To the Steadfast

by Briana Gaitan

  “Doing well. How’s school?”

  “Just fine.” I turn to Mrs. Carmike, whom I’ve never met, but have seen from afar, and give her a fake grin. She looks over me with distaste before taking a sip of the martini in her hand.

  “I need to sit,” she mumbles before scurrying off.

  “Dakota does afterschool tutoring,” my mom announces. I don’t have the heart to tell her I dropped out of the program months ago.

  I open my mouth to say something lame when the doorbell rings again. “I’ll just get that,” I say, glad to get away from them.

  I walk to the door and pull it open to see Killian standing there in a button-down shirt and slacks.

  “Thank God!” I exclaim, grabbing him and pulling him into the house. “I can’t be left alone with them for another moment, and what is with your mom?”

  “She’s in a bad mood. Correction, she’s in a never-ending bad mood.”

  “Don’t you dare ditch me! My mom is trying to get your dad to write a letter of recommendation.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll do anything for food. Do you even want a letter from him?”

  “I guess it will make my dad happy.”

  Killian shrugs. “Don’t worry about it. I’m sure he’ll do it. Wanna smoke a joint before we eat?” He whips a joint out of his pocket and waves it in front of my face.

  My eyes light up. This will piss my mom off. “We’ll be back, Mom! Just going to show Killian our garden.”

  Before she can answer, I whisk Killian through the house toward our backyard. Behind the pool is my old playhouse. It’s only one room and built to represent a miniature castle. I open the front door and bend down so I can walk inside. I’d begged my dad for a whole year before he had the house built for me. I’d even had it furnished with a mini fridge and everything. I still come out here sometimes.

  Killian gives a low whistle as he sits down in one of the miniature chairs. “Nice place you got here.”

  “It’s where I take all the guys,” I say with a wave of my hand.

  He lights the joint and passes it my way. “So, where’s your dad?”

  “Who knows? Working?” I inhale and hold it slowly as I think about how little my dad has been around. Even more so than usual.

  “About this prom thing. I hope I didn’t put too much pressure on your earlier.”

  “No! No, I want to go.”

  “Good. I can’t believe no one asked you.”

  “Believe it.”

  He blows the cherry out of the end of the joint and puts it back in his pocket. “How many of these dinner parties are you forced to bullshit through every month?”

  “One, two, sometimes more.”

  “Then,” he leans in, eyes sparkling with amusement. “Let’s make this the worst dinner party in the universe and we won’t have to sit through another one of these things again. Our parents will be so embarrassed they’ll never take us out again.”

  “You’re on.” We climb out of the playhouse and walk back inside.

  Before we enter the dining room, Killian ruffles up my hair and untucks his shirt. “Let’s give them something to worry about, huh?”

  “You are bad,” I hiss, hiding a smirk.

  “There you are!” my mother sings out, walking over to grab my arm. She sniffs a few times. “You smell like marijuana.”

  “No, Mom. It’s Chanel no 5.” I wave my hand at her and laugh.

  She glares at me before turning to Killian. “Killian, dear. Your mother went home. She was feeling ill.”

  “Wonderful.” He slaps his hands together and rubs them back and forth. “Now what have you cooked up for us, Mrs. Lombardi?” He walks further into the room where his father is already seated, waiting.

  “Mother doesn’t cook,” I announce. “Mother orders food.”

  She giggles nervously. “Normally I cook, but tonight I wanted Cook to prepare something special. Veal.”

  I make a gagging noise and Killian joins in.

  “Mrs. Lombardi, when did you feel it was all right to serve houseguests baby cow?”

  “It’s a delicacy,” she says with a look of pure shock on her face.

  The Senator clears his throat and cuts in. “So, Dakota. Your Mother tells me you are applying to Columbia next year?”

  I sit down across from Killian’s father and unfold my napkin. “That’s what I’m being told.”

  That remark earns another glare from my mother so I go on. “You know, anything to make sure I’m a thousand miles away.”

  One of the servers hired for tonight sets a salad in front of me.

  “Well. I’d be happy to write you a letter providing your grades are in order.”

  “I’m failing chemistry, but other than that, I’m in tip-top shape.” I hold an arm out and flex my practically nonexistent muscle.

  “She’s kidding,” my mother says.

  The senator takes a bite of his food. “Killian tells me he’s taking you to prom.”

  My mother looks up from her plate. “Haven’t you already graduated, Killian?”

  “Yes, but Cody didn’t have a date so I offered my services.”

  The Senator leans forward with his wine glass in hand to stare the two of us down. “She’s sixteen—”

  “Almost seventeen,” I correct.

  “Barely an adult,” he says with a disapproving look. “Killian, you are twenty-years-old. I’m not sure a relationship between the two of you is appropriate for our family image.”

  Killian drops his fork on the plate. A loud clank resonates through the room, filling the uncomfortable silence. “We’re just friends, Dad.”

  “Then this conversation is over.”

  Killian glances my way, mentally apologizing for his father’s behavior. I take a bite of my food and chew in silence until something hits me in the cheek and falls on my plate. I look down to see a huge black olive staring up at me. Gross.

  Both our parents stop midchew as another olive falls in my lap.

  Horrified, I look at Killian, who has plastered an innocent look on his face. I pull a piece of my croissant off and chuck it back at him.

  “Ouch!” Killian holds his hand over his right eye. “You got me right in the ball!”

  I answer by sticking my tongue out at him. “You know I hate olives.”

  “Children!” my mother exclaims, pounding one fist on the table. Our giggles halt immediately.

  Beneath the table, Killian’s leg nudges mine.

  “Dad, are you sleeping with Cody’s mom?” he asks.

  His father chokes on his food, almost turning blue before taking a drink of his water. “Okay, this dinner is over. Killian, get back to the house now.” He rises and throws a napkin on his plate before walking from the room.

  “Please don’t go,” my mother calls out to the Senator, but he doesn’t stop.

  Killian stands and pretends to look perplexed. “I didn’t expect him to get so upset. Guess I’m never going to be invited to another dinner party again.” He hangs his head in shame, but I can detect a smirk hidden in the shadows. “Later, Cody. Sorry I didn’t get to try your lovely baby cow, Mrs. Lombardi.”

  “Traitor,” I mouth as he walks away, leaving me alone with the monster.

  I twirl in front of the mirror and hike my short dress up a little more. Picking up my phone, I dial Violet’s number.

  “Hello?”

  “I’m having second thoughts about this orange dress. I mean, who wears orange to a prom anyway?”

  “The orange was way hot, but like I said. This whole prom thing is stupid anyways. I can’t believe you’re going.”

  “Don’t be jealous,” I tease.

  The doorbell rings.

  “Is Mischa going to be at the bonfire?” The entire after party will be mainly seniors and juniors, so it’s a possibility.

  “I don’t know. He’s been pretty busy.”

  “I noticed he’s been out of school.” I try to make everything come out natural, but it’
s hard.

  “Yeah, things have been…not good. I’ll tell you more about it later.”

  The doorbell rings again.

  “Killian’s here. Gotta go.” I hang up and grab my purse. No more than a second passes before I hear Killian calling my name from outside my window. I push it open and stick my head out.

  “Why are you screaming? I have a front door.”

  He pops the collar on his white suit and spins around. “I feel like I’m reliving high school. I don’t like this.”

  “Why not? You were Mr. Popular. Everyone loved you.”

  “I have a surprise. Come over when you’re ready.”

  “Your dad isn’t home?”

  “Senate, remember? How about your mom?”

  “Gone, too.”

  “Awesome. Hurry up. I’ll be inside waiting.”

  “I’m coming, I’m coming.” I shut my window and slip into my heels before heading downstairs.

  I walk across my front yard to Killian’s front porch and let myself in.

  “Killian?”

  “In here!”

  I follow the sound of his voice into the kitchen where he stands in front of a small table set with candles and flowered china. There’s an intimacy in the air, probably from the dim lighting. No one’s ever gone all out like this before. Killian has his digital camcorder in his hand, pointed straight at me. A little camera shy, I cover my face.

  “Why are you filming me?”

  He makes a slight bow before pulling out my chair. “Prom comes but once in a lifetime.”

  “It’s junior prom, not senior prom.”

  “Nonetheless, these are the years that shape your memories, and I want to make sure you have some good ones.”

  “You’re a good friend, Killian. Thanks.”

  He picks up a camera and puts one arm around my shoulder as he pulls me close for a selfie.

  “Say cheese.”

  I smile as the camera clicks a few times. He sits and hands me a basket of French bread.

  “Looks good.” I take a bite of my lasagna. “You know, I bet most parents are taking pictures of their daughters before prom.”

  “We don’t have most parents. I think my dad gave me a box of condoms before prom and told me not to get anyone impregnated. You know, before election.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Yeah, he didn’t even get me magnum sized, so I had to toss them.”

  “You jerk!” I cover a smile but wonder if he’s joking or not. Killian is a tall guy, so it’s practical to think he might have bigger than average male parts.

  “I’ve been called worse.”

  The rest of dinner goes by fast, and before I know it, we’re walking into the school. It’s dark and decorated with cheesy streamers and balloons. All the excitement I’ve built up is diminished as I realize this is just another dance; nothing life-changing is going to happen tonight.

  Violet jumps next to me as we walk toward the food.

  “Looky at my dress,” she says. “Got it for a real steal. A five finger discount.”

  She spins around to show a dangerously low cut back. It’s orange, just like mine. A bit of anger surges through me. She knew orange was the color of my dress and just had to show up looking better.

  Swallowing my emotions, I say, “I thought you weren’t coming.”

  “I’m kind of seeing this guy and he invited me like half an hour ago. His date got sick or something.” She lowers her voice. “I have something for you.” She looks at Killian and extends a hand. “Hi, I’m Violet.”

  “Killian Carmike.”

  “The senator’s son, of course. Nice to meet you.”

  He puts on that sickening sweet Killian charm. “You, too.”

  Violet snakes an arm around me, a wide grin never leaving her face. “We have to go to the bathroom. Be right back.”

  When we are out of earshot, she hisses in my ear. “Tell me you are sleeping with him.”

  “Oh, gross. We’re friends.”

  “Well, you need to. He’s hot. He’s got that cute baby face and those eyes!”

  “He’s cute, but I’m not interested in him.”

  “I have an early birthday present.” She holds up a small blue pill and waves it in my face.

  “What? Is that Viagra?”

  “No, stupid. It’s ecstasy. Compliments of my date.”

  I push it away. “No, thanks.”

  She forces it into my mouth. “I’m not going to roll alone. Now swallow.”

  Giving in to her peer pressure, and the need to try everything once. I swallow and give her a smile that says “Happy?”

  “Now, I want to dance and dance!”

  She grabs my arm and drags me back into the gym where I find Killian and pull him along with me onto the dance floor.

  I’m hot.That’s the thought that wakes me up. I’m so hot, and I can’t breathe. Opening my eyes, I find naked arms and legs strewn across me.

  “Ugh!” I cry out, moving away from the bodies and rolling off the bed. Violet and a guy I’ve never been introduced to but have seen at parties are both on the bed naked. I have on my bra and panties, thankfully. Killian sits in the corner of the room with his head slumped over. He’s still in his suit.

  “Killian?” I hiss. “Killian.”

  He groans a little before lifting his head. “You’re awake.”

  “Yeah, and I have no idea how we got here.” I remember bits and pieces about last night, but it feels like a dream.

  “You and Violet danced all night, and when prom was over you wanted to dance more so you offered up your house.”

  That’s right. We’re in one of the guest bedrooms downstairs.

  “Violet and that…” I realize I don’t even know this guy’s name. “She and that dude are naked.”

  “Yeah, I know.” Killian’s eyes widen slightly before he stands up and stretches.

  “Did we?” I motion between the two of us and make a few suggestive motions with my hands.

  “Have sex? No, I don’t take advantage of girls on drugs.”

  “You knew I was high?”

  “God, you told me more than I wanted to know last night.”

  I cover my face in embarrassment. I have a tendency to say too much when I’m high. “I’m sorry.”

  “Can you two shut up?” Violet yells from the bed. “Take it outside.”

  Killian opens the door and I follow him out into the hallway.

  “So you stayed to make sure I was okay?”

  “Something like that. Listen, I know Violet is your friend, but when you two are together, it’s like this dynamic duo of trouble. You’re different around her. It’s like you two are trying to compete or something. I’m sure she’s a great friend, but she’s reckless and…”

  “She’s my friend. She’s practically my only friend.”

  “What about me?” He raises an eyebrow at me.

  “Violet is my only female friend.”

  “She’s a bad influence. The Cromwells will do nothing but drag you into trouble with them.”

  In no mood to fight, I stomp into the kitchen. “Don’t tell me anything else about last night. I’d prefer to live in ignorance. Now sit. I’m making pancakes.”

  After breakfast, Killian returns home in one of those moods where he pretends he’s okay, but I know something is still bothering him. He has every right to be upset, but it was my prom to ruin, not his.

  The entire weekend is a recuperation from prom, and though I can’t remember much of what happened, I dread school on Monday. Finals are over, so instead of going, I decide to skip and spend the day in Atlanta, maxing out my father’s credit card.

  I’m getting gas at the only station on the edge of town when someone taps me on the shoulder.

  “Hey, Cody.”

  I turn around to see Mischa in a button down shirt with Brown’s Auto embroidered on the pocket.

  “Mischa! I didn’t know you worked here.” Seeing him brings a flush to my fa
ce. I’ve missed him at school.

  “Yup, that’s me. Attendant slash part-time mechanic.”

  “Wow, that’s great. So you aren’t going back to school? You’re so close to graduation.”

  “Someone needs to make money. My mom sure as hell isn’t doing it. Besides, there’s only a few more weeks left.”

  “You can do better. You’re too smart to work here,” I blurt out.

  He scratches the back of his neck and changes the subject. “Good news. I might have a car in the works.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, well. I have a lot going on with my dad and all, but maybe we can get together sometime soon and chill.”

  My gas pump stops, alerting me that it’s time to go, but I can’t stop staring at him and the way the sweat glistens off his skin in the hot Georgia sunlight.

  “I get off in a few minutes. Wouldn’t care to give me a ride home, would you?”

  I pull the pump out of the car and replace the gas cap. “Well, I kind of had plans.”

  “Please? I’ve really wanted to call you, but things have been crazy.”

  “Okay, why not?”

  “Great. I need to finish up something, and I’ll clock out and meet you in a minute.”

  I return to my car, not sure exactly how this has happened. A few minutes ago, I was on my way for some much needed R&R.

  Mischa keeps to his words and is in my car within a few minutes.

  “Your place?” I ask.

  “Yep.”

  We leave the gas station heading towards his home. I wrack my brain for an excuse to prolong our time together. I could invite him to hang out with me, but he’s a mess, a hat-headed, grease stained mess.

  “What have you been up to?” I ask.

  “The usual. You?”

  “Prom.”

  “I heard.” His answer is short, but I detect a bit of annoyance. I decide to probe for answers.

  “Something wrong?”

  “No, I mean you went with Killian Carmike? That’s great.”

  “Great? You said you wanted to date me and you disappeared. You don’t come to school, you’re not at home, you just left me hanging.”

  “I know.” He doesn’t elaborate so we both sit there until I pull up to his house.

  “I wish I could tell you why I disappeared, but for now I need you to trust me. I had a good reason, I promise.” He runs his hand down the side of my face.