by Sylvia Ryan
She was an experience, not a woman.
She was blown away.
For a second, he stopped the relentless plying of her clit, and she came back to herself, back to the moment, to the clothing store.
Then, she felt the sensation of his cock resting at her opening.
Oh God. She wanted him to push into her hard, to take her, to own her. The anticipation was unbearable as his fingers still pumped her ass, and his cock rested snug against her opening.
“Please. Please fuck me,” she begged. She tried to shift her hips closer to him.
Luke chuckled and then took his erection away.
Grace groaned at the loss, and the thwap of Luke’s palm hitting her ass again followed.
“Be a good girl, ladybug,” Luke warned. “Remember, you come when I say, not before.” The full length of his cock slid into her, slowly splitting her open to him.
Vulnerable. She was one hundred percent vulnerable to his every whim. It shouldn’t be so good. Grace felt her throat tighten, and tears filled her eyes. She should be scared or guilty that she’d just added another man to the problems she already had. But she wasn’t.
Yes. This was it. She needed this.
As Luke pumped into her, Grace squeezed her thighs together and canted her hips in an effort to get more, and she did. The sweet, rough texture of the upholstery abraded her clit.
“Don’t do it. Not yet,” Luke warned again.
But it was already too late. Grace’s inner muscles gripped him hard and spasmed all around him. Her orgasm brought his hard and fast. Both of their bodies tensed and released together in complete silence. So good. It was so good.
Grace got some internal satisfaction from her defiance. She had controlled that climax, even when tied.
“You’ll be sorry for that decision, my dear,” he whispered in her ear. “No sex for you for a week.”
It was like he could read her mind. It was starting to get a little disconcerting, so she tried to give him a little of that feeling right back. “You’re not the only cock in town.”
He chuckled then gently untied her wrists and ankles and helped Grace vertical again. “We’ll see.” He took her in his arms and sat in the chair, holding her against him until she didn’t feel shaky anymore. When she was ready, he pulled a T-shirt from the rack and handed it to her. “Here, to clean up a little.”
They got dressed quickly and hustled back through the Radio Shack bathroom and out of the store minutes later.
* * * *
Luke was a spectator to the tense silent treatment in the shelter that continued for days. Grace was still angry with both Sarge and Van and didn’t even look at them. Despite that, three pairs of eyes followed her every move.
She was not the only one holding a grudge. Van and Sarge were obviously at odds with each other. Both men were angry at him, probably because he was the only person Grace talked to. And even though nothing had happened between them since their bondage in the boutique, he was the only person she slept in the bed with. The other nights, she slept sitting in a chair or on one of the inflatable pool mattresses. It was a stressful mess.
Luke frequently avoided the other two men by escaping to the garage for solitude. He received frequent visits from Grace while passing the time there. They talked a lot during their hours together sitting on the cool cement floor, and Luke spent a lot of time practicing the casual conversation therapy he’d perfected at the bar. She needed it, and as the days, hours, and minutes limped slowly by, Luke got to know Grace’s thoughts and feelings so intimately that he was sure she had never let anybody else get that close to the inner workings of her brain before. Of course, he knew the right questions to ask and the best presentation of those questions, so as not to spook her.
The woman behind that soft-spoken voice and hard-ass attitude was incredibly complex. She was hypersensitive about her character differences from other, what she called normal, women. In her mind, she was lesser than them somehow. She thought she was missing a key ingredient, some kind of femininity factor, and in her view, that omission ultimately made her unattractive to men.
Luke discovered that, even as an adult, Grace reeled from the abandonment of her mother and that Ethan had raised her more like a boy than a girl. She was well versed and capable of keeping herself safe in a variety of dangerous situations. She listened more than she spoke. She was hyperaware of people and circumstances around her. She was slow to trust others and was not a follower.
He’d learned about the one and only time she’d been in love. How this Steve guy had opened up something inside her, a beautiful gift, then broke it.
Before the EMP, Grace had filled everyday to overflowing, barely leaving enough time for sleep in an effort to consume the empty places in her life. She’d convinced herself that she didn’t need anyone. She could do everything by herself, and she’d developed a calm acceptance of it all.
One afternoon, she was near tears when they finally touched on the subject of Sarge and Van.
“I’ve always been terrible at the relationship thing,” she told him. “This whole situation, all the animosity, it’s my fault.” She sniffed and looked away from him with a vague look of shame on her face. “After the EMP, I went on a fucking binge. It’s out of character for me.”
“Fucking binge?”
She nodded. “Yeah. I was so weak and needy, especially those first few days. I slept with Sarge, then I slept with Van—then you a while later. I just couldn’t say no. Didn’t want to say no. Great time for my slut side to emerge, huh,” she said with a sarcastic snort and tears welling in her eyes.
“Really, Grace? Come on. Take a step back and look at this objectively. First of all, two…or three men”—he waggled his eyebrows—“does not a slut make. You should never feel bad about needing a man’s touch, especially when the world as you know it is falling down around you. It means you’re human. And, I think you did a pretty good job of being up front with everybody about your view on relationships. Don’t beat yourself up.”
They visited with each other through the hot afternoons. The words continued to ballet dance out of Grace’s mouth, painting a portrait of her entire being, both inside and out. They became friends, and that was something, he realized, they both desperately needed.
After almost a week of talking, listening, and learning, Luke wanted to fix the relationships between Grace and the other two men. Not because he was magnanimous, because he liked having her all to himself, but because it would make her happy. He knew how to fix the cold war that had divided and conquered all the shelter’s inhabitants. Now he’d try to pull a Gorbachev and tear down that wall. He just wasn’t sure if the others would cooperate.
Luke made his proposal the next day while Grace napped in Sarge’s bedroom. It was the first time since he had the idea that they were together, free to talk with one another without being overheard or interrupted by her. The animosity between the men vibrated in the air, made it a heavy and uncomfortable space to occupy.
Sarge protested, “I don’t see what this meeting is going to accomplish, because I don’t plan on handing Grace over to either one of you, and I’m betting that neither one of you is willing to either.”
“She’s not yours to hand over,” Van cut in. “Let’s get to the point, if there is one.”
Luke tried to settle his flaring anger. “The point is that if this selfish bullshit continues, I’m going to lose my fucking mind. I think it’s pretty much a given that we all have feelings for her.” He looked to the other two men. “So, if we care about her at all, we would want her to be happy. She told me she could have been happy just being herself and letting things progress naturally, maybe with all three of us holding a piece of her heart, even though right now she wouldn’t admit that fact to either one of you. Maybe it would have worked, but you guys started getting possessive and beating your chests over her like gorillas. Now she’s avoiding you two, she’s miserable, and the te
nsion is only going to increase to the point that something will eventually happen to make the situation even worse. We’re grown men. It’s time we started acting like it.”
Luke sighed. “I would be willing to share her if the alternative is not having her at all.” He held up his hand to stop the comments that were forming on Sarge and Van’s lips. “She’s been straightforward with everybody from the very beginning, but no one gave her the same courtesy. We heard her words, but still decided we knew better. All this macho bullshit has to end.
“Our focus should be on how to survive through the winter, not battling for her. It’s time we accept her for who she is. She’s not a traditional woman. She’ll never fit into the role you two are trying to jam her into. And to be honest with you guys, I don’t think I want her any different from the way she is right now.” Luke’s anger flared at the impassive faces of the other two men.
Stubborn assholes.
He raked his fingers through his hair in aggravation. “She can’t choose just one of us because none of us alone can give her everything she needs.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Sarge grunted.
“There are parts of us that she loves, but none of us contains all the parts that make her want to be with that man only for the long term. Plus, she’s so afraid of hurting us, even if she had a preference, I don’t think she would say so.”
“And you know this how?” Van asked.
“We’ve spent a lot of time talking this week.”
“So, now we know she won’t choose any of us,” Van grumbled.
“We’ve known that all along, dumbass,” Luke said. “That’s the problem. Nobody listens, really listens to her. Somehow her feelings, that she’s been very up front about, by the way, have been totally disregarded. We think we know what’s better for her than she does. And all that behavior does is illustrate how much we don’t listen to a word she says, and in her mind, how much we want to change her into someone she isn’t. She’s told us what she wants. I believe her words to me were something like…I’ll have sex with who I want, when I want.” Luke looked at the other two men. “Am I right?”
“Yeah,” Sarge mumbled.
“So, do you guys agree we need to make some changes? Try to make things right?”
“That depends on what you have in mind,” Sarge shot back.
“Okay, fair enough. I have a two-part plan. First let’s give all of us some time to gain some perspective, learn how to get along. All of us just learning to live with each other in peace, having conversations, being civil. No competition. No sniping. Show her that we’re not planning on ripping each other’s throats out any time soon. Then after that, we can see if she can handle the choices she’s made for herself, and us.”
“Meaning?” Sarge rumbled.
“We’ll give her exactly what she says she wants—all three of us.” Luke flashed a wicked grin.
“At the same time?” Van asked. His eyes were wide as if he couldn’t believe what Luke was saying.
Luke nodded. “At the same time.”
“Hell no! I don’t fucking think so,” he spat back.
Silence sat between the men, but it was a different kind of silence than Luke had felt between them during the past days. It was a subdued, brooding lull.
Sarge’s expression indicated that he was still digesting the idea. Then he looked at Luke and smiled. “I like it.”
Chapter 19
Grace’s habit of waking before the men was convenient when she’d needed to sneak out, but it got old fast when she was up before the sun because she’d slept in a chair all night. She took advantage of her unfortunate sleep schedule and asked Luke to keep watch for her in the afternoon while she slept alone in Sarge’s queen-size bed.
She relished the block of time that was her chance for privacy and peace. There were no eyes following her. There was no tension, no testosterone hanging heavily in the air, no guilt for being the source of misery for other human beings. Today, Grace brought a small container of water and a washrag to Sarge’s room. She shut herself in and bathed in private. The sun seemed brilliant through the closed blinds on the windows. She looked around the thoroughly masculine bedroom. It had black walls, a black leather headboard, and a mattress with crisp white sheets.
It was truly a luxury to crawl between the sheets of the huge bed, alone and with a clean body. But even though she was tired, sleep wouldn’t come. Her thoughts crowded her head, and as always, they were all about the men. Luke’s nonchalant attitude and honest communication during the time she spent with him in the garage was a breath of fresh air compared to the seriously tense atmosphere that dominated the shelter.
It was ironic, really, that his words, along with the sex during their outing, had blown her away. He was smart and funny. He was a good friend to her. Luke had turned out to be more compatible with her than the other two men. She considered asking him to return to her own shelter with her, but she couldn’t do it. It wouldn’t be right, because she was in love with Sarge, even though he drove her crazy with his he-man controlling bullshit. And, if she was going to be straight with herself, she would have to admit the attraction she felt toward Van’s easy, approachable disposition, sweet words, and soft caresses. She had feelings for all three of them, and it wouldn’t be fair to Luke if she was pining over the two men she left behind.
She had created an untenable situation. The interpersonal dynamics within the shelter were a disaster because of her. The atmosphere was draped with unbearable silence and animosity. It was impossibly hard to not worry about what the constant stress and hostility was doing to them and what the men thought about her because of it. She didn’t like it. She felt hurt and guilty and sad. She had played with fire and destroyed the whole shelter in the inferno she’d caused.
Her efforts to keep to herself in the last week might have improved the situation a bit. It seemed like the issues between the men were better. There was noticeably less tension between all involved, and they had started talking with each other again.
Grace lay in Sarge’s bed and realized that as long as she was there, it wasn’t going to get any better. And even though things seemed to have eased a little bit, it was only a matter of time before something happened and they were back to the toxic soup of ego and emotions that consumed them, ate them all up like a cancer, slowly and painfully.
She was the problem, and she knew what she had to do to make it right.
It was time for her to leave. It was time to go home.
A plan of how to leave without the men coming to look for her at her shelter flitted through her mind while her body started to relax. As she tried to drift off to sleep, the thought that this would be the last day she’d be with them came as a crushing blow. She would miss them so, so much. A hollow ache in her chest settled in, and she held back the urge to cry. She loved them. She loved them all enough to do what was right for them.
She was on the brink of sleep when she startled awake to find Sarge, Van, and Luke surrounding the bed. They were all in various states of undress, well on their way to totally nude.
“Take your clothes off, Grace,” Sarge commanded as he crossed to the trunk by the bed.
She scanned all three men. “Very funny, guys,” Grace blurted as she got up and headed toward the door. She tried to push past Luke and Van to leave, but failed.
Grace looked at the two men. Their expressions were stern and didn’t give anything away.
“It’s not a joke, Grace,” Van said. His green eyes were like a wolf’s, beautiful and predatory.
Luke stepped forward and ran his hand over her shoulder and then down her arm. In a barely-there whisper next to her ear, he said, “You know you want this, ladybug. It’s what you need.” His expression as he drew away from her was saturated with intimacy and encouragement. It prompted a flutter in her stomach. He had orchestrated this, and he’d done it unselfishly, giving up the monopoly he had on her time so she coul
d be happy.
“Take them off.” Sarge’s gravelly demand came from behind her. She turned toward him. He stood next to the headboard, handcuffs dangling from his grip. “Do it, or I’m going to do it for you.” Sarge’s words triggered the flow of warm moisture in her cunt.
She had missed him, had missed his touch. Luke was right. She needed this. She straightened her spine and took a deep breath. She could do this.
It took her mere seconds to shed her clothes and stand breathless and naked in front of them. She faced Van and Luke, and a blush of embarrassment heated her cheeks. She felt awkward and on display standing naked in front of them as their blazing eyes traced over her skin, exploring every part of her in the light of day. A rough chuckle came from over her shoulder, and then Sarge’s firm grasp of her arm and the click, click from a cuff closing around her wrist quickened her heart.
She was filled with feelings of excitement and fear when Sarge traced his finger down her spine and then in between the cheeks of her butt. “Come with me.” He led her to the bed and clicked the other half of the cuffs to the post at the corner. “Lay on the bed.”
Grace followed Sarge’s direction and lay down with her cuffed wrist, spreading her arm wide away from her. Her belly flip-flopped as Sarge walked around the bed. He grabbed her ankles and flipped her over, pulling her toward him until she was lying on her stomach diagonally across the bed with the cuffed arm over her head.
Luke approached her and knelt on the floor next to the bed. “You can stop this any time, ladybug.” His whisper in her ear raised goose bumps on her arms and tightened her nipples. “‘Red.’ That’s all you have to say to make us stop.” He leaned in close, and the air from his hot breath teased her just as much as his words. “But if you say it, it will prove that you can’t handle what you say you want.”
Grace turned her head toward him. “Not likely.” Her eyes challenged the men as she met each one’s gaze one by one. A slow smile curved her lips. “Bring it.”