“I just said I liked her, squirt.”
He laughed in that magical way that only kids had. “Do you like her, like her?”
Evan’s heart tightened. “I do. I like her, like her very much.”
The smile suddenly vanished and Jacob looked at him with sober eyes, far older than his years. “Is she going to go away? Like Dad?”
Evan opened and closed his mouth.
He didn’t have an answer for that, not one he could give Jacob and be truthful.
“Baby?” Karen leaned in and brushed Jacob’s hair off his face. “We can’t ask those questions. You know that.”
Jacob nodded and closed his eyes, resigned to following the bullshit rules he should never have to follow.
“Here, want to listen to your music?” Karen took some earbuds out of her purse and offered them to her son.
Evan watched. He wasn’t terribly keen on speaking to this woman.
He glanced at the two FBI agents sitting across from them, watching Karen’s every move as she got the headphones on Jacob. He leaned back, eyes closed as the music began.
The FBI weren’t about to let Karen make a move without them there. One of the few details Evan had learned since being at the hospital was that Jacob’s case worker didn’t exist. Somewhere along the line CPS had been left out, and instead a mystery woman presented herself as Jacob’s case worker. It was that woman who’d brought the whole grid down somehow. Evan wasn’t clear on the particulars, but he understood the need to watch Jacob very carefully.
He studied Karen watching Jacob. She didn’t appear the least bit ruffled by today’s events. She’d taken them in stride. Because this was what her life was like?
Karen turned her head and regarded Evan for a moment. “You’re in love with my daughter.”
Evan decided he didn’t hear a question therefore he didn’t have to answer.
“It would be better for you if you weren’t. This family has a way of wrapping us all up in...” She gestured with her hand. “You know.”
He still didn’t reply. Her words weren’t going to change how he felt.
“My daughter hates me, and I understand why she does. Maybe she’s right.” Karen’s gaze slid back to Jacob, his head bobbing to some tune.
“Why’d you leave her? Why not take her with you?” Evan asked.
“You think I had a choice?” Karen glanced back at him and chuckled, but it was a bitter sound. “I love my husband as much as I love my children, and sometimes I think that’s my problem. It was always his decision. When I found out I was pregnant, he made the arrangements without my knowledge. I just went. He was never going to let both me and...Felecia go. I tell myself that, but I still don’t forgive myself. Believe what you like, but he loves us.”
“Do you know that Felecia doesn’t know what you named her when she was born?” he asked.
“Yes, because we changed her name every few years.”
Evan shook his head. “I don’t understand you.”
Karen stared at him. “Sometimes we love to the detriment of ourselves. If you love my daughter, it might be kinder if you left her.”
“Love doesn’t lock you in a cell. It doesn’t make you a prisoner.”
“We’ll have to agree to disagree.” Karen smiled. “I never wanted to leave her. I was forced to. If I was going to protect my baby—Jacob—I had to leave them. We don’t live in a world where we get to make our own rules—”
“Bullshit.” Evan shook his head.
“You don’t understand.”
He stared right back at her. “And maybe you never will.”
Love, real love, shouldn’t keep a person locked up. It shouldn’t mean holding a person prisoner. To Evan love was about sharing good and bad, it was about nurturing each other and being a shoulder to lean on. Felecia hadn’t gotten that from her family—the people who should have taught it to her in the first place—but maybe he could give it to her.
If she lived.
God, she had to make it. He couldn’t accept a reality where she didn’t.
FRIDAY. HOSPITAL. AUSTIN, Texas.
Felecia knew what a drug induced sleep felt like. She’d been in them enough to know she hadn’t done this to herself willingly. Where had her father taken her this time? What were they running from? Would this ever stop?
She floated in darkness becoming aware of aches and pains.
What had she been doing? Working out too hard?
All at once memories flashed. Her ankle and the plan to wear herself raw. The door bursting open and a man with golden hair and blue eyes looking at her.
Evan.
She wasn’t with her father. She should be with Evan.
What happened? Where was she?
Felecia clawed herself toward wakefulness. Every few moments she could crack her eyes open, but the overwhelming need to sleep pulled her back under. Each time she became aware of her circumstances a bit faster, Evan’s name coming to her quicker.
He was her touchstone, the thing calling her back.
At last she opened her eyes and they stayed open for several moments. The room was dark, so at first she wasn’t certain she wasn’t still sleeping. Then she heard the beeping and whirring of monitors. She frowned and glanced around her. If it weren’t for TV and movies she wouldn’t have known a hospital room for what it was, but she did.
Where were the others? Evan? His team? Kelsey? Jacob?
Felecia pushed upright, only to hiss at a pain in her shoulder.
She lay flat on her back, sucking down air, listening to every little noise.
Someone was talking, not in the room, but maybe in a hall or another room.
A single light bathed the room in a soft glow. She studied her surroundings as the throbbing pain subsided into a duller ache. The room was nice, though not as gleaming white as she’d seen on TV.
Once she could breathe without gritting her teeth, she pushed up with her good arm and studied the room.
On her left was a curtain pulled aside, blocking her view of that side of the room. She was surrounded by monitors and things hooked up to her. And on her right, through the forest of poles, she glimpsed two forms contorted to fit on one of the smallest sofas she’d ever seen.
Her heart did a painful leap.
Evan half lay on a sofa that looked more child sized than anything else. Stretched out on the cushions beside him was Jacob. He had his head on Evan’s shoulder and a blanket draped over them.
She didn’t miss that both were wearing the same clothes she’d seen them in last.
But they were okay.
Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes and she lifted her good hand to cover her mouth to stifle her sob.
They were alive.
Evan’s head rolled to the side then jerked up. He blinked at her a few times, then stilled. He blinked again, slower, his gaze focusing on her now. His lips moved a few times.
Felecia wished she weren’t tied down with all these tubes. She wanted out of this bed. She wanted to hug him.
Evan gently slid Jacob’s head to the cushion and got to his feet. It felt as though it took him forever to cross the room to stand next to her bed. He bent over the rail, taking her hand in his and pressed his forehead to hers.
“You’re okay,” he whispered, his voice thick.
“Am I? What happened? Are you okay? Why is Jacob here?” Her squeak of a whisper didn’t disturb her brother.
“He wanted to be here, and you needed blood. Your mother insisted he come up here. She was here for a while, but I never let her in to see you. Everyone’s okay. Your Mom and Dad are still in custody. Two of the Horsemen are dead. It’s over.”
Felecia blinked at him and decided to ignore everything about her mother.
Three of the four Horsemen were dead. What about the last one? Where was he?
Evan lifted his head. “Did you know you have a rare blood type?”
“No.”
Except for the few times she’d visit
ed surgery sites with her father, she’d never seen a doctor in person. That just wasn’t something they did.
“You scared me so badly.” Evan’s face creased in pain. “I thought I was losing you.”
Felecia did her best to squeeze his hand back. She was ready to stop having new experiences for a while. Boring and normal sounded ideal to her.
“Am I dying?” she asked, half afraid of his answer.
“What?” Evan chuckled and a smile flashed on his face. He must have realized she was serious. “No. No, sweetheart. You’re going to be fine.”
“Oh.” She let her head drop back into the pillow. All her strength felt like it was gone. She could barely make her hand curl around his.
“Two of the bullets nicked arteries. From the sound of it, you have all new blood. They are going to want to keep you here to make sure you’re healing, but after that I think you’ll be free to do what you want.”
“What I want?” That sounded wonderful and suspicious.
Did she know what she wanted?
Evan.
Jacob.
Those two were easy to think of, but she knew everything would be complicated. This was real life, not one of her TV shows. She couldn’t pine away for silly dreams that wouldn’t happen.
“Hey, I’m not going anywhere.” Evan stroked the hand he held.
Felecia eased her grip on him.
“You can’t say that.” Even in her muddled state she knew that.
“Sure I can.”
“No, you can’t. You have my dad. Everything. You’ll go back to...” She stared at him, realizing in that moment she didn’t know where he lived. Where he kept his things. Did he live in a flat or a house? Alone or with roommates?
“Felecia, babe, I’m not leaving you. Not even if Zora gets the director to order me, I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me. Unless you want me to leave?”
“No,” she whispered.
In her mind, that sense, the gut feeling that he was her future, took over her thoughts.
The knowing wasn’t real. She couldn’t believe it. Could she?
Evan leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. She closed her eyes, soaking in the smell of him, his warmth, everything.
“I’m not leaving you,” he said again, his breath caressing her cheek. “From the first moment I saw you I knew you were special. I didn’t fight this very well, maybe because deep down I didn’t want to. With you I feel...like I belong. I don’t think I’ve ever had that. I don’t want to give you up, Felecia. I love you.”
His eyes widened.
She stared at him, feeling her heart in her throat.
He loved her?
Evan opened then closed his mouth. The furrows on his brow smoothed and he tucked his chin in a bit, giving her that stubborn stare of his.
God, she felt something for him. All-encompassing. Overwhelming. Was it love?
Her heart said yes.
Her brain said this wasn’t a good idea.
And her gut? It had known from the beginning that Evan was it for her.
She was still Obran’s daughter. She would always be a target which meant the people around her were in danger.
In that moment she understood her father better than she had her whole life. His choices, locking her up, sending her mother and brother to America...
Felecia loved Evan, but she couldn’t tell him.
FRIDAY. HOSPITAL. AUSTIN, Texas.
Evan watched a fat tear roll down Felecia’s cheek. Her dark eyes were tortured.
He hadn’t meant to tell her that. Oh, he knew how he felt about her. Maybe he’d always known, but hadn’t accepted it.
Of all the people in all the world, he’d found the one he clicked with. The one who seemed to know him better than anyone.
“You can’t. You can’t love me.” Her voice cracked as she spoke.
He reached over for the cup of ice the nurse had begun switching out when they said she might start to wake up.
“Here, they won’t give you water or food for a while, but you can have ice. Your throat has to hurt.”
“Evan, you can’t love me.”
“Why not?” He set the ice in an empty paper cup.
“You just can’t.” More tears welled up in her eyes. He hated them, but he wasn’t going to take his words back.
“I love you. You can’t change that. You don’t have to love me back—”
“Look at what just happened. How many people got hurt because of me?” She shook her head. “You can’t love me.”
Understanding dawned on him.
Felecia had only known one kind of love her whole life. A selfish one. Her father’s love had made them all targets. She didn’t yet know she was getting a do over on everything.
“Zora listed you as one of the dead, under a made-up name. I told her you liked Felecia too much to give it up. You and your father are officially dead. Well, a woman we called Alexandra is dead. But she never really existed.”
“Is he dead?” She frowned, eyes still wide, caught between two emotions.
“No,” Evan said quickly. “He’s being moved. That’s something else we need to talk about.”
“Why?”
He wanted to get back to why it was okay to be together. Why he could love her. But if this was what she needed to know, he didn’t have much of a choice.
Evan sighed and launched into the full story. Might as well get that out of the way. “Someone’s always going to want your dad, so the best way to protect him and the Task Force’s interests was to make him go away.”
“Like he did for other people.”
“Only, your dad’s going to be locked up for the rest of his life. That’s the deal.”
“What deal?” she asked slowly.
“Zora cooked it up. He becomes a willing, cooperative prisoner and you, your mother and brother are off the hook. Karen and Jacob will have to move to DC, take on new identities and be cooperative, but nothing really changes for them.” He licked his lips. This next part fed into his plan. “You though... Your dad still thinks you’re important, that you’ve done so much of his work he can’t accurately tell us what we need to know without you.”
Felecia grimaced but didn’t say anything.
“I don’t know the full details, but Zora has green-lit a plan for you. After...” His heart skipped a beat and it felt like someone stabbed him. “After what you did for our team, she couldn’t ignore which side you were on. So, she wants to hire you in a way. She wants you to work in spy craft and to help verify what your dad tells us. You’d be working with our team.”
She’d be working with him.
Felecia opened and closed her mouth.
He rushed to fill in the other details. “I get it might not be what you want to do, but it’s not a bad next step. You won’t be bound to us. It’s a legit job offer. If you decide it’s not for you, you can quit.”
Felecia’s eyes couldn’t get any wider.
Evan wanted to crawl into the bed with her, wrap himself around her and never let go. But it had to be her choice. She couldn’t be trapped again. Her beautiful spirit was still a free, wild thing and he didn’t want to break that. He wanted to care for it.
“I... I don’t know what any of that means,” she said.
“It means you have people who’d look out for you. A job that would allow you to be independent. An apartment that comes with the job.” And me.
“I don’t know what to do with that.”
“That’s okay. You’ll have Kelsey, me, and everyone else in your corner.”
The tears returned, this time they fell in long streaks down her cheeks.
“I just want you,” she whispered.
“Oh, baby.” He leaned over and kissed one cheek, then the other. “You have me.”
“I don’t know if I love you.”
“You don’t have to.”
“I want to. I think I might, I just...”
“Sh.” He kissed her
lips, indulging in that moment before pulling back. “There’s time. We have all the time.” He hoped they did. If not, he’d take however much she’d give him.
“What if I don’t know what love is? What it feels like?” She spoke so softly he could barely hear her.
He swallowed and felt as if he were standing on a ledge. One leap into the unknown and he’d be a goner in the best way possible.
Evan stared into her eyes as he kissed her knuckles. “If you’ll let me, I’ll show you. Will you let me do that much?”
He held his breath, waiting for what seemed like ages until Felecia nodded. There was so much hope in her eyes, he didn’t dare disappoint her. He wanted to make a future with this woman he barely knew, and it felt right. Like they were made for each other.
“Evan?” Jacob’s sleepy voice sounded from the sofa.
Evan turned while Felecia quickly wiped at her cheeks. “Hey, your sister’s awake.”
“Felecia?” Jacob’s voice brightened.
He got up off the sofa and crossed to the other side of the hospital bed, smile so wide it nearly split his face.
It was time to make his own family, to carve out a place where he—and Felecia—belonged.
Epilogue.
Two weeks later...
Diha Balakrishnan bustled around her lab. There was much to do. Ever since Texas things seemed to be moving too fast for even her to keep up with. She was making progress with the forger’s files, which only soothed her rage a tiny bit.
They still had no idea who the real mole was.
That rankled Diha more than she’d admit to anyone.
As far as the team knew, they’d caught the mole responsible for paving the Horsemen’s way into the FBI facility in Austin. That had been the work of a fake CPS worker. The woman who’d looked after Jacob for less than twenty-four hours wasn’t a state employee at all. Diha could accept that the woman had allowed the Horsemen to crash the main and back-up systems locally, granting them access to the otherwise secure building. What Diha refused to believe was that this was the person who’d been sabotaging them at every turn.
But Zora had needed a win, so she’d run with what they could tell everyone else.
Maybe this false security would lure the real mole out.
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