He kissed her ear.
“And Carley?” Her stomach fluttered. “She knows.”
“Good.” Another kiss.
“And our mothers?” Amanda’s heart pounded, knowing they could be caught any minute.
Jake turned Amanda around snuggling her back against his front. His hands settled at her waist and he swayed his hips to hers. “Why don’t we skip this place, rent a cabin in Colorado, stay naked in front of the fireplace, and spend the New Year together?”
Her voice was raspy. “Denalo’s fashion show is in a few weeks.”
“Show schmoe.” Jake kissed her neck, letting his tongue linger in every crevice. “Let’s tell everyone right now. Get this out in the open. It could be our Christmas present to our mothers.”
Amanda turned her head so she could see him from the corner of her eye. “Not yet.” She held his hands on her stomach and leaned her head back.
He stopped swaying and gave her one last lingering kiss on her neck. “Well, I’m ready to tell them.”
Heat pooled between her legs and Amanda hoped she didn't start panting.
He moved up to her ear and sucked it gently. “I have a little something for you. When can we meet alone so I can give it to you?”
Before she could answer, Carley walked into the kitchen. “Don’t mind me. Keep doing … whatever it was.” She shielded her eyes as she walked to the fridge.
Jake stepped back from Amanda and leaned on the counter.
Carley grabbed a juice box, then turned around. “Ya’ll are too much. Why do you have to hide it? Everyone would love to know you two are an item, since they’ve talked about it since you were ten.”
He held his palms out. “Exactly what I’ve been saying.”
Amanda didn’t know how to explain it. No one would understand her reasoning. “When we’re ready, we’ll tell them.”
The doorbell sounded, interrupting the conversation. Who could that be? They weren't expecting more company today.
Carley leaned against the counter. “Jake says he’s ready. What’s wrong with spreading a little happiness on Christmas day?”
“Exactly.” Jake walked to Amanda and rubbed her back. “That’s exactly what I said.”
Amanda turned and narrowed her eyes. “You know how Mama gets. She’ll have us married by New Year’s. She’s always tried to plan everything in my life. I don’t want her interfering.”
“Mama’s changed, Mandy. You have to give her a chance. Give Jake a chance.”
She looked at the man next to her. He pulled her close by the waist and smiled. “Your sister is a very smart woman.”
“Mandy! Someone’s here to see you.” Amanda’s mom called from the living room.
Carley shrugged. “I won’t say anything, but it’s obvious he’s crazy about you. It’s kind of cute.” She leaned over, squeezed Jake’s cheeks, and then left the kitchen.
“Mandy!” Her mom screeched through the house.
“I better get out there before mom has a conniption.”
Jake touched his forehead to hers. “Whatever you want, Mandy.” He kissed her. “I’m just going to get something to drink and I’ll be right out.”
When Amanda reached the living room, everyone’s hushed silence startled her.
Then she saw him.
Dominic stood at the entrance.
What the hell is he doing here?
Chapter Fifteen
JAKE PUSHED THE KITCHEN door open and walked into a silent living room. “Hey, what happened to the Christmas music?”
He stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of Dominic, on bended knee with Amanda holding a ring between her fingers. She turned around. Her cheeks flushed as their eyes met. What the hell?
Suddenly nothing made sense. Never had he fathomed he’d be in this situation -- watching Amanda with another man’s ring on her finger. Not even a moment ago, they’d been in the kitchen, arms wrapped around each other.
“Ma Chérie, I ask again, will you marry me?” Dominic asked with a pinched expression.
“Wait just a minute,” said Jake. A million thoughts raced through his mind, making him sick. This couldn’t be happening. It was all just a screwed up dream. What he and Amanda had was special.
“Honey, sit down. Amanda’s boyfriend is proposing to her,” his mom called from across the room.
“I should’ve known they got back together,” whispered Libby. “Dominic is still her boyfriend. Not the nicest man but --”
Jake’s jaw clenched along with his fists. “He’s not her boyfriend. I am. We’re seeing each other.”
His mom and Libby gasped.
“Jake.” Amanda’s gaze bounced from place to place.
Jake forced his way to Amanda. His body tensed when Dominic bared his teeth. “How could I not say anything with Pepe Le Pew coming in and acting like he owns you … proposing right under my nose?”
“You again,” Dominic grunted, pushing Jake on the chest.
“Don’t touch me.” Jake drew in a steady breath and clenched his fists. He faced Amanda. “What’s going on?”
Dominic moved closer to Amanda, smoothing the wrinkles in his pants, and put his arm around her shoulder. “Don’t pay attention to him.” He forced the ring from her fingers and held it up in the air. “Try it on. The ring will fit perfectly.”
Amanda shrugged off his arm. “No, Dominic.”
Dominic stepped closer to her and lifted her chin. “You will take it.”
Jake pulled Dominic back, the pulse in his neck twitching. “The lady said no. Now get the hell out.”
Amanda stepped between them. “Jake, I can handle this on my own.”
He glowered. “Shit, Mandy. This clown comes in here, manhandling you, and you expect me to sit back and just watch? Screw that.”
The imbecile had the nerve to stand in front of him, smiling through his teeth, loving every minute of his annihilation of their romance.
Another thought sank in. This one more disturbing than any. “Is this the reason you wanted to keep us a secret? Have you been seeing Dominic, too?” He was nauseous. Pissed and nauseous. He’d finally let his guard down, finally allowed himself to love and envision a future with someone and she was two-timing him.
Caroline gasped. “She dated him while she dated Jake?”
“Of course she didn’t.” Libby scrunched her eyebrows together.
“Well, then, why is he here proposing right under Jake’s nose?”
“Good question.”
“Are you serious, Jake? Do you know me at all?” Amanda’s high-pitched tone echoed across the room.
Joe leapt up from the couch. “Maybe we should leave these three alone.”
“No!” The mothers screamed at the same time.
“No.” Jake mentally ordered himself to calm down and dragged his hands through his hair. He closed his eyes and took several deep breaths. He was the one for Amanda, not this schmuck. His heart drummed a thousand beats per minute with a pain right in the center.
Joe and Gil sat next to their wives, stupefied.
Dominic sidestepped Jake, pushing his shoulder at the same time, and took Amanda’s hand again. “I haven’t heard an answer, Ma Chérie.”
The jerk’s words propelled him to grab the other man’s arm. “She is not going to marry you, asshole.” Jake dragged Dominic the few feet to the foyer and opened the door. “So, get the hell out of here and never come back.”
“But -- ” Dominic sputtered.
Jake slammed the door in his face and turned to a quiet living room.
“Jake Andrew --” his mom screeched from the living room.
Jake flapped his palm out. “Quiet, Mom.” He jammed his hands in his pant pockets and turned to face Amanda. “Now, where were we?”
Amanda’s ears turned red and she covered her face with her hands. “I could’ve done that, you know?”
“You should’ve done it sooner.” He unbuttoned the top button on his shirt as sheen of sweat formed o
n his forehead.
Wide-eyed Amanda scanned the room and put her hands on her hips. “Can we go somewhere private to discuss this?”
He sighed. God, she was exasperating when she wasn’t ripping his heart out. “No. We can’t. We’re going to discuss this right here. Right now.” He fanned his hand around to point out their family around them. “I want everyone to hear, now that it’s in the open.” He licked his lips. “I love you, Amanda.”
It wasn’t the way he planned to tell her, with both families in the room, but it was out now. He reached for Amanda’s hand. When she didn’t pull away, he clasped it in one of his and gazed into her eyes, gently stroking her cheek with the other. “I love you.”
He could feel everyone watching them. It was more than a little unnerving.
“Everybody, I love this woman.” He never took his eyes off Amanda. “I can’t keep it a secret anymore. I’ve never felt like this before -- and I never thought I could.”
Jake reached into his pocket and produced a small box. “I brought this for you. It’s not an engagement ring. Stupid me. I thought you’d like a promise ring, like the old days -- at least for now.” He opened the box. “This is me making a promise to love you and only you.”
Amanda was silent. Her mouth slackened as she examined the ring.
Jake rubbed the back of his neck. For the second time today, she had him on edge. “Shit, Mandy, this is a big deal for me. Say something.”
She swallowed. “You love me?”
“Yeah, I love you.”
“Are you sure?”
He rolled his eyes and smiled. “Mandy, you’re supposed to say something back. ‘I love you, too’ would be nice.”
She smiled, causing his stomach to drop. “I love you, too.”
His heart hammered against his chest. He rubbed her cheek with one hand, then lifted her chin. “Then what’s the problem?”
“I’m scared.”
“Shit, I’m scared, too, but I’m willing to work past that. At some point, we need to have faith instead of fear. Faith in us.”
“I have faith in us now, but what about down the road? We don’t know.”
He took her head in his hands and locked eyes with her. “Baby, you have to trust me. Take the leap and jump.”
“I want to.”
“Then do it.”
“I need more time. I mean, how long until you realize you don’t want to be tied down?”
“I’m sure of my feelings, Mandy. I know I love you. I think you’re the one who doesn’t know how you feel. You need to figure it out.” He held his palm out. “I’m not telling you how to feel, I’m just saying as a courtesy to me, you need to be clear. In fact, I’m so clear of my feelings that I’ll even go for the gold.” He bent down on one knee and grabbed her hand. “Amanda. Marry me.”
She gasped and placed her shaking hand over her mouth. “Oh, Jake.”
“Well?” He raised his eyebrows.
She shook her head and forced Jake to stand. “How do you know you love me? Did you only say that because you saw Dominic proposing?”
“Shit, Mandy.” Jake flinched. “I know what I feel. Maybe you don’t.” He closed his eyes and took in a shaky breath. “Do you want to marry me or not?”
“I don’t think you’re ready.”
“Is that a no?”
Amanda stared at him with glassy eyes and whispered, “I can’t say yes right now.”
His heart shrank and his stomach clenched. He lowered his head, and pulled his hand up to his chin, rubbing firmly. “Fuck.” He stuffed the box back in his pocket and stared at her questioning eyes. “You’re making a mistake.”
Amanda didn’t answer. She only bit her lip and wrung her hands in front of her.
He stared at her one last time, his blue eyes searching her face for answers. When she didn’t say anything, Jake turned to leave.
“Jake, wait!”– she called out behind him.
As much as he wanted to turn around, he didn’t. He couldn’t bear the pain of having his heart broken again. Jake walked out the door and into the dark evening.
Chapter Sixteen
THE WORLD AS AMANDA knew it crashed down around her. Her chest ached and her vision blurred. She curled into the chair and buried her hands in her palms.
She deserved this hurt.
Jake had been the most open she’d ever seen him and she’d run him off. Not sure of what to do next, she drew her legs under her and laid her head against the wall. He was completely right. He’d done everything she asked, and when he asked for her love back, she only messed it up. Her insecurity made her miss the best thing right in front of her. Damn, she’d kill Dominic for revealing her relationship with Jake.
Actually, Jake spoke the truth. Their relationship needed to be open. And she didn’t need time to think, damn it. She needed Jake. All the way. Completely.
She had to find him and explain why she was scared. She had to prove to him that she would take that jump and have faith in them. Her body knew it. Her mind knew it.
Breathing in deep, she heard movement around her and opened her eyes.
“Billy,” Carley called out.
“Shhh, Carley...” Libby walked to Amanda, pushing her bangs to the side.
“Mama Larson!” Billy stood frantically.
Her mother’s comfort was welcome. “Mandy, my goodness darlin’. Jake really loves you. I know you’re all about not having anyone tell you what to do, but you gotta go find him.”
Amanda wiped her eyes, nodding her head. “I’ll fix this.”
Carley and Billy came from behind the couch slowly. “Mama, my water just broke.”
“What? Oh my!” Libby pushed away from Amanda. Orders echoed here and there, footsteps ran up and down the stairs, and everyone ran around in circles. Amanda sat motionless in the chaos.
Haley screamed and ran out the door, “My brother’s coming and I might be a flower girl!”
“Where’s the suitcase?”
“Get the car keys.”
“Turn the oven off!”
Then silence.
In the midst of all the bedlam, her dad bent down to be at her eye-level. “Are you going to be okay, Mandy?”
She nodded. He smiled and kissed her on the forehead. “We’ll see you at the hospital when you’re ready. Use your mama’s car.” He stood and left with the others.
Through the front window, she looked at Jake’s house and wrapped her arms around herself, shivering from the cold air. It was time to take a real risk for once. She had to step outside the box and veer from her plan – take a risk on them.
She ran out her front door, across her yard and up Jake’s path. Pounding on the door, she waited for Jake to answer.
Caroline opened the door. “He’s not here. We don’t know where he went.”
Amanda looked in the driveway and the rental car was gone. She tilted her chin down and frowned. After a beat, she looked back up at Caroline and gave a weak smile. “Tell him I’m at the hospital. I’ve got to talk to him.”
Caroline squeezed her hand. “Will do, honey.”
Amanda turned on her heel and headed to her mother’s car. She tried to fight the nausea that overtook her body. She should be happy for her sister, after all. A fog of helplessness overwhelmed her as she drove to the hospital. Somehow, someway, she had to win Jake’s trust again. She loved him. He loved her. Now what?
****
Amanda sat at her sister’s bedside while the baby slept in the bassinet next to them. Amanda couldn’t stop looking at the baby, so soft and snug. His little, pink fingers curled around Carley’s.
“He’s darling.” A tear fell down her cheek.
“Mandy, not again!” Carley handed her a tissue.
Amanda blew her nose and threw the tissue in the trashcan beside the bed. “Everything makes me cry today.”
Carley’s voice softened. “Have you talked to Jake yet?”
“I tried calling, but he didn’t answer. Facing him
scares the crap out of me. I totally turned him down.” She banged her head on the railing of the bed several times. “He won’t have me back. I embarrassed him.”
Carley held Amanda’s head still. “You are both so blind. Just listen to each other. Stop being so secretive and live.”
Amanda’s misery was like a steel weight. “What if he’s had enough? What if he doesn’t want a relationship anymore?”
“Of course he does.” The baby fussed and Carley picked him up, snuggled him closer with one hand, and grabbed Amanda’s hand with her other. “You better talk to him sooner rather than later.”
“Well, I might need a new brain to do that.”
The door squeaked open slowly and a dark head with blue eyes peeked around the corner. Amanda took a deep breath and wiped at her eyes. When she opened them, Jake stood at the foot of the bed.
“Hey.” They looked at each other for a moment, before he turned toward Carley. “I came to see the baby, and say goodbye.” He stared at Amanda again.
“I’ll be back in a minute.” Amanda scrambled out of the hospital room. In the hallway, she leaned against the wall. He was leaving? She took a deep breath and tried to give herself a pep talk. She’d have to talk to him. Now.
Panic rushed through her.
The door to her sister’s room opened again and footsteps echoed on the tile. She looked up to find Jake standing in front of her. He placed his hand against the wall behind her, his body close to hers. He was so gorgeous, and he was here.
“So, how was your Christmas night?” he asked.
She’d practiced what she’d say during this moment, but the words escaped her.
He shook his head. “My Christmas sure didn’t turn out as expected.”
“Mine either.”
Jake pulled his hand off the wall and stroked her cheek. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking ... well, as much as one can do in a day.”
“Me too –”
“Let me finish.” He put his hands in his pockets. “Amanda, I love you.”
Amanda’s heart lifted. She loved him too.
“Believe it or not, I’ve done a lot of soul searching, with Gil’s help, in the last twenty-four hours. I meant it when I asked you to marry me.”
Time Changes Everything Page 12