Make love. The soft, caressing way he spoke those two words punctured the flimsy wall of resistance she’d tried to erect between them.
“Don’t you mean you wanted to have sex with me?”
He cupped his palm against the side of her face. “If it’s easier for you to deal with that, then call it sex.”
The rapid thud of her heart was causing the thin fabric of her sweater to flutter against her breasts. Did he see it? Did he have any idea how much she was trembling inside?
“None of this—whatever is happening between us—is easy, Jett. I’m trying to use common sense, but you expect me to throw caution to the wind and behave as if there’s no tomorrow. I did that with Barry. I won’t be that reckless again.”
“I’m not Barry,” he reminded her. “I’m older and hopefully wiser.”
“That’s right. That makes you even more of a risk than he was. Because it’s obvious you’re a man who’s sworn off love.”
His eyes narrowed. “Where did you get that?”
With a troubled groan, she started to step around him. “I’m hungry. I’m going to make myself some breakfast.”
He gently but firmly drew her back to him. “We’ll eat in a few minutes. Right now I want you to explain that remark. Has Bella been talking about me?”
She glowered at him. “Not hardly! If I wanted to know something personal about you, I’d ask you. Not anyone else.”
He blew out a heavy breath. “Something made you form that opinion about me. What was it?”
“You don’t have a girlfriend or a wife,” she reasoned. “And I get the feeling that you don’t want any woman on a permanent basis. I think you like living alone. Without anyone to answer to.”
Suddenly the back of his fingers were gently rubbing her cheek and desire flooded the deepest part of her.
“Have you ever thought that I might live alone, because I’ve not found another woman I want to live with?”
She breathed deeply as she fought to hang on to her rattled senses. “Whatever your reason, it doesn’t matter. I can’t allow myself to have an affair with you.”
One of his dark brows arched with speculation. “Who said I wanted an affair?”
He was a lawyer. She was a maid. What else could he want, Sassy asked herself, except a quick romp between the sheets? “Well, whatever you’re asking for, I can’t give it to you.”
To her surprise a slight smile lifted the corners of his lips.
“I’m not asking you for anything, Sassy. At least, not yet.”
She was trying to summon enough courage to ask him what he meant by that, when he put a hand on her shoulder and nudged her toward the working area of the kitchen.
“Come on,” he said. “Let’s cook breakfast. I’m starving.”
* * *
That afternoon, the weather worsened and Jett called his hired hand in to help him haul an extra load of hay out to the cattle. As the truck slipped and spun over the dirt track, Jett wrestled with the steering wheel while Noah braced a hand on the dashboard.
The ranch hand glanced over at Jett. “You worried about the storm or something? You’ve been awfully quiet.”
“Sorry, Noah, I’m not good company today. But it’s not the storm worrying me. This nasty weather will probably blow out in the next day or two. I have a lot on my mind, that’s all.”
Like a perky redhead with honey-sweet lips, Jett thought. Now that she’d agreed to hang around for a while longer, he wondered how he was going to keep his hands off her. And why would he want to, when touching her made him feel more alive than he’d felt in years?
I can’t allow myself to have an affair with you.
Something about her words had stung him on several different levels. She believed the only thing he wanted was to take her to bed and she was partially right. So why should that bother him? Because it wasn’t all about sex. And that troubling fact continued to nag at him.
“Yesterday in the coffee shop I heard about old man Calhoun being in the hospital. Is it serious?”
Jett glanced over at Noah, The big, brawny guy was only a couple of years older than Jett’s thirty-two, but the soulful depth of his dark eyes made him seem much older. It was no secret that some folks considered Noah a drifter who lacked ambition. Some had even warned Jett that he was asking for trouble by letting Noah live in a small cabin on the edge of the J Bar S, but Jett ignored the talk. As far as he was concerned, he’d trust Noah with his life.
“I talked with Orin about an hour ago, and he says his father is better. The doctor plans to keep him hospitalized for a while longer, though.”
After a long, thoughtful moment, Noah said, “Poor old man. He’s so busy worrying about losing the things he has that he doesn’t have time to stop and enjoy them.”
Was that the real problem with Bart? Did he already know that Sassy was a Calhoun and was concerned that she could take the family to the cleaners? Normally that would be a question anyone would take to their family lawyer. But Bart clearly wasn’t seeking Jett’s advice this time. Which could only mean that the old man considered Jett too close to Sassy to be able to confide in him. A fact that was going to make it even harder for Jett to discover the truth. Something he’d like to do long before the DNA results were revealed.
Trying to put a halt to his meandering thoughts, Jett said, “Yeah. Sometimes I think it would be a nightmare to be as rich as Bart Calhoun.”
Noah let out a humorous grunt. “That’s one problem I’ll never have to worry about.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t say that,” Jett joked. “You might decide to take up panning and hit the mother lode.”
“That’s about as likely as me getting married. And there’s no chance in hell of that ever happening.”
The sarcastic remark had Jett glancing over at the other man, but he didn’t make any sort of reply. Noah was prickly about discussing his personal life and Jett never pushed the issue. As long as Noah did the work he asked of him, Jett was only too happy to respect his privacy.
“I should tell you, just in case you see her around the barn or the house that I—that is, Bella and I, have a house guest.”
Noah turned a curious look on him. “She? You have a woman in the house? Besides your sister?”
Jett frowned. “You say that like she’s a case of chicken pox or mumps.”
The hired hand shrugged one shoulder. “I’m just surprised, that’s all. I don’t remember you ever having much company. She a relative or something?”
“No. She’s from New Mexico. She came out here looking for a clue to her biological parents. It’s a long story, Noah, but in a nutshell, there’s a chance she might be related to the Calhouns. That’s how I got involved. And that’s why my mind is about to burst. I really don’t know how all of this is going to play out or exactly how I should go about dealing with it.”
“Hmm. Just tell me one thing, Jett, is this woman young and pretty or a wrinkled grandma?”
“Young and pretty. And...pregnant.”
The last word brought a faint arch to one of Noah’s brows. “Oh. So you’re safe. She’s a married woman.”
“No. Single.”
Noah grunted. “There has to be a daddy hanging around somewhere.”
Jett grimaced. “No again. He’s dead. A rodeo accident.”
That brought Noah’s head around. “Aw, heck. That’s tough.”
“That’s only one of the rough spots Sassy’s had in her life.”
“And you feel sorry for her.”
Did he? Jett asked himself. No. He believed she deserved better in life. But she was too capable and spunky to feel sorry for. The morning he’d taken Sassy with him on his feeding rounds, and she’d talked about the cattle and having a ranch of her own someday, he’d been more than surprised. He’d n
ot expected her to know anything about ranching, much less desire that type of life. And though most people would probably laugh at her dreams, he respected her for believing she could achieve them.
“So far, she has my admiration, not my sympathy. And I would like to see good things come into her life.”
Noah solemnly shook his head. “God help you. That’s all I have to say about it.”
A wry grimace twisted Jett’s features. “What? No sage advice? No warnings?”
Noah’s chuckle held little humor. “You’re all grown up. You’ve been through the hearth, home and wife thing. I don’t need to give you advice.” He turned his attention to the passenger window and suddenly barked out, “Put on the brakes! You’ve missed the turnoff to the north pasture.”
Cursing under his breath, Jett stomped on the brakes, then jerked the gearshift into reverse. “It’s this damned snow. I can’t see where I’m going.”
“Yeah,” Noah said with sarcasm. “It’s the snow that’s got you blinded.”
Chapter Seven
Later that night, after the evening meal, Bella left for Carson City to meet up with a friend and take in a movie. Bella had been kind enough to invite Sassy to join her, but she’d politely declined. Now, as she watched Jett throw another log on the fire, she was trying to figure out how she could retire to her room and not make it look as though she was running from his company.
“You don’t like going to the movies?” he asked, as he finished levering the log into place with a poker. “I thought you’d jump at the chance to go with Bella and get away from here for a few hours.”
“Normally I would have jumped at the chance. I love to go out and enjoy myself.” From her seat on the couch, Sassy kicked off her ankle boots and curled her feet beneath her. “But I guess the traveling and everything is catching up with me. I’m feeling a little tired.”
Striding over to the couch, he eased down on the opposite end, and even though three feet of space separated them, it felt like three inches to Sassy.
“You’re not getting sick, are you?”
The faint annoyance on his face made her wonder if he was already considering her a burden.
“There’s no need for you to concern yourself,” she answered more crisply than she’d intended. “I am pregnant, and the doctor said I’ll probably be feeling more fatigued than usual. I’ve been reading up a bit—I got a book when Bella and I were out shopping. But all seems good. I’ll know more when I’m back home and get a full workup from my doctor.”
“Well, I don’t know anything about the health issues of pregnant women. But you’ve had a lot to deal with these past few days. And this morning—that photo of Darci had to be shocking to you. It was to me.”
The photo had knocked her for a loop, all right, Sassy thought. But Jett’s kiss was the thing she couldn’t push from her mind. He didn’t need to know that—she’d already shown the man just how attracted she was to him. There wasn’t any need to remind him of the fact, she thought ruefully.
“The photo got to me,” she admitted. “When I was a child I would look at old family photos that my adopted parents stored in a big shoe box. I didn’t resemble anybody in those photos, and whenever I’d ask my parents who I looked like in the family they’d always laugh and say I had a look all my own.”
“Hmm. Guess that was a gentle way to put it.”
“They were lying to me.” With a shake of her head, she turned her gaze to the fireplace. “That’s the part that hurts the most. Still, I cherish those years I had them in my life. I was happy growing up. And sometimes I even feel as though I’m betraying George and Gloria by searching for my real parents.” Closing her eyes, she pressed fingertips to her forehead. “I’m causing an awful stir in the Calhoun family. And I keep asking myself if any of this is worth the knowing.”
He scooted over two empty cushions until he was at her side, and when he reached for her hand Sassy trembled with anticipation.
“Sassy, I realize I’ve been pushing you about this. But it’s only because I believe that, in the long run, you’ll be happier. Whether it turns out that you belong to the Calhoun family or some other family. Your search will have to go on until you find the truth. Otherwise, you’ll continue to carry around questions and doubts.”
She studied his rugged face and wondered what might have happened if the two of them had crossed paths under different circumstances. Would he have noticed her? Somehow she doubted it, but she would’ve definitely looked his way and tried her best to catch his attention. Now she was different. Now she realized that actually loving a man was far different than simply dating him and enjoying his company.
“I can tell you I’m not a bit happy that the Calhoun brothers are conspiring behind their grandfather’s back.”
“Conspiring? That’s a pretty harsh way of putting things.”
His thumb slid slowly and surely against the back of her hand, and the seductive motion was making it impossible for Sassy to concentrate on his words.
“I didn’t mean to sound harsh,” she mumbled. “But they are keeping things from him. And that’s equally bad.”
“Like hell,” he cursed. “You ought to be happy they want you to be a part of the family.”
Easing her hand from his, she rose from the couch and walked over to the picture window that framed a view of the front yard. Darkness shrouded the tall pines, but a nearby yard lamp shed enough light to illuminate the falling snow and the drifts accumulating against the fat tree trunks.
“If their family is torn apart by all this they won’t be happy. But it’s too late to worry about it now. I told Finn I’d go through with the test. So, good or bad, I’m sticking to my word.”
Rising from the couch, he joined her at the window. “I’m glad to hear you say that. Now, let’s forget about the Calhouns for a moment. This morning you mentioned seeing Lake Tahoe. Would you like to go tomorrow, before I have to head back to work on Monday?”
“Back to work? I had the impression that you worked at your leisure—here from your house.”
He chuckled and the rich, sexy sound warmed her as much as the heat from the fireplace. “I’m not that independent yet, Sassy. I work Monday through Friday out of an office on the Silver Horn.”
“You have that much to keep you busy? Don’t you just deal with wills and legal things like that?”
“I do. But that type of work only happens occasionally. Most of my duties consist of sales contracts dealing with cattle, horses and mineral rights. I have to go through each and every one of them to make sure there are no loopholes that might create future losses or problems for the ranch. One wrong word, like ‘if,’ ‘and’ or ‘but,’ could cost the Horn thousands.”
“I see,” she said thoughtfully. So that meant Jett would be gone for a big part of the day throughout the workweek. The idea should have filled her with relief. Instead, she was thinking how quiet the place would be without him around.
“So, what about Lake Tahoe? Are you game for the trip? It’s only a few miles over to the eastern shoreline. We can see as much of it as you want, then drive up to Reno and have lunch.”
Her heart was suddenly thumping at high speed. “This sounds like a date,” she said guardedly.
Grinning, he moved closer, and Sassy found herself gazing up at his face, searching the strong, chiseled nuances of each feature, the dark stubble shadowing his jaw. She’d never been so fascinated by a man’s face or so mesmerized by the memory of a kiss.
“Is anything wrong with that?” he asked.
The only thing wrong was her ridiculously happy reaction. Or should she think of it as wrong? She could spend special time with Jett without falling madly in love with him, she assured herself. She was stronger and smarter than to allow her emotions to take control of her.
“Nothing wrong. I’d very much
like to go. But will the snow cause a problem on the highways?”
“The DOT usually keeps the major highways pushed clear. And the snow on the mountains would make for a pretty drive. But I promise, if the roads look treacherous we’ll wait. I don’t want to put you or the little one in danger.”
Such simple words, Sassy thought. But they felt like a ray of warm sun to her. “What time should I be ready?”
“No later than nine-thirty. That should give me and Noah enough time to finish the feeding chores. Is that okay with you?”
She smiled at him. “It’s a date.”
He smiled back at her. Then, all of a sudden, the smile disappeared and he turned his gaze to the window. Long, pensive moments ticked by in silence, eventually prompting Sassy to draw close enough to rest a hand on his forearm.
“Jett, is anything wrong?” she asked gently. “If you’re thinking you’d rather withdraw the invitation, I’ll understand.”
“I don’t want to withdraw anything I’ve said to you or done to you.” He turned toward her, his expression solemn. “I was just thinking how long it’s been since I’ve wanted to be with a woman. And now—here I am wanting to spend more and more time with you.”
“You make it sound like you’ve come down with an illness or something.”
He shook his head. “If you’d been through what I have, you’d understand.” He stared once again at the window and the falling snow. “You’ve probably already guessed that I’ve been married.”
For some reason his revelation struck her hard. “No. But I’ve wondered.”
He sighed. “I divorced Erica more than five years ago.”
“How long were you married?”
“Three years,” he muttered. “Long, turbulent years.”
It didn’t make sense, Sassy thought. His ex was gone and had been out of his life for several years, yet the mere thought of Jett loving another woman filled her with jealousy.
The Baby Truth Page 10