by Molly Tanzer
The final piece of the Calipash puzzle, “Damnatio Memoriae,” is also largely extrapolated, though hints as to what really happened during that blighted mission to build a lighthouse across the channel from Portus Itius appear in Unaussprechlichen Kulten, or Nameless Cults. In particular, there is mention of a “Queen Barbara,” of whom it was said bravely slew some sort of winged horror, and of her consort, a once-famous warrior by the name of Spurius Calipash, who became outcast for abandoning Rome and living as a barbarian. Additionally, comparisons between the Germanic peoples and a tribe of rather unusual Britons that seem to have died out during Caligula’s reign exist in a variant copy of Tacitus’ Germania I was able to obtain via interlibrary loan from Colorado State University (many thanks to a certain good friend and scholar at CU who facilitated this, and several other research-related coup d’états). This helped flesh out The Thing’s tribe; Petronius’ character I have extrapolated from the tone of his only work, The History of Sicily, which was part of Oliver’s collection. The rest is my own.
There are, of course, other generations of Calipash twins who do not appear in this collection; thoroughly researching this family will be the work of a lifetime. Despite its omissions, inaccuracies, and depravity, I hope A Pretty Mouth is as enjoyable to read as it was to research and write. It is truly a pleasure to be able to finally present this work to the general public.
***
I would like to thank the following people for their help with A Pretty Mouth, be it encouraging me during the writing process, reading or editing the manuscript, advising or believing in me, or inspiring various parts of it: My supportive, wise, and hunky dreamboat of a husband John Gove, my personal cheerleading squad (and hunky dreamboat friend) Jesse Bullington, my tolerant, brilliant BFF Raechel Dumas, Cameron Pierce, Nick Mamatas, Cameron McClure, Livia Llewellyn, J.T. Glover, Brooke Ehrlich, Alan M. Clark and Gina Guadagnino, Silvia Moreno-Garcia and Ross E. Lockhart, Michael Nyman, Sarah Grand, the fine folk at Folsom Street Coffee, H. P. Lovecraft, Candace Ward, P. G. Wodehouse, Kirsten Alene Pierce, and, of course, my parents.
About the Author
Molly Tanzer lives in Boulder, Colorado along the front range of the Mountains of Madness, or maybe just the Flatirons. She is a freelance writer and editor by trade, and also works as the administrative overlord for Clockpunk Studios, and as the assistant to the publisher at Prime Books. Her work has appeared in, among other venues, The Book of Cthulhu (Volumes 1 and 2), Future Lovecraft, and Running with the Pack, and is forthcoming in Fungi and The Starry Wisdom Library. She blogs—infrequently—about hiking, vegan cooking, movies, and other stuff at http://mollytanzer.com, and tweets as @molly_the_tanz.
LAZY FASCIST 2012
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Table of Contents
A PRETTY MOUTH
A Spotted Trouble At Dolor-on-the-Downs
The Hour of the Tortoise
The Infernal History of the Ivybridge Twins
I.
II.
III.
IV.
A PRETTY MOUTH
Chapter One: Against Devotion
Chapter Two: Upon Receiving a Warning
Chapter Three: Here The Deities Disapprove
Chapter Four: My Lord All-Shame
Chapter Five: I Will Not Change, As Others Might
Chapter Six: This Will the Substance; He the Shadow Be
Chapter Seven: An Unheroic Exchange
Chapter Eight: Not All Souls Beauty Know
Chapter Nine: The Learned are the Least Devout
Chapter Ten: The Wanton Shepherd
Chapter Eleven: Art Can Indeed Seem Much Like Love
Chapter Twelve: The Able Debauchee
Chapter Thirteen: An Empty Source of Solid Harms
Chapter Fourteen: A History of the Unfortunate
Epilogue: Just Like Henry
Damnatio Memoriae
Author’s Note
About the Author
LAZY FASCIST 2012
COMING IN 2013