by L. Grubb
Once I’ve wrapped a towel around my hips, I step back to my locker; my cell still ringing off the hook. Pulling it out, I take a deep breath when I see Jay’s name on the screen. I almost feel like sending it to voicemail to give him a dose of his own medicine but I click the green answer button instead and hold it to my ear.
“Jay,” I grunt as I pull my bag out of the locker.
“Bro? I need to see you. Where are you?”
“Ohhhh.” I raise my brows even though he can’t see me. “Now you want to see me? I’ve been calling you for days and- “
“Don’t fuck around, Dante; it’s important. Where the fuck are you?” he cuts me off, practically shouting down the line. I pull the cell away from my ear slightly and shake my head. I knew he was angry but I didn’t think he’d call me like this just to shout at me.
“Fuck, I’m sorry, Jay. If I would’ve known what Jas was… is to you- “
“It ain’t about that, just tell me where the fuck you are.”
“I’m at the gym, I… hello?” I pull the cell away from my ear and swipe the screen, only to see that he’s dropped the call.
What the hell was that all about?
I shrug my shoulders and pull the rest of my stuff out of the locker. Once I’m dressed, I throw the towel in the big laundry bin at the entrance and walk out into the cold night air. Zipping my hoodie up, I look around at the sound of squealing tires and squint my eyes in the darkness, the headlights blinding me as they head straight for me.
I jump back just as the car comes to a stop and notice that it’s Jay. “Get in,” he barks.
I don’t ask him why, instead, I jump in and that’s when I notice the panic on his face.
He checks his rear-view mirror and punches the steering wheel as another set of headlights shines behind us. I wince and hope that his anger isn’t aimed at me because there’s no way I want one of those punches in my face.
I would not be able to pull off a crooked nose if he broke it, hell, who am I kidding, I’d probably look even hotter.
I hold onto my seat as he wheel-spins out of the lot and speeds down the road. I open my mouth to ask him what the hell is going on but promptly close it when I see the other car riding our bumper.
I stare with wide eyes as he takes a corner way too fast and heads straight onto the freeway. He swerves in and out of traffic and after half an hour of driving like a maniac he finally pulls into an underground parking lot, switching his lights off and parking at the far end.
I take a deep breath and wait, not saying a word and checking the mirrors just as much as Jay is. After several minutes of no one following us, I turn around to Jay and raise my brows, silently asking him what’s going on.
“I got word that someone was going after my family, I needed to make sure you were safe,” he tells me, scrubbing his hands down his face.
“Why would someone be after me?” I ask, pointing at my chest.
“It’s best if you don’t know. But its fine, you’re safe now.”
I snort at his answer, if he thinks that he’s gonna take me on some crazy car chase and then tell me someone may be coming after me and not tell me why, then he’s crazy.
“Yeah, that ain’t gonna work.” I twist in my seat and clench my jaw. “You better tell me what the fuck is going on. I ain’t gonna be in the dark about this.”
“Its work related,” he huffs and switches the engine back on. “You need to stay with me until the dust settles.”
I watch him, waiting for him to tell me more but when he doesn’t, I huff out a breath and lean back in my seat. I suppose it was a good thing that we were talking again and we’ll have plenty of time to talk if I was staying with him.
A few days pass and the new me is starting to feel pretty fan-fucking-tastic. I love that I’m acing my classes, I love that I feel I have a spring in my step again and I love that I have some self-confidence back. I’m not sleeping with random strangers, I’m doing my work and studying and I’m enjoying being a normal student.
“You’ve changed so much, I’m actually starting to like you now,” Jas smarts as we walk arm in arm to campus.
“Har har, you liked me anyway.” I wink at her and smile. Something I have noticed over the last few days though is the absence of Dante. Has he finally gotten the message? Is he leaving the game well enough alone?
My thoughts must be written across my face because Jasmine says, “For pity sake, woman, can you stop thinking about him? You wanted to change, you wanted your childish antics to stop. What’s the deal?”
I feel the blush rise onto my cheeks but I’m unsure if it’s embarrassment at being caught in my own head or if it’s anger at her tone. “Don’t speak to me like that. I’m entitled to have thoughts you know.” I glare at her through the slits in my eyes as I narrow them. “Only because I wanted the games to stop, doesn’t mean my feelings for him have dampened. One day you’ll fucking understand it.”
She stops her stride and the shock and hurt written across her face almost has me feeling guilty. But she’s naïve about love, about lust. “How dare you,” she whispers, tears brimming the corners of her eyes. “You know about Jay.”
“Yeah? And what are you doing about that? Tip-toeing around each other like you’re in third grade. And you call the games me and Dante play childish? Girl, your attitude is getting ridiculous. If you like him, fucking go for it. Stop acting like a sixteen-year-old school girl.” I throw my hands in the air, anger and frustration rolling from me in waves. Jasmine is starting to lose the qualities I loved about her when we first met. She’s become quite vindictive in a way and she seems to think others aren’t allowed to feel.
Tears start falling from her eyes as her cheeks tint a light shade of pink. “What’s happened to you, Cal? You’ve never spoken to anyone like this before. Why me? I’m your best friend. Or so I thought.”
I growl, she’s just not getting it. “Jasmine, seriously? Someone needs to open your fucking eyes before you let something go that could be so damn good for you. You’re not naïve no more so stop acting like it. If you like the guy, go for it. If it doesn’t work out? So fucking what, there’s plenty of fish in the sea. But do not tell me what to feel, think or do.” I turn on the heel of my wedges and walk away, tightening my hold on my backpack. I leave her standing there on the green by the statue of President Obama and make my way to my psychology class.
My body is shaking with so much pent up fury that I’m worried that if someone looks or says something to me in a bad way, I’m just going to lose it. Taking deep breaths in, and deep breaths out, I push open the door and take a seat at the back of the lecture hall, brooding and getting lost in my own thoughts.
I haven’t been to college for days now, Jay was adamant that I had to stay at his apartment, ‘just in case’. He still hasn’t told me what’s going on and it’s not like I haven’t tried. Because let me tell you, I have.
I’ve tried everything I can think of to get some information out of him and still nothing. All I know is that it has to do with his work and that at least, I know is shady. So, after a day of moaning and begging him to tell me, I decide to live in the land of luxury and order what I want and watch movies on his gigantic plasma.
“What’s up, bro?” I ask when he sits next to me on the couch with a worried look on his face. I frown at him but don’t bother to ask why he’s worried, after all it isn’t like he’ll tell me what is actually happening. I’m being well and truly kept in the dark and I keep telling myself that it’s the best place to be.
“Nothing,” he says and leans forward, his arms resting on his knees. Lifting his head to me, his eyes swirl with something. I can see that he wants to tell me but he’s holding back. I pause the movie that’s playing and sit up. This may be my chance to find out what is actually going on.
“You know you can tell me anything, Jay.” I lift my brows and watch as his eyes flick across my face, probably trying to see if I’m being honest. He’s always been like
this, assessing. He never did anything without thinking the whole thing through several times. He’s the planner, the one who doesn’t take risks without analyzing every possible outcome. Me? I’m the one who plans nothing, I live in the moment, not knowing what’s coming next and liking the thrill of the unknown.
“Yeah…” he says, scrubbing his hands down his face. “I just don’t want you to know. You’ll be involved then.” He drops his head, his fingers tapping against his legs.
“That don’t matter- “
“It does,” he growls as he brings his head back up to face me. “Listen, I’ve spent years building this business. For six years, I’ve done fuckin’ nothing but this and now it’s being threatened by some new fuckin’ lowlife thinking he can get to me through my brother.”
“I didn’t- “
“No, you fuckin’ didn’t!” he roars, standing up. “You think I’m some fucking drug dealing scum, making money off poor fuckers who are addicted to the stuff. I was caught with just enough for possession. I’m fucking clean as a whistle, Dante. I’m dead fucking straight.” Frowning, I open my mouth to say something but he cuts me off again. “I work my fuckin’ ass off to make sure you have everything I didn’t. It’s me who pays for your car. Fuckin’ me, who makes sure you have money in your account every week.”
“I… I…”
“Everything I’ve done is to make sure you have a better life, and that’s my job,” he says, lifting his eyes back up to me. “But in the process, I lost…”
He looks away again, his focus on nothing but a picture on the wall.
“You lost what?” I ask in a low voice, scared to talk at a normal level. One thing about Jay was that when he got angry, everybody knew about it and you did not want to get in his path so I have to tread carefully because there’s no way I want to wake the beast that lives inside him.
“The girl I was falling in love with.” He turns back to me and raises a brow. “Jas.”
My head rolls back at that. That’s why he was so angry at me. He’d given up everything for me; his education, his girl, everything. Just so I could have the life he thought I deserved and what had I done? I’d played games with Callie and fucked about, not taking any of it seriously.
“But…” I frown looking over at him. “How do you even know Jas? She didn’t go to our school.”
“It don’t matter how I know her.” He grunts, moving towards the kitchen. “I lost her and I’ll never get her back.”
“I’m sure that’s not true,” I say, leaning against the counter. “You know us Frazier’s can woo any woman.”
“Woo?” Jay chuckles. “The fuck you been livin’, bro? Who the hell says ‘woo’?”
“I don’t know.” I shrug but chuckle myself. “It’s a thing that people say.”
I chuckle at Dante as I press the button on the coffee machine. He’s always coming out with these random sayings and I have no clue where he comes up with them. But ‘woo’, that has to be my favorite so far.
“You know,” I say as I pull a coffee cup down from the cupboard. “You should make your own dictionary, ‘the dictionary of Dante’.” I turn back to him and watch his face light up, his eyes taking on that sparkle that always happens when he has some sort of crazy idea.
“You know what.” He points at me. “That’s not such a bad idea.”
“Bro…” I snort. “I was-” I stop when I feel my cell vibrate in my pocket and pull it out, expecting to see Ryan’s name, the head of my security detail and my best friend.
My eyes widen when I see Jas’ name on the screen. For a second, I think my eyes are playing tricks on me, then my brain kicks into gear and I press the green button to answer the call before it goes to voicemail.
“Jas?” I ask when I put the cell to my ear. I see Dante’s brows fly up to his hairline out the corner of my eye and I mirror his expression.
Yeah, I’m just as shocked as he is. Jas hasn’t called me in years and I’ve always made sure I had the same number, hoping that one day she would call me.
“Jay?” she mumbles, her voice cracking. My free hand immediately forms into a fist and I’m on edge. I can’t stand to see or hear her upset and I know just from that one word that she needs me.
“Where are you?” I growl, grabbing my keys and wallet from the kitchen counter and walking to the door.
“I’m on campus, by the… the… statue.” I hear her quick intake of breath and my protective instincts kick in.
“I’ll be right there, baby. Don’t move.” I pull the door open, not bothering to close it as I jog to the elevator and punch the button.
“O… okay,” she whispers, right before the line goes dead.
I pocket my cell and look back at the apartment just in time to see Dante coming out. “No.” I shake my head and point at him as I step into the elevator. “You stay put. You’re not out of danger yet. I’ll be back in a bit.”
“But-” he says, stopping halfway to me.
“Stay. Put,” I growl right before the door closes. I open and close my fists and will the elevator to go faster. I need to get to Jas, and quick.
After I’d calmed down, I realized how upset I must have made Jas. My words were inexcusable but I’d had enough of her going on and on about Jay, moping about like a lost puppy. If she loved him so bad, why was she avoiding him? Why was she being such a loser? God, that makes me sound so fucking bad but I want the best for her. Jay is probably the one guy who could make her happy but she won’t give it a chance and that infuriates me. Especially when she knows how I feel about Dante, yet I can’t have him can I? No, he’ll forever be a fucking player and my heart will forever be destroyed. Much like I’m destroying the game.
For that matter, I haven’t heard or seen Dante in a while, even around campus. As I walk back to the dorm house, I keep my eyes peeled just in case I see him. So far, I haven’t and I’m nearly there now. I furrow my brows and a sinking feeling hits my gut. What if something has happened to him? Why, Callie, would something happen to Dante fucking Frazier? My mind screams at me. I shake off the thought. If something had indeed happened, I would have heard by now. The guy doesn’t have a private life on this campus.
Reaching my room, I’m hesitant to step inside. What if Jas is here? I don’t want to rehash the argument, hell, I don’t think I’m ready to speak to her, at least until she sorts her shit out. I huff out a breath and enter the dark room. The drapes are still closed from this morning but no Jas. I breathe a sigh of relief and drop my bag on the floor by the door. I don’t bother opening the curtains, I just drop onto my bed and close my eyes. I know I need to apologize for my shitty attitude to Jas but if I didn’t say anything, then someone else would.
A million thoughts of everything that’s happened over recent weeks flies through my mind and I can’t settle on just one. Jas, Dante, Jay and the game, fight to take place at the forefront but not one of them is winning… a bit like the game me and Dante have played for months; there’s no winner, just heartache.
I must have drifted off to sleep because the loud banging coming from the door wasn’t happening seconds ago. My eyes are glued shut from the sleepy dust and I wipe at them. I groan as another loud bang echoes through the room. I stand, stretch and stroll to the door and swing it open to come face to face with a rather red-faced, angry looking Jay.
He barges past me, knocking my shoulder along the way. “Do come in,” I grumble, rolling my eyes. “What do I owe this pleasure?”
“Cut the shit, Callie. What you said to Jasmine was unforgivable,” he growls, pointing a finger at my chest.
“Dude, if you wanted to touch my breasts, all you had to do was ask.” I smirk at him. He doesn’t intimidate me. No man can.
“Don’t fuck with me right now, Callie.” The look he gives me is menacing but it doesn’t faze me and I just raise a brow at him. “I’ve had her in the car crying. She told me what you said.”
“Well, obviously, she omitted a lot of it or you wouldn’t
be here screaming in my face like a three-year-old, would you?” The vein in his neck twitches but he remains mute. “I told her that if she was so in love with you then why would she keep pushing you away. In fact, I was trying to help her sort her shit out instead of hiding in here away from you at every opportunity. I’m not the bad guy here, it’s about time she heard a few home truths. She’s not a naïve girl anymore. She’s in love and I can see it’s tearing her apart but she’s not little miss innocent that she’s claiming to be. She was messing with my fucking feelings when it came to Dante, but she didn’t care because all she cared about was pissing you off. So, you can take your bad mouth, your hateful actions and shoulder barging business elsewhere. I have better stuff to do without you chewing me out for something that could have benefited you. I have my own feelings with Dante to battle with seeing as the fucker has disappeared off the face of the earth, but don’t mind me. You can see yourself out.” I can feel the fumes exiting my body, my flushed skin and erratic breathing show that. I swear I can feel steam come out of my ears.
I turn away, stalking back to my bed before breaking down into my pillow. Will this hurt inside of me ever stop? Will I ever stop hitting the self-destruct button and plague the people closest to me? I want to change but inside I’m shattering into a million pieces. Every little bit of silence breaks me that little bit more.
I stand here, eyes wide and jaw slacked at how Callie reacted. How Dante puts up with her is anybody’s guess. I’ve never met anyone so infuriating in my entire life and just as I’m about to give her a piece of my mind, to tell her that she’s acting like a petulant child, I hear her sobs and cringe.
What she said to Jas was unacceptable and she needed to realize that she couldn’t talk to her friends like that, but telling her that right now obviously isn’t going to help anything. Not only that but I can’t stand to see a woman cry.