Despite how shocked he appears over the things I laid out for him, Rocco’s lips crash into mine before I can say another word. He kisses me like he has never kissed me before. It’s desperate, frantic, and at the same time amazing, romantic, and perfect. As he holds me, I can feel the splintered pieces of my broken heart mending. The pieces are not being put back the same way they were originally, but I’m fine with that. They are stronger, tougher than ever before. My heart has been forever altered, made just for him.
Rocco leans his head away only slightly, so he can look in my eyes. The intense kiss leaves the both of us a little breathless. He brings his hand up to my cheek to wipe away the last of my tears then runs his thumb along my lower lip as it trembles.
“I need you to be mine,” I whisper.
“Sunshine, I’ve been yours since the moment you walked into my life and I didn’t even know it,” he whispers back. “I’ll always be yours.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Rocco
What the hell was I thinking when I let Alyssa go in the first place? The phone call from Vicki and the thought of something happening to Sunshine really screwed with my head. My reaction was completely irrational and it almost cost me the only girl I have ever loved. The only girl I will ever love. If she didn’t take me back after what happened, it would have been my own fault and I would have been spending the rest of my life miserable and alone. Alyssa Adler completes me. I’m not sure who came up with that saying, but damn it is so true. She is the reason I want to get out of bed in the morning, unless of course, we spent the night together. If that’s the case, getting out of bed is definitely not something I want to do. She makes me feel excited for what the future will bring for the two of us. She just makes me feel.
Showing up at the reception last week was a huge risk to take. The only reason I even attempted it was because Carla insisted Alyssa wasn’t over me the way I thought she was. I missed the ceremony at the church because it took all morning for me to even decide if I was going to go through with it or not. When I got to the reception, watching her walk in when they announced the wedding party holding onto her ex-boyfriend’s arm was rough. The sadness had returned in her eyes from before. While I don’t ever want her to be anything other than happy, it gave me hope. Maybe Carla was right. Then there was the dance. It lasted only about a minute before Alyssa was pushing him away and looking very pissed off. I started to go to her, but some other guy stepped in, almost as if he was waiting for something to happen. Relief washed over her, so I was thankful to whomever he was as long as he knew he couldn’t have her. He walked away holding hands with another girl which made me relax.
Her reaction to whatever Jeff said was about as much as I could handle before I lost it. When her friend finally walked away to dance with her father leaving Alyssa standing alone, it was then or never. The closer I got to her, the more erratic my heart became and breathing was quite difficult. As soon as I was right behind her, my hand instinctively reached out to touch her. The feel of her skin underneath my fingers combined with the smell of her hair sent shockwaves through me. She never flinched. It was almost as though she knew it was me touching her. There was no way she could have seen me. Regardless, she needed to know she was mine and letting her go wasn’t an option for me.
Pure terror raced through me when Alyssa told me to leave. She said it without the tiniest bit of hesitation. Her voice was emotionless and unyielding. Did I screw things up so royally that she wouldn’t want to forgive me? Then she turned around. Her eyes will always give her away. Well, to anyone who knows her as well as I do. Somewhere inside of her, she still had feelings for me and that was all I needed to continue to fight for her. It was not easy at all to get her to even look at me. Watching her try to find an excuse to get away from me was excruciating.
Once I figured out she had no idea I still loved her, it was easier to explain everything. I bared my heart and soul as if I was fighting for my own life. Then she started talking and I stood there waiting to hear her tell me this was the end of us. It wasn’t until she asked me to kiss her that I truly believed what she was telling me. Alyssa needed me as much as I needed her. There was no way in hell we would ever be apart again. How she could still love me after what I put her through was beyond me. I am clearly the luckiest son of a bitch ever. Who knew?
We went back into the reception and she guided me through the tables of guests. Alyssa didn’t stop until she came to one table in particular. There were four people about our age and a couple a little older sitting there. The guy looked up as soon as Alyssa started to talk.
“Dad. Jill. There’s someone I’d like you to meet,” she announced looking up at me adoringly with those gorgeous green eyes and still clutching my hand. I didn’t know her dad and stepmother were going to be there, but it made sense considering she was close with the family. “This is Rocco. These are my parents. Greg and Jill Adler.”
They both stood up and came over to me. Her dad shook my hand. “Nice to meet you, Rocco,” he said.
Jill hugged me and said, “Alyssa has told us so much about you.” I supposed she didn’t tell them everything if they were being nice to me.
We chatted for a few minutes before we sat down and Alyssa introduced me to the other people at the table. They were friends of Alyssa’s from high school. Everyone was very welcoming and pretty cool to hang out with. Her friends were telling me about things Alyssa had done in the past and she was close to disowning them all. She was absolutely adorable trying to threaten them to shut up. When dinner was over, she took me to meet Lori and Dan. I was not expecting Lori to be as sweet as she was to me, since I was the guy replacing her brother.
“That’s enough meeting people for now. I want you all to myself. Come dance with me,” she said dragging me to the middle of the room.
“Sunshine, I’ll go anywhere you want me to go,” I told her as if she didn’t already know.
For the next few hours, Alyssa kept us busy between dancing and taking breaks to sit with her dad. The two of them were very close, that much was obvious. They laughed and carried on like they were old friends rather than father and daughter. Jill invited me to stay at their house the following night. I’m sure she knew I would be staying at the hotel with Alyssa. They left before the wedding was actually over. Her dad pulled me aside just before he walked out.
“Rocco, I wanted to ask you to take care of my little girl,” he started to say. “She’s had enough shit happen to her in the last year, not to mention her lifetime with her mom walking out on her. She means the world to me and I cannot stand to see her upset ever again.”
I’m not sure if he is talking about what happened because of Jeff or between the two of us. “She’s my everything, now.” I glanced over at her standing with Jill watching us. “There’s no way I’ll let anything happen to her,” I said with complete certainty. He just nodded at me and shook my hand in agreement.
“What were you and my dad talking about?” Alyssa asked when I drew her in close as we danced. Thankfully, a slow song had come on giving me a reason to be touching her.
“I think he threatened me,” I replied jokingly.
“My dad would never do that,” she said stunned.
I chuckled at the look she was giving me. “He asked me to look after you. Make sure you stay out of trouble. That sort of thing.”
“Now that sounds more like my dad,” she responded with a smile on her face. “So, would I be getting in trouble if I asked you to take me upstairs to my room?”
My body paused at her unexpected question. Was this some kind of trick? “What did you just say?” I asked for conformation.
It was her turn to chuckle at whatever look was on my face. “I asked my boyfriend to take me to the hotel room that is waiting for me.”
“But the wedding isn’t over,” I told her looking around at all of the people still in the room. “Don’t you have some kind of obligation to your friend to stay until the end since you are part of
the wedding?”
“I think,” Alyssa said sliding her hands down the front of my chest. When she remembered she was trying to say something, she continued. “I think I have more than fulfilled my obligation to my friend. Let’s not forget how she forced me to walk with, talk to, and get my picture taken with my ex-boyfriend more times today then I ever wanted to again in my lifetime. Now, Mr. Matthews, would you please escort me back to my room?”
“Yes, ma’am,” I agreed earning me a beautiful smile once again.
“I just have to grab my stuff,” she told me leading the way to the room just outside the reception area. I took the two bags from her and we left. When we started for the exit that led to the hotel, someone called Alyssa’s name.
“Hey Lyss! You aren’t leaving yet, are you? The party isn’t over,” Jeff could barely get the words out, he was so drunk. “Later, a bunch of us are hitting the bar next door. You should come along. I guess you can even bring your friend here.”
She didn’t even respond to him. She just tugged on my hand she was holding onto and said, “Let’s go.”
“Hey. Don’t ignore me when I’m talking to you!” Jeff shouted at her. Most of the people at the party noticed what was going on.
No way was he going to pull this shit when I was around. “Back off!” I was trying not to yell in his face as I filled the space between him and Alyssa. He took a step back, but didn’t stop.
“Who the fuck do you think you are, anyway? Aren’t you just her lab partner or some shit like that? You don’t know anything about Alyssa. You have no idea how to make her happy.”
“Walk away, Jeff. I don’t want to hurt you, but it won’t take much to convince me otherwise,” I advised the jerk who was slowly making me lose my patience.
“Rocco, let’s just go,” Alyssa said suddenly beside me instead of behind me where I wanted her. Why was she so damn stubborn?
“No, Lyss. Please, don’t go anywhere with him. Come with me,” he begged her.
She looked him dead in the eye and said, “Goodbye, Jeff.”
“No,” he told her. I have no idea what he had intended on doing, but he went at her and that was it for me. Before I could stop myself, my fist hit him right in the jaw. He stumbled backward right into a guy who was just coming through the crowd of people who walked over to see what was going on. It ended up being the dude who danced with Alyssa earlier in the night. Jeff pushed off of him and came back at me trying to swing his arm. His friend grabbed him from behind.
“I leave you alone for two friggin minutes to take a piss and you run right over to get your ass kicked,” he said to Jeff trying to hold him up. “Amazing.”
“He’s trying to leave with my girlfriend. You think I’m just going to let him?” Jeff mumbled holding his jaw. I was about to correct him when someone else did it for me.
“She’s not your girlfriend anymore, Jackass. You lost that privilege when you screwed a complete stranger. You threw away everything you had for five seconds of meaningless sex and you hurt one of my oldest friends. Now get your ass up and get the hell out of my face,” Lori hollered at her brother. His friend gave Alyssa a small nod before helping Jeff walk away.
Dan came rushing up to her side, “Babe? You okay?” She shot him a look of complete aggravation then she turned to me.
“Lori, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to hit him here. He came at Alyssa and I had to do something,” I tried to explain.
“You don’t need to explain yourself for protecting her, Rocco. Besides, my brother was being a jerk and he had it coming,” she said.
“Even so, it shouldn’t have happened here. I’m sorry,” I offered again.
“Apology accepted, then,” she told me. “Lyss, I’m sorry he didn’t listen. My parents are going to freak out when they hear this. They just walked a few people out. Are you okay?” she asked.
“I’m fine,” she answered. “I’m definitely done for the night, though.” Alyssa walked over to her friend and gave her a hug. “Congratulations, again. I am so happy for you both. Have a good time on your honeymoon and we’ll talk when you get back.”
“Thank you so much, for everything. It really means so much to me that you were here today,” Lori told her. “Take care of her for us,” she directed at me.
“Will do,” I assured her. With that, I took my girl by the hand and got her the hell out of there.
Once we cleared the room, Alyssa stopped and inspected my hand. “Are you alright? Does it hurt?”
“Sunshine, I’ve punched harder heads than that before,” I teased to get her to relax. I slipped my hand out of hers and used it to lift her chin, so she was looking at my face instead of my hand. “Are you okay?” I tried to read the expression on her face rather than listen to what she was saying. She tended to keep shit from me.
She sighed. “I’m fine. Where’s your stuff? In your car? Should we go out and get it?”
“It’s freezing outside and you aren’t exactly dressed for it. Think I can leave you here for a few minutes without you getting in trouble?” I asked doubtfully.
She frowned. “You know I don’t go looking for trouble, right? It just seems to find me wherever I go.”
“Yeah, I know,” I said shaking my head. “Stay here and don’t look at anyone. I’ll be right back.”
“Very funny, Matthews. Hurry up before I go to my room without you,” she threatened.
Within fifteen minutes or so, we were entering her room. I was still shocked over the fact that Alyssa was actually mine again and I was really standing in the room with her. She flipped on the light and immediately noticed the flowers I asked to be brought up to her room. They put them on the nightstand just as requested.
“How did you do that?” she wanted to know.
“I asked the front desk to do it,” I cleared up. “You didn’t get to keep the other roses I bought you.”
“What if we didn’t work things out?” Alyssa asked seriously.
“Sunshine, I wasn’t letting you go,” I told her. “I’m nothing without you.”
Alyssa dropped her purse on the table and came over to me. She removed our bags which were still hanging from my shoulder and put them on the floor. “Rocco, I need one more thing from you tonight,” she said as she clasped her hands around the back of my neck.
“Anything. Just name it,” I assured her holding her tight.
“Make me forget,” she said.
“Forget?” I asked.
“Make me forget that we’ve been apart for over a month. Make me forget how empty and lonely I’ve felt. Make me forget you broke my heart.” Not only did I do what she asked of me, I may have even made her forget her own name.
The next morning, we woke up early and checked out of the hotel. Alyssa did not want to attend the brunch Lori and Dan were hosting for everyone who stayed the night. More importantly, she didn’t want to run into someone in particular. Luckily, Jill had dropped her off wherever she met Lori the day prior, so she rode with me to her house. Having her in the passenger seat of my car again made it feel real somehow. Her house was warm, cozy, and welcoming unlike the museum Max insisted my mom live in. When we got there, her parents were already making breakfast for us. After everything was cleaned up, Alyssa and Jill started pulling out their Christmas decorations. For the first time in a very long time, I helped decorate a tree. Occasionally, they would find something that reminded them of her aunt and uncle. You could see the sadness on all three of their faces. This would be a very hard year for them. I would have to try and think of some way to help make it better.
Later that night, the four of us went out to dinner at one of her dad’s favorite restaurants. I had a really good time getting to know Greg and Jill better. They are cool, down to earth people. I was a little concerned they might not let me sleep in the same room as Sunshine, but they never said anything about it. The both of us passed out in a matter of minutes once we got into bed. I wouldn’t have been able to sleep at all if she wasn’t curle
d up next to me, though.
We left fairly early to get back to school Sunday morning. The two hour drive sucked since Alyssa wouldn’t leave her car home. I even offered her the spare set of my keys and told her she could take my car whenever she needed it. She had no plans on coming back home until Winter Break and I told her I was coming with her anyway, so she’d have a ride home. Did I ever mention how stubborn she can be?
Leah and Tyler were already at her apartment by the time we got there. When we walked in and Leah saw the two of us together, she literally sighed with relief. “Well, it’s about time the two of you worked this shit out. It was really getting old trying to convince you how stupid you both were being.” Leave it to Leah to be subtle. “Let’s hear about the wedding.” Alyssa and I looked at each other and started laughing. I’m not really sure why. Punching Jeff really wasn’t funny. We sat down at the table and proceeded to give them the details of what happened.
Over the next week, everything between us picked up right where it left off. I walked her to class when I could. We ate together all the time. She let me be her lab partner again. Our whole group of friends hung out. What I had missed the most while we were apart was laying with her every night until she fell asleep. Those few moments before she drifted off were when I felt how much she loved me and it was in those moments I decided what to get her for Christmas.
Somehow I was able to convince Alyssa to go away with me the next weekend. I made reservations at a small bed and breakfast in a small touristy town in Pennsylvania. My mom had taken me there a few times as a kid. The whole town decorates for Christmas and has different things scheduled on the weekends. After seeing the way she enjoyed decorating at her house, I knew she would love it. We planned to leave right after she was finished class on Thursday afternoon. We wouldn’t get there until later Thursday night, but we’d have all day Friday and Saturday.
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