Or she could take a chance.
She licked her lower lip. “We were intimate.”
His gaze dropped to her mouth, and a low, animalistic growl rumbled from his chest.
It should have terrified her. Made her scramble far away or run for the door. She reached for him instead.
He knifed out of bed and snatched his jeans off the floor. “It’s my fault. I should have given you distance. I gave you my word.”
She needed to stop him. To say something, anything, to keep him from storming away, but her tongue wouldn’t work. Couldn’t, considering the sight in front of her. Muscles, head to toe. Not the overdone weightlifter kind she’d seen on convenience store magazine covers her first day in Evad, but solid, strapping bulk.
And not one stitch of clothing to block his glorious form.
“I liked it.” The confession slipped out as breathy as the moans from her dreams.
He hiked the denim over his perfect ass and twisted enough that the dim lights accented the cut V at his hips. “Come again?”
Her eyes took their sweet time trailing up his torso, committing every inch to memory before she locked onto his stare. “I said, I liked it.”
The twitch at the back of his jaw kicked fast and furious. He finished buttoning up his jeans. “You can’t.”
“Why can’t I?”
He spun so fast she gasped and whacked her head on the headboard. He held his hands out to his sides as though begging for a punch. “For fuck’s sake, Brenna, look at me. Take a good hard look at me.”
Oh, she was looking. And while seeing the back of him completely bare had loosened her jaw, the front scrambled her wits. Especially the fierce erection straining behind his faded denim. He might say he didn’t want her, but his body said otherwise.
“Maxis hurt you,” he said. “Did things no person, Myren or human, should ever inflict on another. I could snap him like a damned twig. Make anyone bleed and scream for hours if I needed to and wouldn’t lose a minute’s sleep.”
“You wouldn’t hurt me.”
“You can’t know that.” He planted a hand at one hip and fisted his hair at the top of his head with the other, his eyes trained on the floor. “I tried, remember? I barely let go, just for a second, and you ran. You think I want that? To see someone as sweet and good as you running from me?”
“I told you, I was flustered. It had nothing to do with you.”
“And I’m telling you I can’t see that again. You’ve already hurt too much. I don’t want to be the one who hurts you more.” He frowned, turned on his heel, and stomped into the bathroom, slamming it shut behind him.
He thought she was sweet. And good. Not dirty and ruined.
Letting out a slow, cautious breath, she let her eyes slip closed. He wanted her. Ludan Forte wanted her. His body wouldn’t lie, not in this. And if he thought she’d ever run again, he was very, very wrong. She’d just have to find a chance to prove it.
Fists braced against the bathroom door, Ludan hung his head and clenched his jaw, fighting back the frustrated roar clawing up his throat. It was his fault. He’d known better than to sleep beside her. Should never have given in to the lure of real sleep.
And look what it had gotten him. As if he didn’t have enough dirty images on his own, now he got to imagine hers, too.
We were intimate.
How in histus could a woman who knew nothing of healthy sex take three simple words and turn them into a plea? His dick had gone from dead to concrete in seconds, more than ready to take her up on the offer.
He pushed away from the door and winced at the unforgivable press of denim against his raging cock. “Fuck.” He ripped the button fly open, and his length sprang free, the air-conditioned temperature doing nothing to cool his thoughts. Leaning back against the door, he tried to slow his breath and erase what he’d witnessed while she’d dreamt. Her eyes might have been closed, but her lips had parted, ready for contact. The way her back had arched and pressed those sweet, hard nipples against her nightshirt.
He fisted his shaft, thrusting his hips against his brutal grip. His conscience lashed him for the weakness. The last thing he deserved was release, but damn it, he hurt. No torture could be worse than glimpsing what she’d be like, seeing how responsive she was, and knowing he’d never experience it in reality.
I liked it.
Her words rattled through him, and fantasy took over. Her lips against his skin and across his chest. Down his abdomen and farther until his shaft brushed her mouth.
Faster he stroked, the memory of how she’d savored her ice cream superimposed on his depraved imagination, her delicate pink tongue licking his glans as she lifted heavy eyelids to meet his stare.
A growl slipped free and release ripped through him, his cock jerking and jetting his seed against his sweat-slick skin. He rode the waves, feeling her with him. The soft give of her breasts against his chest, her warm breath against his neck, the slick clasp of her sex around his dick.
He’d never deserve that. Even if he did, he wouldn’t trust the beast not to hurt her. She was sweet. Giving and gentle, where all he had to offer were rough edges and dirty thoughts.
He opened his eyes, and the bathroom’s cold white tiles shattered what was left of his dim and sultry dream. He was weak, at least where Brenna was concerned. The evidence coated his fist and belly.
Snatching a towel from the rack, he started the shower with a mental push and set the temperature to full cold. No doubt about it. He was the last thing Brenna needed.
Chapter 17
Brenna shifted out of the morning sun and into the shadow cast by Ludan’s body. August in Florida didn’t seem to faze him in the least, but paired with the humidity, it’d sapped what energy she had the minute she’d slid out of the Hummer to the asphalt parking lot. “You sure we can’t watch from in the car?”
Ludan shook his head enough to let her know he’d heard her, but he kept his gaze trained on the second-story apartment. “Not if we want to be able to get a closer look and not tip her off. I can mask us, but not two car doors opening.”
Another polite yet distant response. The same type she’d garnered for two days straight. She’d tried everything short of prancing around naked, but nothing broke through.
She shook the frustration off and focused on the door marked with a black fifty-three. According to Ian’s latest update, her mother lived behind it. The complex looked more like a hotel than other apartment buildings she’d seen. They’d yet to catch anyone coming or going, and Ludan insisted they get visual confirmation before Brenna approached. “What makes you think she’ll show this early on a Sunday?”
“Ian gave me the name of the missing children’s group she volunteers for. They’ve got a booth at the farmers’ market this morning.”
Over a week she’d been home, one disappointment after another dousing the hopeful embers she’d nursed in her years away. This time things would be different. She felt it to her bones, warm and bright as the sun lifting in the sky. The world around her buzzed a little brighter, and her vision went a little glitchy. She clenched Ludan’s bicep to steady herself.
Beneath her palm, his muscles tensed, then slowly released.
Funny, her mother had always scolded her father for being too stubborn. Now here she was poking and prodding a giant who made a brick wall look flexible.
He wanted her. She was certain of it. If the erection she’d glimpsed before he’d stomped into the bathroom didn’t prove it, then the low, broken moan she’d heard behind the bathroom door did. Like a junkie, she’d followed him after his tirade and stood on the opposite side of the door with her forehead pressed against it. With every ragged breath and quick movement that reverberated through the thin partition, she’d built her own fantasy. Imagined his corded neck strained and his eyes shut in bliss while his big hand worked his shaft. She’d nearly collapsed when he found his release, the rumble vibrating down her arms and spearing straight between her thighs.
Before she could focus, Ludan shifted behind her and cupped her shoulders. His warm breath whispered against her ear. “Quiet. You can see her, but she can’t see us.”
A woman with dull brown hair cut in a chin-length bob shuffled toward the metal staircase.
Ludan guided them forward, his steps slow and panther silent. They reached the front row of cars as the woman rounded the bottom stair. Glancing down the parking lot, she hefted her big purse higher on her shoulder, and her keys jangled against the quiet. This close, the gray that lined her hair was more prevalent, and deep wrinkles etched her brow and the corners of her eyes, but it was her. Abby Haven.
Brenna jerked forward, ready to rush the rest of the way there. “M—”
Ludan’s hand covered her mouth, and he pulled her back against him, holding them both still while her mother stopped and tried to pinpoint where the sound had come from. Only when she’d given up and hustled to a little gray car in one of the reserved spots did he lower his mouth to her ear and loosen his grip. “Not yet. You pop out of thin air and you’ll scare her to death. I know where she’s going. We’ll find her there.”
She jerked her head in agreement and tried to calm her adrenaline-overloaded lungs. It didn’t work. Watching her mother back out of the parking spot and drive away made it worse. With every second, a suffocating noose wrenched tighter. “You’re sure you know where she’s going?”
For the first time since he’d woken her from her dreams, he touched her with something more than detached civility. Wrapping a possessive yet comforting hand around the base of her neck, he aimed his confident, beautiful gaze on her. “I’m sure. And even if we can’t find her, we know it’s her now.”
Her mom. Finally, after all this time, she’d have family. Her own flesh and blood. “She looked tired.”
“Ian said she’s never given up looking.” He trailed his hand down her arm and laced his fingers with hers. “Let’s go fix that.”
Something light glimmered inside her, a sensation she hadn’t felt in so long she’d forgotten it existed.
Joy. Pure, unfiltered delight so light and airy it was a wonder she didn’t float off the ground. And Ludan had helped her find it. Had guided and protected her through every moment. “Okay.”
What she lacked in words she made up for in quick footsteps, almost running to the truck.
As if sensing her mood, Ludan kept his silence through the twenty-minute drive.
Would her mother cry? Laugh? Maybe get lightheaded? Since the day Maxis had taken her, Brenna had imaged every scenario possible, but now that real life was close to actually happening, her mind was locked in a state of paralysis.
The traffic drew to a near standstill at a big intersection. On the opposite side was a small lake with families crowded along the shoreline tossing food to a swarm of ducks. White, square-top tents dotted a stretch of land, and black mangrove trees filled the space between them.
“Do you think she’ll recognize me?” Brenna said.
He covered her fisted hand on the center console and squeezed. “I can’t imagine any parent not recognizing their child. Especially one like you.”
Just that quick, her worry disengaged, replaced with the steady hum of anticipation. “Thank you.”
Ludan didn’t answer, but he kept his hand where it was, steering them closer to the market and the ambling crowd ahead.
The second he parked, Brenna yanked the door latch.
Ludan snatched her forearm before she could jump down. “We need to talk first.”
Something in his tone put her on alert. Or maybe it was the worry clouding his eyes.
“No matter what you do, you can’t share where you’ve been,” he said. “Not who I am, or what you’ve seen.”
“I wouldn’t—”
“I know you wouldn’t on purpose, but things can slip. Details that might seem normal to you aren’t normal here. There’s too much focus on Eden and what our race can do. I don’t want you on anyone’s radar.”
Warmth blossomed behind her sternum, and a languid contentment as cozy and soft as a down blanket coiled around her. He cared. More than just as a physical desire, he was looking out for her like he always did. Protecting her the same way he protected the people he loved. “I promise. I won’t say a word.”
He jerked a tight nod and released her hand. Meeting her in front of the Hummer, he ambled beside her through the slowly moving crowd toward the tents beyond. Couples and families meandered from booth to booth, everything from purple and white orchids, to beer, and fresh produce offered for sale. The soft pecan mulch that lined the shaded space gave a muted crunch with each step.
Ludan paused and gripped her upper arm. “You ready?”
Why? Was she here? Brenna twisted and scanned the packed tables around her.
“Easy.” He steadied her with another hand at her shoulder. “Just breathe and focus on me.”
Without conscious direction from her brain, her hands found their way to his chest. She splayed her fingers across his tight pectorals and let his heat seep beneath her anxiety.
He pulled her closer, and his strength wrapped around her like a physical shield. “You’ll be fine. She’ll see you and everything else will just happen.” Tucking her hair behind one ear, he crooked a cockeyed smile. “So, let’s try again. You ready?”
Absolutely. More than ready. “Yeah.”
Stepping to one side, he urged her to the booth behind him. “Then go say hello to your mom.”
The woman they’d seen at the apartment stood no more than fifteen feet away. She leaned over a folding table, smiled at a little redheaded girl, and handed a card to the parents who flanked her on either side.
Brenna crept forward.
Abby’s light soprano voice tripped across Brenna’s senses and sent goose bumps up and down her arms. “We recommend every family have identification cards for their children. It gives first responders all the information they need to get word out on missing children quickly.” She pointed to a spot at the bottom of the card. “If you go to our website, we’ve got an e-identification program, too.”
The little girl’s father picked up two more of the cards, shook Abby’s hand, and waved good-bye.
Brenna’s heart lurched, and for a second her brain offered nothing but white noise. “Abigail Haven?”
Her mother twisted, eyebrows high and lips poised for a warm, welcome greeting—and froze.
Stepping closer, Brenna fisted her hands. “You’re Abigail Haven, right?”
Her mother’s mouth opened, then closed. Then did it again, her lower lip trembling in the process. “Brenna.” It came out like a whisper, but Brenna felt it in every inch of her body. “Brenna, baby, is that you?”
The chatter and laughter of people around them faded into nothing, and her cheeks trembled on a smile she felt all the way to her toes. “Yeah, Mom. It’s me.”
Chapter 18
So many voices. Men, women, children, it didn’t matter. They all overlapped each other. Some talking, some shouting, but every one of them competing for attention.
Ludan shifted his legs beneath the sheets. His quads and hamstrings protested, a relaxed languor permeating the muscles with a sedated weight he hadn’t felt in years. Histus, more like in centuries.
Images flickered in his thoughts, flashes of the dream he’d had fading in an out like a weak radio signal.
But there’d been no noise.
The thought whipped him upright and punched his heart into top gear. He’d actually dreamt. Easy, peaceful dreams with him and Brenna at his father’s lake in Eden. One of those sunset perfect, intimate picnic encounters human marketers used to sell everything from teeth whiteners to ED medication.
He dropped back to the down pillow and stared up at the white ceiling. It shouldn’t be possible. The only time he remembered such deep sleep and vivid dreams was before he’d learned about his gift.
&
nbsp; And the one night he’d dared to sleep beside Brenna.
Vanilla. Just a hint of it scented the air, but it was there. As sweet and innocent as the woman who wore it. He rolled his head and pushed up to an elbow. The pillow beside him had a slight indention. The covers weren’t as messy as his side of the bed, but they weren’t tidy either.
She’d slept with him.
He pushed his senses through the small but tricked-out apartment he’d rented, stretching his power like a translucent bubble and analyzing every energy source.
Brenna’s unique pattern pinged from the kitchen, the same pearl-like ivory most common with humans, but now with shafts of Myren silver and gold woven through it. Remnants of Eryx’s healing influence on her life essence.
Pans clattered from the far end of the apartment, followed by the swoosh of running water. He checked the sun’s position with his mind. Early, not even six o’clock yet, but she was up, dressed, and based on the scent of bacon and coffee, tackling breakfast.
Not once had he seen her sleep in. Not in all the time she’d been at the castle. Granted, the day she’d planned with her mother gave her an extra incentive to get up and around today, but just once he’d like to see her relax and not feel the need to cook or clean.
He tossed the sheet aside and padded to the adjoining bath. As relaxed as he was, he couldn’t decide whether to hug her for the good night’s sleep or throttle her for getting so close. She’d been pushing his boundaries a lot lately. As in constantly. No matter how much distance he put between them, she’d close it and find an excuse to touch him. To tempt him. It was like somewhere between leaving Eden and her dream of them together, she’d shifted from castle mouse to honey badger. If shit didn’t even out soon, he’d lose his damned mind.
Showered and halfway out of his sleep hangover, he stepped into a fresh set of jeans and snatched a light-blue T-shirt. He had to give her credit. She’d handled the meeting with her mom like a champ, standing strong and holding her mother while Abby sobbed like a teenage girl mid-breakup with her first love. Not once had Brenna slipped and spilled details of Eden. Instead, she’d told her mom her disappearance was in the past and something she’d rather not revisit.
Eden's Deliverance (The Eden Series Book 4) Page 14