I didn’t think I was capable of premeditated murder, but what they had done had made me think everybody had a breaking point.
I was done thinking about revenge, it was getting too much. I decided to go for a walk only to fall down a few steps away from the door to the hallway. I bit my tongue. I had no interest in being chastised for being a petulant child who didn’t know what her limitations were.
I crawled back to the bed and stopped at the window to pull myself back up to a standing position. My knees hurt from the impact and there was no hiding the bruises that were going to form in less than 24 hours.
I looked out at the twinkling lights in the distance and knew somewhere out there my husband was sleeping soundly with my sister right beside him. I could only hope they weren’t sleeping in the same bed we had consummated our vows in. I didn’t want to believe they could be that callous.
It was nice to see the moon and I had forgotten what it was like to breathe fresh air through the open window. The air was fresh and cold. It was refreshing. The moon was full and bright, casting a warm glow on every surface it touched. It felt like my legs were about to collapse out from underneath me. I lowered myself on my knees and crawled like a baby trying to find her first steps. My knees were killing me.
I got back in bed just in time for the nurse to peek in during her rounds. I knew in the back of my mind there was no way I could possibly keep the secret of being awake for much longer.
“I have to say it was amusing watching you.” This time it was his voice making me jump out of my skin. I guess two could play the same game.
“You scared me half to death. I just got out of a coma and I really have no interest in going back in. Do you always sit in the dark like some kind of specter in the night?” I could have died from the fright of having a stranger in my room at this time of night. I wanted to ask how he had gotten inside, but I had a feeling Dr. Benton was the benefactor of his presence.
“I was going to say something, but I thought it best to see how far you were going to get on your own.” I had closed my eyes, but somehow he had walked into the room without me even being aware he was there.
“Why are you here so late?” The window was fluttering the curtain and I could hear it flapping in the breeze.
He made a sigh of resignation like he had been defeated and had no idea how to rally back to claim what was left of his life. It seemed important not to rush him. I had to let him talk in his own time.
“I was worried about you, and I came here for some advice. I shouldn’t put you in this position, but you’ve always been there for me in the past. Talking to you helped me to figure things out.” I turned on the bedside lamp with a flick of my finger.
His eyes were sunken and it didn’t look like he was able to sleep. He was surprisingly alert. I wanted to tell him he could tell me anything without judgment, but I wasn’t sure how true that really was.
“I don’t know how much help I will be, but I’m willing to hear you out.” It must be some kind of sign. He obviously knew he was doing something wrong to elicit my advice. He scooted forward with the chair legs scratching across the white tiled floor.
He lowered his hands onto his lap and then he raised them like he was praying for a higher power to come to the rescue. He looked despondent, completely at his wit’s end.
“I don’t want to get you involved. By saying anything you would become complicit after the fact. Implicating you in this would be asking too much. I’ll tell you what I can without revealing all the details. This way you will have plausible deniability.” It sounded reasonable and I was ready to hear his confession.
“I did something tonight I’m not very proud of. It was technically illegal, but it wasn’t like I was hurting anybody. I will say it was like stepping into a comfortable pair of old shoes. They might’ve been broken in, but I haven’t worn them in quite some time.” It sounded like he had resorted back to the very reason why he had disappeared from his mother’s life for three years.
“You’re telling me something and nothing at the same time. If I didn’t know any better, I would swear you were a politician giving me false platitudes to get my vote. You better not shake my hand or I swear I will kick you where the sun doesn’t shine.” He cringed momentarily with the very idea I could do something like that.
“I don’t mean to be frustrating. This would have been different had you been sleeping like every other time I’ve come to see you at this time of night. I know I shouldn’t be here, but talking to you makes me feel like I can be a better man.” I didn’t want him to give me that kind of power over his future. He could be a better man, I had faith in him.
“Let’s go for a walk, some fresh air would do you, actually both of us a lot of good. Would you help me?” He raised a finger like a light bulb had gone off over his head.
“I have an idea.” He ran out of the room like his pants were on fire and came back triumphantly dragging in a wheelchair in front of them.
He was having problems unlocking the brakes. I was going to suggest how to do it, but I didn’t want to emasculate him. It would’ve been a blow to his ego. He had gone out of his way to help me.
He was cursing underneath his breath. He got his hand caught in the lever and it was painfully pinching his skin. He had to stick his finger in his mouth to soothe away the pain. It was a little childish, but also fun to watch.
“It can’t be this hard. I’m trying to do something gallant and it’s backfiring in my face. I don’t see anything remotely funny about this. Do you see me laughing?” I didn’t mean it, but from my point of view, it was a hilarious thing to see.
“Oh come on. This is the first time I have found a reason to smile about anything. You did the one thing the doctors and the staff here in this place hasn’t been able to do.” He wasn’t about to give up on the wheelchair even though it seemed to have his number.
“I won’t let this damn wheelchair get the best of me.” It took almost five minutes, but he finally jumped up and down with the small victory of getting the brakes unlocked. It was a funny sight.
He wasn’t even thinking when he picked me up and lowered me into it without even asking my permission. He tipped it back and made me gasp out loud at his audacity. He stopped momentarily to open the door. For the first time, I was getting a look at more than the four walls in my room.
The place was clinical with no real life in the halls. The only sound was the elevator moving with the skeleton crew who stalked the hallways. I could hear the faint sound of vacuum cleaners and the lingering sounds of the janitors wringing water out of the mop bucket.
“Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. It’s depressing. If I didn’t feel like jumping out of the window already then this is certainly going to push me in that direction.” He wasn’t about to give up.
“I have a place that I want to show you.” The elevator opened and the young woman chewing on what looked like a chicken salad sandwich merely stared at us.
She never said one word and we were trying not to laugh. It would have made her feel awkward. The doors closed and we went into a hysterical fit until I was almost crying.
The door opened and there was a set of stairs going to the roof. He tried desperately to lift the wheelchair one step at a time. He was out of breath by the time he got to the third step.
“I don’t think I thought this through.” He looked dejected and I wanted to do something to make all of his hard work pay off.
“Why don’t you carry me the rest of the way? I’m far lighter than the wheelchair coming along with me.”
“Damn…I am not usually this stupid. Why didn’t I think of that?” Without any effort, he swept me out of the wheelchair and into his arms.
He held me steadily in his arms while I opened up the door to the roof. He brought me over to the edge and let me down on my feet to wobble in place. The vastness of night sky and the blinking stars gave me the impression I was a small cog in a big wheel.
“I’m
glad you shared with me this special place of yours.”
“I’m not delusional. The cigarette butts takes away the illusion of this being some untouched piece of paradise. I see things differently when I come up here. It does make you feel insignificant in the grand scheme of things.”
“I do understand. My story is just one of many out there playing out every single day.” There was no doubt in my mind the staff had come up here on occasion to smoke and get away from it all.
He had his arms around me keeping me from falling, but it was already too late. I was falling for him in a big way. The way he held me as though my body was meant to be in the embrace, cradled by his muscular arms. I was holding close that I could smell him, a clean and fresh scent. His five o’clock shadow, the gold flecks in his blue eyes when I looked up at him.
For some reason, I felt like I was betraying my ex-husband. I had nothing to apologize for. He had gotten this ball rolling by getting divorced. I could have thrown myself at Travis willingly without reservations. But Travis deserved better than being my rebound guy.
The silence was making it easier to think. I had to keep my feelings to myself. I had no idea if they were going to be reciprocated. I was already hanging by a frayed piece of string when it came to my emotional well being. One more set back and I had no idea what kind of shape I would be left in.
“My mind has been playing tricks on me. I feel like I’m making more out of what is happening to me. It can’t possibly be as bad as I have made it out to be in my head.” I refused to let myself fall into pieces over my ex and my sister, that would be giving them too much power.
“Aurora, I don’t know if I am the best person to give this advice. But it seems to me the best solution to your problem is to sever any connection to your past.” I was already thinking the same thing, but I was afraid to say it out loud. I was afraid of the consequences.
“I wish there is something that I can hold onto from my past. I don’t know how to start over. For the first time in my life, I feel like I can’t see the present and the future.” I was using him in much the same way he had used me when I was listening to him.
“I wish I could say the same. The past I have been running from is no longer in my rearview mirror. I’ve gotten caught up in something.” I was going to ask some questions, but I didn’t feel he was looking for me to solve this problem. I was there to validate his emotions.
“Since you can’t tell me the specifics, there is only one thing that I can say. If you’re already thinking what you’re doing is wrong then maybe you already have your answer.”
The sun was rising slowly. The fog was slowly forming near the dips of the valley. It was a beautiful sight. Travis was still holding me from behind, wrapped his arms around me, keeping me warm and holding me steady. Alas my legs were twitching from the effort of standing up for an extended period of time. Travis brought me back downstairs and down the elevator in the wheelchair. It was already 6:35 in the morning. The long term care ward was slowly coming alive, staff were getting ready with breakfast. Travis helped me back into my bed, he kissed me on my cheek and left.
CHAPTER 8
Travis
“I don’t like this any more than the two of you. The job is postponed. Our inside guy informs me that a big fish is coming into town. If we wait a little while longer, we will find ourselves swimming in cash.” Owen was usually more anxious, but something was making him lick his lips with a salivating hunger for a bigger payday.
“The present owners of the vehicle that I borrowed from will be home the first of next month. Does this postponement make it necessary to bring the vehicle back? I went to a lot of trouble to get it.” I still owed Olivia a dinner.
“I would hold onto it for now. It might be cutting it close, but we should be able to utilize the vehicle.” Owen was standing with his hand on the trunk of the tree.
Harper was once again playing with the knife between her fingers on the hood of the jeep. We had met at the lookout point. It was still early and the teenagers looking to score wouldn’t be showing up for hours.
She didn’t nick herself and she was quite proficient at playing that game. I had a feeling she could do it blindfolded if requested. The black tee shirt did nothing to hide her obvious attributes.
The view of the city from this dizzying height was a stellar display of dazzling lights. It wasn’t quite the same as what I would find on top of the hospital roof.
“I hope so. I have already returned the security uniform.” I could’ve gotten a job with the company, but anything that went wrong would obviously be traced back to the new guy.
“One of these days you’re going to have to tell me who is helping you. Knowing your reputation with the ladies, I have to assume it’s someone of feminine persuasion. Is her name Olivia?” This little tidbit of information made Harper stop with the knife poised in her hands.
“I’m not sleeping with her, but it’s not from her lack of trying. She does these small favors to try to get into my pants. I know I can’t keep stringing her along without putting out.” She had heard rumors of my prowess and was ready to find out for herself. I had been playing it casual giving her hints of impropriety, but not taking it much further than second or third base.
“I admire how you keep her begging for it. The more she wants you the better chance she will come through with whatever request you might have.” His black windbreaker was flapping loudly with the wind blowing in a gale over the cliff.
“I don’t suppose you can give us a tentative date of when this is going to happen. I would like to know when to be ready. I don’t think it’s unreasonable considering what I’m going through with my mother.” She was getting weaker by the day, but she was smiling through the ordeal for me.
“A high roller will be coming in on Christmas Eve. He has procured the services of a boat for his daughter’s wedding. It’s basically a shotgun wedding, probably a bun in the oven. The bride’s family is loaded so I would expect a lot of cash gifts on the boat that night.” I wasn’t sure how I felt about doing this during the festivities of a traditional holiday. Robbing a wedding was a new low.
“Owen has done his due diligence, but he is still reluctant to share what he knows. I was impressed, but now it’s getting on my last nerve.” Harper was once again using the same shampoo, but there was an extra added bonus of her perfume.
“I have good reason to keep some of these things to myself. Call it whatever you want. I will give you more of the particulars when we get closer to the date. I don’t see anything changing with the original plan. There might be some deviation since it’s Christmas and all.” Owen always had been a bit paranoid when it came to information. Christmas Eve would be a mad dash for many to do their holiday shopping.
“I will pick up a few things to make us blend in with the crowd. The stores will be busy raking in the cash. People will be stressed and their concentration will be on what they have to get for little Johnny. The men will be frazzled trying to come up with something unique to sweep their women off their feet.” I couldn’t understand why people were still shopping the conventional way when it was convenient to do it online.
“I do like the way you think, Travis. I have already tentatively made arrangements for us to get out of the country that same night. There are three tickets waiting for us at the airport. I’m not trying to tell you what to do, but it’s better to be prepared.” Owen had made this unilateral decision without first consulting me.
“I’m going to have to risk staying behind until I am able to finish my business with my mother. They have been saying that she has very little time left for the past few months.” I could tell that Harper was still angry. I was going to have to do something to make it up to her.
“We both understand your commitment to your mother. There are still a few days before the job. Spend as much time with her until then. We won’t get in the way.” Owen and Harper had always been a family who stuck together through thick and thin.
“Have you thought of doing something else after this gig? I mean we can’t be doing this forever. At least I can’t, I am not going back to jail again. This gig has to be the last.” I was ready for a new start. Desperate, in fact, for a change. I wanted to be a better man. Not just for the chance with Aurora.
“I can’t speak for Harper, but I can’t say no to easy money. After this job, you’ll have a good chunk of change to work with. That should be enough to buy you some time to figure out your next move. You’re more than welcome to join us.” Owen had always felt like the dysfunctional black sheep little brother I had never had.
“You should seriously consider taking my brother up on his offer. I can’t speak for you, but our time together was explosive. There’s no reason why it can’t continue. Take a leap of faith and see where it goes.” I couldn’t deny the way my body could respond to her touch.
“I’ll think about it. Also I made sure to change my route on the way here to prevent anybody from following me. I’m sure the both of you took the necessary precautions.” They were anal about everything, constantly looking over their shoulders to see if the long arm of the law was onto them.
“Listen Travis, I’m going to give you some incentive to really give it some thought. I have several different bikinis I haven’t even tried on yet. Each one is more scandalous than the last. I could even be convinced to wake you up in the morning a different way every time. I will let you use your imagination.” As much as Harper was tempting me, all I could think about was Aurora. I was tired of Harper always trying to get in my pants, either she was using me to satisfy her nymphomaniac ways or she was clinging to her past through me. I needed to steer the topic of discussion back to the job again.
Kiss Me : A Modern Sleeping Beauty Retold (A Modern Fairy Tale Series Book 2) Page 5