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Morning brings sunlight and heat. I roll over to find Adam already up, dressing in his Volker uniform.
“Do you have to wear that today?” I ask. He didn’t wear it on the way down. He wore the same thing as the last time we tried to escape, black pants and a black jacket. “I prefer you in normal clothes.”
“It makes me look authoritative,” he tells me. “Something these people need. Something Ramirez needs to see.”
We dress and leave the train car, releasing the Guardians to wander with us for the day. I follow Adam to the Committee room. Alexander and Emanuel are already sitting at the table. Richard, Mateo, and Javier are there also, plates riddled with crumbs sit on the table in front of them. I scan the room quickly, looking for the source of breakfast, but it seems whatever was there is gone now. Emanuel stands when he sees the Guardians trail in behind us.
“What are those?” he asks, pointing to the large dogs.
“Don’t worry about them, after a while you’ll forget they’re here,” I tell him. “How do you communicate with Crane?” I ask.
He points to the laptop at the head of the table. I walk over to the laptop and open it. The screen is set up similar to the ones we have in Phoenix, but there is one thing different, an icon in the shape of a bird, just like the one etched into the glass door of our committee room. It must link back to Phoenix. I click on the bird and the image of an office pops up. It looks nothing like our Committee meeting room and I can only assume its Crane’s office.
“What are you doing?” Emanuel asks.
“Calling home,” I tell him. The computer emits a sound, not a ring but a choppy tone, something sounding similar to Morse code.
“No, stop!” Emanuel starts walking towards me. “I’m only allowed to contact him on Wednesdays. He gets very angry if I call on other days.”
“Well, it’s not you calling, it’s me.” I turn back to the screen and see Crane sit down in front of the computer.
“Ah, Andromeda, what a pleasant surprise,” Crane greets me, leaning towards the computer screen. “How are things in Florida?” he asks, folding his hands on the desk.
“Why didn’t you tell us Crystal River was a train-wreck? They’re down to two-hundred Residents.”
“Yes, well, if I had told you it would have only made it that much harder to get you to go there,” he replies with his smug smile.
“What are we suppose to do here?” I ask. “We can’t leave them like this.”
“I’m sure you’ll figure something out, that’s why I sent my best Sovereign.”
“This could take months, Crane, and I don’t have that kind of time.”
“Well then, I suggest you work quickly.”
I watch him press a button and the video screen disappears. Great, just great. I didn’t agree to this, not that I agreed to anything about this trip. But helping this District get back on its feet is something I don’t have time for.
This time I call the Committee meeting. And while I usually sit and listen at the Phoenix meetings, I take Crane’s place and manage this one. Even though I don’t want to. I just don’t have time to watch things fall into place. I have a deadline to get home and now we are falling hours, maybe even days, behind. I get no arguments from Alexander or Adam. I have the feeling that just like me, they want to get out of here, they would rather be elsewhere.
I find out that Crystal River was one of the last Districts to be set up. Their EMP went off right before the U.S. bombings. There wasn’t time to secure supplies or send help from Japan. Emanuel tells me the electrified fence still isn’t complete. Thankfully what is up is electrified by their nuclear reactor. Javier informs us they weren’t even able to collect all the people on the Funding Entities’ list to run the District. They have a small Volker force, an even smaller medical staff, and barely enough Residents to spread between the working factions. There are so many problems with this District that I don’t even know where to start.
Adam makes the first suggestion. “Since we’re unfamiliar with your region, let’s see some maps. Where your boundaries lie, where your main buildings are, how you have your factions divided.”
I let the men talk maps, my concentration interrupted by the grumbling of my stomach. I circle the room looking for any food they might have, but I find nothing. I head for the door, intending to go back to the train and get something from the rations we brought, secretly hoping that the quiet walk might help me form a plan for this place.
I leave the Committee room door open, knowing that at least two of the Guardians will trail behind me. As I near the front door I am greeted by a delicious smell. The Volker guarding the door holds it open as I walk outside, towards the large group of Residents standing in clusters around the parking lot. At the far end of the paved lot I can see smoke rising and something being turned over a fire. It smells like roasted meat, like bacon or steak, or a mixture of the two.
Just as I’m wishing I had eaten something for breakfast before leaving the train, and my stomach growls louder, someone hands me a plate with a steaming pile of the delicious smelling meat. I watch everyone around me talking and eating. I pull a piece of meat from the pile and chew it. It tastes just like it smells, smoky and savory. I put another piece in my mouth just as one of the Guardians walks over, knocking the plate out of my hand and onto the ground. It begins barking a roaring, deep bark. I remember that the Guardians don’t bark unless they sense danger, or when I’m doing something truly dumb. I just stare at the dog, feeling the savory meat hit my stomach, filling me with a sense of ease and relaxation. The Guardian continues to bark. Time seems to slow as I watch the dog. I turn around when I feel the pressure of a hand on my shoulder. It’s Adam, staring into my face, talking at me. At least, I think he’s talking at me. For some reason I feel like I can’t quite hear him. I try to focus hard on his lips as he speaks until I can make out what he’s saying.
“What happened?” he repeats.
I simply smile at him, feeling the muscles in my body relax.
“She ate the manatee,” a deeply tanned Crystal River Volker says from behind Adam.
“Manatee?” Adam asks. “You eat Manatee here?”
Emanuel appears at his side. “We don’t eat Manatee. The Residents do. It contains their medication.”
I see Adam’s face twist into a scowl and I’m not sure why. I want to get him some of the delicious manatee meat so he can feel like this too. So he can feel this warmth, this relaxing, blissful warmth. I haven’t felt this tranquil in years. But he’s holding onto my arm, pulling me back to him each time I try to wander away.
“Stop moving, Andie,” he tells me. I do as he says, standing at his side, watching the conversation going on around me. My desire to move is lost. “How much of the medication?” he asks Emanuel.
“It’s saturated with a full dose. She said to get them back up to full doses,” Emanuel points at me. Looking between us, then he seems to settle a little. “Don’t worry, Colonel Waters. It should wear off in about a day.”
“Don’t tell me not to worry,” Adam snaps back at him. “She’s pregnant. That medication made the women in our District deliver early, all of the infants died.”
For a moment I think to correct Adam. Not all of the infants died. Ian’s baby survived. But I don’t feel much like doing anything. I guess I really have no desire right now. I let the thought pass and continue to stand there, basking in this wonderful relaxed feeling, waiting for someone to tell me what to do.
I stand complacently at Adam’s side and listen as he barks out orders. “Alexander, get their train fixed. Ramirez, take the other Sovereign and get the Residents to start cleaning up some of the debris from the storm.” I feel his warm hand wrap around my wrist. “Come with me, Andie.” I follow him obediently as he walks back to Headquarters, leading me to the committee room. He tells one of our Volker to get food and water from the train and tells Emanuel to fetch the District Doctor.
“We don’
t have a doctor anymore,” Emanuel replies. “He died eight months ago, contracted Malaria. It’s been a bad mosquito season.” I watch Emanuel as he shrugs. “We only have a small staff of nurses and a few nurse practitioners left.”
“Forget it then. They can’t help.” Adam paces the room in front of me. His boots make heavy thuds on the linoleum floor. “How do you know it will wear off in a day?”
“We had a Sovereign eat the medicated rations before. It was actually quite comical, he did everything we told him, and in the morning he remembered nothing. I think that’s why they make us titrate the doses down, so the Residents will remember something.”
Adam stops in front of me. “Sit down, Andie.”
I sit in the chair behind me, folding my hands in my lap.
“How does the medication affect pregnant women?” he asks me.
“It’s the hormones,” I reply. “They send the body into premature labor.”
“Is there a way to stop it?” he asks.
“Stop the medication,” I answer.
Adam crouches down in front of me. “What happens if a pregnant woman receives one dose?”
“I’m not sure. All the ones in Phoenix had received multiple doses.”
He lets out a sigh of exasperation, rubbing his hands over his face. The door opens and our Volker enters carrying a plate of food and bottle of water. Adam takes it from him, setting them in my lap. “Eat this, Andie.” I look down at the plate containing two apples and half a loaf of bread and start eating, just as he told me.
“What are you going to do?” Emanuel asks.
“I have to call Crane.” He walks to the laptop. After a few moments I hear the same choppy tone as before.
“Colonel Waters, how can I help you?” I hear Crane’s voice.
“Someone gave Andie food laced with the Resident’s medication,” Adam tells him, evading all pleasantries.
“Ah, well, she should work quite efficiently today then, without her conscience and poor attitude getting in the way.” I think I might hear him chuckle a little.
“What can I do to get it out of her system?” I watch him lean into the computer, his hands curled into fists on each side of the table.
“Nothing,” Crane replies.
“She’s pregnant,” Adam argues. “She can’t deliver down here, neither of them will survive.”
“Andromeda will be fine. Let the medication wear off.”
“And the baby?” Adam stands, crossing his arms over his chest.
I think about telling him to get some of the manatee meat, it might help calm him down. I let the urge pass, biting off another chunk of the bread.
“Let me ask you this, Colonel Waters, why are you so worried about her baby?” Crane asks.
Adam hesitates, “…because it’s mine.”
“Well now, Colonel Waters,” Crane replies, a hint of amusement in his voice. “Of all the people, you’re the last I would expect to put yourself in such a predicament. I suggest you remember what your job is and who you work for.”
I’m not sure if the conversation continues. I can’t hear much over the sound of biting into the crisp apples that were brought to me. I sit in my seat, sipping at the bottle of water, watching the men deep in conversation at the table in front of me. Time seems to languish, but I am happy to sit in my seat. I have no desire to get up and leave, or involve myself in their conversations. People leave the room. Adam brings me more food, two of the Guardians lay down on the floor, one on each side of me. I start to think that these men talk far too much.
“Andie, come with me, it’s time for bed,” Adam tells me.
I realize that we are alone in the room. And I am suddenly feeling overtired. I stand and follow Adam out of the room, obediently. My legs prickle from sitting for so long. I follow him down the long hallway, out of Headquarters, and to the train platform. I barely notice the diamond filled night sky that floats above us.
“What do you sleep in?” Adam asks picking through my luggage, a flashlight pinched between his ear and shoulder, shining into the bag.
“There’s a long t-shirt in there,” I respond from the bed, where he told me to sit. “I think.”
“I can’t find it.”
I hear him rustling through another bag, not mine. Then he is kneeling in front of me, setting the light on the bed. Casting a bright glow on the wall and leaving the rest of the sleeping bunk in dark shadows.
He reaches for my foot. “Let’s get you out of these clothes,” he tells me, pulling my sandals off, reaching for the button to my slacks. He tells me to stand up and I do, watching him pull the pants down over my hips, leaving me in my top and underwear. Usually I have no problem dressing myself, but I just continue doing what he tells me. He stands, reaching for the hemline of my blouse, pulling it off over my head. A moment later he pulls a dark shirt over my head, taking my hands and pushing them through the armholes. The material is soft and it smells wonderful, it smells just like Adam. I look down at the black shirt as it falls to my knees.
“It’s one of my shirts,” he tells me.
“I like it.” I run my hand over the worn fabric. “Can I keep it?”
“Sure,” he laughs a little, looking around the train car, his mood shifting. “Sit down, Andie. I have to ask you a few things.”
I sit on the edge of the bed, waiting passively for his questions.
“How long have you known about the other Districts?” he asks.
I answer without hesitation, “Since Crane had me analyze the first set of data, over a year ago.”
“How did you find them from the data?”
“There were extra samples, the people looked like they were from different places.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s hard to explain what I see when I look at their genetic data. I see what they look like.”
“And you told no one?”
“No.”
He moves on to what I saw the day of the bombings, if I asked about him when I was relocated to the Pasture, if I told anyone about our relationship. I tell him what I saw, that I didn’t ask anyone about him, that I never told a single soul about us. Then he turns to questions about Ian. How long we were married for, what did Ian do at the nuclear power plant and why I didn’t argue to save Ian.
“Crane didn’t give me a choice,” I tell him. “I had to protect my child.”
“Do you love Ian?” he asks.
“I’ve always loved Ian. He was my first, my first everything. He’s Lina’s father.”
Adam stands, pacing the narrow walkway between the bunks. “Who is the father of your baby?”
“You are, Adam.” I smile at him. The question seems strange to me, he knows who the father is.
“Do you want me to tell the others about us?”
It takes me a moment to answer this question. It isn’t as simple as the others. There’s something I need to remember, something I’ve been ordered to do. “You can’t,” I tell him. “I’ve been ordered to choose my own pair before the baby comes, before I become a Funding Entity. They offered to give me Ian back.”
Adam stops in his tracks, his features soften. “What did you tell them?”
“Nothing,” I reply.
“Who have you chosen, Andie?”
“I don’t know yet.”
He kneels in front of me again, his voice changed, now thick with emotion. “Do you love me?”
This question confuses me, and I’m not sure how to answer, because I’m not sure if I can love two men, if it’s right to love two men at the same time. I like Adam, I like him a lot, the way he smells, the way I feel when he touches me, and I feel safe when he’s around. But is that enough to constitute love?
“Do you love me?” Adam repeats himself, the soldier tone returning to his voice, demanding me to answer.
“I’m not sure. I’m confused,” I tell him. “There are so many things. I think I might, I think I could…” I search for the right words in my fogg
y mind.
He pulls my hands to his chest and I can feel the thumping of his heart under his bare skin. “Do you trust me?”
Finally, an easy question. “Yes,” I tell him.
Of course I trust him, every word he says, every motion he makes. Right now I trust him more than I trust myself. Still, there’s something blinking in the back of my brain, a warning maybe, a memory. I ignore it, pushing it into the darkest sections of my brain, it can’t possibly be more important that what Adam is asking me right now. It can’t possibly be more important than his hands on my distended abdomen and whatever he is searching my eyes for.
CHAPTER twenty
I wake to the motions of the train moving. I look down to see that I’m wearing nothing but a black t-shirt, which smells just like Adam. And when I look out the window, I see the tan blur of what I can only assume is the desert. I get the sense that something happened, that I’m forgetting something. I just can’t place it.
Adam enters the sleeping car just as I try to stand up, my wobbly legs threatening to collapse underneath me. I grab the support beam for the bunk. Adam rushes towards me. “Sit down,” he says in a stern voice.
“Since when did you start ordering me around?” I ask him.
He stops, seemingly shocked at my response. “I just didn’t want you to fall.”
“Why are we moving? What happened?” I ask him.
“We are headed to the District in Arizona, the Tonopah District.”
“What happened to Crystal River? All I can remember was we were in a meeting and then, I’m not sure what happened…” I look around the car, and down at my bare legs, hoping something might trigger a memory.
“We had to leave Crystal River. We can consult with them later. It wasn’t safe for you there,” Adam tells me.
“But they’re not secure, that District is in shambles.” I look around the small room for my bag. I locate it in the corner of the room. It’s open, the clothes spilling out.
The Phoenix Project Series: Books 1-3: The Phoenix Project, The Reformation, and Revelation Page 45