The room is quiet. I stand from the bed and walk to the bathroom, but she isn't there. I guess I'll just have to look. I find my bag lying on the floor by the door. Maybe there are some shorts in there. I grab it and place it on the edge of the bed, unzip it, and begin digging through the contents. I find a pair of my football shorts, step in them, and pull them on.
I walk through the interior of the boat, looking in each room along the way, but don't see her. Where is she? As I walk by a window in the main living space I notice her standing on the deck at the railing. Her curly blonde hair is blowing behind her with the breeze. She's bent over the railing in a black, silk nightie that stops just below her ass, and looking out at the water with her face angled so that I can see her side profile. I wish I had a camera right now. Actually...
I run back to the bedroom and pick up my phone, turning on the camera. When I get back she's in the same stance she was in previously. Her expression is peaceful and she has a slight smile across her face. Knowing I helped put it there makes my day better, hell, my life.
I snap a few photos and slide my phone into the pocket of my shorts. I'm getting those printed. Sliding the door open I walk out onto the deck. Her head turns at the sound and her smile enlarges. "You're up."
"You weren't in bed. What are you doing out here?"
I walk up behind her and place my arms on each side of her, resting my hands on the railing beside her arms. When the breeze creates a vacant place on her neck I kiss her soft skin.
"Couldn't sleep. I didn't want to wake you. You looked like you were sleeping good."
I place my hand on the front of her thigh, sliding it underneath her nightie. "You better be glad we're anchored out in the middle of the ocean away from roaming eyes or else I wouldn't be okay with you dressed like you are. This is for my enjoyment only," I say, running my hand completely up her body, stopping on her breast. Her nipples are now in a hardened state.
"How can you still want it after last night? You aren't tired of me for one day yet?" Her breathing is picking up as she speaks, causing her words to come out uneven.
If only she knew...
I press my front to her back. The shorts are a mesh material. They hide nothing in terms of manhood. My now erect dick is pressed firmly against the crack of her ass, only covered by the thin silk. "Do I feel like I'm tired of you? I could have you on the hour, every hour, seven days a week and still never tire of being inside you. Do you understand?"
She lays her head against my shoulder as I rub my thumb over her nipple. "You could have me twenty-four times a day and I wouldn't deny you one single time. During the last twelve hours we could sleep in between. Waking up that way will never stem a complaint."
I could stay like this with you every single day and never go back to reality...
"Breyson, touch me, please?"
"Have you changed your mind about what we discussed last night?"
"About marrying you before we go home?"
"Yes."
"No. I won't. I want this as much as you do."
I think I'm finally ready to tell Kinzleigh what happened those six months I was gone. I don't like digging into that dark time of my life, but I don't want to go into a marriage with any secrets.
I want to form our covenant alone and in a place that means a lot to us. I wanted to make that pier and that Oak tree two memorable places. I had the Oak tree in my proposal and I'll marry her on that pier. We're in California, so it worked out perfectly.
Kinzleigh can take a year to plan a wedding for all I care, because I'll still be able to call her my wife. I do, however, want her to meet the people that I consider my second family, and to do that she has to know the full story.
I contact what I call my adopted mother and brother once a week as Maria asked me to, but usually when I'm alone at work since I haven't really went into great detail about them yet. I want them at my wedding no matter what I have to do to get them there.
There is also one more thing I want to do. I made the decision last night when I was buried deep inside her. I want to wait until she's my wife to make love to her again. Have we been sexually active since we met, yes, but I want to stop having sex with her as my fiancé and start making love to her as my wife. Two days may not seem like a lot, but when you love someone as much as I love Kinzleigh and that's one way you actually show it, it feels like an eternity.
I move my hand from her breast to her hips and turn her around so that I can look at her. Once she is facing me, I lean her back against the rail. "Good. I will make love to you again as soon as you are my wife in the eyes of God."
She looks at me. "Are you serious?"
I remove one hand from her side, pulling it out from under her nightie, and I brush her curls over her shoulder. "I am serious. I'd like to try and do things somewhat right, even if we haven't thus far. It's only two days and we will be glad we did."
I kiss the outline of her lips, savoring the fullness of them. "I want to spend today and tomorrow studying everything about each other. It's time I told you about everything that happened in my absence and I want to know more about what I missed in your life. You said a lot of things last night that made perfect sense. It's time to lay everything that happened to rest so that when we become one in every possible way, there is nothing left to hold us back. When we step forward as husband and wife I want it to be a new start. Since I've been back we've studied each other's bodies like a road map, but I don't want to ever look back and there be something that I don't know about you. I want to know everything. I do is equal to forever, baby."
She is staring into my eyes. Those green irises are like a wonder of the world. I've never been lost before in anything, except when I'm with her. I can look into her eyes and all thought ceases. I can kiss her and everything that I'm dealing with unravels. There is no greater place to be than next to her.
She smiles so big that it lights up her eyes, causing my heart to falter from the multitude of emotion that it evokes. I'm guessing I must have said something right, though I'm not sure what. "I love to see you smile."
She wraps her hands around my waist and squeezes as hard as she can. "I'm glad I make you happy, because you'll have me for the rest of your life. I want to be the person you confide in. You’re my best friend and I want to be yours. You sure do know your way to a girl's heart, Brey."
"I only want to know the way to one and that's yours."
I tilt her head and kiss her, but this time it's with a different goal in mind. I don't kiss her to arouse her, but to communicate with her from my heart to hers.
I break free before it turns heated fast. It's not something I can help with her. Her cheeks are in the beginning shades of pink already. "The day is yours, beautiful girl. What do you want to do first? Let's have some fun. We will get down to the talking tonight."
She continues to hold on to me, looking up at me with her chin against the center of my chest. "We could take a dip. The water probably feels nice."
I look over her head and the rail at the water down below. I'm getting a panicky feeling at the thought of getting back in the ocean. The truth is I've gotten on a plane again multiple times even though it still gives me slight anxiety, though I will never admit it to Kinzleigh.
There is no doubt going down on that plane was scary, but in your mind it's instant. The second you hit that water you know you’re done for. There is a totally different fear in having to float around exhausted, being bait for whatever hungry animal is swimming around below that you can't see, waiting for your death slowly. If there are shark attacks close to shore, then we are in their territory out here, and a lot slower than them.
I need to stop being a pussy and just do it, but what if something does happen and I freeze, not able to protect her? I'm getting mad. I've never been scared of anything in my life. I mean what are the odds we would actually become shark food today, but then again what are the odds you'll board a plane and end up in a plane crash? Slim, but oh yeah, I was t
hat slim percentage!
"Brey."
I look down and Kinzleigh looks worried. "Huh? I'm sorry did you say something?"
"Talk to me," she says, and a tear trickles down the right side of her face. "What did I say? I'm sorry."
I'm confused. Her lips are starting to quiver. Why is she crying? I swipe it away with my fingertips. "What do you mean, beautiful? You didn't say anything."
One tear turns into more. Shit, what did I do? "Kinzleigh, what's wrong?"
"Tell me what I said that upset you."
"What are you talking about? You didn't say anything that upset me."
She looks down at her arm and I follow her line of vision. It's just now that I realize I'm digging my fingernails into her flesh. "Fuck, baby, I'm sorry."
I let go and inspect it. My fingernails aren't long, but they're long enough that you can see the four crescent shapes forming a single line in the skin over her tricep, from my index to my pinky nail. How did I not notice I was hurting her?
I pull her into me, placing my cheek on top of her head. "Kinzleigh, I am so sorry."
"You went total zombie on me. I've never seen you zone out like that. Seeing you recluse into your head like that crushed me. Don't shut me out anymore. You said you would tell me things."
Her voice cracks. She's really upset. I'm such a fucking dumbass sometimes. "It's the water. I don't think I can get in the ocean yet. The plane thing is still scary, but I have made myself do it enough that I can get through it. The first few times I had no choice, but with this I keep remembering that night, floating around alone, and thinking I was about to die from exhaustion and drowning or become shark bait; whichever came first. I was going over the chances in my mind, but I can't protect you in there if something did happen, because I'm too much of a pussy to be a man. I would turn into a scared little boy, and because of that I can't go in there."
She pulls away from me and looks up at me. Her cheeks are stained with her tears. "I think we need to have this talk now. Everything else can come later. You always start with the bad and end with the good, that way the happy things are the last to cross your mind."
She grabs my hand and leads me across the deck, back to the doors. I follow her through the main area and back into the bedroom until she walks through the bathroom door. There is a large garden tub. She reaches down and turns on the water, feeling it until it's at the correct temperature.
As it begins to fill with water she pours what looks like bubble bath under the faucet of running water, transforming it into a soapy mixture. She stands before me and pulls her nightie over her head, leaving her completely nude. At the sight of her I automatically start to adjust myself. "It's only a bath. I won't push for us to have sex until after we get married, but I think this conversation calls for nerve therapy and a bath is the cure."
I nod and she takes a step closer to me. She grabs the waistband of my shorts and briefs, pulls them out and then down until they fall the rest of the way to the floor. We've showered together, but never taken a bath together. I'm not a bath kind of guy. I don't like the idea of soaking in my own filth or my junk free-floating, but strangely, the thought of doing it with her is enticing.
She steps in first and I follow behind. The water is almost too hot to sit in, but bearable. She sits against one end and me at the other. I grab her foot and begin messaging it in my hand to deter me from having to speak.
"Would you rather talk and me listen or me ask questions and you answer?"
"You ask and I'll answer." Maybe it's easier this way. I can focus on her as I answer instead of getting lost in that maze inside my head.
"What exactly happened on that plane?"
Her voice is almost a whisper and her cheeks are still damp. The sooner I get this over with, the sooner we can leave this behind and never revisit it.
"There was this girl in the seat next to me on the plane. I was looking down at a promise ring I had bought you for Valentines Day when she hit on me. I turned her down. I think she had been drinking anyway. The girl seemed like she had problems. This guy passed by looking at me as if he wanted to kill me, but I brushed it off. The next thing I noticed I had blacked out."
Her eyes look like they are refilling with new tears. I thought we were done with crying. I don't like seeing Kinzleigh cry. I never have. "Why did you black out?"
"I think he hit me over the back of the head. When I woke up he had bound us to the seats we were sitting in. He acted like we were hooking up and I didn't even know her. After that everything happened so fast, but yet slow at the same time. The guy had to be completely strung out on drugs. He pulled out a gun and started talking about how he was bringing the plane down. He shot someone, Kinzleigh. I watched him murder someone in cold blood as if it didn't phase him at all."
"But why?"
My vision is starting to blur as if I'm losing focus, slipping into my mind. The things he said, the looks on faces, the panic, it's all beginning to hit me.
One word. "Her."
"What did she do?"
I fight to stay focused on her beautiful face. "She told me they were high school sweethearts. She got pregnant with a little girl and they got married. They were an ideal couple until she miscarried their second child, his son. Instead of turning to professional help to cope or coping through each other they both used outside sources. He blamed her and turned to drugs, and she felt guilty and found attention in other men."
"He killed all of those people leaving parents without children and children without parents, including his own, all because of an unfortunate accident that was no ones fault?"
"Something like that. I think he just snapped somewhere throughout it all. The guy seriously had checked out mentally...but the crazy thing was that I could actually see in some twisted way that he loved her enough to do anything to keep her, no matter how crazy it seemed to everyone else. I will never know what was going on in his mind, but he almost acted like what he was doing what was best; everyone else just got caught in the crossfire. I guess that is what drugs do for your mental state. You start thinking crazy shit."
I continue rubbing the bottom of her foot. Her pink toenails are covered in bubbles. I kiss the pad of each toe. I've always loved her feet and I usually hate feet. They are weird and dirty, but hers are cute and tiny. I'm getting sidetracked.
"Anyway, the rest happened fast. We both made a video. I sent one to you and promised to send the other to her mother for her daughter. She said it was never going to stop if she didn’t end it. Each time he did something it escalated from the time before, so she seduced him into going to the bathroom in an effort to get the gun. The plan was to take him down and try to get control of everything, but it backfired a little. She shot him, but not in a place that would take him out."
I close my eyes. "They came running down the aisle. He got the gun back at the same time she told me to open the door. He ended up shooting something electrical, causing a malfunction in the plane. It was all for nothing. Do you see why I feel so guilty? I should have done more. I should have tried to get the gun myself instead of standing by while a girl with a toddler at home sacrificed her life trying to save others."
I open my eyes to look at her. "All I could think about was getting back home to you," I whisper. "Something inside kept driving me to fight, but I should have done more. I didn't want to be a super hero, but I feel like the villain."
She pulls her foot out of my hand and changes position to her hands and knees, moving toward me. She straddles my lap and places her hands on my face. "Don't ever feel like the villain." She kisses me with her naked body on top of mine, making it a lot harder to deny myself of her.
Her lips are so soft. I clench her hair in my fists, pulling her closer to me. She stops kissing me and pulls her lips free from mine, separating the two of us only enough she can look into my eyes. "Listen to me."
I wrap my arms around her waist, not wanting to let go. In my arms is the only place she ever needs to be. "The t
wo of us have always been mature for our age, or at least since we met, thus placing us in a mature relationship. This relationship is wise beyond our age. Most teenagers don't love someone like we love each other. We are the minority. Most young adults don't see past fun and partying. The need and desire to love one person generally comes later in life when it's laid out that it's the next step."
She lightly kisses my lips again. "Along the way we were forced to be adults faster than most. Bryce came into our little package deal, so our maturity level increased from what it already was. Instead of being supported by our parents we now have to support ourselves plus one. Somewhere in the midst of everything you've forgotten that we're still just kids. I know you want to be a man, and even at nineteen you are more of a man than some thirty year olds, but you were eighteen when you were on that plane, Breyson. Once in a while it's okay to act your age. You were scared and had never experienced anything like that before. Cut yourself some damn slack."
She has come so far since that gorgeous, skittish girl I stumbled upon wearing a little bikini on that hot summer day at the beach. She was just a girl then, but now she is an amazing woman. I'm one lucky guy and damn proud to call her mine.
I smirk. Her little outbursts here and there always get me in a playful mood, because they are usually unexpected and come at a time when you need them the most. "Have I told you I love you lately?"
She returns my grin. "Maybe not in the last five minutes."
"I do. More than you will ever know."
"I love you more, Brey."
"Impossible."
"That's a matter of opinion, Abercrombie."
"Nope. It's a fact. I'm older, which makes me wiser, and I said so."
Lasting Fate Page 24