Still, she assured herself, everything would be all right. Her goal was to have a baby, and she couldn’t let herself be thrown off track just because he intended to have . . . fun. She could handle it. She had to. Having a child was the most important thing in the world to her. And vindicating herself was the next most important.
“Will you sign the document I had drawn up?” she asked.
“I will have the medical test for sexual disease, but I will not sign anything else.”
She wavered, then remembered—the document had been to ease his mind, not hers. She lifted her head and met his gaze. “All right, it’s a deal.” He smiled, and disconcertingly she thought she noticed a slight softening in him.
“Very good," he said, the baby-fine curl drawing another flicking touch from his fingers. “Now, go get dressed. Something a bit more formal than your jeans.”
“What?”
He waved a vague hand. “There’s a charity function. Normally I wouldn’t bother, but it’s a chance for us to catch my cousin Caitlin out of the nursery.”
“What?” she said again, realizing she didn’t only sound stupid, she felt stupid.
“My cousin, Caitlin. She’ll be there, along with her husband, Nico, and we can ask about the availability of one of the family suites at SwanSea.” “Why would we want to do that?”
“Because that’s where we’re going for the next two weeks. By the way, just exactly when are we going?” He gave her a grin that from anyone else she would have interpreted as engaging. “I didn’t read your chart.”
“My fertile period should start in approximately five days.”
"Five days. That should give me enough time to get things settled at the office.”
She stared at him, feeling as though a windstorm had caught her up in its force and was hurling her toward an unknown destination.
“Why SwanSea? I mean, why do we need to go out of town?”
“Because if I stay in Boston, my office will feel I’m still accessible. On the other hand, they view SwanSea as sacrosanct and don’t bother me there. Besides, it’s one of my favorite places in the world.”
Maybe it was a good idea, she thought. Perhaps she would be better able to relax in a place that to her was totally impersonal, without memories.
“Unless you’d like to stay here and get a head start on the fun and games, I suggest you go change. ”
The urge to take the course of least resistance and do as he said was strong, but the urge to reassert herself was even stronger. “What I would like is to stay here and have you leave. You don’t need me to be with you when you ask your cousin, and I can’t see a reason in the world why I should have to go to this function with you.”
“No?” With a few steps he closed the distance between them.
Automatically she took a step backward.
“That’s the reason,” he said softly. “You get nervous if I even come near you. How do you suppose you’ll react when you’re in bed with me?”
She crossed her arms beneath her breasts. “Ill be fine.”
“Will you?” He reached out and skimmed his fingertips down one silky cheek.
She jerked away.
He slipped his hands into his trouser pockets. "You obviously don’t feel comfortable with me, and knowing that, I sure as hell won’t be comfortable with you. Being in bed with you would be like being in bed with a bundle of thorns. The first time I tried to take you into my arms. I’d get stuck.”
“No—”
“I don’t like to bleed, Sharon.”
And she didn’t either, she thought, which was part of her problem. Aversion didn’t make her shy away from him. Fear did. She was terrified that her own responses would betray her in some way, and give him power to hurt her.
“All I’m suggesting is that we spend a little time together and blunt the sharpest edges.”
“I’m not sure spending one evening together is going to accomplish much.”
“It will be a beginning.”
She sighed. Much as she hated to admit it, he was again right. She had to overcome the tendency to react to him like a frightened virgin. Perhaps a social situation in which they would be together but not alone would help matters.
“All right,” she said, turning and heading for the bedroom. “Make yourself comfortable. It won’t take me long to change.”
As she had climbed her firm’s ladder to the top, she had been required to attend evening functions, so she had an extensive wardrobe of suitable dresses. She chose a gold one made of a wool, silk, and cashmere blend that fell in soft, fluid folds to her feet. It had long sleeves, a high round neck, and a deep cowl back. She donned the dress, then in a minimum amount of time, pulled her hair off her neck and twisted and pinned the long strands into a chignon. After putting on dangling gold and bronze earrings, she applied a light makeup to eyes, cheeks, and mouth, transferred necessities into an evening purse and walked back into the living room.
Conall threw down a magazine he had been reading and stood. His dark-eyed gaze swept over her. “You look lovely,” he said, his voice husky. “Really lovely. Shall we go?”
“Of course you can have one of the suites,” Caitlin said with a toss of her cinnamon-colored hair. “Why are you even asking? You know the fourth floor is always set aside for the family’s exclusive use.”
Conall shrugged. “I thought I should at least notify you.”
Her green-gold eyes sparkled with amusement. “There’s something else going on here, isn’t there? You hardly ever come to these charity functions anymore. Why did you come tonight? Does this have something to do with your date for the evening?”
A reluctant smile tugged at his mouth. “Try not to let your imagination get the better of you, Caitlin. It’s a very unattractive trait.”
“Would you like me to hit you?” she asked sweetly.
“No. Just notify your manager that I’ll be bringing a guest.”
“Who?”
“None of your business.”
“Okay, I’ll accept that. Basically, because as soon as you arrive, I’ll be able to find out who’s with you. By the way, you’ll have the fourth floor all to yourself. Nico and I don’t plan to go up for a while, and your parents just came back. Mother and Quinn have become quite the homebodies since their marriage and their move to their new place in the country. Uncle Seldon and his advisers held a political powwow up there a few weeks ago, but now he’s back out on the road.” She grinned. “I must say, I’m delighted you’ll be staying so long. I can’t remember the last time you’ve taken more than a three-day weekend.”
“Then I guess it was about time.” His smile grew until it was full blown. “So how is Wonder Baby?"
Caitlin laughed. “Dev is totally brilliant. We’re thinking of enrolling him in Harvard soon. And by the way, his nursery is beginning to resemble a toy store. Every day new packages arrive from his uncle Conall.”
“I want him to have a choice of things to do. Some variety. Poor kid, I’m sure he’s bored. I mean, all he does day in and day out is sleep, eat, and look at you and Nlco make fools of yourselves over him.”
“Very funny. Now tell me about Sharon.” Conall threw a glance over his shoulder. Across the table, Nico and Sharon were engaged in conversation. As he watched, she smiled at Nico. The smile was a trifle shy, but unlike the stilted, hard-edged smiles she had been giving him, it was genuine. Unsettled, he turned back to Caitlin. “Do you like her?”
Caitlin checked the emerald-studded watch on her wrist. “You only introduced us an hour ago, but from what I can tell, she seems very nice. The question is, do you like her? And will she be going with you to SwanSea?”
He shifted restlessly. "So Dev’s going to be a Harvard man? Don’t you think you should at least wait until he’s potty trained?”
Caitlin sat forward. "How really interesting. You’re evading the subject.”
“Just shut up and play along.”
Caitlin’s laughter peale
d out, bright and happy. “All right, all right. Well, let’s see. The other day, Dev distinctly said mama."
Conall looked properly amazed. “No!”
She nodded. “It’s true. Nico is sure he said dada, but I know for a fact he said mama."
Sharon surreptitiously gazed at the cousins, one so beautiful, the other so handsome. They sat close together, talking animatedly yet low, making it impossible for her to hear their conversation. But it was fascinating to watch them together. The two Deverell cousins were marked with the same qualities of ease, assurance, and a sense of belonging. She couldn’t imagine they had ever had a doubt in their life. She envied them.
“The Deverells have a unique quality all their own, don’t they?” Nico asked, obviously noticing where her attention was directed. “It’s as if the substance of their bone marrow is different from the normal person’s. They have an unspoken, unquestioning belief in themselves and the manageability of the world around them.”
Her baby would be one of those self-assured Deverells. The thought hit Sharon with a jolt. Funny she hadn’t viewed it that way before. But there was nothing she wanted more than to instill in her child a certainty and faith in himself and his own powers, and if his being a Deverell would make her job any easier, so be it.
She turned to Nico, a man who had an abun-. dance of the same traits. “I understand you’re also a Deverell.”
“I can’t deny it,” he said with a smile, “But my sister and I were raised DiFrenzas, and that's how we think of ourselves.”
Her gaze darted to the dance floor, where his sister, Angelica, with her long dark hair streaming down her back, gracefully glided to the music with her date. “Your sister is extremely beautiful.”
“Thank you. I think so.”
Her gaze continued over the dance floor to the tall, sandy-haired man named Amarillo Smith. He and his date, a sophisticated-looking blonde, also had places at their table. At the moment the blonde was doing her best to enchant him, with her body pressed closely to his, her head thrown back, her eyes gazing up into his, her lips parted.
Somehow Sharon didn’t think her tactics were working.
“Would you like to dance?” Conall asked. Startled, she looked up at him. She hadn’t seen him leave Caitlin and walk around the table.
“I..."
He grasped her elbow and helped her to her feet. “Nico, you don’t mind if I steal her from you, do you?”
Nico grinned. “Actually, I do. If you take her away, I’ll be forced to ask my wife to dance.” Much to Sharon’s surprise, Caitlin, society’s princess, picked up a bread roll and threw it at her husband. “You’ll pay for that, Nico DiFrenza.” "I can’t wait,” he murmured, a glitter in his dark eyes.
“Conall, how nice to see you!”
Sharon felt Conall start. She turned to see an older couple, their faces wreathed with smiles. She immediately recognized them as Conall’s parents and went ice cold.
“We didn’t know you would be here,” his mother said, an elegant woman with silver hair and an array of large, perfect diamonds sparkling at her neck, her ears, and on her fingers. “Why didn’t you call? We could have made arrangements to have you at our table.”
“It was a last-minute decision,” Conall said, leaning down to kiss his mother’s cheek. “And Caitlin said there would be room at her table.” “Hello. Aunt Rebecca, Uncle Lucas,” Caitlin called from her position across the table.
Rebecca Deverell sent Caitlin a warm smile. “Hello, darling. ” She reached around her son and patted Nico on the shoulder. “You’re looking much better than you were when Dev was born. You were so pale that night, we were very concerned."
Nico grinned sheepishly.
Sharon had been standing, paralyzed under Lucas Deverell’s acute scrutiny, and now she felt the force of his wife’s attention. “Introduce us to your date, Conall.”
"I’ll be glad to,” he said smoothly. “Mother, this is Sharon Graham. Sharon, this is my mother and father, Rebecca and Lucas Deverell.”
The lights of the room seemed to dim. She felt herself sway, then Conall’s hand was against her back, supporting her. “How do you do,” she murmured.
Lucas Deverell nodded pleasantly enough, but there was a sharpness in his eyes that made her stomach chum sickeningly.
“Sharon Graham,” Rebecca repeated thoughtfully. “That name sounds so familiar. Have we—?”
“No,” Conall said, abruptly interrupting his mother, “you’ve never met. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we were just about to dance.”
“Of course, darling. But do come by our table later, won’t you?”
“If it’s possible.”
Conall guided her out onto the dance floor and drew her into his arms.
She barely felt his left hand as it slid around her waist and pulled her against him. She didn't notice as he joined their right hands, or when he began to move in time to the music and she automatically fell in step. She didn’t even hear him when he murmured her name the first time.
“Sharon?” he repeated. She looked up at him, her face pale, her eyes pools of vulnerability. “There’s nothing to be upset about.”
A shiver raced through her. “Did you know they would be here?”
“No, but if I had, we still would have come.”
“They recognized my name.”
“I doubt it.” He lightly stroked her back, smoothing, soothing, trying to calm her nerves. “But even if they did, you shouldn’t let it bother you. They’re nice people. They wouldn’t have created a scene.”
“Nice? They didn’t want you marrying me, and they made sure you wouldn’t acknowledge that the baby was yours.”
“Sharon, you took a giant leap over very shaky ground to draw that conclusion. I’ve already told you you’re wrong to think they lied to keep us apart, or for any other reason. Now, relax.”
“How many other people know about me? Does Caitlin? Am I the family joke?”
Her voice broke on the last word, and he pulled her closer. “No one knows," he said quietly. “We weren’t together long enough for me to introduce you to any of the family, and only my parents knew that I was dating you and that you became pregnant.”
Her lack of response didn’t fool him into thinking he had pacified her. Her body was stiff, her expression distraught. He smiled gently down at her. “I can see where my parents might appear formidable to anyone who didn’t know them, but I’ll let you in on a little secret. They’re marshmallows.”
“I doubt that.”
“No, it’s true. When I was young, one used to protect me from the other, only neither ever figured out that the other one was doing the same thing. I can remember when I was about four or five, my father gave me strict instructions to stay out of his study. Naturally, like any other little boy, I regarded his warning as an invitation. One afternoon I decided it would be fun to play businessman. I sneaked into his study and sat at his desk and ‘read’ his papers. I also signed my name on every document I could find, just as I had seen my father do many times. Except, of course, I printed. But it was really nice printing, with good, solid, block construction of all my letters. Really, you should have seen it.” For the first time, she smiled, and, encouraged, he went on. “When my mother found me, I thought my life was over. I’d never seen her so angry. But my father came in, took one look at my stricken face, and announced he had given me permission to be in there. Later, when mother left, he told me if I ever did anything like that again, he would give me a spanking I wouldn’t soon forget.”
“And did you? Do anything like that again?”
“Of course. I was a little boy. But he never once spanked me. Neither did Mother.” He paused. “They really are nice people, Sharon.”
“There’s no reason for you to defend them to me,” she said dully. “They protected you as a little boy and they continued protecting you as you grew older. They sound like ideal parents.”
He gave a silent, colorful curse. He had meant t
o divert her, not remind her. Instantly he decided on another tactic. “I think I can safely say we’ve accomplished a great deal here tonight,” he said.
Slightly wary but nevertheless curious, she asked, “And what would that be?”
“Well, for instance, you don’t seem the least bit self-conscious about my holding you.”
She tensed, then, realizing he was right, she slowly relaxed again. While her mind had been on other things, her body had adjusted to his.
A silence that was oddly companionable fell between them, and as they continued to dance, her gaze wandered to the other people on the dance floor. She saw Angelica DiFrenza, vivacious and full of life, her dark eyes sparkling with gaiety as she laughed up at the man with whom she danced. Then there were Caitlin and Nico, matched in strength and love, very much involved with each other. And Amarillo Smith, a man with a stillness about him even when he was moving in time to the music, a man apart, even though he was holding a gorgeous woman in his arms. Finally there were Conall’s parents, standing at the edge of the dance floor, a group of people surrounding them. To her mind they all seemed larger than life; they were part of Conall’s life but would never be part of hers.
Conall . . .
“Conall?”
“Yes.”
“Thank you for trying to make me feel better.”
It had seemed natural at the time to try to vanquish the vulnerability he had seen in her eyes, but he supposed under the circumstances he could see why she felt It unusual. “You’re welcome.”
“And thank you also for intervening when your mother thought she recognized my name.”
Again it had seemed a natural thing for him to do, but now he realized he had been protecting her. How curious.
An incredible weariness came over Sharon all at once. The past few days had taken more out of her than she had realized, and it wasn’t over yet. She leaned her head against Conall’s shoulder and felt his arms bring her closer against him. The clean, spicy scent of him invaded her senses. His strength comforted and assured her. The music drifted through her mind and began to clear away the disturbing events of the evening.
The Promise Page 5