“Well, you must have been stunned when I invited you to make love to me,” she reasoned. “Because you had that same strange look on your face then.”
He closed his eyes and tried not to think too much, feel too much. This evening, on the range, he’d seen for himself that Sassy was good for his kind of life. She wasn’t timid or clingy. She was strong and beautiful and caring. And during the days she’d been so sick, she’d still remained positive and determined to get well. How could he continue to convince himself that she wasn’t the perfect woman for him? That she didn’t belong in his house and in his arms forever?
“I hadn’t expected you to give in, Sassy. You’d vowed you wouldn’t go to bed with me. Not unless love was involved.” His hand stilled in her hair and he opened his eyes to look at her. “Are you thinking that I—I’ve had a change of heart?”
As soon as the awkward question had passed his lips, she drew away from him and sat up on the side of the bed. Confused by her withdrawal, Jett watched her reach for her clothes.
“Don’t worry. Just because I caved in and went to bed with you doesn’t mean I’ve gotten flowery ideas about the two of us.”
Stung by that comment, he stared at her back. “Then why did you go to bed with me?”
Holding her sweater to her breasts, she twisted around to look at him. “Because I wanted to.”
It wasn’t the response he’d wanted or even expected to hear. “That doesn’t sound like you, Sassy. But I guess tonight I’m learning some new things about you.”
She shrugged. “Women are no different from men, Jett. And I realized there’s nothing wrong with me enjoying sex without strings.”
Jett supposed he should be silently shouting with relief that she wasn’t falling all over him and tearfully declaring her love. He didn’t want that. Just as she’d said, he wanted sex without strings, too. Yet hearing her say it made it sound all wrong, made it feel all wrong.
“Well, I guess I should be happy you’ve gotten over all that sentimental stuff,” he said stiffly.
“That’s right. We have a fiery attraction to each other. That’s all there is to it. And you’ve made me see that, while I’m here, there’s nothing wrong with us enjoying the chemistry. Is there?”
The more she said, the worse it sounded, Jett thought. But to point that out to her would only make him look like an idiot and ultimately make her angry in the process. So he went along with her.
“No. Not a thing,” he said in a thin voice.
She started to move away from the bed, but a spurt of frustration had him reaching for her arm and tugging her back onto the bed. “If that’s the way you feel, then we need to make the most of every moment. Don’t you think?”
Hesitancy flickered in her eyes, but then her features softened, and with a gentle smile on her face, she scooted closer and wrapped her arms around him.
“You’re right again,” she murmured.
Sex. That’s all it had been and all it ever would be, Jett thought. And that had to be enough. For the both of them.
* * *
By the end of the week, Sassy realized she was in deep trouble. Going to bed with Jett had given her joys beyond anything she could have imagined. In his arms she felt like a princess being adored by her charming prince.
Maybe a year ago that would have been enough for her. She would’ve probably even believed that what she and Jett were sharing in bed would eventually lead to love and marriage. But the changes in her life this past year had left her older and wiser. She wasn’t a fool. She understood that Jett couldn’t love. Or if he could, he wouldn’t allow it.
Now, the more time she spent in Jett’s bed, the more she was growing to love him. It was a hopeless situation. One that was only going to get worse.
With a wistful sigh, she climbed down from the corral fence where she’d been feeding pieces of carrots to two sorrel mares. “That’s all, girls,” she told the horses. “You’ll have to wait for Jett to give you your supper.”
Starting away from the corral, she caught the sound of an approaching vehicle, and when Bella’s little economy car bounced over the hill toward the house, Sassy didn’t know whether she was disappointed or relieved. With the woman back home, she and Jett would have to contain their desire or sneak to each other’s bedrooms in the middle of the night.
Bella parked beneath the carport and was greeting Mary and Max when Sassy walked up to join her.
“Welcome home,” Sassy called to her.
Turning on her slender high heels, Bella laughed and waved. “Oh, Sassy, hi! I didn’t see you.”
“I’ve been down at the corral feeding the mares a few treats. I saw you coming. Let me help you with your bags.”
Bella opened the trunk. “Thanks. This one is lightest,” she handed a small duffel bag to Sassy. “I don’t think it’s too heavy for a pregnant woman.”
They entered the house through the front entrance and Sassy followed Jett’s sister down the hallway to her bedroom.
“Gosh, it’s good to be home,” Bella said.
She propped her rolling suitcase against the footboard of the bed and Sassy placed the duffel bag alongside the suitcase.
“It’s good to have you home,” Sassy told her, and meant it. She liked Bella very much. Not because she was Jett’s sister, but because she was caring and thoughtful, and treated Sassy as an old and dear friend. “How was your trip?”
Bella groaned. “Long and tiring. But the case is over and our client won, so I can’t complain.” She looked at Sassy and smiled. “So, what’s been going on around here? I got two short text messages from Jett while I was gone and they told me very little. One was something about a calf being born and the other one was to make sure I’d paid the electric bill.”
Hoping she didn’t look as sheepish as she felt, Sassy smiled. “Well, there hasn’t been much going on. A new calf was born,” she told Bella. “And Finn and I did get the DNA test started.”
“Oh. That’s exciting. I want to hear all about it.” Bella sat on the edge of the bed and kicked off her heels. “Just let me change clothes and freshen up first.”
Sassy nodded. “Take your time. I’ll go make coffee.”
* * *
Several miles away, Jett was leaving the Silver Horn ranch house after spending the past two hours helping Orin sift through more old family documents. Other than the unexplained checks that Orin had found the other day, they’d not run across anything else that looked remotely suspicious, and Jett was beginning to wonder if he and the Calhouns, barring Bart, had jumped to the wrong conclusions. Could be that Bart’s reaction to Sassy was nothing more than him being a bastard, that her resemblance to the family was merely coincidental and that the checks actually were for cash.
Was that how he wanted it to be? To find that Sassy belonged to some other family hundreds of miles away from him and Carson City? Oh, God, he didn’t know what he wanted anymore. Making love to Sassy this past week had changed everything. He felt as if he’d been taken by the bootheels and shaken.
She was eight years younger. That wasn’t a huge chasm between their ages, but it was enough to make him stop and consider the problems it might cause. But then why was he “considering” anything, he asked himself. Ever since she’d come to Carson City, she’d been telling him her plans were to return to her hometown of Ruidoso and make a home for herself and the baby. So far, she was sticking to that plan, no matter the outcome of the DNA test. And he could understand why. The Cantrells were wealthy and Sassy was clearly more to them than a maid. No doubt they would help her with any endeavor, whether that was getting a home or an education, or acquiring ranch property. She had friends who would help her get through the pregnancy and be there after her baby was born. So she hardly needed Jett. That meant marriage would be the only thing to hold her, he thought dismally. An
d he wasn’t ready for that.
The insanity of his marriage to Erica had stained every part of his heart and mind. Even after the divorce, it had taken him months before he could step into the house without expecting to hear crying or yelling. It had taken much, much longer before he could look at a woman without feeling cold and sick, before talking to a woman didn’t make him prepare for an argument when he got home. For five long years he’d convinced himself that living alone was all for the best. He didn’t need a woman in his life. And he especially didn’t need to put his heart on the chopping block again.
But now, day by day, hour by hour, it was becoming clear to Jett that any kind of life without Sassy in it would be boring and empty. Did that mean he already loved her?
Love. Love. Damn it, Jett was so sick of the word he wished he could wipe it from his mind. And though Sassy had never even whispered anything closely resembling the word, it popped into his mind each time he laid eyes on her.
She was using reverse psychology on him, Jett told himself as he jerked open the driver’s door of his truck. She was deliberately avoiding the subject just to make him focus on it. So why wasn’t he strong enough to resist her ploy?
Jett didn’t want to even think about the answer to that question as he climbed behind the wheel and started the engine.
He was reaching for the gearshift when he noticed Finn quickly striding across the small graveled parking area to intercept him.
Jett rolled down the window and waited for the young man.
“Jett, I stopped by the office but Kim said you were up here with Dad. Got a minute?”
“Sure. What’s on your mind?
“Sassy.” Finn pulled off his aviator glasses. “My brothers and I would like for you to bring her over one evening to have dinner with us—soon. Think you can talk her into coming?”
Even though it was clear that Finn felt a connection to Sassy, he’d not expected all the brothers to want to include her in a family gathering. Especially since they didn’t know yet if she was a Calhoun. Not to mention that it would cause an uproar with Bart.
Jett frowned. “And risk having Bart threaten her again? I doubt it. I’m not so sure I’d want to subject her to that again.”
Finn muttered a curse word. “Grandfather is going to have to get used to the idea of Sassy being around. And she might as well get used to him.”
For some reason, Jett wasn’t wild about Finn’s suggestion. He didn’t want to give Bart a chance to rip into her again. And if he was being completely honest with himself, he didn’t want to share her company. Not with the Calhouns or Bella or anybody.
Dear God, was he becoming as obsessive and crazy as Erica had been?
No, Jett thought. He’d simply changed. Seeing after Sassy during those long days she’d suffered with nausea opened his eyes about caring for a sick woman. Instead of growing disgusted and weary with the situation, he’d wanted to ease Sassy’s misery. He’d wanted to do anything and everything to make her feel better. No matter how long it took. Was that because he loved her? Really loved her?
Pushing the question out of his mind, he said, “Sassy is pregnant. She doesn’t need to get upset.”
Finn arched a dubious brow at him. “Hmm. For some reason you’re sounding mighty protective of our little redbird.”
Jett believed he was too old and jaded to blush, but the thought of all the sweet, delicious things he’d done to that little redbird these past few nights was enough to spread a wash of heat over his face.
“Finn, I was dealing with Sassy long before any of you met her. I feel...responsible for her. There’s nothing peculiar about that.”
“No,” Finn said with slow thoughtfulness. “Nothing peculiar about a man like you falling for a beautiful woman like her, either.”
Jett opened his mouth to protest, but just as quickly clamped his jaw shut. What was the point in trying to hide this fascination he had for Sassy? It was probably written all over his face anyway.
“Okay, I’ll admit it, Finn, I have...grown fond of Sassy.”
Finn’s grin was broad and suggestive. “Fond? That’s a weak word to attach to a woman as special as Sassy.”
Jett would have expected Finn to be all-knowing about horses, but he’d not expected him to have such wisdom about women. Fond was far too weak a word to describe the way he felt about Sassy. He felt torn, consumed and exhilarated. Mix all those things together and you create one crazy man.
He was staring out the windshield, wondering how he was going to come up with a sensible reply when Finn reached in and slapped a hand on Jett’s shoulder. “I’m sorry, Jett. I didn’t mean to pry. But each time you say her name I can see a spark in your eyes.”
Jett groaned. “Go ahead and say it, Finn. I’m a fool.”
Finn remained quiet for so long that Jett swung his gaze back to the younger man.
“Jett, I still remember what a bad time you went through with Erica. We all remember it. But that’s done and over. It’s time you started believing again.”
“Believing in what, Finn?”
“Yourself, for starters.”
The young cowboy’s words hit Jett like a brick. Was that what he’d done? Stopped believing he could make the right choices? That he could ever have or keep a real woman by his side?
Blowing out a heavy breath, Jett pulled the gearshift into reverse. “I’ll think about that, Finn. And I’ll talk to Sassy about the dinner. She might agree to meeting out somewhere or we could all meet at my house.”
“I’ll leave that up to you and her. Thanks, Jett,” Finn told him, then stepped back and waved him off.
Three hours later, when Jett arrived home, he groaned out loud when he spotted Bella’s car parked beneath the carport. He’d expected his sister to be gone for at least one more day. Her unexpected arrival was definitely going to put a kink in his plans.
Parking the truck, he glanced down at the bouquet of flowers lying in the passenger seat. If he took them into the house, Bella would see them and start asking questions. And Sassy would probably assume he’d gotten them for his sister’s homecoming. She’d never expect the flowers were for her.
The thought put a grimace on Jett’s face. These past few days he’d taken and taken from Sassy. Mainly because he’d been so empty before she’d come into his life that he’d needed so much to fill him up. But it was past time he started giving back to her. And he wanted to start by convincing her that Nevada and the J Bar S were her home.
Entering the house through the kitchen, he spotted Sassy alone at the stove stirring something in a saucepan. The minute she heard him coming through the door, she looked around and gave him a bright smile. Suddenly all the qualms he’d had earlier flew out of his mind.
“Hi, Jett. Did you see that Bella is home?”
Not bothering to remove his hat, he strode quickly over to her. “I did. Where is she?”
“In the living room, making calls, I think.”
He glanced over his shoulder to make sure his sister hadn’t walked into the room. “Good.” He curled a hand around her arm. “Come with me.”
“Jett! My icing is—”
“Turn off the burner. I want to get out of here before Bella interrupts us!”
She did as he asked, and on the way out the door grabbed her jacket. As they walked, she pushed her arms into the sleeves.
“Jett, what in the world are you doing? Why all this hurry? Won’t we have plenty of time to check on the cattle after we eat?”
This past week, Sassy had taken to going out with him in the evenings to check on the cattle. It had become a special time for Jett. To have Sassy at his side as he surveyed his land and livestock made everything feel right and good.
“Noah is feeding and checking on the herd this evening. I have something else in mind for yo
u—us. Just wait.”
“All right. I quit with the questions,” she said. “I’m just wondering what Bella is going to think when she walks through the house and can’t find me.”
He pulled a cell phone from a leather holder on his belt and scrolled down until he found the correct number, then tossed the instrument over to her. “Text her and explain we’ve gone for a drive and will be home later. That ought to be enough.”
As she dealt with the phone, Jett drove them away from the barn area and turned the truck west on a brushy track that led them upward through low, undulating hills scattered with thick chaparral, tufts of sage and dried Indian rice grass.
Sassy remained quiet as she gazed out the window at the passing landscape and Jett was grateful that she’d stopped asking him about where they were going. He needed these moments to gather his thoughts and hopefully form the right words that he needed to say to her.
The road abruptly narrowed as they passed through a fold in the hills. As they emerged on the other side, wide open spaces were suddenly upon them and they were looking at a sea of Joshua trees bathed in a pink-and-purple sunset.
“Oh!” Sassy gasped, as she stared raptly out the windshield. “I’ve never seen anything more beautiful, Jett! Please, stop. I want to get out and look.”
He braked the truck to a stop in the middle of the track. “That’s what I was planning to do.”
She looked over at him in surprise. “Is this why you were in such a hurry? You wanted me to see this place right at sunset?”
He smiled sheepishly. “This is one of my favorite spots on the ranch. I wanted to bring you to see it. The sunset just happened to be here.”
“I’m thrilled that it was!” Shooting him a dazzling smile, she jerked open the door and scurried to the ground.
While she went to stand in front of the truck, Jett lifted the flowers from the backseat, then carefully hid them behind his back as he walked around to join her. She immediately snuggled close to his side, and in that moment, Jett realized that this woman and her child were meant to be in his life. But would she see it that way?
The Baby Truth Page 16