by Jane Henry
My stomach plummeted to my feet, but I hid my surprise and discomfort by taking the boxes out of the bags, and opening them. I wore simple, classic clothing at home, t-shirts and jeans mostly, and here were some similar outfits. I pulled out several pairs of yoga pants and dark-colored jeans, a few pretty sweaters. Simple clothes, but ones that I liked. They were comfortable and well made, and wouldn’t make me stand out in a crowd.
I needed that.
I pulled out a pair of jeans and a light green long-sleeved top, then saw a smaller bag at the bottom of the pile. In there I found two packages of panties, several bras, and socks. I took out what I needed, feeling a bit embarrassed knowing Ryder had given instructions for someone to purchase these, and turned to face him. He held a cup of coffee up to his lips, watching me. I swallowed. There was something in his eyes I couldn’t decipher, but I suspected I wasn’t the only one who remembered what had happened the night before with such clarity.
“Need to find out who the man was who took you is.”
I nodded, both sadness and relief coming to me at once. I hated that things were going to change, but I knew that they needed to. The only person I’d ever known, the man who raised me, was likely a criminal, this much I’d gathered. Though I’d been kept apart from the world, I wasn’t completely ignorant. I knew that he was in regular contact with the police force. I knew that he spoke in hushed tones with men in his office, and that he employed several large, scary-looking men who weren’t allowed to talk or come near me. And I knew the way he’d treated me was anything but healthy.
“Yes. Of course.” I turned away from Ryder, hiding the unshed tears that flooded my eyes. “May I go take a shower now?”
“Yeah. You’ll find everything you need in there. Make it quick. I want to eat breakfast, and then we meet Francesca in an hour.”
Francesca?
“I can’t wash my hair and be ready to go in an hour. Do you have any idea how long it takes me to wash this?” I held it up to him to remind him. “Some of us have more than a one-inch spikes all over our heads.”
He placed his coffee cup down on the table slowly, his gaze not meeting mine, as I continued. “So you can’t rush me like that.”
“Don’t wash your hair,” he said, now stalking over to me. I didn’t realize I was backing up until my back hit a chair.
“I can’t not wash my hair. Are you crazy? After all I’ve been through? I have to.”
My fists curled at my sides, and I was angry at him. Why was I acting like such a child?
When he reached me, I let out a little yelp as he wove his hand through my hair and tugged, just enough that my body flamed at his touch, my mouth falling open with a little gasp.
“Watch your tone, Rae.”
I closed my eyes, melting into his touch as he took over once again.
“What tone?” I snapped. “There is no tone.”
He tugged my hair harder, his voice firm. “What’d I say about lying?”
I let out a shuddering breath. “You said not to. You said there would be trust between us.”
“Then don’t lie to me.”
I inhaled, then exhaled slowly. This was what I wanted. This was what I needed. Then why did I fight it so hard?
“Fine. You’re right. My tone was rude. I’m hungry, and scared, and I’m alone with a man who makes my body come to life at the mere sound of his voice. Is that honest enough for you?”
He pulled me closer. “Baby.”
“And I don’t know what will happen from one minute to the next. I have no control over my reactions, no control over my future… no control over anything.”
“Rae.”
I opened my eyes and looked up at him, his gaze both stern and gentle. How did he do that?
He let my hair go and cupped my jaw with his strong hand, bending his head. My heart fluttered, my breath coming in rapid gasps, seconds before his mouth met mine. This time, his kiss was gentle, soothing, nothing like the rough claiming of the night before, but still my body rose to meet him, my breasts swelling, wanting more. When he pulled his mouth off mine I whimpered a little. “You are strong,” he said, tapping my chin. “You are brave. After today, you will have a better idea where we will go from here. But listen to me.” His voice sobered. “Did you hear me?”
He tucked me up against his chest in a hug, his strength awakening my need. I breathed in deep and squared my shoulders when he let me go. “Now go take your shower.”
I walked to the shower, grabbed a fluffy towel from one of the shelves, and noticed that he’d stocked the shower with a variety of girly toiletries I hadn't seen the day before. They looked like nice enough toiletries, so I grabbed a washcloth and some soap and quickly showered, then came out leaving my hair dry and unwashed. Washing my hair was an all-day affair, and I didn't have the luxury of time today. And then I realized with a twinge of sadness this was likely the last day I’d have my trademark hair.
But it was time to move on, to start my new life.
I dressed quickly, and came out to the dining room where Ryder passed me.
“I’m gonna get dressed. Grab something to eat. I didn't know what you liked so I put out a little bit of everything.”
This was new. At home, I was on a strictly regulated diet. I was never allowed to eat sweets, or processed food. So when I spied a tray of pastries, I knew exactly what I was going to eat. I chose a figure-eight shaped pastry filled with cream cheese and some sort of preserves, and a bowl of sliced berries. The smell of coffee wafted in from the kitchen. I wondered what that tasted like…
Was I some kind of child, who’d never been allowed to sample what others did? It made me angry, so when Ryder came out and asked if I’d found what I liked, I snapped.
“Yes, obviously. But I’d like a cup of coffee.”
I couldn't keep the anger out of my voice, though it wasn't directed at him. So much of what I felt had been bottled up for so long I wasn’t sure how to deal with it.
He frowned. “If you found something to eat, then why do you look so pissed off?”
I chewed the pastry angrily. “I don't really know. I'm not angry at you. In fact, I'm kind of embarrassed about how I'm behaving right now, because you've been nothing but good to me, and I don't even really know why you have. I just feel...”
I clenched my fists, fighting the angry tears that threatened to spill. “It all started because I smelled coffee, and I've never been allowed to taste it in my fucking life. And yes, I just swore. I'm not allowed to swear either. And it's ridiculous. I'm twenty years old, and I've been treated like a ten-year-old my entire life, and I know I don't want that anymore.”
A knock came at the door. “Just a minute!” Ryder shouted. Then he leaned down to me and to my surprise, he kissed my cheek, then whispered in my ear, “Rae, there's a lot that you're going to have to work on probably for a very long time. Today is going to be hard for you. You're going to lose a part of yourself, a part of your identity, and you’re going to discuss some very uncomfortable things. But there's something you need to understand. Last night showed me that I want to get to know you better. That you will trust me, and that I might be able to help give you what you need.” He threaded his hand through my hair and tugged. I closed my eyes, sighing, it felt so nice, though it stung a little. “I know that you respond well to this,” he whispered. “So today, I want you to do your best. Be as strong as you can. And tonight, I'm going to reward you.”
He let me go and walked to the door. I smoothed my hands along my thighs, willing myself to calm down. One night with Ryder, and I already knew that any reward would be well worth it.
When he opened the door, I didn’t know what to expect, but it definitely wasn’t a tall, beautiful woman with a mane of vibrant red curls, bright green eyes, and a smattering of freckles across her cheeks. She came in pushing a cart.
“Hello, Master Ryder.”
Ryder reaction was a bit surprising. He frowned. The stern but kind man I’d spent the
night with had become cold, aloof. “What did I tell you about calling me Master outside of the dungeon?”
“But we're still in the club.” She walked past him, and extended her hand to me. “Hello. You must be Rae. I’m Francesca.”
“For Christ’s sake,” Ryder muttered. “Who told you her name? You’re not to call her by name.”
She blinked and stammered, “I—I’m sorry Mas—Sir. Dean mentioned you had a girl named Rae who needed some help with her hair.”
Ryder raked his hand through his dark hair, making some of it stand up at odd angles. He didn’t look silly, though. He looked sexy and sorta roguish. He shoved his hands in his pockets. A muscle ticked in his jaw. “I'm sorry. It’s not your fault, then. I just need to keep Rae under wraps. She’ll go by a different name here.”
I looked at him in surprise. We hadn't discussed this yet, but I thought having an alternative name would be a really good idea.
“I'll be…” I said, immediately thinking of my favorite storybook character Anne Shirley because I was standing in the presence of a drop-dead gorgeous redhead. “Anne.”
His eyes twinkled and one lip quirked up. “Anne with an e?”
“Yes, please.” I smiled shyly at him as Francesca busied herself with lining up a plastic cape, combs, scissors, and a spray bottles.
“As you can see, she has beautiful hair but unfortunately it's a very identifying characteristic. We’re going to have to cut it off.” I ignored the little flip my tummy did.
Francesca's face fell. “I'm so sorry to hear that. It really is stunningly beautiful. What can I do for you?”
I swallowed hard but didn’t blink when I looked at her. “I want you to cut it all off. I want it short… to my chin.” My voice wavered a bit.
Ryder peered at me, and crossed his arms on his chest. “You sure about that?”
I nodded. “Yes. Please.”
“Okay, Rae… I mean, Anne,” Francesca said, coming around to stand in front of me. “We’ll move to the bathroom for easy clean up, and get things started. You ready?”
I inhaled and squared my shoulders, then nodded. “Yes,” I said softly. “I’m ready.”
Ryder’s large, warm hand slid into mine, and he squeezed. A look flitted across Francesca’s face, but she didn’t say anything, just gathered up her things and made her way to the bathroom.
I noted that she knew where his room was. Yeah, he only had a small place, but still. She’d been here before. There was a familiarity to her walk.
She’d been his submissive at one point. I felt it. A sick sort of feeling wove its way through my gut as I followed them.
“Any idea what kind of haircut you want, Rae— I mean, Anne?” Her cheeks flushed and she looked quickly at Ryder. His jaw clenched but he said nothing.
“I have no idea. Something radically different would be good.”
“A bob?”
“Christ, a bob?” Ryder said. “God, no. Do something choppy and layered. Something sexy that accentuates her gorgeous cheek bones.” He released my hand and pointed to the toilet for me to sit.
“You sure you want that?” Francesca asked, and I nodded.
“Yeah, I just want this done.” I didn’t look at either of them. They were weird together. I might not have been wise to the ways of the world, but I knew that they’d had something, and it was uncomfortable.
“And black,” I said. “Let’s go for black, shoulder length, layered, long bangs in front. I like the sound of that.”
Francesca grinned. “I do, too. I have some color-tinting contacts, and we’ll do your makeup quite dramatically. Tonight, you’ll be introduced as Master Ryder’s submissive.” Her voice caught a bit at that, confirming my suspicions.
“Perfect,” Ryder said. “I’m going downstairs to check on things. Got a meeting with Seth and Dean. You call me if you need me.” He frowned and looked at me. “I’ll have two men at the door. I mean it when I say call if you need me. Got it?”
I swallowed and nodded.
When the door clicked behind him a moment later, Francesca leaned in and her eyes met mine.
“I’m sorry about that. It was awkward. It is awkward.”
“What’s awkward?” I asked, while she stood and began spraying my hair with water, drawing a thick comb through the length. “This is a detangler,” she said, clearly evading my question. “God, this hair is beautiful. Have you considered donating it?”
“Wait a minute. You didn’t tell me what was awkward yet.”
She sighed and sprayed my hair, drawing her long comb through it. “Me. Him. Us. That’s what’s awkward.”
A little pang of jealousy pricked me. “Oh? Were you… dating?”
I couldn’t see her face, because she now stood behind me, but her tone was both reminiscent and sad. “Master Ryder and I didn’t work out,” she said.
I didn’t ask any questions. I didn’t want to know. We sat there in silence, until finally she broke the silence. “I asked if you wanted to donate your hair?”
“Oh, right. Donating it? People do that?”
“Oh yes. When people get sick and lose their hair, with chemo or something, they sometimes need a wig, but those are pricey. Sometimes people who cut off their long hair are able to donate it to places that will treat it and make a wig for those who need it. I worked at one place for years.”
So my tragedy could become someone else’s luck.
“Well, yeah, let’s do that,” I said.
She left the bathroom and came back a few minutes later with a large sheet. “Ryder doesn’t need to know we used this. He might not be too happy about his perfect sheets on the bathroom floor.” She winked, her tone derisive, and she tossed the sheet down.
Maybe I could see why she didn’t get along so well with Ryder.
“Okay, honey. You ready?”
I nodded, and sudden tears pricked my eyes at the sight of the sharp shears in her hand, swinging my gaze to focus on the large whirlpool tub. I blinked hard.
“Damn, I wish he’d stayed. You look like you’re about to cry.”
“Yeah,” I whispered, not trusting my voice.
She sighed. “Okay. Keep your hands folded in your lap. Here we go.” At that, I felt the first snip of the scissors, and a great weight fell away. I sat in silence, as she stripped away a part of who I was. I closed my eyes, willing myself to be brave. It had to be done.
9
CHAPTER NINE
Ryder
I hated leaving Rae and Francesca alone. Francesca wouldn’t hurt Rae. I trusted her that much at least. But we’d had a relationship, and it fell flat. I wondered if Rae would ask questions, and how Francesca would respond. Francesca was loyal, though. And trustworthy. But I knew Rae was in a very vulnerable place.
“Any read on her father?” I asked Dean. I leaned against the edge of my desk in my office, looking at both Seth and Dean who’d been waiting for me when I arrived. “Caden find anything?” I’d looked him up myself, and knew his name was Martel, but his track record was clean.
Seth shook his head, his dark eyes stormy. Caden had connections with the local police department, and I knew he could tread lightly, since we didn’t want anyone probing into our business.
“Says there’s no record of the guy having any affiliation with the police department, but that he knows a few other people he can ask, people who are more likely to know more of what’s off the record.”
I nodded. “Keep me posted.”
“Always, boss.” Seth’s dark eyes probed mine. “How is she?”
“She’s good,” I said, not able to make eye contact with him. He couldn’t know I’d taken advantage of her the way I did. It was best if no one knew a damn thing about her, but it was too hard to keep everything quiet.
“You all set?” I asked Dean, who nodded his head.
“Yeah. Got a new name and address and I.D. You said Anne, so we went with that. My man’s finalizing paperwork now, and we’ll get that all underway. He
also has a team of people who work for him intentionally spreading rumors about the new Anne who’s come to Limits.”
“Rumors?” I didn’t like the sound of that one bit.
“Nothing bad,” he said. “Just that she’s your new submissive, and keeps to herself.”
I didn’t like any attention drawn to her at all, even though I asked for this, but I knew how people were. If they didn’t get any information, they’d make things up, and it was better to steer them away from the truth. I hated playing games like this, but it seemed the best way to protect her.
“Fair enough. Let me know as soon as you find anything else about her father.”
Seth didn’t answer at first, which caught my attention. He was always the most attentive, alert member of my staff, and if he was focused on something else, then it was likely worthwhile to note.
“Something on your mind, Seth?” I asked.
He stroked his chin, and turned back to me. “Something very familiar about the guy’s name,” he said. “It isn’t his real name, we’ve figured that much out. Not surprising, either, considering that he had a girl he kidnapped under his roof. How old did you say she was again?”
“Twenty or so,” I said. She should’ve been in college, second year, ready to make her way in the world instead of holed up in some sick bastard’s tower. “He’s likely fabricated her age, too, so he can keep her under wraps. Who knows what the guy’s lied about.”
“Right,” Seth said. “For now, I’m gonna ask around. See if anyone knows anything. I have a few people who might be able to shed some light.”
“Perfect.”
I opened up the calendar on the desktop and looked at our assigned stations. “Tonight, I’m supposed to be taking my shift supervising the dungeon, but I want to be sure I’m available for Rae—I mean Anne. She’s undergoing a major change, and I’m not sure how she’s going to handle things. She was kind of a mess last night.” Until I spanked the sass right out of her and made her climax.
Plus, tonight I’d promised her a reward if she behaved herself. I had plans.