At that moment she knew she never would want that jewelry or wear it. It was a certain knowledge that would permit no compromise.
“I also decided I didn’t want to own anything that would make me that unhappy if I lost it.” She paused and looked at him almost shyly before adding softly, “I think I’m taking a big enough risk loving you. If I ever lost you I—” Her voice caught.
Gregory reached over and covered her hand.
“Shhhh, everything will be all right. Everything will be just fine.” He kissed her and then grinned. He held up his finger with the ring. “I can’t think of anything nicer. I love it.” He kissed her again, ignoring the glances of the few other people at nearby tables.
After a moment of thinking, he wondered aloud, “Has your grandmother given you any of her jewelry?”
She grimaced and then laughed. “She’s given me several pieces, including my great-grandmother’s wedding ring, thinking I might use it next week. They’re all in a safe-deposit box at the bank.”
He nodded, impressed beyond measure by her integrity. How did he get so lucky, he wondered again. “What are you going to do with them?” It wouldn’t surprise him if she planned on selling them and giving the money to charity.
With a widening smile and mischief in her eyes, she looked up at him, loving the feel of his hands caressing hers. “Give them to my daughters one day.”
She watched as it took some moments before his smile started wavering as her words slowly were absorbed, and then his face went pale.
“Kellan?!” He jerked back, heart hammering, a swirl of confusing thoughts sweeping in waves as he suddenly realized they had never, ever talked about children. But he thought it was a foregone conclusion they couldn’t have any . . .
Then he saw the grin that widened into a smile as she reached up and tweaked his nose. “Just wanted to be sure you were paying attention,” she whispered before she kissed him.
Chapter Forty
The morning of the wedding came much too quickly for some and not quickly enough for the couple.
Elizabeth woke early, praying that the weather forecast had changed. Last night at midnight they were predicting rain showers at the time the wedding attendants would be stepping outside. The wedding would take place in the long side yard, the ground even and lush with manicured grass.
She smiled, happy that this day she would see her daughter marrying a good man. Then a slight frown puckered her forehead. She would also see Michael for the first time in . . . a very long while. He hadn’t been able to come last night to a simple meal for both families to meet. The wedding party was so small, the service so simple, it had seemed ludicrous to have a traditional rehearsal dinner. Kellan had called it a getting-to-know-you dinner. Elizabeth had enjoyed meeting Gregory’s mother, sister, her husband, and their new baby. Alex Jamison had been there with her parents and two of her younger brothers; the two older ones would also be attending the wedding today. Even Virginia Mae and Julia seemed to have a good time, after a slightly rocky start. Well, there was nothing she could do to fix that, Elizabeth told herself.
Michael had been out of town until late last night. He had promised to be here at least an hour before the wedding, which would start at 3:00 p.m.
Elizabeth had talked to him only briefly on the phone just once in the last month. She willed herself not to anticipate the worst.
God, let it be all right, let him be all right, and I’ll thank You now for fixing this for me, she prayed, trying to ignore the doubts, the feeling that this was going to be an impossible task.
She stopped and mentally shook herself, knowing that with God everything was possible—perhaps not obvious, but definitely possible. She reminded herself that it didn’t matter what she felt, because it was all faith—not feelings. She repeated that small phrase over and over again until, hopeful, she began to slowly get out of bed.
Virginia Mae had not slept well. Fretful thoughts kept churning over in her mind, pushing away sleep. These facts nagged throughout the night: that she had no say-so in the wedding planning; the wedding was actually taking place outside and without a doubt it would rain; she was miserable it had to be so far away when there was their own big beautiful church right in the city that could have suited everyone so very much better. Her teeth gritted as she remembered the tiny guest list on which, again, she had not been consulted—none of her friends, only immediate family. When she had been made aware of that decision she had just known they wouldn’t let her invite her own sister.
When she had called Elizabeth she was practically in tears. Elizabeth—who still insisted on an appointment before her own mother could visit her—told her right off that Carol and Gordon were coming, and of course Aunt Julia was expected. Would Virginia Mae care to ride with her sister? Arrangements had been made for them to stay at a local bed-and-breakfast nearby.
It didn’t completely appease her. Virginia Mae couldn’t help but remain sorely aggrieved over not being allowed a whisper of input into the most important day of her granddaughter’s life.
This morning it was safer to focus on all her disappointments because she couldn’t, wouldn’t, think about Elizabeth.
Shudders ran through her. What she had seen last night nearly drove her to collapse in tears, but everyone else seemed so casual, so unconcerned . . . no, she wouldn’t go there. Virginia Mae wondered, not for the first time, if there wasn’t a conspiracy to drive her stark-raving mad.
She added to the list and her mouth flattened as more angry thoughts unfolded. Who was Gregory Jamison? She didn’t like it at all that Kellan had known this boy for such a short time and now was going to enter into a legal arrangement. The whole thing was ludicrous and headed for disaster, but again, no one seemed the slightest bit interested in what she thought.
She felt a dull throb at her temples and told herself she had to relax. It didn’t help that the mattress she was resting on had as many lumps as bad gravy. She sighed deeply. Her life was as sad as it ever had been. Nonetheless, she tried to relax.
It seemed mere seconds later, though the clock said two hours, when Julia banged at her door. “I want to go to breakfast at that little restaurant down the street,” her sister trilled, the steady knocking uncannily matching the pulse hammering in Virginia Mae’s temples. Virginia Mae groaned and wondered what she had ever done to deserve this. “Oh, all right, Julia, stop it. I’m getting up. At least let me get dressed, won’t you?”
Virginia Mae frowned darkly as Julia gave her a time limit of ten minutes; this day was beginning rotten and probably would get no better.
Gordon woke oddly restless. Was it because he was sleeping in a new place, this bed-and-breakfast Elizabeth had found for him and Carol to use for the weekend?
Or was it because Carol was sleeping right down the hall from him, in this devastatingly romantic place? The house seemed to have been built for lovers, or at least renovated for current ones. He had a Jacuzzi in his bathroom that would easily accommodate another couple of people. Or at least one.
As emotions swept through him he hadn’t felt in years, the scientist in him tried to analyze them.
When he and Carol had arrived last night, it was more than a mere social occasion. It was to meet the family Kellan was going to become a part of this day.
As stupid as it sounded, magic was in the air. All you had to do was look at the wedding couple to believe true love was possible. They were young and earnest and caring, and he was impressed with how attentive they were to each other, how gracious they were together and to everyone else. Love. It was as tangible as the shrimp and oysters they ate last night and lingered with a perfume all its own. He couldn’t stay in bed after he woke up.
Consequently, after he showered and dressed, he went knocking on Carol’s door, because he wanted his best friend to journey out with him.
Surprisingly, the owner was already in the kitchen with coffee brewing and making breakfast to tempt any hungry soul to sin.
By
eight, well-fed and content, they were out on the streets of the town, walking until they darted off the main street and began strolling on a deserted beach. It was sandy and private, because the people who owned it were either not up or absent landowners. Public beaches were not unheard of in this county, but extremely rare and hard to find.
Finally, they stood just where Cockrell Creek started joining other creeks and rivers heading toward the Chesapeake Bay; this was where the point of land known as Reedville ended.
Its heyday was the early 1900s. Then it boasted the highest per capita income in the nation, thanks to the booming fishing industry and the ship captains who called this place home. These wealthy men built opulent homes for their women, gingerbread Victorians and one-of-a-kind masterpieces. Over the many seasons of economic downturn, many had fallen into disrepair.
In the last several years, wealthy northern Virginia couples seeking an escape to a slower, more genteel way of life had discovered the place. Many of these old homes had been bought, upgraded, and either made into bed-and-breakfasts or kept as private homes.
As they walked around the town, Carol thought wistfully that this was a romantic place to be. She wondered about all those who had lived, prospered, and died right here by the river. The changes over the last hundred years had been immense. Wealth to genteel poverty to a resurrection for some.
Since last night, when they left the city and came here, her soul had been invaded by a sense of leisure. On one level, she felt like she was on college break, with no responsibilities.
“Gordon, does Michael know?” Carol finally asked, her hands shoved into the pockets of a lightweight summer jacket.
“Considering the fact we didn’t know until last night, my guess is no.” And he wasn’t quite sure what to do. He wasn’t Elizabeth’s doctor, but yesterday she had offered few words of explanation.
“It’s just a very small problem,” she had assured him with a jaunty smile as she pulled herself up, firmly holding on to a streamlined black shiny walker.
“I can walk, but the balance has gotten . . . a bit problematic over these last weeks. Soooo,” she breathed dramatically, “this is helping to keep me straight.” She looked demur and winked. “You might say I’m gravity-challenged—temporarily, of course.” Her humor and ease had dimmed the awful shock he had felt at first.
Carol had also been wide-eyed. Concern roared through her, as she wondered what had happened to her cousin, all of it making her feel a little faint.
“Elizabeth, are you sure you’re up for all this?” She couldn’t believe there would actually be a wedding here tomorrow, not when Elizabeth seemed to be having so much trouble. But she looked absolutely stunning. Her face was shining and even if her body seemed in distress, you would never know it by the way she looked.
“I’m fine.” Elizabeth’s smile declared total conviction. And she stood up and took several firm steps just to show them. She ignored their initial reaction with a deft ease that was intriguing.
For her part, Elizabeth was deeply gratified that by the time Virginia Mae arrived with Aunt Julia, all the other guests showed such a casual acceptance that it seemed to deflate the shock in those two old pairs of eyes. She wished people could just look at her and see nothing else. It would make life so much nicer.
“Should we call and tell him?” Carol was startled to realize she was actually nervous for Michael. She had not really thought too much about it, but the fact that he had been part of Elizabeth’s life forever made it seem odd he was never around now. And he was seeing that therapist, which seemed a positive thing. How would it affect him to see his Elizabeth using something that usually only old men and women used because—well, because they were old? She felt her eyes begin to mist. Elizabeth was not old, she had done nothing to deserve any of this, and here she was laughing and being charming and making them all feel better. Carol shook her head. Elizabeth looked genuinely and vividly happy.
“Gordon.” She waited for him to turn.
“Yes?” He sounded distracted.
“Is it truly possible Elizabeth can really . . . be as happy as she seems, even though this new thing has happened? Or is she putting on a good face?” It seemed too incongruous. Yet her cousin certainly was playing her part like a trouper if that was the case.
“Yes.” There it was, that certainty, as if he knew something she didn’t.
“How can you be so sure?” She suspected he was just saying this to stem any more conversation about Elizabeth, that he really didn’t know anything. He surprised her.
“Because I’ve seen patients who have had this same kind of . . . I don’t know, I think of it as a spiritual leap, going from the stress of illness and uncertainties to a . . . an understanding that provides peace—after they’ve accepted what they can’t change. Truly accepted.”
Her nose wrinkled. “Accepted? You mean giving up?”
He shook his head; his eyes were cast toward the river, mesmerized by the sparkling diamonds the light from the sun created on its surface. “No, it’s not giving up. Giving up is the last resort, when you have no more choices left. I’ve known people in unrelenting pain who have no other option and they give up and die. What I mean by accepting is you’re choosing to hurdle across to a place where it can’t touch or hurt anymore. One of my patients, an older woman who lives with a variety of problems, once described it as being on the other side of a broken heart. I don’t know if I can explain, but she said it’s where you choose to put what you can’t change into the smallest part of you, so you can get on with the rest of your life—where you can still have a life.”
She, too, was watching the constant shifts of the water, squinting to see the outlines of a lighthouse in the far distance. The constancy of the water was almost hypnotic, and Carol could barely hold on to what Gordon just said.
It didn’t make a lot of sense on the surface, but what did she know? The only really sick person she knew well was Elizabeth, and she didn’t understand her at all anymore.
But she still loved her. She hoped that might count for something. She blinked. “Let’s go get some more coffee.” She pulled him toward the road and within minutes they were inside a small café, ordering homemade bread and coffee.
“How about that lovely card from Serenity and Mehalia?” Carol asked.
Gordon sipped the steaming liquid. “Big surprise. Especially the check for fifteen hundred dollars.”
“Yeah, I know. I think it was a . . . thoughtful thing for her to do.” Carol sounded distracted. The thought of Michael still jabbed, but at least there they could do something practical.
“Shouldn’t we call Michael and make sure he doesn’t walk in and get knocked for a loop like we were last night?” It was nagging her, feeling like a scrape that needed attention.
“I don’t know,” Gordon answered truthfully. Would it be better to let Michael be as blindsided as they had been, or would it be better for him to have some warning?
Put that way, he knew which choice he’d prefer and he was glad it made everything simple. “I’ll go call him.”
Carol drained her cup and looked around for the waitress, wanting a refill. She was going to need to be fortified to get through this day with all its changes, where everything was different and wonderful and awful all at the same time.
If it hadn’t been so early in the day, she might have asked for the coffee to be laced with something stronger.
She finally caught the waitress’s eye and held up her cup. Maybe things would be better, after all. She watched Gordon walk back, frowning.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. He didn’t answer . . . which means he may be on his way here, or still sleeping or at his office. I don’t know, but I’m going to hang around in front of their house and try to catch him as soon as he pulls up.”
Carol nodded. “I think that’s a good plan. I’ll help.”
As they pulled up to the house, they discovered they were too late. Michael was alrea
dy there. They could see him and Elizabeth standing at the patio. It was close to where the wedding would take place hours from now. An archway decorated with flowers and ribbons was where Kellan and Gregory would stand at 3:00 p.m. and promise their lives to each other. They were not too far away to hear everything but too uncertain to move any closer.
Michael was tired but had been too excited to stay in Richmond that morning. He had left brimming with hope and anticipation. His baby was getting married today, he would see his wife, and he would do his level best to romance her back into his life. He had it all planned. After Kellan and Gregory left, he would suggest Elizabeth leave with him for what would be a romantic dinner on the water.
He would make her feel pretty, desired and adored. The thoughts of what he would do kept a grin on his face as he drove the car over Downings Bridge, anticipating the whole day with relish.
The sessions with the therapist had made him realize how poorly he had handled the whole thing. He had let fear and anger wrap him up so tight, he had forgotten the one indisputable and most important fact when it came to his wife.
He loved her. Even if he couldn’t fix her body, she was still the woman he loved. The changes didn’t make a difference to his heart.
After he parked the car and got out, he was practically floating as he went through the front door and moved to the back room facing the river. He saw her standing with her back to him out on the patio and then she was walking toward the arch. He immediately headed there.
She was alone. It couldn’t be a more perfect setting for their first meeting in months. She would see he was a new man, he had changed, and soon everything would be patched up between them and their lives would be better than ever because they would be together. All these thoughts were racing around in his head; his emotions were on fire for this moment to be memorable.
A Sundog Moment Page 40