"I can go," I say, almost too enthusiastically. I don't really want to be stuck in here alone with him, even if our desks are separated by a closed door.
"No, it’s fine. I need to verify the catering for tomorrow's lunch meeting, anyway. I won’t be long; just do yourself a favor and remain out of his sight."
She turns and heads to the lift. I watch her enter and dread fills me. Why was I so stupid? Vivian and I are finally getting along; she’s actually being nice. Well, as nice as she can be, and I had to go and nearly ruin it! I need to work extra hard in the coming weeks to prove my worth. I can't let Lincoln mess with my head.
Thankfully, Lincoln doesn't leave his office all day. I show in his visitors and we both have our professional masks on. I have to admit, it’s killing me. I start to daydream about his amazing body and the tattoos. Just thinking about his hard body gets me distracted and uncomfortably wet. I shake my head and try to think about something else.
I make my way to the staff kitchen at three. I need a coffee; the lack of sleep is catching up with me, and my mind won’t clear to focus on work. I’m so focused on stirring my drink that I don’t see Simon enter.
"Hey there, tiny dancer." He smirks at me, and flashbacks of my disastrous night play back in my head, dancing like I’m in a 50 Cent film clip, rubbing up on Simon. Oh, my.
"Hey there. Sorry for running out on you on Friday. I was pretty sick, so I went home." He comes up and stands next to me, his body touching mine and its horribly uncomfortable. He feels, soft, and he smells like he’s been marinating in cologne overnight. It’s so strong I have to breathe through my mouth.
Can you blame the man, Har? He probably thinks he's in with a chance now!
"I was disappointed you left. I was hoping to see more of your . . . moves."
Eww . . . no. I move away from him and head for the door. Before I leave, I turn to face him. I need to say something, and I can't have him thinking I’m some cock tease.
"I had a good night, but I'm sorry about my behavior. I’m not usually like that."
He folds his arms and leans back against the countertop.
"I thought your behavior was perfectly acceptable. Maybe next time . . ."
He stops abruptly and I follow his line of vision. Lincoln is standing in the doorway. Shit.
"Don’t let me interrupt." He sounds angry.
"Um, I'll talk to you later, Harbour."
"Yeah, sure." I go to walk out as Lincoln moves into the kitchen, but Simon pushes in front of me and leaves in a huff.
I shake my head at Simon’s back. What a gentleman.
"Making plans for another amazing weekend, Harbour?"
Lincoln’s voice is laced with sarcasm.
"Uh, no. Not that it's any of your business anyway, Sir."
He leans over and puts his mouth right next to my ear. "I like when you call me sir. It makes me want to tie you up and spank your ass."
I gasp and push him away from me.
"You can’t talk to me like that! Not here, not ever. You ended it, Lincoln. I’ve accepted it; move on." I whisper harshly. I feel my face heat from embarrassment, and my breathing is heavy. He has such a profound effect on me. It’s unnerving.
He grabs my arm and looks into my eyes. His eyes are so blue they look like the oceans around the South Pacific. His pupils are dilated. Do I affect him too? Does he still want me? Damn him! I can’t do this.
"We need to talk, tonight. You said your piece now it’s my turn. I’ll bring dinner to your apartment at six p.m."
"Do I get a say in this?"
He walks out towards his office, and over his shoulder he says, "You had your say this morning."
He closes the door to his office, and I stand staring at it like a zombie. As much as I'd like to ignore him and his Neanderthal ways, I want to talk to him. I want him to come over. I want him.
That’s the bottom line.
Chapter Fifteen
It didn't occur to me until I arrived home that Lincoln has never seen the inside of my apartment. I quickly make the bed and throw all the wrappers and the empty wine bottle in my bin. It’s 5:45p.m. so I try to make it look as presentable as possible, then rummage through my tiny wardrobe for a pair of yoga pants and a tank top. There’s no way I’m putting on my pajamas. I'm checking my hair when I hear a knock on my door. My heart skips a beat and my stomach feels like it wants to empty out. I look in my bathroom mirror again and take a shaky breath. Here goes.
I open the door and Lincoln is standing there with a bag of Chinese food boxes in one hand, what looks like an Apple store bag in the other, and a nervous smile on his face.
"Come on in." I try to make my voice come out emotionless. I think I failed.
"I didn't think you'd open the door." He lets out a deep breathe giving me the impression he’s relieved I did.
"I considered it, but I’m hungry." I close the door behind him while he looks around. There is a frown on his face, as though he doesn't like what he sees. He takes a deep breath and exhales sharply.
"Nice . . . room."
"Yeah, I know. It's nothing fancy." I’m irritated by his obvious disapproval of my home.
"Harbour, I’m sorry. It’s nice, really. It's the neighborhood I don't like. I just worry about . . ."
"Well, you don't need to worry about me. I've lived here for nearly four months and nothing has happened . . . yet. If you're so worried about my safety, then you shouldn't be here. The only person who's really hurt me since I arrived is you."
Why did I say that? I'm trying to put on an I’m fine façade, and now he knows just how much he hurt me.
He sighs. "I'm sorry. I really am."
It’s my turn to run my hand through my hair with frustration. I ignore his apology and walk over to the two-seater sofa.
"We'll have to eat here. I don't have a table." I should be embarrassed, but I don't give a shit. It's either this, or go home to Melbourne, and that's not an option for me. I’ve fallen in love with New York.
He sits next to me and begins to unpack the boxes from the bag.
"That's a lot of food." I say.
"I didn't know what you liked, so I ordered a variety." He shrugs nonchalantly.
We eat in silence. It's tense. Lincoln occasionally lets out a sigh as if he doesn’t know what to say. I keep my mouth full trying to avoid the conversation we inevitably have to have.
I sit back and place my hand on my stomach. "I'm stuffed. Would you like a beer?"
"Yes please."
I begin putting the boxes back in the bag to take to the bin.
"I need you to hear me out."
Here we go . . .
I throw the rubbish in the bin and retrieve two beers. I hand him one and take a seat back next to him, my body angled in his direction. "Okay. Go ahead."
He picks at the label on his beer and stares at it like it might speak for him.
"I'm really sorry about the way I left things last night. I've never felt such a close connection to anyone in my life. Whenever I fuck a woman, I want her gone. Even with Rachael she would get up and usually grab her phone and leave the room after sex; I guess it made me feel used, so that’s how I began treating women—like I got mine, they got theirs, they can leave." He lets out a frustrated growl while he picks at the label on his bottle. "I'm not a fucking cuddler, Harbour. Not normally. But with you, I just wanted to hold you all night. I wanted to tell you everything about my life, and that scares the fuck out of me. I told you more in one weekend than I think I ever told Rachael. I was scared, Harbour. It just feels . . . abnormal. To feel this way after only knowing each other a few weeks? I don't know . . . Fuck!"
He's standing and pacing my tiny bedroom and kitchen. His hands are roughly running through his hair, and he looks like a caged animal.
"I don't know what to say."
"Do you feel it, Harbour? And don't fucking lie to me."
Do I tell him? Should I honestly reveal my feelings? I'm so worried that he'l
l hurt me. I'm scared I won't recover if he breaks my heart.
"Yes, and it scares me too." I say meekly. He stops pacing and kneels in front of me.
"What the fuck have you done to me?" He lunges at my face with his and kisses me with fiery passion. I grab his hair and pull it, releasing some of my anger of the last twenty-four hours. He wraps his arms around my back and pulls me up so I’m standing. His intensity takes my breath away. It scares me, but at the same time I feel at peace because his emotions are reflecting mine.
"Lincoln, we should talk first."
"We can talk later; I need to be inside you right fucking now."
He throws me on the bed and pulls my pants off.
"No panties, Har? Was I a forgone conclusion?"
He smirks at me and then pulls his grey V-neck T-shirt over his head. His abs ripple while he removes his jeans and slides them down to reveal his erection. I sit up and remove my tank top, now we're both completely naked. I admire his masculine body, his perfect tattooed chest, and his hard thighs. How did I think I could go on never seeing this again? How can any woman have been with him and later settled for anything less? He reaches for his wallet in his jeans pocket and produces a condom.
"Was I a forgone conclusion too?" I ask and bite my lip.
"Wishful thinking, baby. I believe in the power of positive thought."
He rolls the condom on and climbs over me. He kisses my neck and shoulders while massaging my breasts. He growls into my neck, "Have I told you your tits are fucking perfect?"
"Once or twice." I let out a moan of approval as his cock nudges my pussy.
Hearing my eagerness, he pushes himself completely inside me in one thrust.
Ow! Fuck!
"Fuck, Har, you're so tight. You feel fucking incredible."
He stills but I lock my ankles behind him and encourage him to move.
He's not gentle at all, and I love it. He's pounding into my needy sex so hard that the bedhead is banging into the wall behind me. My neighbors are either going to be really pissed or really turned on by the time we're done.
He continues to thrust in and out of me like a maniac, and I feel my orgasm building.
"Come for me, baby." he breathlessly whispers in my ear.
On command my body erupts, but I don't close my eyes. I stare straight at him.
"Fuck, you're so sexy when you come." He grabs my hips and pounds out his orgasm. He collapses on top of me but rolls onto his back, taking me with him. We're still intimately connected but at this moment, I feel we're connected in a much deeper sense. He holds me while I lay on his chest, both of us trying to regain some composure to speak.
After our breathing is back to normal, I roll off him and lay on my side, my head propped up by my elbow.
"I'm scared, Lincoln. What if this ends badly? What if you get bored and move on? I’m the one here with so much to lose."
He removes the condom and faces me.
"I don’t know if you heard me before, but I don’t want you temporarily, Harbour. I want you permanently. Every day. I’m in this for the long haul."
"How can you say that after only a weekend?"
"I could've said it after an hour." His face is completely serious.
"So what? We're going to actually date?"
"Yes. You're mine, Harbour, and I want everyone to know."
"Is this about Simon?"
"No, but yes. I want to make it clear that you're off the market. I don’t like other guys sniffing around what’s mine."
I roll my eyes and playfully hit him. "You're such a caveman."
"You love it. Anyway, I’m sure you don’t want women like Savannah trying to pull moves on your man . . ." He smirks at me. He knows I despise her.
"Ugh! She warned me not to touch you. I’m in deep shit with her!"
He lets out a loud laugh and lays his head back on the pillow. "She had no chance. Not my type."
"What's your type, then?"
"You."
There’s finality in his tone. His words are so sexy that I’m ready to jump him.
"No more talking." With that, I kiss him and he shows me again why he chose me and not her.
****
Lincoln spent the night at my place but he had no suitable work clothes on him, so we're at his apartment by seven a.m. He held me all night. Even when I got up to go to the bathroom, he reached for me.
We spoke a lot last night. I love how open he is about his feelings for me. He's scared, but so am I. I never expected to fall so hard, so fast.
We have decided to tell everyone we're together, starting with his parents first and then Vivian. I'm absolutely shitting myself. She warned me in the beginning not to get involved with Lincoln, and I looked her in the eye and told her she had nothing to worry about. I never expected this; I guess you can't help whom you fall in love with. Shit! Love?
How can I love him? I barely know him! But what I'm feeling is nothing I've felt before. This feeling is scary. Like falling and hoping someone will catch you.
I never understood how people got all crazy when they were in love. Why would you want something that makes you act like an idiot? I finally understand. People in love aren't stupid; they're brave and courageous. They put the most important part of them out there in the hopes that someone will reciprocate their feelings. No fear, just throwing your heart out there and hoping for the best. Falling in love is the most foolish and wise thing a person can ever do. I'm excited . . . and terrified . . .
Yep, I'm in love. Fuck!
Suddenly, dread fills me. What will happen to me when this ends? He's ruined me for other men. I've never felt like this. With Derek, I was just with him because it was easy, comfortable even. I guess my heart knew he was a dog; it was just easier to stay with him than to leave. I had accepted that I'd marry and have kids with him, but I didn't love him. I mean, I thought I loved him, but now I know that wasn't love. He never made my heart race by just speaking; I didn't get butterflies every time I saw him; and I definitely didn't want to lie in bed with him all day. He was a horrible bed partner, snoring like a freight train and never holding me. Even with him right beside me, I felt alone.
I always feel safe and wanted by Lincoln.
I can hear him on the phone to his parents while he changes so I head into the kitchen. Lincoln comes out of his bedroom dressed impeccably. He’s wearing a three-piece light gray suit, complete with a white shirt and emerald green tie.
"Nice tie." I comment
He adjusts it and looks over to me. "I thought the color was appropriate."
"Why's that?"
"Because when people learn that you’re mine today, they'll be green with envy." He winks.
"So cheesy! I love it . . ." I stand and walk over to him, and pull him towards me by said tie so I can kiss him deeply.
Yep, you're in deep, Harbour.
"We need to stop before I rip your pretty dress off and fuck you so hard, they'll hear you screaming my name at the office."
Great! I definitely need to start carrying around extra panties if he's going to talk like that.
"Okay, Dirty Mouth, let’s go." I adjust his tie and we make our way out of his apartment.
"We'll walk. It's a nice day." He grabs my hand and leads me out to the sidewalk and towards our office. Thankfully it's only a five-minute journey because my shoes are not walking-friendly. As we near the office, I ask about his conversation with his parents. "They can’t wait to meet you, my mom is over the moon." He answers with a smile. "We’ll talk about I more later, we’re here." I try to release my hand, but he grips it tighter. I look up at him, and he just shakes his head.
Here we go. I can already feel all the eyes on me. The lobby receptionist is giving me a death glare. Oh well, I guess I need to get used to this. I smile at her. It takes all my self-control not to poke my tongue out like a three year old.
We arrive at my desk, and Vivian is already there. Instead of being angry, like I expected, she looks down at
our entwined hands, gives a barely there smile, and says, "I had a feeling this would happen. Let’s go into your office, Lincoln. I think we all need to chat."
She leads the way. I follow like a child going to the principal’s office. Lincoln looks down at me, and smiles, squeezing my hand gently.
Vivian and I sit in the two seats opposite Lincoln's desk, and he releases my hand slowly to stand in front of us, propping himself on the edge of it.
"Well, can I say I had a feeling you two would hit it off. I’m happy for both of you, but . . ." Here it comes. ". . . we need to discuss how this affects the workplace."
"It won’t." I say, maybe a little too enthusiastically.
"Hmm, well I hope not, but just to be safe, maybe we should consider moving Harbour to another department."
"No, she won’t be going anywhere. You can trust us to maintain a level of professionalism, Viv."
She shrugs her shoulders. "Have you spoken with your parents, Lincoln? I’m sure word will get around; it probably has already. They'd be thrilled that you're dating again."
Wait, she’s a family friend? As if reading my mind Lincoln answers my unasked question. "Viv has been with the company for twenty years. She was my father’s assistant before I took over. And yes, Viv, I’ve spoken with both my parents, and they're looking forward to meeting Harbour tonight."
"Tonight? You want me to meet your parents?"
"No, whole family. My brother’s in town, so it's the perfect opportunity."
"Shit, Lincoln, isn't it a bit soon to meet your family?"
Vivian reaches over and pats my knee. "They’ll love you, Harbour, just be yourself."
I sigh, resigned to the fact I don't have a choice. "Okay, let’s get to work."
I stand and Vivian follows me out. Before the door is closed, Lincoln calls out. "Harbour, just one more thing."
I turn and head back into Lincoln's office, and Vivian closes the door behind her as she leaves. "Have a good day at work, baby." He kisses me deeply, like he needs it to survive the next eight hours.
"You too, handsome." I giggle and exit his office. It's gonna be a long day.
Noon fast approaches, so Vivian and I start setting up the conference room for the lunch meeting. I finish organizing the handouts just as everyone begins to enter. I don’t miss the look Savannah shoots me. I guess news travels fast.
Harbour (Runaway Home #1) Page 11