As she lay awake taking deep breaths, she focused on all the wonderful things Julian was doing to take care of her. He’d always been a generous man, no matter how controlling. It didn’t make her weak. Thankfully, she’d had enough champagne that worry would not keep her awake and soon the ceiling faded to black.
At some point during the night, a warm hand lightly caressed her upper thigh, attempting to pull her from her dream state. Lying on her side, she sensed a body conforming to her shape. Julian knew how much she loved waking up to sex, when your body is at its most calm and natural state, somewhere between sleeping and being awake. But Lexy hadn’t seen Julian’s face when her mind’s eye pictured the man in bed with her. It was Tate’s face she saw. It was Tate’s body she pictured touching hers, skin to skin.
His hand glided from her thigh to her ass, giving it a little gentle kneading that woke her a little further. When his hand landed on her bare breast, that’s when her senses came alive. He stroked her nipples, sending a wave of electricity through her insides and down to her core.
Lexy kept her eyes closed, still live with the image of Tate, and continued to let him do whatever he pleased. Her shoulder tugged back into him and his mouth covered her breast, his tongue delivering soft kisses that made her heart pound radically. Aroused, yet somehow still in that peaceful state, she opened her eyes and saw Julian. A sigh escaped her, reality both surprised and disappointed her, but Julian didn’t seem to notice.
Lexy kept her eyes open, fighting the urge to fall back into her fantasy, as Julian’s kisses trailed from her breasts, down her stomach, and to the border of her panties. He slipped his hand under the satiny material and brought his mouth up to meet hers. “God, I missed you, baby,” he whispered against her lips. “I need to be inside of you, Lexy,” he said as he pushed her panties down. “I need to make you mine again.”
When he kissed her this time, instinctively her eyes closed and there was Tate. She was with Julian. She was marrying Julian. Was a little fantasy so wrong? It didn’t matter what she thought because now she had no control over it. In the darkness, caught between a dream and reality, Tate was making love to her.
***
Something woke her, and she looked at the clock. Four forty-two. The bed next to her was empty. A light from the bathroom and the sound of the shower running spilled through the slightly ajar door. Lexy got up, tossing on a T-shirt of Julian’s, to go to the bathroom. When she opened the door and stepped in, she stood there for several seconds. She watched Julian’s silhouette in the shower, thinking of their painfully ugly last breakup and praying that he’d kept his promise.
A familiar vibration sounded behind her. Julian always had his ringer off. She glanced to his hanging coat. Though it was early, it could have been a business call. Maybe another country, ending their day. She wouldn’t want him to miss it.
With a tentative reach into his pocket, Lexy pulled out the phone and gaped at the screen: a text from contact labeled initial “B” and the message: Received the payment, but I’m done! I can’t do this anymore. Doesn’t seem to matter what I do to screw up her apartment, anyway. Don’t contact me again.
“What the hell are you doing?” Julian’s voice cut through her.
She stared at him for a moment before replying, trying to process what she’d just seen. “Me? I was about to ask you the same question.”
Naked and dripping, Julian stepped out of the running shower and snatched the phone from her. He looked at the screen. “Lex…I…”
“I’m surprised, Julian. You don’t have a cover story ready to feed me?”
“Baby, listen. God, you know how much I love you.”
He reached for her hand, but she pulled it away. She ripped the towel from the rack and threw it at him. “So what? You hired someone to make all that stuff break in my apartment just so I’d move in with you?”
“No…no, it wasn’t like that. I just had someone watching out for you over there because it’s such a crap place, and I didn’t think you were safe in that neighborhood. That’s it.”
“Bullshit! That message was pretty damn clear to me. You promised me, Julian!” She flung the door wider, almost hitting him, and tore over to the bed. She ripped back the covers, searching for the underwear that never made it back on last night. “God, this is so much worse than you getting me fired.”
“Hey, you weren’t fired. And we both agreed that it was best you worked from home.”
“Part-time!”
“You needed the flexibility for your business…and the wedding.”
“That should have been my decision. And what about Cliff Michaels?” She dressed hurriedly, hoping it wasn’t a mistake to bring up Cliff. She’d done nothing wrong in that case. But if Julian had Tate’s card and suspected something, she had to admit she wasn’t totally innocent in her feelings.
“Not even close to the same thing. That douche wanted you. Everyone knew it.”
“Right, but you took care of that didn’t you? I’m sure he didn’t mind an involuntary transfer and moving his whole life to another state.” She pushed past him.
“His work was sub-par anyway.”
“None of that matters because you really crossed the line this time, Julian.”
“Please don’t go,” he said, following her as she gathered her things and headed out of the bedroom. “I know I don’t always make the right choices, but everything I do is because I love you, Lex.”
“Maybe you don’t know what love is, Julian,” she said over her shoulder as they passed through the living room. “It’s not controlling. It’s not manipulating… I’m such an idiot. How many times will this happen before I get who you are?”
“I know. I’m sorry. I swear to God, Lexy…just give me a chance to explain.”
She stopped when she reached the front door. “I’m not one of your employees…okay, shit, I am, but you know what? Not anymore. I quit. I quit the firm, and I quit you.” She pulled the ring off of her finger and held it out to him.
Julian put his hands on his hips, looked down at the floor, shaking his head. “Lex,” he whispered.
The ring slipped from her hand and fell to the carpet, landing silently at his feet. Then, she walked out the door.
Chapter 8
Her apartment gave off an eerie vibe as she pushed the door open and entered. How many times had a stranger been in there screwing around with things? She set her bag down and headed to the place she felt most comforted. In the kitchen, a thought sent a new wave of frustration through her. Why hadn’t she asked for her key back? He’d probably made copies anyway.
She slumped in a bar stool, rested her elbows on the counter, let her face fall into her hands. Her heart raced with anger, but not a single tear fell. As much as she’d tried to deny it, she was ready for this day to come again.
“Hey.” A voice from behind startled her. She popped her head up and turned in her chair.
“Gosh, you scared me. Hey, Mimi.”
“You said it was important. Ray let me in.”
“It is.”
“Wine and ice cream important or shots important?”
Lexy joined Mimi, who had taken a seat on the couch. “I’d say shots, but it’s not even noon.”
“Shit. What did he do this time?”
Lexy attempted a scornful look, but it was no use. Mimi was right, and at least she hadn’t said “I told you so.” Or at least not yet. The story spilled out of her, including the part about finding Tate’s card, excluding the part where she fantasized about Tate in bed.
“Wow, I gotta hand it to Julian. That was actually a pretty damn good idea.”
Lexy sagged and let out a frustrated breath.
“Sorry. But Julian’s getting creative from some of the other crap he’s pulled. Guess he didn’t count on you being so stubborn. He doesn’t know you after all.”
“That’s obviously only part of the problem.”
“Wait a minute. So you didn’t confront him about hav
ing Tate’s card?”
“No, I…”
A grin spread across Mimi’s milky cheeks. “Oh, I get it. You didn’t want him asking questions about Tate.”
“We’re just friends. But, Julian wouldn’t see that.”
“How does he even know about Tate?”
“I don’t know. I guess they must have run into each other here. Tate did say he’d seen Julian before. God I hope they didn’t talk.” Visions of the two men in heated discussion bounced around her already aching skull. “No…that’s not Julian’s style.”
“You don’t seem that upset.”
“I was…I am. I was so pissed.” She looked down at her hands. “I gave him the ring back, but…do you think I made the wrong choice?”
“Wow, you’re asking me?”
“I know, call me desperate.”
She lifted a shoulder while scrunching up her face, then let it fall. “Maybe.”
“Great.” She sighed. “I was hoping you’d tell me I did the right thing.”
“I don’t know. I wish I had someone who loved me that much to be controlling and manipulative.”
A smile managed to get past Lexy’s mood. “You so don’t think like a woman.”
Mimi wrapped an arm around Lexy’s shoulder. “I was trying to think like you. And what about your family?”
“I know. But, my mother wouldn’t want me marrying someone who does things like that. Someone so unpredictable and self-centered.”
“Well…he’s right that it’s not very safe in this neighborhood.”
“You’re seriously siding with him?”
Mimi leaned back into the couch, folding her arms. “Did you know someone broke the lock to the entrance?”
“Jeez, no. Do you think…?”
“No,” they both said in unison. Then, Lexy said, “He was trying to protect me…in his mind, anyway. He wouldn’t do that. I’m sure of it.”
“Well, the Chang’s apartment got broken into last night. Their daughter was home alone when some guy started climbing through the window.”
“Oh, my God. Is she all right?”
“She threw a laptop at his head, and he took off.”
“That’s crazy…and scary.” The news put a serious dent in her will. Damn him! “That doesn’t mean Julian was right in what he did.”
“I know. Anyway, they’re supposed to be fixing the lock today.” Mimi took hold of Lexy’s hands. “Give it some time. See how you feel when you’ve had a chance to think about it.”
“I will.”
“Hey, I’m sorry to leave you in crisis mode, but I have to pack.” Mimi sprang from the couch.
“Pack?”
“Craig’s taking me to San Antonio tomorrow. Totally last minute, I know. ”
“Holy—”
“Don’t say it. Besides, it should be cooler there. Supposed to be another scorcher week here.”
Mimi’s abrupt departure left Lexy feeling lonely and with no one to confide in. Solitude may have been what she needed to think things through, but it wasn’t what she wanted.
Two hours later, she grew tired of listening to her phone being assaulted by calls and text messages from Julian, so she finally turned it off. The doorbell rang, and she hesitated. She wasn’t about to do this again now.
“Lexy?” Tate’s voice came before a knock.
She looked through the peephole before opening it. Something blurred the view.
“Look what I intercepted just before it went out the door.” Tate stood holding a ridiculously large vase filled with lavender and white roses. Her favorite. His bright smile faded when he saw Lexy’s expression. “What’s wrong?”
“Take them back. I don’t want them.”
“Oh…uh.” Tate paused in the doorway, looking from her to the roses and back again.
“Sorry, I don’t mean to be rude. They’re beautiful, but they’re from Julian.”
“Well, yeah. So…”
Lexy held up her left hand and shrugged. Somehow, in the presence of Tate, she felt tears threaten that hadn’t with Mimi.
“Wow, sorry. Are you okay?”
“I will be. Why don’t you take the flowers to your dad. How’s he doing? I haven’t seen him lately.”
“He’s good. I was getting worried for a while there because he seemed so moody. So upset about something, but he wouldn’t talk. He seems better now.” Lexy knew Tate well enough now to see he was following her cues to stick with small talk. “He’s off some of his meds now too, which is great.”
“I’m glad. I know how frustrated you’ve been with him and all those pills.”
“Yep. Well I guess you want to be alone, huh?”
“I guess,” she answered, reluctantly.
“I’m so sorry this happened, Kitten. Just know I’m here for you…as a friend. You’re a strong woman, you’ll get through it.”
It took every strength she had not to break down hearing the words she so often heard from her dad. “Thanks.”
Lexy managed to get the door closed before her eyes puddled with tears. The emptiness in the pit of her stomach, the frustration, the anger, all spoke volumes above sadness or regret.
Images of her mother and aunt swam in her mind. There were other ways. Maybe Julian would still continue to try to help them. Were her family and her business the only reason she’d continue to stay with him? Her emotions kept her from knowing that answer. In time she hoped for more clarity.
***
Later that evening, Tate had shown up with pizza. They ate, drank beer, and played Gin Rummy for three hours. Neither of them brought up Julian.
Lexy allowed herself the “time-out” to recharge and relax before making any final decisions. Tate’s patience and understanding about not pushing her to talk didn’t go unappreciated. The crazy thing was that the time they’d spent together felt the most relaxed and like friends than any other encounter they’d had. Buddies, simply hanging out together felt like just what she needed. There was also another level of closeness developing that she couldn’t ignore.
She’d told Julian to give her some space but warned she probably wouldn’t be changing her mind. He agreed at first, then grew angry and gave her an ultimatum of three days.
The next day, Lexy arrived home from the bank to find a potted blue Hydrangea on her doorstep. The gift itself was telling. Before seeing the card she knew who it was from. A smile took over her face. The card read You’re going to be just fine, Kitten.
The following day, another delivery came. This time a boxed bouquet of wildflowers arrived, which she put in a vase and set on her kitchen table. The note read, Everything happens for a reason. Tate.
She hadn’t seen Tate to thank him in person and didn’t feel that a text was enough. The very next day when she heard a knock at the door, she was surprised and disappointed that it wasn’t him. At her feet by the open door was a cardboard box housing a tiny black kitten. Only the end of her nose and the tips of her paws—like a French manicure—were white. “Oh, my goodness, baby,” she said, reaching in to scoop her up.
As she held the tiny furball close to her chest, she scanned the surrounding area. “What the…”
“Kitten!” Tate jumped out from around the corner. “Isn’t she adorable?”
“Yeah, she’s sweet, but…”
“Hey, I was talking to the kitten.” Tate let loose a wide, sexy smile that made Lexy respond with the same. “And before you say anything, can you just take her for a few days while I find her a home?”
“I don’t know.” Lexy lifted the kitten, holding her inches from her face, melting in the gaze of her tiny, sweet eyes. “Where did she come from?”
“Momma decided to have her babies behind the shop a few weeks ago. Manny took two and I had this little girl left.”
“Is this some kind of therapy?”
“C’mon, you’d be doing me a favor.”
She paused, letting him stew.
“Please. I’ll get whatever you need…and
I’ll buy you dinner.”
Lexy conjured up some reluctance. A beat later, she agreed with a smile. Tate handed her a bag with a few cans of food and promised to return soon with the rest of the things she’d need.
As she closed the door behind her, Lexy sighed with a grin. “I’m going to call you Cupcake.”
Chapter 9
That night, the air conditioning flitted on and off for an hour straight. Afraid it was Julian’s doing, she didn’t bother to call Ray or Tate. She hadn’t considered trying to fix it herself either. Even with the sun down, the heat persisted. Shredding clothes, ice water, fanning herself…all failed attempts at keeping cool. She’d even stood in front of the open freezer door for several minutes. At some point, it would be time to think about whether she should continue living there. Her dad’s lease still had a few months to go, but even without Julian’s constant badgering she’d been having thoughts of finding a newer place.
The pool at Julian’s condo would have been the perfect escape. Now that that was no longer an option, she settled for a cool shower. She moved Cupcake’s box into her bedroom to keep an eye on her. Under the refreshing stream, she ran through her normal routine as her conditioner sat in her hair. Instead of focusing on the emotions of Julian, she centered in on the logistics. She’d already retrieved their application from the bank. Next she needed to figure out next steps for going it alone. No matter what happened between her and Julian, her business would be her independence. An added bonus would be showing Julian she could be successful without him.
Lexy gave her hair that final rinse. Just as she reached down to turn the water off, the lights in the bathroom turned off. “Shit!” She finished turning the knob, wrung her hair out, and then pulled back the curtain. Though it was pitch black, her towel was within reach in its normal spot.
Cupcake yelped in the other room as Lexy dried her body, then wrapped the towel around herself. “I know,” she said back.
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