I backed away slowly through the trees, my mind racing with her words as I made my way back to the castle.
Forrest and Craig had expected me to make it official right away, but I wanted to wait until there wasn’t a war going on. Saving our people was more important than having a ceremony to show everyone what we already knew. Sabella and I were meant to be together. She was my queen, I knew that, but she was starting to second-guess everything we had together. How was I supposed to prove my feelings to her when she fought me at every turn?
As I shifted back, walking through the courtyard, I vowed to set aside a night, soon, when we could sit down and decide our future together. But as I started to plan out what that night might entail, one of my commanders was coming up to me with questions about tomorrow’s plan. I followed him and lost myself in the preparations for what could very well be another battle I knew we were far from prepared for.
4
Sabella
I avoided Tristan most of the day, hanging out with Kate, or helping Lucy make salves and gather supplies for the infirmary, in case the trip into the pocket dimension ended with all of them coming back wounded.
I refused to acknowledge the notion that some of them might not come back at all. All day long, I waited for a vision to come, anything to give me a hint that this plan of theirs would end better than my gut was telling me it would, but nothing. I even snuck into Tristan’s room and ran my hand over every surface.
Still, nothing. No visions, nothing to be of any help.
I cursed my gift that was no longer a gift. In addition to the anticipation of a vision, I worried about Baladon using me to get to the others. If he spoke through me once, he could do it again, right? What if he was able to control me? I could attack the others and then what?
“Sabella?”
I jumped, turning quickly.
Greyson bowed his head in apology.
I smiled. At least, I tried to. “Sorry, lost in my own head.”
“I can tell.”
I’d been standing in the courtyard, watching, as more torches were lit to replace the ones dying out from burning nonstop in this confounded bleak darkness. Supplies and horses were being prepped as well as weapons.
“I just want to see one little glimpse of what’s going to happen tomorrow, just one.”
“Sadly, I don’t think that’s how your visions are intended to work.”
“Yeah, well, it’d be nice,” I muttered.
“Yes, yes it would. I wondered if I might speak with you a moment?”
“Sure, not like I’m doing anything else right now.”
He seemed to be wrestling with whatever was on his mind, then he nodded to himself. “In Silver Valley, there is an elf we sorcerers have often turned to for aid in matters concerning the gods.”
“And?” I asked, not sure where he was going with this.
“If there is anyone in all the realms who knows about the gods, how they work, how they think… maybe even about those born half god, there is a chance he may have the answers,” he told me. “His name is Hansi, and he is wise, even beyond my many years on this earth. I believe if we were to seek him out, he might not only have insight into Baladon’s plans, but about you as well.”
“You mean like with the visions?” I asked, trying not to get my hopes up. Too late for that. “Why didn’t you say anything sooner?”
“Hansi has been away traveling for many months, but I have received a missive from King Drake that he has returned to Silver Valley. And, I will be quite frank, he is not the most down-to-earth elf. He can be a bit out there,” he admitted.
“But if he can help, it’s worth seeing him, right?”
“Yes, I believe so. I know of late it’s been hard for you. Afterward I mean. There is a chance he knows of a way to assist you with the light as well,” he suggested. “The darkness has been sapping it from you.”
“And Baladon, if he has any knowledge of him, it would help Tristan.” My excitement plummeted. “But Tristan and the others are heading out tomorrow. He should see this Hansi first, right? In case he knows anything that could help?’
“That was my thinking. He won’t listen to an old man, but he may listen to you.”
I laughed at that. Tristan hardly seemed to listen to me anymore, but I had to try. “I’ll go and talk to him. if nothing else, he’ll at least let me go with you to Silver Valley while he goes bounding off into danger.”
“I would be happy to accompany you. I’ll send word to Hansi now, to let him know there’s a chance he’ll be having visitors. Excuse me.” He bowed his head before he left me to my thoughts.
I walked around the courtyard for a few more minutes, debating on how to approach Tristan with this request. As long as I phrased it the right way, he had no reason to think I would be in any danger. I’d have Greyson with me, if no one else. A sorcerer should count for something, right? And I could take my personal guard if he didn’t need them for tomorrow’s trip. Yeah, that’d work. I’d have plenty of protection, and then I could go track down what might turn out to be helpful leads while he tried not to get himself killed. As I made my way back inside the castle, I ran my fingers along the walls and doors, anything he might’ve touched, praying I’d get a vision before I saw him, but whatever power gave me my sight was quiet.
“Where’s Tristan?” I asked Boris when I saw him hurrying down the main hall.
“Last I saw, he was in the armory,” Boris said, eyes narrowing. “Why?”
“Have to run something by him is all,” I said with a bright smile that made Boris frown more. “What?”
“Sabella, if you are planning on asking to tag along, I can tell you already the answer will be no.”
“And if I said I had a vision?”
“Did you?” he asked.
I fidgeted.
“Didn’t think so.”
“Well, I still have to talk to him, so if you’ll excuse me.” I hurried past him, moving quickly for the armory. When I entered, I grimaced to find he was not alone, and started to turn around to leave when he called my name. “I was wondering if you had a minute,” I said, not moving from the doorway.
“Always.”
“Alone,” I added pointedly, and his eyes darkened with worry.
“Give us the room,” he told the other shifters, and they cleared out quickly.
I shut the door behind them, and when I turned back, Tristan stayed right where he was.
“Sabella, I don’t have much time. There are still a few details to be seen to.”
I tucked my hair behind my ears, suddenly nervous. “Yeah, I know, I just… I was talking with Greyson and I, well, uh, I think he’s onto something. I wanted to go check it out with him since I have a feeling you won’t put off this idea of yours to go back to that maze.”
“Can we discuss what happened earlier first?”
“Why?” I snapped, then hung my head. “Look, you lied to me, and I got mad. It’s fine, right?”
“Is it?” he challenged. “I feel like we’re pulling away from each other,” he said quietly.
“You said it yourself, relationships are hard and this one, well, it’s different. It’s just going to take time.” I said it, wanting to reassure him, but the words sounded lame, even to me.
“Then why do I feel like we’re running out of time?”
“I don’t know, but this isn’t the time to talk about it. Never is,” I mumbled, and his eyes darkened. “It’s fine, alright? But if Greyson thinks he can get us answers on Baladon and maybe even help with my visions, I’d like to go with him.”
I could tell he wanted to keep talking about our latest fight, but he crossed his arms and asked instead, “Go where with him?”
I dug my toe into the stones as I said, “Silver Valley.”
“Absolutely not,” he growled.
“Oh, come on. Why not?”
“You know perfectly well why. I’m going to be leaving and after your stunt with the spiders, I’
m not about to let you out of my sight, or those that will keep you under close watch while I’m away,” he shot back, stalking across the room. “You are to stay here where I know you’ll be safe.”
“Why don’t I just come with you then? I might be able to help.”
“Do you even hear yourself? Do you understand how crazy that sounds?”
“Do you?” I poked him hard in the chest, ignoring his growling. “You were almost killed the last time we were there, remember? I was not. I should go with you.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m the alpha and I said so, end of story.”
He stormed around me, heading for the door, leaving me with my mouth open. “Get back here, furball.” I took off after him and caught his arm, dragging him to a stop. “You do not just get to order me around like that. I should be with you.”
“It’s too dangerous. What if it’s a trap?”
“What if it is? If I go with you, I might be able to see it before you walk right into it. Tristan, you know you should take me with you. You just won’t because you don’t actually trust me to take care of myself.”
His whole body stilled as if I’d struck him. “If I wasn’t constantly saving you, I might.”
“Wow, so there it is, everyone.” I threw my arms up as I backed away from him. “The truth comes out at last. You tell everyone around I’m your beta, your queen, and yet you don’t trust me. That’s just great.”
“Sabella,” he said quietly, glancing around at the crowd of shifters who’d stopped what they were doing to listen.
“Oh, I’m sorry, did you not want everyone to hear us again?”
“You are being ridiculous.”
I laughed harshly and backed up another few steps. “You’re right, absolutely right. This is all my fault because I’m not a shifter and I can’t fit into your pack.”
His jaw clenched, and the muscles strained in his neck. I waited for him to deny it, to say something, anything to the contrary, but when he kept his mouth shut and his shoulders sagged dinglike the fight had gone out of him, I felt a bit of my heart shatter.
“Ok. No, you know that’s fine,” I whispered, wiping hastily at my eyes before any tears could fall.
“Sabella,” he said.
Suddenly, I felt dizzy. I threw my hand out to the wall to catch myself as a vision slammed into me.
The last thing I saw before I slipped under was Tristan holding me in his arms, his eyes filled with worry.
And then he was gone.
I spun around, but all around me was darkness. I waited for something to happen, to see anything in the midst. Fog swirled around my feet, and the darkness grew dimmer until there was an eerie light falling over me and the nothingness around me.
“Well, this is new,” I whispered to myself. “Hello?”
I had no idea who I expected to respond, but then I heard a wolf howling mournfully in the distance. It was heartbreaking, and I felt drawn to it as the howl went on and on, stretching into eternity.
I walked and walked, the fog parting for me, and then there was a wolf silhouette ahead, standing on a ridge, but it wasn’t alone. Four others stood by him to his right, but they were all in shadow.
The howling died away, and its gaze focused on something at its feet.
“Tristan?”
Why was I having a vision of him? And those other people, who were they?
The light grew bright enough I could make out Craig’s face, and his hand was on Kate’s right shoulder. They stared sadly down at the ground, too. The next face that came into view was Forrest, but the last one remained hidden from my sight.
I took another step, then paused. I glanced down when my foot nudged something solid.
“No,” I gasped and staggered backward.
I stared at myself, on the ground, eyes wide open, staring back at me. Lifeless.
A sharp gasp sounded, and Kate tumbled to the ground next, followed by the third figure standing beside Forrest. I scrambled back further away as that mournful howl was joined by Craig’s pained yell and Forrest’s furious roar.
Death. That’s all this vision showed me. The deaths of those to come.
Look closer, my daughter.
“Mom?” I shook my head, not seeing her, unable to look away from the three dead bodies before me. “What is this?”
The future that must happen… you have to find them, Sabella… find them and remember what it will take…
“What, we’re going to die? All of us?”
But she said nothing else.
The figures vanished, and I was thrown back into a pit of utter darkness.
Cackling sounded around me, and I wanted to curl in on myself and disappear.
“You see how futile it is to fight against me?” Baladon. He was here, but I couldn’t see him.
“You’re not really here,” I whispered to myself.
“Oh, I’m not, am I?”
A chilling breath brushed against my neck, and I spun around, catching a brief glimpse of red eyes flashing in the darkness before they vanished.
“You will fail, Sabella. You and your friends, your shifter. You will all die. Is that truly the future you want for yourself? Death?”
“What else did you have in mind?”
“You are my niece, family. Join me, and we will rule this world together.”
“You’re currently murdering the rest of the family,” I pointed out, proud to hear my voice wasn’t shaking like the rest of me. “Why would I help you?”
“Why not? Do you wish to live?”
“Not in darkness.”
“Pity, you have such potential, such power within you. If only you would see the truth of who you really are,” he sighed. “You could be unstoppable.”
“I’m happy right where I am.”
“Are you?” he whispered right in my ear, and I jumped. “You don’t seem happy to me. Every moment brings your sanity closer to slipping away. That shifter you think cares for you, he will be the one who drives you over the edge. He’ll be the reason you lose all you are and fall back into the endless turmoil that exists inside your mind.”
“No,” I argued. “Tristan is keeping me sane.”
“Is he now? Or is it merely an illusion? You started growing saner once you were back in the realms. You honestly believe he has the power to hold back the madness inside you? Do you? A shifter who wants nothing but to use you for your visions, control you?”
I scrunched my eyes shut, shaking my head. “That’s not true.”
“No? Huh, could’ve fooled me.”
“Get out of my head,” I yelled.
“Fine, if you insist, but you and I both know what Tristan truly wants you for… and fears.”
“He fears nothing.”
Baladon laughed again.
I cringed to feel him so close.
“That’s a lie, we both know he’s as scared of you as you are of losing control. How about a taste, for experimental purposes, of course?”
“What are you going to do? Baladon.”
He’d said he was going to test Tristan. He couldn’t mean with me, could he?
I screamed for him again, but then a horrible cry resounded in my ears, and I fell to my knees, but then I kept falling and falling, down into never-ending darkness, waiting for the end.
I opened my eyes and screamed.
Some stranger was holding me in his lap.
I screamed again, pushing away from him and he let me go, but I was surrounded by a hall made of stone. Where the hell was I? I shook from head to foot as I strained to remember something, anything. Who… who was I?
“Sabella,” the man who’d been holding me said loudly.
“Who… who is that?” I asked. “I’m not her.”
“Yes, you are,” he said patiently.
Why was he being so nice? He was the reason I was here, right? And I didn’t know where here was. What was I wearing?
“Take
your time, you’ll remember.”
I frowned, backing away from him until I found myself against a wall with nowhere to go. “No… I don’t know you, get away from me,” I yelled when he reached for me.
“What’s going on?”
I glanced at the woman and her worried face. Why was everyone so worried about me? What happened? I waited for names, events, anything… but my mind was a complete blank. I had to get away from them all, get out of here.
“Sabella, you need to listen to me,” the man tried to say, but I didn’t want to listen.
“Get away from me,” I hissed. “Get away.”
I needed to run and then I saw a gap in the crowd. I took off at a dead sprint, slipping around people, as the man yelled that name again. I kept on running, not about to stop and go back to him. I rounded a corner and blindly continued on, searching for an exit, a way out of this maze.
On and on I ran until I finally saw a large set of doors propped open and beyond them, a night sky with no stars. Where were the stars? What horrible world was this that there were no stars?
“Sabella?” another man said and stood in the doorway, blocking my way.
“Craig, grab her.”
The man reached for my arms and pulled me against his chest, holding me firmly. I screamed and thrashed, trying to break free. “Let me go. Get off me.”
“What happened?” the man demanded as the other rushed up to him.
“She doesn’t remember.”
They kept talking, but a rushing filled my ears, and the rest of their words were lost on me. Heat spread out form my middle and I sensed something inside me clawing to get out, to save me from these strangers. The man holding me let go with a yelp of pain and they staggered backward as a bright light emanated from me.
“Sabella, look at me,” the first man said, and I focused on him.
“Leave me alone, please,” I begged, backing toward the doors.
“I can’t let you leave, alright? Just calm down, and we can talk about this.” He held out his hand for mine, each step I took, he matched it. “I just need you to pull back the light.”
Visions (Dragon Reign Book 7) Page 4