by Shaila Patel
My heart ached at not being able to tell her. “It is. Are you angry?”
She looked at a spot on my T-shirt. “Frustrated.”
I kissed her temple and wrapped my arms around her. Raised voices floated to us from inside. Speaking of fair, I’d left Mum to deal with my mess. “I need to talk to my da right quick, but I’ll be back in a few. You said your mum’s coming home ‘round seven, yeah?” She nodded. “Well, it’s almost half six, and I want to walk you home.” Some strands of hair had come out of her ponytail, framing her face. I pushed them behind her ear. “Will you wait for me?”
“Of course.”
Before I turned to leave, I remembered what was in my pocket and pulled out a red lollipop. Her smile unclenched the knot in my stomach, reminding me this was all about her, about us. Nothing else mattered.
I found my parents in the front room and charged up to Da. “Mum had nothing to do with this, so I’ll be thanking you to leave her out of it.”
“I’ve a right to know—”
“Jaysus! Couldn’t you let me explain before you made it seem like I’d lied to her?”
He stood. “How in perdition am I meant to know what you’ve been saying? I didn’t even know she existed, and I’m mortified that I’m your father and knowing nothing!” He stopped to take a deep breath. “Now I know why you had your knickers in a knot in Charlotte.” He paced, ruffling his hair.
“I had reasons—”
“You had a grand time pissing off Gagliardi, and it was all to protect her, leaving me in the dark. You’re risking his wrath for her?”
“You did what?” Mum asked. “Patrick, you seem to have forgotten that detail.”
Da kept his glare on me as he told Mum what he’d thought unimportant the first time he shared the story with her. She bombarded me with questions, most of which Da answered with unfair assumptions. I’d been pacing, my impatience growing the longer Lucky had to wait.
“Enough! I’m walking Lucky home. I’ll be back whenever I get back.” I stormed out of the front room with Da on my tail.
“Don’t you derail yourself from our ultimate goal. You’re not knowing yet if she’s The One.”
“And I don’t give a fecking damn if she isn’t,” I said.
That glued him to the spot. I rushed out onto the patio, hearing him yell something not worth giving my ears to. The fact that my time with Lucky was over for the day was more pressing. It’d be murder waiting until tomorrow to see her.
She’d opened up to me in a way I’d not thought possible. She needed me, and it gave me hope. The sort of hope that cured diseases and stopped wars.
I slowed and felt the tension ebb as I reached Lucky. A lullaby of crickets had soothed her to sleep. Her face was so peaceful. No doubt she was exhausted, and if she’d been losing sleep like I’d been, it was a wonder she’d had any energy left to her. My mobile must have fallen out of my pocket before Da had interrupted us, and she was clutching it to her chest. I slipped it out of her hand and snapped a photo. With the sun as low as it was, her skin took on the soft haziness of one of those vintage filters from an editing app. I couldn’t help but stroke her cheek. She gave a soft moan. Could she feel the tingling in her sleep? She leaned her face into my palm, opened her eyes, and smiled. I took a diving leap into her happiness.
Sitting up, she wrapped her arms around me, burying her face in my neck. “It’s time to go, isn’t it?”
Ripples of her sadness nipped at me, and I squeezed her closer. Her scent filled my nostrils, reminding me she was my home now. “Only until tomorrow morning, yeah?”
Her warm lips pressed against my neck, and her attraction to me washed over like a tidal wave. Her emotions were so pure. I’d forever be addicted.
She sighed and looked up. “I’m making a mess of my needing space thing.”
“You’ll not hear any complaining from me.”
“I bet. Anyway … is everything okay with your dad?”
I cleared my throat. “Come on, you’re looking knackered.”
Her forehead wrinkled, but she nodded. I scooped her up in my arms. “Liam! Wha—? You don’t have to carry me. I’m not that tired.”
“I know. This is for me.”
She laughed and snuggled closer. “Such a sap.”
This gorgeous creature in my arms was my soul mate. Even without proof, I’d do anything for her, including protect her with my life. The instinct to guard her was all-consuming. How could she not be The One? Just a week ago, I’d been pushing her buttons, cynical about the search, about being with someone for the rest of my life. Now, I couldn’t see any other future for myself. I stepped into Mrs. Robertson’s back garden and slowed my walking to stretch out our time.
Lucky chewed on her thumbnail, her eyes unfocused. “I’ve been thinking,” she said. Her determination came across like a fish trying to swim upstream. “I can’t deny I’m curious—about the secret—but I know myself. I don’t think I can wait for long, and until then I can’t act like everything’s normal between us. It would hurt too much if … if … ”
“Shh. I know.” I kissed her forehead. “So what is it you’re suggesting?”
She shrugged. “Well, touching you confuses me. It’s weird, I just … I don’t know.” Her voice was soft, as if she were ashamed by her admission. “Would you mind if we kind of … limit it?”
“Not if that’s what you need.”
“How about this?” she asked. “Twice a day. Once in the morning and then when we say goodbye at the end of the day, until you tell me the secret and I can accept this whole thing. If I can, I mean,” she added softly.
Her earnest gaze cut right through me. I wanted her ifs to be whens. “If that’s what you’re wanting.”
She sighed and relaxed in my arms.
We reached her back porch, and I placed her down at the foot of the stairs. She’d left the back light on, and a swarm of insects buzzed around it. A bright, green frog clung to the gutter, standing guard over his find.
“So,” she started. “Of all the places you’ve moved to, where’s your favorite?”
“Here.” I winked at her.
Her laugh lit up her face. “Such a suck-up. Seriously. Where?”
“Nothing’s as fine as Ireland.”
“Will you go back? After graduation, I mean.” Apprehension tinged her emotions, like diving into dark, murky waters. She was pushing away her anxiety, but I felt the ripples before they receded.
Life on the estate was waiting for me. Did I want to go back? Sure. But without Lucky? I couldn’t imagine it. Not now. I sat on her steps and pulled her into my lap, where she curled up against me. “I’m eighteen. I’ll be staying and waiting for you to graduate.” She bolted upright. Her eyes widened. I traced her bottom lip. “I’ll go to university wherever you’ll be going.” As much as I wanted to bring her back with me, Ireland and the estate would have to wait.
“But your brother and cousins? Patty?”
I smiled. She would be thinking of them. “I’ll not be going anywhere without you, yeah? We’ll head to Ireland when you’re ready.” So much for not bringing up forever.
She narrowed her eyes and studied my face. “I–I believe you.”
I kissed her. Her faith in me made me feel like I could swim across the ocean.
She nestled her head against my shoulder and sighed. “Ireland, huh? They’d have dance programs there, too. And medical schools,” she whispered.
A car with an obvious fan belt problem squealed by, reminding me her mum would be home soon. “You should be getting yourself inside. Have a good night, will you now?”
“Doubt it. Haven’t been sleeping well lately.”
I unbuckled my watch and attached it to her wrist. “Try this.”
“What’s this for?”
“You dozed off holding my mobile. Maybe this’ll help when you’re not with me, yeah?”
The watch fit like a large bracelet
on her arm. She pressed it against her heart and then took out the band around her ponytail, letting her hair cascade around her shoulders. I couldn’t resist combing my fingers through her hair while she untwisted her ponytail holder. She stretched the simple black band over my wrist. “There. Something of mine.”
“Perfect.” I locked my arms around her, wishing I could have more of her. The pang of wanting to start our life together clawed at my insides. “It’ll be like getting stung by jellyfish, missing you tonight.”
Waves of her anxiety crested around me, and I felt like I was being pushed overboard in rough seas. She tightened her grip around me, not making any effort to leave. So I carried her up the stairs, took the house key from her pocket, and unlocked her door. Her breaths were quick against my neck. Without a word more, she tore out of my arms and rushed inside.
I let out a loud breath and dragged myself home. This wasn’t like when Cousin Robert and I had hid from Da for two days. We’d been ten and had taken a photo of him in the shower to enter into a Men of Ireland calendar contest. We were never sure what upset him the most—the photo or the fact he didn’t make the cut. I’d not be hiding from him this time around.
I braced myself to face the fire and walked inside. “I’m back.”
“In here,” Mum called from the dining room. They sat in front of dozens of open books scattered over the table.
“Is everything smoothed over, darling?” Mum’s eyes were red, and she held one of Da’s handkerchiefs bunched in her hand.
Shite. I ran a hand through my hair. “Good enough for now.
She turned back to face Da, blocking me from her feelings. These books, notebooks, and research were our life, right here, on this table. Bits of information and guesswork that had been bringing Lucky and me together, but also seeming to tear Da and me apart.
“If you’ve got a problem with me, let’s have it out then,” I said to him.
He thumbed through a notebook, tossed it aside, and reached for another one. He pulled a large binder from a stack beside him.
I banged my hand on the table. “Go ahead. Let’s have this out.”
“I’m done with your hard neck cheek, boyo.” A vein throbbed on his forehead.
“Liam, darling, do you know yet? About Laxshmi?” Mum asked.
I sat, running a hand over my neck. I could still feel Lucky’s lips on my throat. “Yeah, she’s The One. I’m sure of it.” She had to be.
Mum gasped. “How—?”
“I realized on Saturday. That’s all you’ll be needing to know.”
“Lay off the likes of that blather!” Da slammed the binder shut. “She’s still only a target until there’s proof of more, and your bloody hormones don’t mean shite.” He was pointing the tips of his reading glasses at me. “Until we’re knowing for a certainty, we’ve got to continue preparing ourselves to find the next target.”
I bolted out of my seat. “Next target? You and your targets can go to feckin’ hell.”
Mum put a hand on my arm, her fingers cold. “Darling, you know he’s just being thorough and thinking of the family.”
“No, he’s bloody pissed I didn’t tell him.” I ground my teeth together. “Have as many more visions as you like, but I’m staying here with her. With Lucky. This is my life. So it’s my choice.”
He stood, pushing the binder aside. “We didn’t sacrifice everything just to be putting up with your gammy hormones.”
“Hormones?” I grabbed the back of the chair to keep from punching something. “This isn’t about me getting to shag her.”
“You shouldn’t have become so involved with some beour without talking about it to the both of us first,” he yelled.
My anger spewed out, deepening my voice. “A beour, is she? Well, she’s not just some good-looking girl. It’s in love with her, I am!”
Mum and Da froze. Shite. Was I really in love with Lucky, or was I trying to make a point?
How can I already be in love?
I turned toward the window and saw Mrs. Robertson’s trellis and the climbing vine—now free of the weeds that had been strangling it the other day. All I knew was I wanted to be with Lucky, hear her voice, feel her in my arms, and make her happy. Sure, I loved her laugh, her big heart … her sincerity. I loved her cheeky attitude, her expressive eyes, and the way she looked at me like I was everything to her. I loved the way we needed each other, and—damn—was I ever wanting her.
It had happened piece by piece, right under my nose, just like a bloody puzzle fitting together.
I really am in love with her. The air rushed out of my mouth, and I smiled.
The sound of Mum’s giggling broke through the silence. She got up from the table and hugged me. “Liam, I’m happy for you. Does she feel the same?”
“I’m not … I don’t know,” I whispered. “We’re taking it day by day just now.”
Day by day until Lucky had an official empath breakthrough. She’d taken a step closer to it today with her panic attack. I’d blocked my mind again—several times, in fact—but she’d never sensed a single one of them. Her transition would be in limbo until she could sense one.
The sound of scratching stubble drew our attention. Da was rubbing his face. “Liam, you don’t understand. We need proof … or it’s another vision that’ll be pushing us on.”
“Patrick!” Mum looked horrified.
“Leave it, Mum. He doesn’t care about a bleedin’ thing but his pride.”
A wild and desperate look settled into Da’s eyes. “What I care about is your life! Could be she’s The One, but if she’s not, you’ll be needing to pull up your garters and move on with us. Like they say in the States, shit happens.”
“I’m eighteen. You’re not choosing who I love, and with a bloody certainty you’re not telling me how to live my life.”
He barreled around the table, stabbing his finger in my chest. “I’ll be saying it again—there’s no choice in the matter,” he spat. “They’ll kill you if you don’t find The One.”
Mum gasped, and the blood drained from Da’s face.
“What is it you’re saying?” I whispered.
Da clutched his head, shaking it, and Mum pushed me aside. “Patrick, so help me, you had best be telling me what you’re about. You’ve been hiding something for long enough and now you say—” Her voice choked on a sob.
I put my arm around her shoulders and led her to a chair.
Da wobbled into the one beside her. All I could do was stare at him. “Mum’s right. What’s this about?”
“Another vision.” He closed his eyes. “It’d be a year ago now.” He opened his sorrow-filled eyes and lifted them to Mum. “How could I tell you? I’ve never had conflicting visions—he’ll find his soul mate, but he’ll be murdered when he doesn’t.” He shook his head and shrugged.
Mum wiped away her tears and took his hand. “We will get to the bottom of this.” Her voice sounded small.
Da explained the vision to us. From what clues he’d gathered, the Soul Seekers would be the ones responsible for my death.
“But Lucky is The One,” I said, putting my hand on Mum’s shoulder. “So no worries, yeah?”
“Liam, darling,” Mum said. “This isn’t just about falling in love. You can’t risk your life—”
“It’s my life. When will you both get that through your heads?”
Da stood. “Knowing what this would do to the family—to your Mum—you’re still insisting on being a stubborn arse? The entire clan now depends on you, son. Who’ll be protecting them if you’re killed? Your cousin William? His farts couldn’t move a feather.”
“You’re expecting me to give up Lucky because of some conflicting vision of yours? You can bet your bloody arse that won’t be happening.”
Da stepped closer to me. “I’ll not be letting you risk everything over some mot you’ve got yourself. Not while there’s blood in my veins.” That very blood was throbbing in
the vein on his forehead again. “Would she be wanting you to do such a thing? Leave your family and clan unprotected?”
A cold chill spread over my body. “Don’t you dare.” My muscles coiled tight, ready to be sprung. “You’ve no right to manipulate us.”
“I’m your father, and that would be giving me every right,” he spat out.
“Seems we’re at an impasse. No reason for me to stay then.” I left the dining room, heading upstairs to pack. If I stayed, I’d be resolving this with my fists.
“Liam,” Mum called after me.
I tore up the stairs three at a time. Fifteen minutes later, I was back down with a stuffed suitcase and my school bag. I’d stay at a hotel and come over in the mornings to meet Lucky.
Mum and Da were arguing as I flew down the stairs. They paused when they heard me, and Mum rushed up to me.
“Liam, you’re upset and leaving won’t solve anything.”
“There’s nothing to be fixing, Mum. I’m trying to live my life, and he thinks he has some claim. No more. Everyone’s always had a piece of me and my future, but that ends.”
I’d be thick not to at least pay some heed to Da’s vision. With Ciarán’s help, I could set up some precautions around me—around Lucky too. The Soul Seekers would be after one or both of us whether she passed Da’s test or not. My only concern was for Lucky’s safety. Without me, they’d leave her alone. With me, her life was in danger.
I kissed Mum’s tearstained cheek and left. It was still humid enough outside to be suffocating, even with night falling. Swaths of pink and orange were clawed into the underbelly of the western sky as the last hints of sun disappeared. My suitcase wheels scraped against the pavement as I made my way to the street where I’d parked.
I brought the bags to the back of my Range Rover and turned to see Mrs. Robertson getting out of her car, one orthopedic shoe after another. She waved and waddled up to her house while I tossed my bags into the boot. Before I drove off, I left a message for Ciarán about what had happened and read one of his stupid texts he’d sent about an hour ago. I looked at our house and then at Lucky’s. Da’s words ground on my already frayed nerves.
“Could be she’s The One, but if she’s not, you’ll be needing to pull up your garters and move on with us.”