by Kirk Scroggs
culprit. In fact...
everyone they talk to
is a suspect!
Remember that!
The fate of humanity
could depend on it!
This calls for my Interrogation Stache SX!
It intimidates suspects with its manliness,
plus it has a Weirdo-meter to warn us
when someone is dangerously kooky.
Doesn’t your own
weirdness set it off
constantly?
Once they’re inside, a hole in the floor opens,
and a doctor bearing a big bowl of candy rises
up. He offers the confections to Logan and
Gustavo.
Don’t
mind if I
do, Doc!
I suppose you’re here about the curious
criminal-mole incidents. It’s certainly the
most exciting development in burrowing
mammals since the synchronized
swimming shrews of Sri Lanka!
Logan decides to put the pressure on Dr.
Yonder....
Hmmm. You sound awfully excited
about moles. Maybe too excited.
Yes indeedy-diggly! My
love for underground
mammals can only
properly be expressed
with a song! There
was a scientist
who had a mole and
Scapanus orarius
was his name-o!
Maybe we should cut the singing
and just stick to the facts.
Yeah. Don’t take it
personally, Doc. Your singing
might stink, but these gummi
worms are delicious!
Oh, those aren’t gummi worms.
A batch of radioactive earthworms
escaped their cage this morning.
Dr. Yonder gives the kids the grand tour of the
underworld where he studies all things that
live underground.
My own little world of under!
Wow!
It’s completely
underwhelming!
Dr. Yonder’s lab is chock-full of beakers and
gizmos and mole specimens. Across the room,
Logan spots a strange device that resembles a
bullhorn crossed with a fire extinguisher.
Watch out
for escaped
earthworms!
What is
that thing?
This is the Mole Disser 5000.
It uses high-frequency insults
to drive off moles.
You see, moles are very
sensitive to sound and
hurtful comments.
Girlfriend, that fur
you’re wearing is so
ten years ago!
That was harsh!
My Weirdo-meter is
starting to vibrate.
Don’t rush to
judgment just yet.
Let’s scope out his
office next.
Dr. Yonder escorts them to his swanky office.
Logan stops beating around the bush and asks
him where he was yesterday at 4:25 PM, the time
the merry-go-round went bye-bye.
Oh, I was at the movies with Mumsy.
We saw Amazon Werewolves on Wheels.
The ticket stub should be around here somewhere.
Look
closely.
Can your mumsy
verify this?
Why don’t you ask her
yourself? Mumsy loves
talking to children.
Is it just me or is his “mumsy” a stuffed dead mole
with a pink purse? My Weirdo-meter is overheating.
Grrrrrr!!!
I think we have everything we need.
Now if you’ll just kindly show us the exit
so we can…RUUUUN!!!
Logan and Gustavo take off through Dr. Yonder’s
hall of prehistoric mole bones, with Wheelie
burning rubber in the rear.
They reach the exit
only to discover Dr. Yonder
brandishing a long metal
torture device!
Actually, this is just a
key to open the door.
Toodles! Come by again!
Next time I’ll have Mumsy prepare
grubs with brown gravy!
Back at Logan’s ice-cream truck headquarters,
our two detectives discuss the case over a couple
of cold Fudgysickles.
Whew! What a day!
That guy was a total loony
bird. I say we turn him in
to Cap’n Mosely pronto!
Not so fast!
Just because someone
thinks a preserved, hairy
critter is his mom doesn’t
make him a criminal. We
need hard evidence!
I hate to interrupt your
all-you-can-eat Fudgysickle
buffet, but Izzy Hurling
is being interviewed on
the local news!
Thanks,
narrator dude!
Please, folks!
Without your generous
donations, Hurling Rivers
might go out of business!
Hmmm, that’s suspicious.
I think we have one more
location to visit today.
I hope it’s someplace
that sells Pepty Bizmo.
I’m not feeling so good.
I don’t think I
should get on any
roller coasters after
eating radioactive
earthworms and
Fudgysickles.
We’re not here for the
rides, rookie. We’re here to
grill Izzy Hurling one more
time about his missing
merry-go-round.
Chapter 8
IZZY GUILTY?
Hurling Rivers Amusement Park. It’s nearing
closing time, and the park is as quiet as a
mouse with a sock in its mouth. It’s the perfect
opportunity for Logan to get some answers.
They find Izzy in his office. He looks frantic
and nervous as he flips through stacks of bills
on his desk.
Look
closely!
Read
carefully!
Hello, Mr. Hurling.
Having financial
troubles, are we?
Huh? Oh yes. To be honest,
even before my carousel was
stolen, business was slower
than a one-legged stinkbug.
Isn’t it true that you faked the theft
of your own merry-go-round so you could
collect donations and ransom money?
That’s crazy talk!
I would never…
aaah…aaah…
aaaaahhh…
Urg! Sniffle!
The dog! It’s
that dog!
Izzy’s violent allergic reaction to Wheelie leaves
Logan and Gustavo with no choice but to leave
his office empty-handed. They had thought
this visit would bring answers, but instead,
they leave with more questions and covered
in old-man sneeze particles.
Wheelie takes
it particularly
hard. Just look
at that sad face.
How dare you bring a dog into
my office! I’m extremely allergic
to any kind of animal hair!
I’m afraid you must
leave at once.
Our discouraged detectives slowly make their
way out of the park and…Hey! Where are you
two headed off
to so fast?
Well, perhaps I should take this moment to
remind you that the next lunch-money drop-off is
tomorrow at 5:27 PM !!!
No pressure. No pressure at all.
Home, to work on the
case some more. I’m still
not sure whodunit!
And I’m going to
barf behind that
shrub over there.
Sorry, students. I’m afraid I have to
collect your lunch money, or else that
criminal rapscallion will send his moles
again. I’m sure you understand.
Look
closely!
Chapter 9
DETENTION MOUNTS
The next morning at school, Principal Shrub
is collecting lunch money from all the students,
and, like a masseuse wearing boxing gloves, it
rubs Logan the wrong way.
Seems like Principal
Shrub is awfully eager
to take our lunch money.
I think he might be
another suspect.
Hmmm…he is a
pro at sucking the
fun out of life. Maybe
he’s turned it into a
lucrative venture.
The sound of music suddenly catches their
attention. It’s the school bully, Ignas Scurge,
and he’s at his locker whistling a happy tune.
What’s up with you, Ignas?
Shouldn’t you be in detention
or gluing some poor kid’s
earlobes to a toilet seat?
Naaaah! I’ve changed my ways, bro.
If I keep up my bully lifestyle, I’ll be lower than
those moles. And you can’t sink lower than
moles, cuz they’re already underground.
Look
closely!
The sight of Ignas Scurge smiling and being
nice sends Gustavo into a tizzy. Clearly, the
case is breaking him.
It’s all too much to handle!
Missing merry-go-rounds, hang gliding moles,
Ignas being nice! The world’s gone nuts!
Don’t let the pressure
get to you, rookie. We just need
to look at all the evidence one
last time. The answer is there!
So, during lunch, instead of pouring gravy over
Salisbury steak like the other students, Logan
and Gustavo pore over the clues, notes, and
doodles from the case....
Finally, Logan plants her finger on one of her
doodles!
There! You know
what that is?
A mustard
stain?
No! That, sir,
is the answer to
our mystery!
An Important Message
from the Narrator
Hiya, punks! Since you wanna be detectives so
bad, I thought I’d give you a chance to figure
out whodunit before Logan and Gustavo spoil
it in the next chapter. If you’re stumped, go back
and look at each page with a magnifying glass
labeled “Suspect” or “Clue,” like the ones right
here.
Read
carefully!
Look
closely!
Which one of these suspects
is a low-down dirty crook?
IZZY HURLING? He sure
needed the money.
DR. DEEP YONDER? He’s a
weirdo who knows his moles.
IGNAS SCURGE? He loves
stealing lunch money.
PRINCIPAL SHRUB? He was
all about paying off the thief.
Turn the page
to find who dood it!
Chapter 1O
A REVEALING ADDRESS
Hurling Rivers Amusement Park, 5:25 PM.
Logan and Gustavo have three weeks’ worth of
lunch money waiting for the thief. But, to make
things more interesting, they’ve also invited the
entire student body of Murkee Elementary,
the city police force, the media, and a dog on
wheels.
Gustavo steps up to a podium in front of the
spectators and law enforcement officials. He’s
wearing his Studly Stache LX to impress the
crowd.
Ladies and gentlemen! One of you is a filthy,
rotten criminal! The rest of you, I’m sure, are
lovely people. We have called you here to reveal the
identity of the scoundrel who has been training
moles to steal the fun away from our city’s youth.
Our first suspect was Dr. Deep Yonder!
His love for moles was downright creepy,
and he had the knowledge to train them.
But in his office, we discovered a
movie ticket stub from Wednesday
at 4:00. The merry-go-round was
stolen at 4:25 PM.
So, you’re off the hook, Doc!
You couldn’t have been in two places
at the same time. You might be a weirdo,
but you’re no miracle worker!
Thank goodness!
Mumsy’s reputation is
preserved, just like her
wrinkled flesh.
Logan turns her attention to the owner of
Hurling Rivers....
Izzy Hurling could have staged the
theft of his merry-go-round to get the
ransom money. His amusement park
is in dire financial trouble.
Lucky for him,
though, he’s allergic
to animal fur. There’s no
way he could have worked
with moles without having
a disgusting allergic
reaction!
That’s absolutely correct!
There’s no way I could have…
Yowza! We’ve really
gotta put a sneeze guard
around that honker of
yours, mister!
Even the school principal isn’t above suspicion.
The crowd roars with laughter. Principal Shrub
doesn’t take it too well.
For a second, we thought Principal Shrub
might have done it. But then we remembered
that he just isn’t that bright.
Why,
I oughta…!
With Shrub ruled out as the criminal, it leaves
just one other suspect....
Ignas Scurge,
the school bully!
He did it!
I beg your
pardon!
Beg your
own pardon, you
filthy swine!
Uh, call me crazy, but I think you need proof
before you can just make accusations like that.
The proof is in his locker! You’ll find a
walkie-talkie, a balloon full of helium to
disguise his voice, and books on small mammals
and advanced biology. This blockhead is actually
a brilliant scientist who can control moles!
Suddenly, Ignas jumps up onto the podium like
a frog with ants in his button-fly jeans and
confesses to the whole kit and caboodle.
All right! I did it! Those moles helped me
collect a hundred times more lunch money
than my usual shtick! You guys even
thought I had gone all nice. Suckers!
I should have known a bully
never changes his ways. Just like
a tiger never changes his stripes
and a fourth-grade boy never
changes his underwear!
Amen to
that, sist
er!
Captain Mosely steps up to make the arrest.
Sorry, Ignas, you’re coming
downtown with me. We have
laws against training moles to
steal stuff from kids. At least,
I’m pretty sure we do.
Ha! I’m just getting
started, copper! Get
ready tooooooo…
With a mighty tremor, the earth suddenly opens
up like an overstuffed piñata. Hundreds of attack
moles leap out and wreak havoc on the public.
But that’s just a warm-up....
You want your
merry-go-round
back? You got it!
Ha-ha!
Right behind the normal-size moles is one
abnormal, gargantuan, gigante, behemoth-tastic
robo-mole, built from the missing merry-go-round