by A. O'Connor
“I’m sorry, Anna. I don’t know the reasons you were there, but it’s none of my business. . . You’re a great lady. Everyone says it.”
“No, I’m not,” she said between the sobs. “You’re right. I’m a terrible wife, in every sense of the term. I’ve made Edward so unhappy. He deserves so much more. I’ve been easily led by Georgina, and made a mockery of my marriage.”
She sat up and looked at him, her face tearstained.
“I don’t think I can ever bring Edward happiness. I’ve failed him by what I did today, and I’ve failed myself.”
He shook his head softly and smiled at her, but his eyes welled up from looking at her unhappiness. “No, you haven’t. He adores you. I see it every time I see you together. His face lights up when he sees you and when he’s in your company.”
She looked at him. “I’d never have thought you’d notice such things.”
“I notice a lot, Anna. I see a lot. And I see you’re going through a time of unhappiness. But it’ll pass. And you’ll move on with your lives, and yesterday at the fair will seem just a bad dream.”
“I hope so,” she whispered. “Thank you.” She leaned forward and hugged him.
He seemed startled to be in her embrace, and sat there awkwardly. As she gently continued to cry, he put his arms around her and began to soothe her. They stayed like that a long time, until tiredness overcame them and they lay back on the bed and fell asleep.
Chapter twenty-seven
The dawn chorus of birds woke Anna. She opened her eyes and saw the morning light shining through the net curtains. The fire was nowsmouldering ashes. She looked around and saw Seán fast asleep beside her and the memories of the night came back to her. What had happened between them? The drinking in the town, followed by the poteen, mixed with her anguish and his sweet caring nature had brought them together. And as she stepped out of the bed, leaving his naked form behind her, she didn’t regret it. It was like for one night she had been somebody else. She hadn’t been Lady Anna Armstrong with all that entailed. She put on her garments and pulled back her hair into a bun. She walked across to the front door and opened it and stepped outside. She got a surprise when she looked around. Seán’s cottage was nestled into a hill looking down on the most breathtaking view of the lake. In the nearby woods, the birds were a chorus of different voices.
Anna judged it was aboutseven in the morning, and the air was crisply cold but so fresh. She stood there, being part of this scene, for a long while.
“You’re up early,” a voice suddenly came from behind her.
She turned around and saw Seán there, dressed in breeches and shirt, looking very sheepish.
“The birds woke me,” she said.
She went over to him and they hugged tightly for along while, wordlessly.
“It’s time you were getting home,” he said.
She nodded.
As he drove the cart through the estate, neither of them mentioned what had happened between them the previous night. It was as if there was an unspoken covenant between them that needed no explanation or apology.
He stopped the cart in a stand of trees some distance from the house.
“Will you be alright from here?” he said. “It’s best I don’t land up with you in a pony and cart.”
She nodded. “I’ll creep up to the house and sneak in,” she said, hoping nobody would spot her dressed the way she was.
“Maybe the first opportunity I get, I’ll go for a transfer from my duties with you,” said Seán. “Something away from the Big House – from you.”
Anna nodded. “It would be for the best.”
“Goodbye, Anna,” he said.
“Goodbye, Seán.”
She got down from the cart and set out towards the house, hiding the black shawl again under her cloak. When she came closer to the house, she slowed her pace and approached the house as if she were coming back from a morning stroll. To her relief she found the door unlocked.
She hurried across the foyer and up the stairs to the safety of her room. She locked the door behind her. She hid her face in her hands as she leaned against the door, thinking about everything that had happened. She moved over to the giant mirror over the fireplace and examined the bruise coming up on her cheek from the woman’s blow.
Taking a poker, she quickly stoked up the fire in the hearth and threw some wood on it, watching it turn into a blaze. Then she quickly got out of the dress and other clothes and threw them on top of the fire. Taking the poker again she pushed them into the flames and watched them burn into extinction.
Chapter twenty-eight
Barton poured coffee into Anna’s china cup.
“Will there be anything else, my lady?” he enquired.
“No, thank you, Barton,” answered Anna.
“And are you really sure you don’t need treatment for that nasty bruise, my lady?”
“I am, Barton,” said Anna firmly.
Barton cleared away her breakfast plate and left.
A minute later Georgina came rushing into the dining room.
“Anna! Where have you been?” she demanded. “I’ve been worried sick!”
“I only got back this past hour.”
“Why didn’t you immediately come and find me?” Georgina was incredulous as she sat down beside her. “I waited for you at the inn until well after twelve. And you never came as we had arranged. In the end I had to leave in fear of my life. There was a full-scale riot going on!”
“I know. I was caught up in it.”
Georgina saw the bruise on Anna’s face. “Oh, Anna! What happened to you?”
“A woman struck me during the fight. But I’ve told Barton I fell over the root of a tree this morning when out for a morning stroll.”
“Oh, Anna! When I think of the danger you were in! I was so worried about you. I didn’t know what to do. I knew I dare not tell anyone that you were missing in the town but I thought anything could have happened to you.”
“Anything nearly did happen to me. Only Seán found me and rescued me.”
“Seán! What was he doing there?”
Anna took a deep breath and said, “I no longer wish to discuss the whole unfortunate affair, Georgina.”
Georgina leaned forward and spoke conspiringly. “Did you manage to find anybody? Did you go with anybody?”
“As I said Georgina, the subject is closed. I very much regret ever going to the fair. I regret a lot of things.”
“But what about our plan?”
“Our scheme, you mean? Our scheme of deception and folly? Our scheme nearly led to my being killed, and to subsequent great shame being brought on my family and the house of Armstrong.”
Georgina looked at Anna in disgust. “So you are giving up then? You are standing aside and letting everything go to Sinclair and his wife and son?”
“I no longer care about these matters, Georgina. I feel as if I have been living this past long while in a haze, something that’s not real. I feel my desperation for a child has stopped me from looking at life logically. If the estate and title passes through to Sinclair and his son, then that is how fate intends it. If I and Edward are to remain childless, then I accept it, and so will Edward in time.”
“Are you so sure he will?” Georgina asked angrily.
“What choice do we have? I refuse to go along with this plan of yours anymore. From now on I will concentrate on making my husband happy in whatever way I can, and trying to make sure I am happy as well . . . in whatever way I can.”
“But you’ve already said you can’t be happy the way you are!” Georgina’s frustration was bubbling.
“Georgina! Georgina, I love you dearly, but I think it’s time you returned to Tullydere.”
“So now I’m to be dismissed!”
“I’m afraid I can’t allow myself to listen to your vehemence and bitterness anymore. You’ve changed so much since your engagement was called off, Georgina. You’ve allowed yourself to become so cynical a
nd unpleasant. All you care about is winning. It no longer matters if what is done is honourable and decent, as long as nothing stands in your way. And you have made me like that too these past few months.”
“Life has made you like that!” Georgina’s anger erupted.
“Regardless, I don’t think we are good company for each other at the moment . . . You’ll always be welcome here, but maybe leave it some time before your next visit. There’s a lot I need to fix, in my head and my life. And I don’t need your counsel to deter me.”
“I will leave on the mail coach this afternoon.”
Georgina turned and walked quickly from the room.
Chapter twenty-nine
Anna sat anxiously waiting for Edward at the drawing-room window, sewing. She could not wait to see him, and had been counting the hours until he arrived home from Dublin. Finally she saw his carriage pull up outside the house. She threw down her sewing, raced out through the hall to the front door, swung the door open and ran down the steps. As Edward stepped down from the carriage, she flung her arms around him and kissed him.
“Such a welcome!” he said kissing her back.
“I never want you to leave me again. Not for a single night!” she said.
“Then I won’t,” he promised.
In the library, Edward sat at his desk opening letters while Anna lay out on the couch in front of the fire reading a book.
“More bills!” complained Edward as he threw another piece of correspondence on top of the others.
“Do they ever stop?” asked Anna, not looking up from her book.
“Unfortunately not . . .And the head groom has left. He’s emigrating to America – to make his fortune!” Edward smiled sceptically.
Anna casually looked up from her reading. “Why don’t you consider Seán for the post?”
“Seán?” Edward looked at her, surprised.
“You’ve always said he’s excellent with horses, and full of confidence.”
“He does have the right qualities. But won’t you need him?”
“Not really. He was useful when I first came here, as I didn’t know my way around. But it’s my home now, and he’s outlived his usefulness.”
“Well, if you’re sure.Though I’ll miss him around the house, I’m kind of used to him,” mused Edward.
“It wouldn’t be fair to keep him back from an opportunity because of that,” nodded Anna with a smile.
After a while, Anna stopped trying to concentrate on her book and gazed into the fire.
Chapter thirty
“I have some rather wonderful news for you, Lady Armstrong. You are expecting a baby,” said Doctor Cantwell,the local doctor.
Anna’s hands shot up to cover her mouth in excitement and disbelief.
“Are you sure?” she demanded.
“As sure as I can be.” He was amused by her reaction, but delighted with the news. The non-arrival of an heir at Armstrongs’ had been the talk of the county and beyond. Lord and Lady Armstrong were such nice people, they deservedthis, he thought.
Anna ran through the house from room to room, eventually storming into the library, startling Edward.
“Good heavens, what’sthe matter with you, Anna?” he asked, looking up from his desk.
“A baby! Edward . . . we’re expecting a baby!”
Edward sat motionless, staring at her, with his mouth open.
Slowly he rose from his chair. He then rushed to her and grabbed her tightly.
“Anna . . . I’d given up hope. I’d really given up all hope!” He pulled back from her, staring at her.
She wiped away his tears. “Are you happy?”
“You’ve made me the happiest man in the world.”
Anna was astounded with the whole outpouring of goodwill shown to her and Edward with the announcement of the pregnancy. They were inundated with letters from friends and acquaintances from across Ireland and Britain offering congratulations. It was like it had been a given that there would be no direct heir to the mighty Armstrong estate and family, and now this news brought unexpected joy. Anna made sure to answer each and every letter directly.
There was one exception in the chorus of congratulations. Sinclair and Diana had not offered any and had pointedly stayed out of her way. Anna could only imagine their fury and disappointment at being displaced as heirs. She had tried to discuss the matter with Edward but he had been dismissive of the idea that Sinclair would be anything less than happy at the news.
One afternoon Anna was sitting at the desk in the parlour writing her thank-you notes when Barton entered.
“Pardon me, there is somebody requesting to see you,” said Barton.
“Yes, who is it, Barton?” she said, not looking up from her writing.
“Seán Hegarty.”
She looked up, startled. “Seán?”
“Yes, your former manservant.”
“I know who he is, but what does he want?”
“He wouldn’t say, apart from that it was of great urgency,” Barton said.
“Where is he now?”
“Waiting in the kitchen.”
“I’m afraid I can’t possibly see him, Barton. Just inform him I’m entertaining guests and am not available.”
“Very good, ma’am.” Barton nodded and went to exit.
“Oh, and Barton . . . if he comes to the house again, don’t let him in. He no longer works here and so has no business being here.”
“As you wish, Lady Anna.” Bartonwent out and closed the door after him.
Anna realised her heart was pounding fast. Why on earth did Seán want to see her? She had banished all thoughts of him from her head since he had left, and decided to continue to refuse to think about him. But as she tried to return to writing her thank-you letters, it was hard for her to concentrate.
Chapter thirty-one
Since she had become pregnant, Edward had a permanent smile on his face. His natural good nature had returned. Gone was the nagging distress he had endured when they were heirless, and Anna and he had the marriage she had always envisaged. So it was unusual to see the stress return to his face one afternoon in the summer, after returning from a trip around the estate.
The summer had been very wet and warm, and Anna was finding it tiresome. She couldn’t often go out for a walk because of the rain, and yet there was a humid feel inside the house.
“Is everything all right?” she asked as he came into the drawing room, fanning herself.
“I’m not so sure. The potato crop has failed on a number of the tenant farms on the estate.”
She looked up, concerned. She was well aware of how the tenants had become reliant on the potato for food, and in turn how their rents were reliant on the potato as well.
“What do you mean – failed?”
“The crops are rotten. There’s no yield. You can’t eat them.”
Anna put down her embroidery. “And how many farms are affected?”
“I’m not sure yet. Sinclair and his men have set off on a tour of the entire estate to gaugethe magnitude of the problem.” Edward went over and poured himself a glass of wine from a crystal decanter and downed it in one.
Sinclair arrived at the house that night. He came straight into the drawing room where Anna and Edward were waiting.
He went over and poured himself a whiskey. His sense of entitlement and familiarity still managed to annoy Anna, even though it didn’t have the same impact anymore as she fervently believed her baby would be a boy and Sinclair would never be master of her house.
“Well?” demanded Edward.
“It’s all over the estate. The crop has failed considerably.”
“It’s what we all feared. There’s been a blight in Europe, in Belgium and the south of England during the summer. I feared it would arrive here.” Edward sat down, looking despondent.
“But how will the tenants eat?” asked Anna.
“Never mind how will they eat, how will they pay their rents?” snapped Sincl
air. “I’ve sent messengers to the Foxes and the other neighbouring estates to see if they are affected as well. To see exactly what we are dealing with.”
They found out quickly that the blight had affected the farmers in the neighbouring estates and beyond. And it soon became clear how extensive the blight was. It was widespread across the country.
“We’ve had the crops fail before.” Edward tried to be optimistic. “There’s terrible hardship that year, but the next year things come right.”
“But what do we do for the present? This year?” demanded Sinclair.
Edward pondered a while, then said, “Evict none of the tenants. Allow them to go into arrears. They can catch up next year.”
“If the rents are allowed to go into arrears then the estate’s mortgage will go into arrears!” Sinclair had argued. “You might not find the banks so kind in their dealings with you as you are with your tenants!”
“And who will we get to replace the tenants if we evict them all? This blight has meant there are no other farmers with money able to come in and take their place,” Edward pointed out.
Anna soon knew her husband was speaking the truth as letters offering congratulations over her pregnancy were replaced with letters from friends who owned other great estates, expressing how difficult things were and how hard it was to see the tenants go hungry. Like Edward, everyone was hoping that the following year’s crop would be a success and that the year’s hardship would soon be over. The people could endure that year. Most had some food, some resources to get them by through the winter until the following spring.
But as the summer was left behind and the winter arrived, it was the hardest and cruellest winter people could remember. The people, already weary from lack of food and resources, suffered the severe weather in the desperate hope that the following year would be better.