“This is not a discussion,” Orpheus said.
Shaking my head, I searched for the words to make them see reason. “I refuse.”
Jadeon’s iron-clad grip held my arm. “I’m afraid, Ingrid, the decision’s not yours to make.”
CHAPTER 23
Breaking into Anaïs’ flat had been easy.
Using my pick, I’d entered without difficulty. Nothing but quiet greeted me as I trained my flashlight and scanned the pitch-black living room. The window blinds’ effort to shield the room from light was futile at best. The sunlight’s threat was unrelenting. Anaïs would only enjoy this space at night. Everything was the same as the last time I’d visited.
Back when my life had been mine.
Back before it was over.
The morgue had gone up in flames, destroying all evidence of Riley’s murder, and along with it the young female corpse who was meant to be me. My life had been ripped from me. Apparently my dental records had been switched out and all the other talents that Orpheus had mastered over time had been put into action, ensuring they had successfully wiped my life. My funeral was pending.
There was no going back.
They had taken me back to my flat. In a daze, I’d packed what I could with the warning hanging over me that this was it. I’d never be permitted to return. Orpheus and Jadeon had hovered over me to keep me focused. The chance of my neighbors catching a glimpse of the girl who was meant to be dead from a tragic accident at work wouldn’t fair well.
Later that morning, with Jadeon and Orpheus distracted, I’d fled, using daylight as my advantage. I knew it wouldn’t take long before they’d find me. For now, though, the sun was the only factor keeping them away. My ability to avoid their mortal servants from tracking me was all thanks to the skills I had learned at the academy. I was now the hunted.
Curled up in a ball on Anaïs’ living room floor, hugging my knees into my chest, I cried for Riley, cried for Helena, cried for my life wrenched from me.
I deserved it. All of it.
Through these fog-infused thoughts, I realized, other than Lucas, Anaïs was the only other vampire whose address I had. And I didn’t need Lucas’ reasoning right now. What I needed was someone who’d understand my desperation, my spiraling, my willingness to do whatever it took to find Helena. Find Beatrice. Do my part to makeup for the mess I had made.
Only now did I understand Anaïs’ turmoil. How easily it had been to compartmentalize her situation, sort through the evidence and show empathy for Anaïs and the loss of her lover. How many times in my life had I dealt with the grief of others, merely sharing my condolences and not allowing myself to meet victims in their place of pain.
The rawness of all this agony soaked into my bones.
Crawling to my feet, I couldn’t waste another second. Looking around at the several doors leading off to the right and left, I was curious which one led to her bedroom. Sleeping so exposed would be too risky for a vampire. How strange that those we once damn as our enemies come round to be the first ones we turn to in our time of need.
I was going to find those girls.
What Helena and Beatrice might be enduring haunted my every thought and it was hard to think straight. I hated myself for letting them down. The guilt from having encouraged Helena to seek more information on Hauville’s case wrenched at my soul.
These self-indulgent thoughts were out of control and threatening to ruin my focus. My attention fell upon the dining room table, moved over to the open magazine, and found Anaïs’ car keys.
I left her apartment as swiftly as I’d entered and rode the elevator to the subterranean parking structure.
Car fumes reached my nostrils and unsettled my stomach as I made my way along, taking in the collection of luxury vehicles reflecting the wealth of those living above. A flick of the key fob caused a car to flash its lights. Parked between a Mercedes Benz and a BMW sat a sleek black Viper.
Once inside, I breathed in the new leather smell and clutched the steering wheel, feeling the power yet to be experienced. Had this been any other day I might have found this exhilarating. The key turned smoothly in the ignition. Nothing happened. No purr of the engine. No hum of the car starting. Trying to figure out if I needed to deactivate another alarm, I noted the red button to the right of the wheel and with one push the engine purred awake. The wheel was aligned to the left. An odd design quirk that I was going to have to get used to and fast. With a rev of the engine and a slip of the gear stick, I was out of the parking structure and heading south.
The drive through London was uneventful, and I made a concerted effort not to get a ticket and have my supposedly dead self captured on a traffic cam. Once out of the city, I pushed the Viper to the limit.
And made my way to Cornwall.
Carn Brea’s orphanage security alarm was easy to deactivate. I’d have to let Mirabelle know about the weakness in their system. But not today.
Minutes later, I entered the lowest chamber and headed along the dark hallway lined on either side with multidenominational symbols. The door at the end was marked with a pentagram. If what Anaïs had told me during my first visit here was true, this would soon be over and I’d have what I’d come for.
A low growl came from behind me.
Slowly, I turned to face an Alsatian snarling at me. His head was bowed, his teeth bared.
Oh fuck.
I sped toward the door at the end of the hallway, my legs weakening, my heart in my throat. I prayed the door wasn’t locked. The sound of paws scraping along the stone floor revealed just how close he was to reaching me. I yanked open the door and slid through and slammed it shut. Blood pounded in my ears. My hands shook uncontrollably.
Moving quickly, ignoring the barking outside, I bolted down the center aisle with its twenty or so pews on either side and reached the front altar.
I searched for the bottle containing blue illuminate.
At the front of the chapel hung a burgundy velvet drape that ran from the ceiling to the floor. Drawing it back, I found another door. After picking the lock, I entered an even smaller chamber.
There, resting upon another altar, sat that ornate bottle. Bright blue liquid reflected the sunlight flooding in from a skylight, the delicate hue so inviting. Fluid ribbons of red spiraling through the blueness. With the silver stopper out, I sniffed the rosy perfume, a delicate fragrance sweet and welcoming. The essence of a rose garden had been captured and something else too; the scent of a forest at dawn.
The scent of one life ending and another beginning.
Easing a finger inside the neck and wetting the tip, bringing the fluorescent drop to my lips, my taste buds tingled. Carrying the bottle into the corner, I sat on the cold stone floor and leaned back against the wall.
With all I knew about what this stuff could do to me, this was insanity. The deadliest kind.
Don’t do it my reasonable self whispered to me in the dimness.
I wanted those girls safe. I wanted this to be over. I wanted this spell to work.
I lifted the bottle to my lips...
CHAPTER 24
I could fly.
Which was pretty damn fantastic, and I questioned why I’d never had a go at it before. Balancing precariously on the top of the balcony of the sweeping staircase, peering down at that familiar chandelier hanging above St. Michael’s Mount foyer, I felt dizzy with ecstasy.
And leaped off.
The ground came up way too fast.
A strong arm yanked me up violently, forcing all air from my lungs, jerking me backwards and upwards and shooting pain into my ribcage. The drag of gravity caused my head to spin. I struggled against the loss of control, fighting the hands gripping me. The floor blurred. I was carried up a staircase and along a corridor, onwards through a doorway, and then finally thrust upon a four-poster bed. A door slammed, followed by the click of a key turning in a lock.
Stillness.
Blackness.
A blinding fluorescent light forced me to
squeeze my eyes shut, then the light switch clicked off again. My head ached so bad it felt like someone had hit me with an axe. Make that two axes. My stomach twisted with nausea; there was a horrid taste in mouth.
The last thing I remembered was Carn Brea…the chapel…Oh no…
His handsome face came into view, that familiar frown marring his beauty.
“Jadeon?” I rasped.
“Hey.” He was right beside me sitting on the bed.
“Horrible dream,” I said, my voice scratchy.
“You’re safe now.”
“Huh?” I tried to remember how I’d gotten here. This was Jadeon’s bedroom and I had no memory of coming here. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” he said. “I’m glad to see you’re still talking to me.”
A memory sparked in my brain like a lightning bolt. The rest came in a flood: a ruined life, everything I’d ever known now gone, people, places, and my job now inaccessible. Sleep had held the truth at arm’s length, but with waking there came the full force of all that had happened.
“It’s my fault,” I said. “All of it.”
“Nobody else sees it that way.”
I was too weak to push myself up. “Had I not gone to the Athenaeum, Riley would still be alive.”
“Your connection with me put you at risk, Ingrid. That’s why I tried to keep you away from me. To protect you.” He shrugged. “I’m ultimately responsible.”
“You warned me.” My throat felt like sandpaper and I swallowed several times to ease it. “You’re trying to make me feel better and I don’t deserve it.”
Riley had fought for his life in that cold, dark morgue. He’d suffered the cruelest death. Not able to face that right now, my eyes scanned Jadeon’s bedroom. Despite his wealth he’d surrounded himself with simple furnishings. Though the four poster bed was a luxurious touch, everything else in here was modest. Like the writing desk upon which rested the helm of a model boat, seemingly rescued from some catastrophe, the mast crumpled in on itself. It had sentimental value, no doubt. There was a side table with a pitcher of water on it and a single glass beside it. The leather armchair in the corner wasn’t here last time I’d visited and had been brought in recently.
I peeked beneath the covers, grateful to see I had on a T-shirt and underwear. “Where are my clothes?”
Jadeon pointed to the chair where my overnight bag sat. Inside it was all I had left in the world. Those few belongings I’d grabbed before leaving my home for the last time.
“Don’t worry about that,” he said. “I’ll see to it you have an entire new wardrobe. Everything you want and need will be yours.”
“Thank you.” Having always been so independent, it felt strange to rely on anyone for the most basic of needs.
“You left without telling me where you were going.” Jadeon sounded hurt. “I’ve been going frantic.”
“I needed to do something. I knew you’d stop me.”
He rubbed his hands over his face in frustration. A gesture to control what he was on the verge of saying. He was holding back on what he really felt but his taut expression gave away his annoyance.
I deserved his anger. “Riley,” I said. “He shouldn’t have died.”
“I’m sorry,” he said. “Truly I am.”
“Why didn’t you save him?”
“He would never have been happy, Ingrid. We were repugnant to him.”
“He would have come round.”
“Only to kill himself later. It was quick.” He nodded, as though trying to convince himself. “You were there for him.”
“It’s because of me he died. Oh Jadeon, you should have turned him—”
“Sometimes the right decision doesn’t feel right at the time.”
“Helena.” I pushed myself farther up the headboard. “I have to find her.”
“You need to rest.”
I grabbed his hand. “Blue illuminate. I drank the stuff. Did it fry my brain? I feel… weak but other than that…”
“Try to get some sleep.”
“How long have I been out?”
“Two days.”
“What? No, I have to find Helena. And Beatrice. Find whoever murdered Eden.”
“You’re suffering from aftereffects.” He squeezed my hand. “Ingrid, you didn’t drink blue illuminate.”
I was stunned, hating the idea of a repeat from last time. “Orpheus switched it out again?”
“No.”
My head fell back onto the pillow. “Was I poisoned?” Poisoned myself by drinking the stuff. What had I been thinking?
“Mirabelle found you lying on the floor of the chapel,” he said. “She found you unconscious. Apparently their guard dog alerted them to an intruder.”
“Bloody great Alsatian.” I shuddered. “Did she bring me here?”
“She called Orpheus. He brought you here and then called me. I don’t want to alarm you, but Mirabelle had never seen that bottle before.” He took a few breaths. “For God’s sake, Ingrid, what the hell were you thinking?”
“I needed to solve this case. Put all the pieces together. Most of which I don’t have. Apparently blue illuminate is meant to fire up all your brain cells so—”
“Only it wasn’t blue illuminate. Which is only reserved for vampires, by the fucking way. Which I told you and you didn’t listen. You never listen.”
“Those girls need me.”
“And you think that frying your brain is going to help them?” He clenched his fists.
“You told me it wasn’t blue illuminate.”
“Which would have killed you.”
“Anaïs said—”
“You’re out of your mind do you know that?”
I nudged his arm. “Hey, where’d my sympathetic Jadeon go?”
“I could have lost you. Then what? What point would my life have then?” He grabbed my arm, his face turning to fear. “Ingrid?”
The trembling swept over me, a burning flowing though my veins, my shuddering shook the mattress beneath me. “I feel strange...”
“Ingrid, stay with me...”
The room drifted from view.
The blackness crept into my mind and dragged me under.
I awoke to whispers, the voices familiar. Orpheus sat beside me on the edge of the bed, his brow furrowed and his intense stare critical. Alex lay curled up beside me, his blonde curls ruffled.
“She’s awake.” Anaïs’ said. Her arms were folded across her chest hugging herself; she looked riddled with guilt.
Orpheus gestured he wanted her to step back. He reached for the glass of water on the side table and brought it to my lips. “How’s my hummingbird?”
“Not your hummingbird.” I pushed it away.
“Not yet.” He arched a brow. “Drink.”
I took a sip and accepted the glass from him. “Jadeon?”
“He’s trying to find out what you drank,” he said. “He’ll be back soon.”
My limbs felt weak, my legs still shaky and useless. Embarrassment reigned like a cloud over my head that would never leave.
“You’ll feel better soon,” Orpheus said.
I narrowed my gaze, not trusting his kindness. “How long have I been out?”
“A day.”
Through bleary eyes, I found Anaïs’ face again and she gave a nod to confirm what Orpheus had told me.
“I stole your car,” I said to her. “Sorry.”
“You can have it,” she said. “I want you to have it.”
I let out a chuckle and it sounded crazed. “Something tells me it’s Orpheus’ car I nicked.”
“We can add carjacking to your long list of criminal behavior,” Orpheus said. “Amongst other things.”
“Please tell me I haven’t embarrassed myself too much?”
“No such luck.” Orpheus gave a wry smile.
Alex stirred and opened his eyes, blinking away.
“Ingrid, I’m sorry for everything,” Anaïs said. “Please don’t hate me.
”
“Anaïs,” I said. “We’ve all done what we thought was best.”
“I hate myself, seriously.”
“Anaïs, please don’t do this to yourself,” I said. “I’ve done far worse.”
“She knows she’s messed up, Ingrid.” Orpheus glared her way. “You have a right to be angry with Anaïs.”
“It’s okay,” I told her. “I haven’t given up on finding Beatrice. Once I’m able to stand…” It really did feel as though I could reach into Anaïs’ thoughts, and the sensation of trying to access what she was thinking gave me a strange fluttering in my mind, a cerebral caress of sorts. Anaïs really was hurting over this.
“Did you mean everything you said to me last night?” Alex asked me.
I frowned, searching the far reaches of my consciousness to lead me to an answer.
“You don’t remember?” He looked hurt.
Wondering what my unconscious self had been up to, I said, “Remind me.”
Orpheus grinned. “Let’s just say you’re best buddies now.”
I held Alex’s stare, reassured he no longer seemed to hate me. Still, it was disconcerting to think how we’d gotten to this apparent truce.
What the hell had I been up to?
Alex didn’t seem in the least bit disconcerted. He slid off the bed and stretched, beaming a smile at me as his eyes lit up with affection. Orpheus lifted the jug off the side table and topped up my glass. I rubbed my eyes, missing Jadeon terribly, feeling so vulnerable, so lost.
“You needn’t worry.” Orpheus set the jug down. “You’re safe here.”
“I don’t feel any different.”
“That surprises me,” he said. “Considering.”
“What do you mean?” I said.
“Go find her some aspirin,” Orpheus said.
Anaïs and Alex left the room, closing the door behind them. It was too late to ask them to leave it open. They had inadvertently trapped me in here with him.
“I need to get up,” I said.
“I’m afraid you’re not out of the woods yet,” Orpheus said.
“What do you mean?”
“Good news first or bad news?”
“Can there be any more bad news?”
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