally, his fingers graze against mine, making my stomach somersault. Just like last night, the smell of chlorine leads our way. There’s only one family in the pool area again tonight. The mom sits in one of the plastic chairs, polishing her nails while the dad and older kids dive for sticks. A flashback of Shane and I diving for pennies with my dad arises from my memory.
Adam doesn’t wait, but jumps into the pool doing a cannonball, and Dani squeals at the big splash it makes. He motions for her to jump in to him, and she follows his directions with no hesitation. I sit on the side for a while, observing Adam teaching Dani to swim. I hate to admit it, but he’s more successful than me.
“Come on, Leah…it’s heated,” Adam says, trying to coax me in.
“Yeah, come in,” Dani yells.
“You have a beautiful family,” the woman beside me says from the next table over.
“Oh…well, actually…thank you.” I don’t want to explain the situation. People never understand it.
“She’s a perfect mix between you two. She’s adorable,” she says, blowing on her nails to dry them.
“Thank you. I guess she is, isn’t she?” I look at Dani, and I guess the woman is right. She has my curly hair and Adam’s deep-set eyes. She could easily be confused as our child. She and Adam are so identical, they could be father daughter. I quietly imagine my life with Adam and a child identical to Dani. I visualize my life filled with lots of laughter and fun. Am I falling for Dani’s uncle? With that thought, I don’t fight my nerves, but instead hop into the pool with my family and dip down until my body completely submerges in the water, leading my mind to stop wavering. When I break through the surface, Adam and Dani are laughing and hugging me. I realize I’ve been lying to myself. I’m not falling for Adam. I’ve already fallen.
I’m just teasing myself with the little touches to Leah. Luckily, Dani fell asleep quickly tonight, and Leah joined me in my bed. I’m surprised she came on her own accord, but I’m not about to argue it. We rent some romantic comedy flick on the television, and she snuggles into my arms. What I wouldn’t do to take her right now, but cuddling will have to suffice for the time being.
I thought I’d won the lottery when she opened that bathroom door and strutted out in that blue bikini. Low enough to see curves, but enough fabric to leave me to my own imagination, which took off like a jet off of an aircraft carrier. I pretended not to hear the woman complimenting Leah at the pool, but I heard her. Check two for, Adam. She shocked me when she jumped into the water, though. I love this carefree side Leah is starting to reveal to me.
She squirms, bringing me back the present, which I should be enjoying immensely. Her arms are wrapped around my waist, and her hands are tucked under my shirt, so they lay flat against my bare skin. I rub her shoulder and allow my finger to roam up and down her arm. Nothings ever felt better than this, us being a couple. It’s been so long, I forgot how much I enjoy being close to someone else.
Unfortunately, the responsible part of my head keeps knocking, reminding me that there’s an issue that could take this away or stop it from continuing. I brace myself to ask, “Leah, I want to ask you something, and if you don’t want to talk about it, I understand. I’m just curious.”
She scoots up, and my stomach feels cold without her touch. “What is it?” she asks.
“Your parents…how did they die?” I take her hand in mine as a way to comfort her.
“Oh, I suppose that’
s something we never discussed, huh?” she says it so casually, it floors me.
“If you don’t want—”
She interrupts me, “It’s fine, Adam. It’s been long enough that I’ve come to grips with it.”
I sit there in silence, waiting her to continue.
She tries to take her hand away from mine, no doubt to pick at her skin, but I grip harder. Her eyes flash to mine in anger, but then she relents. “My dad died when I was ten. He was driving at night. Another vehicle crossed the line and hit him head on. He died on impact.”
“I’m sorry, Leah.” I squeeze her hand, to console her, but there’s no sadness in her eyes. More like hatred or indifference, I can’t tell which.
“Don’t be, it’s his own fault.” She shrugs. I guess it’s indifference.
“What do you mean? I thought you said another car crossed the line.
“They did, on purpose,” she says.
I scrunch my eyebrows; she’s completely lost me.
“It was his mistress that killed him. Well, one of his mistresses.”
“Oh.” I have no idea how to respond.
“I didn’t find out until I was older and started putting it all together. My dad was a successful businessman and a habitual cheater. He had different women throughout my parents’ marriage. He would date them for a couple months and then discard them for someone new. Buy them expensive things, take them on business trips with him, but when he was done, he just threw them to the side like trash.” She’s sitting up in front of me on the bed with her legs folded, focusing on the ugly comforter below us. She avoids any eye contact with me while reaching over to the nightstand for her bottle of water. Unscrewing the top, she swallows a sip before continuing.
“Bridget was his latest conquest. He dated her for almost a year, which was, believe it or not, long for him. He bought her a car and a house. Pretty much keeping her happy. She ended up getting pregnant, and he told her to abort the baby, because he didn’t want it. So, she agreed, and then he broke it off. She was so emotionally unstable; she followed him to a hotel that evening and saw him with another woman. In revenge, she purposely crossed the line to kill them both. At least, that’s what the police surmise based on her diary entries leading up to the accident and the evidence at the scene. There were no skid marks from her car, and she’d had an outburst at the hotel that night. Numerous hotel employees put on record that she threatened his life.” She begins plucking at her jeans with her available hand.
Familiar Ground Page 17