“Great,” I say, not willing to give this snake any information about him. Just that he is surviving just fine without your daughter.
Then I look at my mother. “I’m not ready for that, Mother. I want to start my business first.” I can’t believe I just said that. I had no intention of telling my mother my plans let alone her judgmental friend too.
She places her glass down on the silver tablecloth. “Business? And just what business is this?” Her tone holds judgment, and I hate how her eyes bore into mine.
My heart pounds in my chest, and my eyes shoot back and forth between the two of them as they wait for my response. My hands get clammy, and my throat goes dry. But Jaycent’s words help me relax. I believe you can change the world. “I want to open my own clothing store,” I say and then clear my throat. I lift my chin, trying to find the confidence I should have.
My mother actually smiles. “O’Kane clothing.” She nods. “I can see that.” Her eyes start to gloss over as she looks off into the distance, and I can already see her mind turning. “Furs and expensive leathers,” she muses out loud.
“I won’t be calling it O’Kane clothing,” I inform her.
Her eyes snap to mine, and they no longer have that look of pure ecstasy to them. “Then what are you going to call it?” she demands.
“You have to capitalize on your name,” Debra says as if I care what she thinks. “The rich and famous will be drawn to it by the name alone.”
I shake my head. “It’s not going to be that high-end. I mean the clothes will be, yes, but I want it to be reasonable where anyone can purchase from my store.”
My mother’s mouth falls open in shock. “I don’t like the idea of just anyone wearing our clothing line.”
Our clothing line? Nowhere in this business will she be involved. I smile as I fill her in on the rest. “I’m going to donate an article of clothing to the homeless shelters here in New York for every item sold.”
“Oh, no.” She shakes her head, her dark hair hitting her cheeks. “That is unacceptable.” She lifts her glass to her lips. “Now you want homeless people wearing our name?” She sips her drink then places it back down. “That won’t happen.”
Her and Debra start to discuss my future business when she gets an idea. “We could also do hats. Can you imagine the fortune we’ll make at the Kentucky Derby?” she asks excitedly, and they both laugh.
I slam my hand down on the table, and my mother gasps. “This is my business, not yours,” I say.
Her blue eyes narrow on me. “Is this your friend Ashlyn talking?” Before I can say a word, she turns to Debra. “This Ashlyn girl is blue-collar. I’m sure she is just trying to get expensive things at a cheap price.”
I stand from the table, having enough. “Stop talking about my friend that way,” I shout.
She places her hand on her chest and has the audacity to look offended. “Rebecca ...”
“I go by Becca, Mother. Which you would know if you ever saw me,” I snap.
Her friend sits there, mouth open wide and eyes big. “I’m trying to see you now, but you are acting like a little bitch,” my mother says with clenched teeth. “And I will not have you speak to me that—”
“No. You’re acting like a bitch,” I say, interrupting her, and watch as her lips thin. I lean over the table, placing my hands on it. “I have seen you five times in four years. And I’ve been in town for three days, and you haven’t even bothered to see me. I realize I prefer it that way.” I snatch my purse up, throw it over my shoulder, and then grab my umbrella. I walk out of the door with the biggest smile on my face.
JAYCENT
“So you’re thinking fifty floors?” Mr. Harrison asks, looking over the blueprints I had printed off for him.
“Yes.” I nod. “The lot isn’t wide enough to fit the number of rooms you want into twenty floors. In order to get the number you want, we had to go up.”
‘How much more is that gonna cost me?”
“It is going to be a little over what we discussed the other day but still in the range of your initial price.”
Ten minutes later, I’ve finished my meeting with Mr. Harrison, and I’m walking out of my office when I hear my cell ringing. I look down to see it’s Becca. “Hello, beautiful,” I answer.
“Hey, babe,” she says with a sigh.
I come to a stop. “You okay?” I ask softly
“Yes.” She lets out a long breath. “I just called my mother a bitch and stormed out of the restaurant, but you know what? I feel great.”
I smile. “Good for you.” I’m glad she is finally standing up for herself. I hope I’m helping her do that.
“Yeah. It ... felt good. Is that wrong?”
“No,” I say, shaking my head to myself. “There is nothing wrong with standing up for yourself.”
“I tried to be nice.” I can hear the turmoil in her voice. That maybe she thinks she did the wrong thing. “She asked me about my plans, and I don’t know why, but I told her about the store. She pretty much tore it to shreds. And I got defensive when she started talking about her store and how her name was not going to be on homeless people. Then she blamed it all on Ashlyn. I just couldn’t take it anymore.”
“You shouldn’t have had to take it at all,” I tell her.
“I know. It’s just I’m not used to that. I feel like sometimes it was just easier when I was away.”
My heart sinks at that statement. “Don’t say things like that.” Please don’t leave me again.
“Now all I can think of is that she’s gonna go open a store, just so I can’t.”
I snort. “Even if she did, you can still open yours. I’d go talk to your dad,” I tell her. I know him; he’s a businessman. He would see her side of the coin and understand she is trying to make a difference. And he would understand that giving would be better for the O’Kane name rather than making only expensive shit that her mother’s friends can afford.
“I may do that tomorrow,” she says.
“Did you eat anything?” I ask, trying to get her mind off her mother.
“Nope.”
“Want to meet for lunch?” I have a conference call in fifteen but then have an hour before my next meeting.
“That’s okay.” She sighs. “I’m gonna head home. Ashlyn was meeting Ryder for lunch, so she should be home soon.”
“Okay.” There’s a long pause before I speak again. “Remember, Becca; there’s nothing wrong with fighting for what you believe in. And just because your mother doesn’t believe in it doesn’t mean it’s not possible.”
“You always know just what to say,” she says, and I can hear that smile return.
“Years of practice,” I say jokingly.
She laughs. “Will I see you tonight?”
I smile. “Do you want to see me?”
“Yes,” she answers timidly.
“Then I’ll see you tonight.”
We hang up, and I spend an hour on a conference call with a man who wants a resort designed in Cozumel. Once that call is over, I make my way over to O’Kane’s investments. His building isn’t far from mine, so we often visit the other’s just to see what’s going on. Plus, we sometimes work together. They buy the property, and I design the buildings. It’s quite handy.
I get off the elevator, and Tim’s assistant that I know by Jessica is crying as she holds a box in front of her chest. Ryder’s assistant, Kelly, runs her hands up and down her upper arms as she speaks to her softly.
I make my way to Ryder’s office to find him sitting behind his desk with a phone to his ear. “Mr. Cools, I have to take another call. I will get you the paperwork by tomorrow morning.” Then he hangs up.
“What’s going on out there?” I ask, pointing my thumb at his door.
He leans back in his seat and sighs. “My father found out that I slept with Jessica and fired her.”
My eyes grow big. “Well ... that sucks. For Jessica.”
He opens his mouth, but his cell ri
ngs as it sits on his desk. He looks down at it and presses ignore, but not before I see it’s his mother. I debate whether to tell him about my conversation with Becca. He could question how I know, but Becca needs someone else in her corner besides me, and I know Ryder is that someone. “Your mom calling?” I ask, sounding nosy.
He nods. “Third time in the past fifteen minutes.”
“It’s over Becca,” I tell him.
He sits up and places his forearms on the desk. “What? Is she okay?” he asks in a rush and picks up his phone.
I nod. “She’s fine. I just spoke to Becca, and she had lunch with your mother. She got into it with her and stormed out of the restaurant.” I wave my hand in the air as if I don’t know all the details.
“And she told you this why?” he asks slowly, placing his phone back on his desk.
I shrug. “She was pretty upset and needed to talk to someone. She said she had called your office, but you didn’t answer.” I lie easily. It’s a simple lie that he could prove in a matter of seconds. All he has to do is ask his assistant, Kelly. But the fact that the girl who got fired is keeping her preoccupied gives the possibility of her missing the call altogether probability.
He runs a hand through his hair. “Was she crying?”
“No. She actually took it pretty well.” I look around his office and see a red and white checkered blanket wadded up on his couch. A picnic basket sits on the floor, and a few to-go boxes are on a table against the wall. “What have you been doing?”
“Ashlyn and I had a picnic.”
I frown. “It’s raining outside.” I can see it pouring behind him through his windows. It hasn’t let up for over an hour.
“We had one here in my office,” he says simply.
I smile. “Aren’t you getting all romantic.”
I expect him to have a snarky comeback or throw a pen at me, but instead, he just smiles.
His door swings open, and I turn around to see Kelly walk in. Her bleach blond hair pulled up in a tight bun like always, and her lips painted bright red. Her blue eyes meet mine, and she smiles. I look away from her as she continues to Ryder’s desk.
“Your mother has called twice, Mr. O’Kane.”
“I’m not in today,” he replies without even looking up at her.
“Yes, sir.” She turns to walk out but stops next to my chair. “Hello, Jaycent.”
“Hello, Kelly,” I say with a head nod and look her over. She’s wearing a black fitted dress with a red belt that matches her lipstick high on her waist. I’ve seen her wear it before, and at one time, I imagined ripping it off her. Now, nothing sexual comes to my mind regarding her.
She looks over at Ryder and then back at me. He’s now watching us with an amused grin on his face. “I, uh, called you yesterday,” she says, reaching up to run her hand over her tight bun as if there’s a hair out of place. “Are we still on for—”
“I have to cancel,” I interrupt her.
Her face falls. “Oh.” She stands there awkwardly as if she’s waiting for me to tell her when I am available to reschedule, but I don’t. After a few long seconds, she decides to turn and walk out.
We went on one date, and it wasn’t horrible, but it was strictly sex. Unlike Ryder, I don’t mind wining and dining to get a piece of ass. And that was all that I wanted from her, but I know I want more than that from Becca. And I’m not gonna chance what I have with Becca just to make her think I’m still interested.
“Dude, what was up with that?” Ryder asks with a chuckle. “What happened to I’ll crawl for her?” he says dramatically as he places his hands on his chest.
I open my mouth to tell him there’s someone else but stop myself. This is something that Becca and I need to tell him together when she is ready. So I decide on, “I figured hooking up with a girl from your work wasn’t the best idea.”
“I don’t care,” he says with a careless shrug.
“You will after I quit answering her calls, and she starts coming to you wondering why I hit it and quit it.” I shrug. “That’s all I wanted anyway.”
He tilts his head to the side and frowns. “Yeah, I don’t wanna have to deal with that shit.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
BECCA
I sit on the countertop, eating pickles out of a jar when the front door to our apartment swings open. Ashlyn strolls in, her hair a little damp from the rain, humming to herself. “Wow! The date must have gone well,” I say.
She spins around to face me. “What are you doing?” she asks, laughing, and I can’t help but smile at how happy she looks. I’ve never seen Ashlyn in love. It suits her. Her blue eyes shine. Her smile big and she seems to be glowing. Of course, it could be the rain that covers her bare legs and arms. “Thought you were meeting your mother?”
The smile drops off my face, and I shrug. “It ended quicker than I thought.”
“Wanna talk about it?” she asks.
“Not really,” I say honestly. “I’m just gonna sit up here eating pickles.”
She walks over to me and takes the jar from me. “Are you pregnant?”
I choke on the pickle, and she jumps away to keep a piece from hitting her face. “God, no!” I squeak, and worry comes over me. Jaycent and I just had sex for the first time last night in four years, and we didn’t use protection. Could I be pregnant? I take my birth control religiously, but it’s not one hundred percent effective. I’m not, but still, the idea scares me. I’m not ready for a kid. I need to remind him to use a condom next time.
“If you were, whose would it be?” she asks, and I cough. “I mean my money’s on Jaycent, but I would like an insider’s opinion.”
“Stop!” I say, laughing. I knew I wouldn’t be able to get anything by her. Ryder is a different story. He is too into her, but Ashlyn sees everything.
“I know you’re sleeping with him,” she states. “I can see it all over your face.”
My laughter dies, and I look down at my pickle. I’m not ready for everyone to know about me and Jaycent. “You know I wouldn’t tell, Ryder, right? You can trust me,” she adds when I don’t speak.
I nod once, pushing a few strands of brown hair behind my ear. “We had sex...” I pause. “Once.” Not a total lie. We had it once four years ago and once again last night.
She frowns and places the pickle back in the jar. “Since we’ve been back here?”
I shake my head, hating that I’m going to lie to her. But this is how it needs to be right now. I’d hate for her to slip and tell Ryder. “It was a long time ago.” I pretend to count on my fingers as if I don’t know the exact date I slept with him. “Four years ago.”
“When you were in high school?”
“I had just graduated.” I reach out and grab her. “You have to keep this just between us. Please?” I let out a deep breath and try to think of what I can and can’t tell her about that night we shared together.
You know when you’ve had too much to drink? The room starts to sway, and your lips go numb. You are constantly feeling them with your fingers or running your tongue over them to make sure they haven’t fallen off? Well, I’m there.
Conner brought me to this graduation party and then left me when I caught him smoking weed in the back room. He was shotgunning it, whatever the fuck that meant. All I saw was his lips on another girl’s, and I yanked them apart. He stood, yelled at me, and then stormed out. Left me here with no keys or car. Not like I could drive anyway.
I trip over my own feet and fall into a wall. I giggle uncontrollably as the room spins, and a woman comes to stand in front of me. Normally, I would tell her to back up and give me some space, but she offers her hand as she giggles herself, and I accept it.
We both go crashing to the floor. “Arrrre youuu okaaay?” she slurs.
I roll onto my back and look up at the expensive crown molding on the ceiling of the mansion I’m lying in. “Perfect,” I say, making us both laugh.
A man who I remember being in the room with Conner w
hen I caught him smoking grabs our hands and yanks us to stand. His force alone almost has me tumbling forward, but we manage to stay up, and he continues to walk down the hall we were occupying.
“Kasie,” she says, holding out her hand to me.
I shake it. “Becca.”
She throws her arm over my shoulder and leans into me. I have to place my left hand on the wall to keep us both up. “Well, Becca. What do you say about some drinks?”
“Bring ‘em,” I say as the giggles take over me. Fuck Conner! I place my hand over my mouth. Did I say that out loud? The giggles commence again.
Somehow, we make our way into the open kitchen. This room is big enough to hold twenty people, but I bet thirty people are packed in here. People making out. Some look like they’re about to go all the way. Some knocking back drinks from the countertop.
Alcohol litters the floor and table. A container of trashcan punch sits a few feet from me. Earlier when I walked in, I watched a guy grab the trash can and pour four glass bottles of hardcore liquor into it and then starting serving it. I wasn’t planning to drink tonight. I was gonna be our DD. But then Conner decided to be a dick and left me, so I started drinking like a fish. I think that was like two hours ago. He hasn’t come back for me, and I haven’t stopped drinking.
Things start to blur. Colors fade and the room spins faster and faster like I’m on a carousel. My newest friend, Kaaa ... Can’t quite remember her name. But I see her pick up her purse, and then I see her keys dangling. And then she takes my hand, and we’re walking.
“Whoa.” I hear as I’m brought to a sudden stop.
I lift my heavy head to look up into a set of light brown eyes that I have been in love with for as long as I can remember. “Jaaaycennnt?” I slur in surprise, and if my lips weren’t so numb, I would think I was smiling.
“What are you doing?” he asks as his eyes search my face with concern.
“My new friend and I are leaving.” I lift my hand and point at her. She’s making out with the guy who picked us up off the floor in the hall earlier.
Myself (Selfish Series, #2) Page 11