by Sandy Taylor
We were standing in the front garden, looking up at it.
‘My own front door, Nell,’ sighed Mum. ‘Did you ever see anything so lovely?’
‘It’s the most beautiful front door in the whole entire world,’ said Olive.
‘It is, isn’t it?’ said Mum. ‘And there’s a garden at the back as well, so your dad will be kept busy, and if that’s not enough, we have our own shed. Can you imagine that? Our very own shed.’
Mum looked so happy I had a lump in my throat. She deserved a nice front door and a back garden and a shed. ‘Oh, Mum, I’m so happy for you,’ I said, hugging her.
‘Now, do you want to see the rest of the house?’
‘Of course we do,’ said Olive, running round the side.
The house was much bigger than the flat in Rannly Court. It had a lovely kitchen with a table and chairs where you could eat your food. There was a bathroom off the side with a proper bath. When we’d lived in Rannly Court we had to fill a tin tub with water every Friday night and take turns washing ourselves. If you were last in the tub, the water would be stone cold.
Olive raced upstairs and I followed. As I admired the three lovely bedrooms I had the strangest feeling that I’d been here before. It was only when I went back downstairs and into the front room that I saw the sofa and I realised why: all the furniture had come from Sea View. I was guessing that Miss Timony had refurbished the guest house so that Mum and Dad could have the old furniture. How kind people had been to us on this journey of ours.
I’d hated the war, I’d hated leaving Mum and losing our home, but I’d also gained something that might never have happened if I’d stayed in Bermondsey.
I was more confident, I had a job in a lovely hotel and I didn’t feel out of place; I was as good as the next girl that worked there. If I’d stayed at home I would have ended up in the sugar factory or the custard factory. I would probably have been happy enough, but now I knew there were better things out there for me and I could do anything I wanted to do. I wondered if leaving Bermondsey had changed Angela as well. I would love to see her again, to sit down and talk to her, to hear her story. We weren’t thirteen anymore; we would both have changed but not in the ways that mattered. We came from the same place and Bermondsey would always be a part of us, but one thing I had learned was that it wasn’t the whole of us.
We stayed at the house all afternoon. I left Olive playing with Freddie and went out into the back garden, where Dad was digging up the earth for a vegetable patch.
‘Do you think you’ll be happy here, Dad?’ I said.
He stopped digging and leaned on the shovel. ‘I wouldn’t care where I was as long as you were all safe. There were times, Nell, when I didn’t think I would ever see you again. So yes, I can be happy here.’
Nobody had told me what had happened to Dad and why he had been in hospital. ‘Were you wounded, Dad?’ I asked.
‘I nearly drowned. I don’t know how long I was in the water before I was picked up. I got pneumonia, Nell, and it’s left me with a weakness.’
‘Oh, Dad, I’m really sorry.’
‘Don’t be sorry, love, I was one of the lucky ones. A lot of my friends weren’t as lucky as me.’
Just then Tony called to me.
‘Tea and cake, anyone?’
‘I can’t believe the change in Tony.’
‘Oh, he’s a dab hand at the old cake baking; I’m going to get fat at this rate.’
I kissed his cheek. It felt rough to my lips. I loved him so much, it was hard to believe that he had come safely home to us. I had so much to be thankful for. ‘You could do with getting fat,’ I told him.
* * *
‘You really can cook,’ I said, helping myself to another slice of Tony’s fruit cake.
‘Did you doubt me?’
‘It’s just that when we were kids all you ever wanted to do was mess around in the river, skipping school and making Mum worry herself silly.’
‘What else was there to do round there?’ said Tony.
‘I suppose there wasn’t that much, was there? But it was home and it was all we knew.’
‘I still think about the river – that’s where I was the most happy. I thought it was the best place on earth.’
‘But now you’re not so sure?’
‘Now I know there’s more.’
So I wasn’t the only one who had been changed by the war.
‘I’m going to have to look for a job to help Mum out. Is there anything going at that hotel of yours?’
‘I’ll ask Mr Costos, and if he hasn’t got a vacancy he might know of another hotel that has. But wouldn’t it be easier to try the hotels in Brighton and Hove?’
‘I don’t mind where I work as long as I can learn to become a proper chef. I want to open my own restaurant one day, Nell.’
I looked at my brother, so tall and grown-up, and I remembered the skinny kid with the muddy knees and the holes in his jumper. ‘I’m so proud of you, Tony,’ I said.
‘So when are you going to tell me what really happened at that farm?’
‘What makes you think anything happened?’
‘Because I know you wouldn’t have dragged Olive halfway across the country without a very good reason. Am I right?’
I nodded.
‘So?’
‘Maybe one day,’ I said.
I put my arms around him and laid my head on his shoulder. It felt good to be in his arms; I felt safe.
He held me away from him and said, ‘You can tell me anything, Nell, you know that.’
‘I know,’ I said, ‘and maybe one day I will.’
We kissed Mum goodbye. I could tell that it was hard for her to see us leave; it wasn’t what she had hoped for when she found us.
‘We’ll be back soon,’ I said.
‘If I come to live here can I have a cat?’ asked Olive suddenly.
Mum smiled. ‘You can have any old thing you like,’ she said.
‘A pig?’
‘I’d rather we stuck with the cat,’ said Mum.
‘Perhaps I could call it Pig.’
Mum smiled at me and shook her head. ‘She hasn’t changed a bit, has she?’
‘Not a bit,’ I said
We waved goodbye to them until we turned the bend in the street and they were out of sight. It was a fine day as Olive and I walked back home along the seafront. We’d decided to walk as far as Brighton, then get a bus home from there.
‘What did you think of the new house?’ I asked.
‘I thought it was really nice.’
‘Do you think you might like to live there one day?’
‘Maybe one day, but not yet. It might help if I had a cat called Pig. I’ll ask Auntie Missus what she thinks.’
‘You do that.’
It was lovely walking along the seafront with Olive; even the ugly barbed wire didn’t spoil it. I loved living by the sea. I used to pretend that the Thames was my very own ocean but that was before I saw what a real ocean looked like. I supposed this was going to be our home now that Mum and Dad had been given a house here and I didn’t really mind.
I stopped outside the tall white house on Kingsway. ‘This is where Lottie lives, Olive,’ I said.
Olive looked up at the four storeys. ‘All of it?’
‘That’s what I said when I first saw it.’
‘Bloody hell, she must be really rich, Nell! Poor people don’t live in houses like this.’
‘I thought that as well.’
‘She’s not a bit snobby though, is she? I think she’s really nice and it’s not her fault that she’s stinking rich.’
‘No, it’s not,’ I said, grinning.
‘I guess if we moved into the new house you could be close to Lottie. Would you like that, Nell?’
‘Very much.’
‘Do you think that Aggie will come and live here with me?’
‘Perhaps when she’s older. I don’t think her parents would let her leave home at nine years ol
d, do you?’
‘Well, I don’t fancy living in Coventry, Nell. I don’t like the sound of Coventry. I’d rather live here by the sea and I think Aggie would too.’
‘You’ve never even been to Coventry – how can you decide you don’t like it?’
‘It’s just a feeling, Nell.’ She put her hand on her heart. ‘In here,’ she added.
Then she put on her grown-up, serious face and shook her head as if she had the weight of the world on her little shoulders. ‘And there’s still Henry to worry about, Nell. I think he’d fall apart without me.’
Mum was right: Olive hadn’t changed one little bit.
Chapter Forty-Four
One morning Olive and I went down to the kitchen to find Mrs Wright and Mrs Baxter frying eggs and bacon with tears rolling down their cheeks.
‘What’s happened?’ I asked, alarmed to see them both so upset.
‘Berlin has fallen, Nell, and Hitler is dead – isn’t it wonderful?’
‘So why are you crying? That’s good news, isn’t it?’
‘Not for Hitler, it’s not,’ said Olive, plonking herself down at the table.
‘He was a bad man, Olive, he started the war,’ said Mrs Baxter.
‘Does that mean it’s over then?’ she asked.
‘Does it?’ I said to Mrs Baxter.
‘Well, it’s not official, Nell, but Mrs Wright and I are quietly optimistic.’
I walked over and gave them both a hug. ‘This is a wonderful day, a really wonderful day.’ And then I found myself crying as well.
‘Bloody hell,’ said Olive. ‘I’d hate to see you lot when you get bad news!’
The tea rooms were buzzing with talk of peace; everyone had an opinion on when the war would finally end. The doom-mongers were predicting that it could drag on for years but the rest were full of excitement and hope.
Mr Philip was the most excited. He twirled round the tables even though there were customers in, but everyone was in such high spirits that nobody took any notice.
‘Be careful, Philip,’ said Mr Costos, smiling. ‘We don’t want you injuring yourself before the big day.’
‘I can’t help it, Gino, my heart is dancing out of my chest. No more ghastly air-raid sirens, no more blackouts and oh, Gino, we will be able to swim in the sea again.’
‘If we can remember how,’ said Mr Costos, smiling fondly at him.
Jean and I were leaning against the counter, listening to them.
‘Do you know what?’ said Jean. ‘I don’t think Mr Costos needs a wife.’
‘I’ve been thinking that for a while,’ I said.
‘Funny old life, isn’t it?’
‘I suppose it is. If this really is the end of the war, when do you think Eric will come home?’
‘That’s all I think about, Nell. He said in his last letter that he’ll be back as soon as he can but he has no idea when that might be. Oh, Nell, I can’t wait to see him.’
‘Have you decided where you want to live?’
‘I’m happy to visit Canada and meet Eric’s family but I can’t imagine living so far away from home. Is that selfish of me, Nell?’
‘Eric said he didn’t mind where he lived so I shouldn’t worry about it.’
‘But I shouldn’t mind where we live, should I? As long as we’re together?’
‘You read too many romantic novels, my friend. I’m not sure real life is that simple.’
‘You sound very worldly wise all of a sudden, Nell. Is it because of what Robert did?’
‘Not especially. I think maybe the last few years have made me see people in a different light, that’s all.’
Just then Mr Philip came across to us. ‘Gino says we can hang the Union Jack out of the top window. I think I’m about to burst with excitement.’
We grinned at him. ‘We’ll help you when the tea rooms close,’ I said.
‘You darlings! Now, I have to go before I get emotional and Gino gets cross with me.’
The rest of the afternoon was fun; it didn’t feel like work. It felt like the week before Christmas when you could hardly wait for the actual day to come.
After much giggling and some pretty dangerous manoeuvres, we helped Mr Philip hang the Union Jack out the window and then I rushed home. It had been announced on the wireless that at seven o’clock there was to be an announcement from Mr Churchill, but when I ran in the door, Mrs Wright said that she’d heard on the Forces Programme that he probably wouldn’t speak until the next morning. Unconfirmed reports were coming in that Germany had surrendered. We had been half-expecting it but to actually hear the news was overwhelming.
‘Quick, we have to get the flag out,’ said Mrs Baxter.
‘I think maybe a moment’s silence first,’ said Mrs Wright. ‘For all those poor souls that didn’t live to witness this day.’
‘Wait,’ said Olive. ‘Auntie Missus lived through it as well, I have to get her.’
‘You’re right, Olive, she did,’ agreed Mrs Baxter, smiling at her.
We waited while Olive raced up the stairs and came back with her doll, then we stood in silence, each with our own thoughts. I said a prayer for Jimmy that he was safe and well and that somehow I would see him again, and then I said a prayer for Albert, who I was beginning to regret bashing over the head quite so hard. I hoped he was now a nicer person than he had been when he was alive.
* * *
We had to wait until the next day to be told there was victory in Europe but already the people of Eastbourne were celebrating. There were Union Jacks everywhere. People were dragging chairs and tables into the streets for impromptu parties; it felt as though the whole of Eastbourne was having one big celebration.
Mum, Dad, Freddie and Tony came to Sea View to share in the fun. It was lovely to all be together on this very special day.
‘I think we should take Mr Baxter’s wooden leg with us,’ said Olive. ‘After all, it’s got as much right to join in the celebrations as we have.’
‘What a lovely idea, Olive,’ said Mrs Baxter, smiling at her. ‘It will be like a part of Mr Baxter is with us. I’ll go and get it.’
We walked down to the seafront and joined a crowd of people around the bandstand. Someone had produced a barrel organ and people were singing and doing the conga up and down the prom.
At the end of the afternoon Freddie was getting tired, so Mum and Dad got ready to go back home. As they were leaving, Olive decided she wanted to go with them. I could see by the look on Mum’s face how happy it made her.
‘It’s just for one night, Mummy,’ said Olive. ‘I have to give Henry time to get his head round it.’
At six o’clock Jean came round. ‘Let’s go to Brighton, Nell,’ she said. ‘There’ll be more going on there.’
We went upstairs to my bedroom and got dolled up. We wore the dresses that we’d purchased from the little shop in Brighton. Jean produced a tube of lipstick and some rouge; I’d never worn make-up before and it all added to the excitement.
There didn’t seem to be any buses running so we decided to thumb a lift. We didn’t have to wait long before a car full of soldiers pulled up.
‘Brighton, ladies?’ said one of them.
‘Yes, please.’
There was so many of them in the car that it didn’t look as if there was room for us but they managed to squeeze us in. One of them tried to get a bit too friendly with Jean.
‘Hands off, love,’ she said. ‘I’m a married woman.’
‘And he’s a married man,’ shouted another soldier.
‘Nice try,’ said Jean, grinning and kissing his cheek.
‘I shall never wash again,’ he declared dramatically.
A couple of the soldiers threw their hats at him.
It was all in good fun and they were nice lads so we didn’t mind their high spirits – they deserved to have a good time after what they’d been through.
We waved goodbye to them at the Palace Pier and were immediately caught up in an avalanche of peo
ple much bigger than the crowd in Eastbourne. I tried to hang onto Jean’s hand but she slipped away from me. I started to panic; I felt as though I couldn’t breathe and without Jean, I was scared. I managed to push through the crowd towards the railings, where I took in great gulps of sea air. I stayed there until I felt a bit better, then started smiling. After all I’d gone through, here I was, scared of a few people out enjoying themselves. Pull yourself together, girl! I scanned the crowd, trying to find Jean.
‘Lost someone?’ asked a young lad in RAF uniform.
‘My friend,’ I said.
He bent down. ‘Here, climb onto my shoulders, you’ll get a better view.’
I was just about to take him up on his offer when I heard my name being called.
‘It’s okay,’ I said. ‘My friend is calling me.’
‘Then have a great time,’ he said, kissing me full on the lips and disappearing into the crowd.
I was quite shocked for a minute; it wasn’t every day that you got kissed by a complete stranger. But today wasn’t any old day, was it? It was the end of the war and I guessed that normal behaviour just didn’t apply. Today was a day of rejoicing and being carefree and kissing whoever you liked.
Jean called my name again and I shouted, ‘Jean!’ so that she knew what direction to go in.
Suddenly there she was, elbowing her way through the crowd – only it wasn’t Jean at all.
The plaits were gone and so were the glasses but I would have known that smile anywhere. ‘Lottie!’ I screamed, falling into her arms.
Chapter Forty-Five
We were both gabbling away at the same time – we couldn’t get enough of each other – but there was so much noise around us that we could barely hear.
‘Let’s go to my house, where we can talk properly,’ Lottie yelled.
‘I came here with my friend Jean,’ I yelled back. ‘I can’t just abandon her.’
‘What is she wearing?’ shouted Lottie, standing on tiptoes and scanning the crowd.
‘What?’