He tried to punch me but I managed to dodge “This is my apprentice Jules” I waved to my friend.
“Nice tits, give us a hug sweetie” he stepped forward and Jules hid behind me.
“Awe, she’s shy” he said grinning broadly.
“Listen you old reprobate, stop trying to maul my girlfriend or I’ll tell your missus”
He looked over his shoulder a bit worried, “Do you want me dead you bastard?” I could see he was concerned “what happened to that panther you were fuckin’, I thought you liked her?”
“A man can have more than one girl you know, if your wife wasn’t a murderous old cow you could try it”
“Never happen, what do you need today?” he asked.
“My apprentice needs a long gun, I’m thinking a 308 chambered for supersonic with a built in suppressor and flash arrestor, she’ll need both night and day scopes of course”
“Couldn’t be easier, when do you need it?”
“Thursday” I said.
“For fuck sake you dodgy bastard, give me some fucking time won’t you” he complained.
‘Sorry dude, we’ve got an important job for the council, I could use the backup” I said with a shrug.
“Ahh you must have got that job to kill the king” he said with a smile.
“How the fuck do you know about that? It’s supposed to be top secret” I screamed at him.
“The missus plays bridge with some of the councils wives, they gossip like, well like women” he grinned happily.
“Please keep this under your hat dude, shit like this could get me killed” I said with a loud sigh.
“My wife’s the gossip not me, bring your girl over to the laser and we’ll measure her up” he gestured to an area to the side. Jules went over and stood on the X he’d marked on the ground, the laser fired up and scanned her whole body quickly feeding her measurements into a computer. “Ok now put your hands behind your back and stand up straight” he was picking up a digital camera.
“Erm, why?” she asked as she assumed the position.
He took a couple of photos, “It makes your tits stand out better” he took some more pics as Jules wrapped her arms around her chest and scowled at the little pervert.
“We done, you horrible little man?” I asked while laughing my arse off.
“I have something I think you’ll be interested in, come over to the range” he was smiling like kid with a step mom with really shitty morals.
At the range he handed me a large hand cannon “Jesus dude what is this thing?”
I turned it over in my hands, it had the magazine set in front of the trigger guard it was fucking huge “What calibre is this?” I asked a little worried about the answer.
“It’s a fifty cal but the bullets are the same as the vehicle mounted machine guns the army use” he smiled at me.
“Fuck off you short idiot, Sylvia Baloney couldn’t fire this without breaking his wrist” I said.
“Ah, there you are wrong, this bulge at the back” he pointed behind the chamber which was well forward of normal due to the location of the magazine “This is the recoilless mechanism” he said proudly.
“Fuck off , you’ve built a hand gun sized recoil absorber?” this was fucking huge.
“Yep, there is still a bit of a recoil but nothing a big fucker like you can’t handle” I gave him a bit of stink eye then checked the load and pointed it down range.
He was right the recoil was no worse than my 22 “How much?” I asked a bit suspicious of the answer.
He quoted a price that most people associated with new family cars “Shit dude, that better include a laser sight and a shoulder holster”
Yes it was a lot of cash but the chance to own a unique weapon like this that could kill people inside armoured limos was something I couldn’t resist.
He grabbed his tools and started screwing on a laser sight then handed me a large holster I took off my jacket and strapped it on, I slipped my new weapon into the holster and donned my jacket “Shit I’m gonna need to go see my tailor” there was a large bulge under my arm.
“Not my problem, come back around lunch on Thursday to collect the girlies gun” he said. “that do ya?”
“Awesome, you’re the best even if you are a massive perv” we shook hands and Jules and I left.
“Well that was a bit unnerving, where to now?” she asked.
“I warned ya, now we need to see Joshua, my main contact, he’ll set up your account and encrypted e-mail, so you can go shopping for lingerie”
“Great two massive pervs, what’s Joshua like? I hope he’s normal” she said cautiously.
“He’s a sweet heart, you’ll like him, he looks after Sam when I go away on holidays or work” I said.
“That’s a relief” she said.
Josh was waiting at the door as usual when we parked in the drive I led Jules over and introduced her “Pleased to meet you dear, I suppose you’ll be needing a new laptop with the works” he said.
“Absolutely, and a cup of coffee” I said.
Josh handed us each a mug as we sat down, I watched Jules expectantly. She took a sip and immediately gagged and started looking around for somewhere to spit out the drink. She rushed over to the sink and gacked out her coffee, she looked a little red when she came back and sat down pushing her mug aside.
“Pussy” I said smiling happily.
She stuck out her tongue and flipped me the bird, meanwhile Joshua was already typing away on a new laptop. He turned the laptop toward Jules “Type in a password, make sure it’s one you won’t forget” he said.
Jules quickly typed in her password, from the smile I was guessing it was something dirty.
Josh continued typing, then turned the laptop towards Jules again “Ok this password is for your offshore account, make it different from the first but equally memorable” once she had done that he continued typing “She looked at me “I’ve always wanted an offshore account like in the movies” she said smiling happily.
“Ok last one is for your encrypted e-mail” he turned it towards Jules once more. Once that was done he typed for a few minutes more, when he finished he pushed the laptop over to Jules.
“Here you go pretty lady, your link to the real world, I’ve added addresses for important people you’ll need such as Bill’s armourer his doctor and the council” he pushed his own laptop over to me “You can use mine to transfer funds to Jules account, I have her details in the payees section already”
I quickly transferred two hundred thousand beer coupons to Jules account, Jules was watching hers eagerly waiting. She started bouncing up and down in her chair so I guessed the money had arrived.
“Oh my god, oh my god oh my god, what should I buy first?”
“Don’t forget those sexy undies” I said smiling happy to see my girl so excited, but then all chicks like money, especially if there screwing it out of some guy “You might consider buying a nicer car, that old bronco of yours is looking a little ragged”
“Ooh great idea, those muscle cars of yours are ok, but there really boy’s toys, I want a Porsche 911 convertible” she said really excited now.
“It’ll take over half your money, but you can’t afford a new lambo or Ferrari so whatever” I said as she came over for a hug “but be warned if you buy a dog dick pink one you’ll be parking it outside” I kept an eye on luxury car prices and knew this one would cost around a hundred and twenty grand.
She hugged me again “Erm how do I access my money” she asked Josh.
“Bill will take you to the bank in the morning to pick up your debit card” he replied. “they’ll be waiting for you I’ve sent them an e-mail to have everything ready for you” he said.
“Why a debit card not a credit card?” she asked.
“The debit card is limited only by how much
you have in your account, an unlimited credit card is just asking for trouble, trust me you do not want to meet this banks debt collectors” he smiled at Jules.
I spoke up “This bank is run by the supernatural community, they have a metric shit ton of money but very few morals or scruple’s”
“Wow I can’t wait, can we go to the Porsche dealers after the bank?” she asked.
“Of course baby, whatever you want” I said as I felt her up and she squirmed in my lap.
I decided we should get home soon as I had a major boner that needed attention and she seemed in a receptive mood.
We shook Josh’s hand and headed for the door “Oh Bill, the council contacted me earlier, their paying a cool million for that regicide job” holy shit, I guess they really want the old cunt dead.
“Another two hundred grand for you babe” I said as she squealed happily.
I was thinking about Jules old Bronco, it would make a good invisible car for her once I’d fixed up the running gear. I’d keep that as a surprise for the next time I wanted a blow job.
“Show me that new gun of yours” she said as she felt around inside my jacket, I tried slapping her hand away but she managed to sneak my gun out and start fiddling with it.
“For fuck sake be careful with that, you can shoot down small aircraft with that thing” I shouted at her “imagine what it would do to my car”
“Don’t worry I’m a professional” she pointed it out the window at an old couple.
We arrived home rather quickly as my boner was in charge of the throttle, as soon as I shutoff the engine I had her pressed against my workbench and was balls deep in heaven. We fucked all the way down to the bedroom where we finally collapsed into bed.
Roxy came home and managed to fuck Jules while barely waking me up, we went up for a quick dinner of leftover Chinese then back to bed and sleep.
Chapter Fifteen
Wednesday
After our usual long shower in the morning we had a big breakfast of pancakes then I helped Jules into my 69 COPO Camaro and we were off to the bank. Jules looked around in wonder as soon as we stepped inside.
There was no long counter full of bored clerks just a series of desks spread out in a large space with crystal chandeliers all over the roof and soft classical music playing in the background.
We were met at the door by an obsequious flunky who led us to a vacant desk with a young shifter who had Jules documents all ready for signing. I hadn’t had a chance to set up any fake ID’s for her yet but this wasn’t a problem as the bank insisted on true identities for all accounts. It was a bad idea to try and fool them.
The flunky offered us a coffee, Jules asked for a double shot mocha I demanded a whiskey, he quickly returned with her coffee and my snort while the shifter scanned her palm print and took a retinal scan as well in case she wanted a safety deposit box in the future. I had one stuffed with emergency cash and passports of course.
We climbed into the car once we were done and she sat there fondling her new card “I can’t wait to spend some of this” she said looking at me wide eyed.
“Well I guess we had best get to the Porsche dealers then” as I took off with a shriek of rubber.
On the way I told her to meet me at Barclays after she had finished at the dealers, Barclays was a high end restaurant that was famous for serving man sized meals rather than those gay arsed artistic portions that most modern restaurants considered a meal.
As soon as I stopped in the dealers parking area she was off like a shot with her new card clutched in her hand.
She screamed out of the yard ten minutes later in a silver convertible with the salesman white knuckling in the passenger seat. He must be new as I would expect the old hands to be used to the enthusiasm of their customers.
While she was busy I went over to the scene of tomorrow’s crime to scout out and make plans. There was an apartment building opposite the recital hall, I went straight over to look for a place to hole up after the hit. The vamps would be out for blood quite literally after the king dropped so we’d need somewhere to hide after we took the shots.
The top floor had three apartments for rent as this was the least popular floor because the elevator had an iffy history. I found this out by talking to some of the current residents.
It didn’t take long to acquire the keys for the three top floor apartments from the manager, I chose the one opposite the stairs and slipped quietly inside. The apartment was fully furnished with bedding and kitchen gear. I tested the microwave with a glass of water and that the fridge was working, once I was satisfied I called a local Chinese restaurant and ordered a shitload of takeaway and bottles of soda.
While I was waiting for the food I tested the bed which was surprising comfy then had a shit. After the food had arrived and was safely stored in the fridge. I went down to the managers to sign the papers and present my fake ID to secure the apartment for a month.
I told him some bullshit about needing somewhere quiet to finish my current novel, he seemed supremely indifferent to my story. As soon as I was done I headed to the restaurant, I hadn’t bothered to book a table but I was a frequent flyer here and tended to tip very well so was soon seated at a quiet table in back.
Jules rolled in ten minutes later with that windblown look that jetsetters tended to adopt.
She sat own in my lap and was getting very friendly till the waiter came over and harrumphed behind us. “I am so fucking happy right now” she squealed happily.
“I can tell” I reached over and tweaked one of her rock hard nipples.
She slapped my hand away while looking at the waiter embarrassedly “Later you perv” we ordered a slap up meal and sat back to discuss tomorrows job.
After lunch we raced each other to the zoo and parked next to each other. I armed my alarm hopeful they would be more interested in a muscle car than Jules new Porsche.
We spent the rest of the day wandering around the zoo, they’d made some improvements since my last visit and the critters looked a lot more comfortable in their new habitats.
We raced each other home, Jules was obviously very happy with her new car especially when I let squeak ahead towards the end. Roxy came home a little while later after finishing her last clients of the day and we sat down to a family meal then bed for fun and fuckin’.
Chapter Sixteen
Thursday
After breakfast I pulled a case of beer from the fridge and a coffee maker with some coffee and a jug of milk and some sugar. I put everything in a bag and we drove over to the new apartment to load up the fridge and dump the coffee machine in the kitchen.
I set up some cameras on the roof facing the door of the recital hall and we fucked off to Wilhelm’s to collect her rifle, I let her pay Wilhelm for the rifle and we headed home to sight it in and make sure she was comfortable with her new gun.
After she had fired off a box of standard rounds I took her up to the armoury to show her how to make explosive bullets. She was fascinated by the process and was soon making her own rounds smiling happily to herself while I fucked off to the gym to shed some weight.
I had a swim in the pool afterwards and went back to the armoury to check up on Jules. By the time I arrived she had a box of bullets and was sitting there quite happy with her efforts “Can we try these out before tonight? I want to make sure they work” she asked.
“Come along then” I led her down to the range, I had already set up a bunch of water melon’s with fangs drawn on them about a hundred yards out which was the same as the roof height of the apartment building. We lay down, me with the scope she with her new rifle. “Whenever you’re ready honey” I said “Shoot the paper targets first so we can set the sights”
She took aim and was as close as fuck is to swearing Wilhelm had a definite knack with firearms. Adjust down a fraction, she made the adjustment then hit the bull d
ead on, “Good enough for government work” I said. “now hit the . . . “ she was already exploding melons and laughing loudly.
Once she had run through a magazine I took her back to the armoury and showed her how to strip and clean her weapon. She finished that in no time and stood proudly with her weapon held in front of her, “Take a picture please” she fluttered her lashes at me.
“Ok, but for fuck sake do not under any circumstance share this on social media, in fact to be safe you should shut down any social media you currently have. From now on you need to be a ghost, understand?”
She pouted a little but finally saw the sense in what I’d said “Ok I’ll do it now” she said with a sigh. Personally I’d never understood people’s addiction to that shit, why would anyone need to know the colour of my last shit I’ll never understand.
We went up to the kitchen for a quick feed of leftover pizza and a coffee, then I stuffed a bag of weed into my pocket with some papers and we headed to the garage with our weapons.
At the site I kicked some cans over in front of the building and we went up to the roof to get set up. I set an electronics box on the roof between us and turned it on “What’s this?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.
“This my young apprentice is a white noise generator, vampires have scary good senses, hopefully this will hide our heartbeats and breathing at least long enough to do the deed” I replied while checking my camera feeds. “ok, baby get your gun ready, we need to sight it in again”
“I thought we did that twice already” she asked, clearly confused. But she was assembling her gun from the compact hard bag Wilhelm had supplied it in.
I was doing the same “New lesson, trajectories change depending on the angle of attack, a downward shot means you need to check your height adjustment, the drop will be greater so you will need to adjust upwards a little”
Once she was ready I told her to shoot at one of the cans I had left in front of the building. She had adjusted the scope but was still a quarter inch low, she made another adjustment and hit it dead centre, I did the same and we sat back against the low wall to wait for the king. Tonight was going to one of those times it was not good to be the king.
Assasins Code Page 7