by Kyle, Celia
We both fall silent because at times like this, there are no easy answers, and neither Solair nor I stand much on platitudes.
Chapter Thirteen
Lamira
“She’s killing it.”
“And that’s why she’s the best.” Sitting with her back against the wall of my bunk, Varia crosses her legs and nods sagely at the holovid playing at the center of the room.
On it, a large stage surrounded by thousands of screaming fans is being illuminated by a multitude of red and blue lights, a single woman with an exotic attire made of giant golden feathers at the center of it all. The thrumming of a steady beat has the crowd swaying like a single entity, and that’s even before Fenix Black has begun singing.
A rising music star straight out of Novaria, she’s been tearing up the charts for the last couple of months and it seems like every woman our age is a fan. I count myself as one of them. Something I was planning to do before I woke up in the Frontier’s damp cargo hold was save up enough money to attend one of her concerts. I guess that plan is dead now. Unless Fenix Black decides to hold a concert for the IHC’s most wanted list, I’m never going to see her live.
“You think we’ll ever go back to being like them?” I point at the women and men singing along with Fenix Black, her silky voice now filling the entire room. I think about lowering the volume, but decide against it and simply raise my voice. “Are we ever going to have a normal life again?”
“Well, didn’t you get the memo, Lamira?” she asks me in a sarcastic tone. “We’re rogues and adventurers now. Why would we want a normal life?”
“Very funny,” I can’t stop myself from laughing. It’s good to know that Varia is maintaining an upbeat attitude about the whole thing. She’s right about that. There’s no use in turning into a depressed blob, after all.
“Why wasn’t I invited to this party?” I hear someone shout, and Varia and I turn toward the door just as Fiona bursts into the room. She’s wearing blue mechanic overalls that are one size too large for her petite frame, and she has rolled the oiled-stained sleeves up to her elbows. Crossing her arms, she tilts her chin up toward the holovid. “Fenix Black, huh? Her last album was dope.”
“Are you a fan?”
“I wasn’t, but...” she starts to say, and then merely shrugs. “Everyone in my bunk room insists on playing her concerts all the freaking time, so it’s not like I have a choice. I think I already know all her lyrics by heart.”
“Well, you can join us then. We’ve just started to—”
“Yeah, no.” Waving one hand at the holovid, she lowers its volume and then grabs a datapad from her pocket. Looking at us with a confident expression, she closes the door behind her and closes the distance between us three. “I came here to talk about Solace.”
She doesn’t need to say a word more.
Varia and I immediately sit up on the bunk bed, and I shut the holovid off with a quick gesture. Fenix Black’s voice disappears completely, leaving in its wake an anxious silence. Turning up her datapad, Fiona connects the screen to the room’s terminal, and a holographic map takes over the place where Fenix Black’s holo concert was. On it, a planet of an icy blue appears, eight moons floating in its orbit.
“That planet is Tartus,” Fiona starts to explain. “As we suspected, it’s a fringe planet outside of League space. It doesn’t really appear on most official registries since there’s only one small chartered settlement on the surface, but what Lamira told me about an abandoned base helped narrow my search.” Raising both her hands, she spreads them widely to enlarge one of the moons on the holographic projection. This one has the same blue tonality as the planet, but its diminutive size sheds some doubts on it being an actual moon. It’s more like an asteroid that was pulled into Tartus’ orbit and remained trapped there.
“None of these moons are called Solace, though,” Varia says, eyeing the map attentively. With both her hands on her hips, she lets a small frown take over her face. “That one, for instance, is called Consolation.”
“Exactly,” Fiona smiles. “And do you know what’s a synonym for consolation? There’s no prize if you guess right, but—”
“Solace,” I whisper, my heart picking up the pace as I stare at the small moon floating in front of us. “So, is this the place we’re looking for? Is this what the woman on the medbay was talking about? It has to be.”
“I can’t know for sure,” Fiona sighs. She presses a button on her datapad’s screen and the holographic map fades immediately. We’re just left staring at each other, anticipation and anxiety making the atmosphere electric. After being in the dark for so damn long, we’re on the verge of shedding some light into what the hell happened to us. If there’s a connection between Solace and the Frontier, we have to know what it is. “I know it’s a stretch to say this Consolation is the place we’re after, but I’m betting it is. It just seems like too much of a coincidence, especially after what Lamira heard back at the market.”
“It makes sense, yeah,” I agree, my voice acquiring an almost conspiratorial tone. “Solace must be some kind of codename. After all, if they—whoever they are—used the name Consolation, it’d be much easier to track them.”
“But I tracked them anyway.” Smiling widely, Fiona lets her triumphant self show. She kept us alive with her tech skills aboard the Frontier, and now she’s pushing toward an answer; if anyone has earned the right to be confident, it’s her. “Tartus isn’t that far away from our current coordinates. We could check it out, but…”
“But?”
“From the information I’ve managed to gather, the place is super sketchy,” Fiona admits. “There’s only one chartered settlement in there, but it seems like a few others have managed to fly under the radar so far. That’s because the place is teeming with smugglers, thieves, and Mother knows what else. Tartus is one unsavory place, to say the least.”
“The Kilgari are smugglers,” I remind everyone. “They wouldn’t stand out. Besides, we’re not interested in Tartus, only in one of its moons.”
“That’s a good point,” Varia agrees but doesn’t sound too confident about our whole conversation. Sitting on the edge of my bed, she runs one hand through her hair and sighs. “Thing is, I’m not entirely sure if Solair would agree to such an expedition. We don’t know what we might find there, and we’re already taking a lot of risks as it is. Besides, I know the Ancestral Queen’s finances aren’t exactly stellar. I don’t know if investigating Tartus will be a priority for the Kilgari, at least right now. At the very least, it’ll take some convincing, and I don’t—”
Before she’s done talking, I head toward the door. Both Fiona and Varia follow me with my gaze, and I stop by the doorway and look back at them over one shoulder. Smiling, I give them what I hope to be a reassuring nod.
“I think I know someone who might be able to help us,” I tell them.
With that, I’m gone.
Chapter Fourteen
Grantian
It’s my responsibility as first mate to watch the bridge during the night shift, and it’s been a long twelve hours. I’m looking forward to returning to my quarters and my comfortable bed, assured I’ll probably be asleep within minutes of my head hitting the pillow. Although all was quiet, sometimes those shifts are the worst because I’m awarded with too much time to think.
And of course, like it’s been nearly every spare moment over the past few days, my mind’s been filled with Lamira. Her beautiful face has started invading my thoughts quite often as of late—in a good way, of course—but never more often than when my mind is unoccupied.
Not that I mind at all. I could certainly dwell on worse things.
During my shift, I couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened in the market on Kyvos. I couldn’t believe the guards who’d assisted her hadn’t seemed to think it strange that a human female was working on a planet so far away from IHC space. They’d only helped her pick up the dropped melons and sent her on her merry way, not
even bothering to throw her another glance after she’d departed.
Either they were very stupid, or we were very, very lucky.
I haven’t seen Lamira since we left the market and I’m suffering for it. Much to my chagrin I’m quickly turning into a lovesick fool, constantly hoping I’ll run into her somewhere on the ship. I could just go visit her—it’s not like I don’t know where her room is—but she has a roommate and I never know when she’ll be there alone. The last thing I want to do is make a fool out of myself in front of yet another woman. Doing so in front of one—even if she is my jalshagar—is bad enough.
I’m nearly at my room, located not far from the bridge, when I think my eyes are deceiving me. Unless I’m going crazy, Lamira is snaking her way through the narrow corridor before me. Her typical beaming grin is plastered on her face and aimed in my direction, disarming me completely. I’m dumbfounded for a moment, as I hadn’t expected to see her, but I recover quickly and return her smile.
“Just the Kilgari I was looking for.” Her voice is a sultry drawl.
I stop short and wait for her to reach me. Damn all the gods for how I turn into an anxiety-riddled mess whenever she’s near. I feel like I lose all form of coherent thought, which causes me to trip over my words. It’s a miracle she doesn’t think I’m a complete idiot.
“How can I be of assistance?”
She wastes no time tiptoeing around the truth of the reason why she’s sought me out. “Fiona thinks she’s pinpointed what and where Solace is.”
“Are you serious? That’s excellent news,” I tell her.
The women are adamant that they want to know what happened to them, even though part of me thinks it’s best for them not to.
“Yeah, I thought so. Do you have a moment to talk?”
All my previous exhaustion from the long night instantly vanishes. Seeing her and hearing the husky tone of her voice has given me a second wind. The pull of the unconfirmed bond between us is so strong, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be. Her scent is overwhelming—overpowering—and this close, the urge to protect and care for her is so strong I can barely keep ahold of myself.
“I always have a moment for you.” I want so badly to touch her, to kiss her and hold her against me, but I need more time to figure this out. I need a sign from her that she wants me too. I won’t be one of those males who takes what he wants and damn the consequences. I’ve always been too level-headed for that. Maybe to my own detriment.
Lamira leans against the wall and crosses her arms over her chest, but her stance isn’t defensive. In fact, she looks more relaxed and comfortable than I’ve ever seen her. Her hair is tied into two long braids that frame her face, and her eyes are warm and open as she peers up at me. A small smile plays at her lips and I find I can barely drag my gaze away from them, tantalizing as they are.
“Okay, so here’s what Fi thinks. She checked the area surrounding Tartus, and found a whole bunch of moons. One is called Consolation—which is a synonym for Solace—so she’s convinced it’s a codename, either for the entire moon or a facility there or something.”
Her voice has increased in speed and volume, belying her excitement. Even though she hasn’t moved otherwise, I can tell the information has caused hope to set up camp inside her heart.
“That’s certainly interesting—and a good assumption. Who else knows about Fiona’s theory?”
“Me and Varia at this point. Varia’s planning to speak with Solair about it. We want to go to Consolation. If there’s even a chance of there being information there about why we were taken, we need to find it. We can’t—I can’t—keep living in the dark like this.”
Her brow creases with frustration, but she’s no less beautiful because of it. I hate to cause her any disappointment, but I won’t lie to her.
“Even though Tartus is relatively close by, we’re privateers. We need to complete jobs to make money, especially now that the Queen’s occupancy has nearly doubled. There aren’t many jobs to be found this far out of League space, and I don’t see Solair agreeing to take us even further, even if his mate is asking.”
I lean in closer to her to soften the blow, drawn in by both her scent and the crestfallen look on her face.
“You don’t think he could be convinced? Even if say, you were to speak with him?” she asks, gazing up at me with wide eyes.
“I would, but I already know what his answer will be. And he’s right. It’s important that we keep to a schedule, especially since we’ve been so thrown off with everything that’s happened. If we don’t work, we don’t get paid. If we don’t get paid, we don’t eat.”
“But you can’t put a price on the information we could garner by going there,” she says.
“Be that as it may…”
The defeat on her face breaks my heart. I don’t want to be the one to make her feel this way, but I also don’t want to set her up to be upset when Solair inevitably says no. He’s a good male and I know he sympathizes with Varia and the other women, but first and foremost his duty is to his crew.
At that thought, I have an idea.
“I’ll talk to him for you. Let Varia speak with him first to set the idea into his head. I’m sure he won’t deny her flat out. He’ll want time to consider it first. He usually asks my opinion on such matters. When he does, I’ll tell him I think we should go—because I do. I want you to get the answers you seek, Lamira. I want you to have everything you desire.”
This time, I don’t stop myself from reaching up to twist my fingers along the length of one of her braids. Maybe she doesn’t understand my intentions. Maybe I need to kick it up a notch.
Her eyes flick over to my hand, quickly, and then back to my eyes. “You’d do that for me? Side with Varia and talk to Solair?”
“Of course, I would. I feel like we’re starting to be quite a good team, you and me.”
With a laugh, she playfully swats my hand away from her hair, but takes it in hers before it falls to my side once more.
“Thank you,” she says, playing with my fingers before looking up at me again.
That gaze is steadily becoming my downfall. There’s nothing I won’t do for her now, no cities I wouldn’t burn, no lives I wouldn’t end. I’d sell my soul to any and all the gods if it meant her happiness.
But “you’re welcome” is all I can find the nerve to say.
Chapter Fifteen
Lamira
Against all odds, I feel better now.
Despite smiling confidently at Fiona and Varia right before I left the bunk room, I wasn’t exactly sure about how Grantian would react to my request. He is this ship’s first mate, after all, and he has a duty toward his captain and his crewmen. Now, though, I know he has my back. He sees the women aboard the Ancestral Queen as part of his crew, and that’s a comforting thought.
Heartened by the conversation I had with him, I stroll down the corridor and make my way toward the mess. It’s around lunch time now and, last I heard, Marion was helping Jax in the kitchen. That, coupled with the new supplies we just bought, might translate into an edible meal for a change. As much as I admire Jax’s excitement over his culinary experiments, I can’t say the results are that pleasant. Sure, his food has all the nutrients anyone would need, but the taste? Ugh.
“You’ve got to be kidding,” I mutter as the doors slide back to reveal the mess. The room is only half full, but that’s not what grabs my attention. The one thing I home in on is the smell of chocolate wafting in the air, the scent of it sweet enough to make my stomach roil. When was the last time I ate any chocolate? It feels like a lifetime ago.
“If I were you, I’d hurry,” I hear an amused voice say right beside me, and I turn on my heels to see Marion standing there. She’s wearing her regular clothes, but there’s a white apron over them. I have no idea where she found one, but it does help her look like a respectable chef. “These guys are a fan of my chocolate cake, and if you take too long there won’t be any left.”
“I can see that,” I laugh, watching as a group of Kilgari mechanics stuff themselves with large slices of cake. You’d never think guys like them would have a sweet tooth, but that seems to be the case. “Where the hell did you manage to find chocolate?”
“I told you it was a good idea to have me with you guys on the market.” Taking me by the arm, she drags me across the length of the mess half and toward one of the tables at the back. We sink into our seats and Marion produces a small plastic container from inside the front pocket on her apron. Laying it on the table between us, she pops the lid open to reveal a massive slice of cake. The sight of all the chocolate icing immediately makes my mouth water. “I managed to find a merchant who was carrying some, and I figured I could buy just a little. The damn thing is expensive, but I figured everyone needed a treat.”
“Damn right we need a treat,” I tell her, already breaking a piece of the slice with my fingers. Pushing it into my mouth, I close my eyes and let its sweet flavor inundate me. “You’re good, Marion. You’re really good.”
“It’s not like I have a choice,” she laughs. Resting her chin on the palm of her hand, she smiles warmly. “It’s either that or let Jax be in charge of things, and we all know how gifted he is. I mean, most of the Kilgari know better than to complain, but…” She trails off, suddenly noticing I’m not listening to her, and snaps her fingers right in front of my face. “What are you looking at?”
“Huh? Oh—nothing,” I lie, quickly diverting my gaze from the entrance. Grantian has just walked in and, somehow, my subconscious picked up on his presence. Before I even knew what I was doing, I was sneaking a glance at him. Even now, as I try to focus on Marion and her scowl, I still feel that magnetic pull tugging at my insides. It’s as if Grantian has put me under some kind of Kilgari spell, one that I can’t shake off no matter how hard I try.