by Leela Ash
“How are things with you?” Jax asked her, grinning. It had been a while since he had had a conversation with anybody but Layne, and he hadn’t realized how much he missed his friend.
“Pretty much the same, except I broke up with Kelsey,” she said with a frown.
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. You guys were doing so well last I heard,” Jax said, sincerely saddened.
“Yeah well, some people just are not compatible after a long amount of time,” she said with a shrug. Jax pursed his lips and silently hoped to himself that he and Layne would be exempted from this category.
“So how have you been staying busy?” he asked her.
“Actually, I have a new girlfriend now,” she said with a sly grin. “It’s someone I’ve had my eye on for a long time. Maybe you’ll remember her.”
“No way, you don’t mean Sam do you?”
Tobi bit her bottom lip, smiling and nodding proudly.
“I can’t believe that, it’s perfect,” Jax said, running his hands through his dark hair in relief. His mind fixed on the image of the no-nonsense woman with the caramel colored skin and deep brown eyes. She had been Tobi’s crush ever since she laid eyes on her, but Sam had always been obsessed with scribbling medical journals and collecting herbs. She was far too busy for relationships. She was determined to keep her knowledge alive and apply it however she could.
“What’s perfect?” Tobi asked, puzzled.
“Sam was the doctor here right?”
“Well she’s one of them. They started to prefer one of the guys they kidnapped from this other brainy tribe further west. Sam’s amazing but they don’t think a black woman can do the job, even though she’s gotten them this far. But I guess the new guy is pretty good at what he does.”
“Do you think Sam would be able to tell if somebody was pregnant?”
“Oh no, Jax. You didn’t!” Tobi said shaking her head in horror.
“What do you mean?” he asked, shirking away from Tobi, suddenly feeling as if he had done something very wrong.
“Who the hell would want to have kids in a world like this?” Tobi asked, sighing and shaking her head more slowly. “Most guys around here pull out, you know.”
Jax suddenly found his cheeks burning hot with embarrassment and irritation. Whose business was it if he wanted to have a family? It wasn’t exactly the conventional time and place to raise a family, but he knew that it would be all right if they just worked a little harder to make ends meet. That was something that he was willing to do.
“Where is your poor girl?” Tobi asked with a heavy sigh.
“A few days from here, but I cut the time down by biking. She’s been sick, and I’m worried that if she’s not pregnant, it’s something else.”
“I don’t know if Sam and I can go that far,” Tobi said, furrowing her eyebrows.
“All I need is one examination. I can’t bring her this far. I don’t think it’s safe to travel if she isn’t feeling well.”
Tobi put her hand over her face and groaned.
“Okay, you know what? I’ll see what I can do, but it’s possible that Sam hates you just as much as the other people at Hex do. If she was tainted by Shark Tooth’s propaganda, then how are we supposed to trust that she won’t turn you in? And me too for that matter?”
“I know it’s risky, I’m sorry,” Jax sighed.
“It’s more than risky! I mean honestly, there would be something in it for her. She could be reinstated as one of the main doctors here. She took it pretty hard when they started using that other guy.”
“Maybe that just means that she’ll be willing to listen to someone else’s reasoning. What if she’s mad at Shark Tooth too?”
“That is also really possible,” Tobi said with a grin. Jax smiled and gave her a halfhearted shrug.
“Can you at least just talked to her for me? I mean you do hold some sway over her after all.”
“That’s only because I’m good in bed,” Tobi said with a wink, and Jax laughed. They waved at each other before she headed down the tree.
“I’ll try to get you an answer as quickly as possible, okay? But if you don’t like what you hear then you need to get back home to your girl. None of the doctors around here are trustworthy enough to help you. Especially not if you have a good thing going. Don’t try anybody else if this doesn’t work. Just hope for the best, okay? Don’t make me worry about you two.”
“All right,” Jax said with a nod. He would wait there until sunset, and find out for sure if he was able to find someone who could help Layne. But if Sam wouldn’t do it, at least he would know to head west to look for the group of brainiacs out that way.
CHAPTER FIVE
Layne looked around the town, her face drawn in sadness. She hated the ghostly feel of the deserted neighborhoods. She could always imagine what they would have been like when the residents were alive and happy, but those visions were quickly blurred away by the horrific side effects of the virus that had stricken them all down. Everybody was blindsided by the sickness, and when it first began nobody had a clue how devastating it would be.
Although she had survived, she had pangs of nausea whenever she thought about it. She could remember the way her family had suffered; the way they had begged for relief that they were unable to find. Death had seemed a mercy at that point.
What if her baby wasn’t immune? There were still traces of the virus all over the world. Even if everything were all sterilized, there were still groups of mournful, green-tinged carriers who had the weight of the world on their shoulders. They traveled in groups, many of them drinking and drugging themselves to death, unable to bear the guilt they felt from causing the collapse of civilization. Their minds circled with regrets. If only they hadn’t pulled the strings to be the first vaccinated. Now they were doomed to witness the destruction their immunity had caused for the rest of their lives.
If those bands of carriers ever passed through and touched the foods in the garden or coughed near them, they could find out the hard way that their child wasn’t immune. They would have to watch their baby suffer the way the rest of their families had suffered. It would be a fate worse than dying herself; to have a part of herself forced to succumb to the terrible illness.
She took a deep breath and headed into the first house that caught her eye. If she could find anything useful for a baby on the way so Jax wouldn’t have to keep leaving her, then she would do it. She didn’t want him to feel like he had to take care of her all the time. And if the baby wasn’t immune, there had to be some antibiotics around that would ease its suffering, if nothing else. A baby without immunity would be doomed to suffer. The people and cities were still infested; the virus wouldn’t go away that easily just because many people now were immune to the effects themselves.
When she walked into the house, she could tell that the people who had lived there had been happy. There were toys scattered on the floor and pictures of smiling faces; three children and two adults. She moved cautiously through the house, trying hard not to think about what had happened to the family or look at their pictures and belongings. She was there for one reason – to get supplies.
She began pushing doors open, looking for the bathroom. She would look for medical supplies first and foremost, and hope that there were still some left. At first, all she found were bedrooms, and then, to her dismay, a nursery. It had never been used. There were no pictures of babies; Layne gathered that the family had been expecting a new child.
Her eyes watered despite herself and she walked into the nursery, looking around and swallowing the lump in her throat as she touched the furniture. The baby had never gotten a chance to use all of this. The family was gone.
She would come back to root through the desolate little room later. Layne forced herself to leave the nursery and finally found the bathroom upstairs. She rummaged through the closets and cabinets, relieved to find that they had a little baby grooming kit. Thermometer, nail clippers, a fuzzy little brush
all sealed in a hard plastic container beside a first aid kit that had a fuzzy white film over it. She passed over the first aid kit, careful not to touch it, and grabbed the plastic box of grooming supplies. And as she suspected, there were unfinished bottles of antibiotics, meant to preserve at least some semblance of dignity to the people who were diagnosed with the contagion. She grabbed the supplies and walked out of the bathroom numbly, closing the door behind her.
Layne felt dizzy all of a sudden; numb and scared. Her heart thudded and a familiar surge of nausea nearly brought her to her knees. She tried to hold it back but she couldn’t, and ran into the bathroom to unleash it into the toilet. She would have to rest for a little while. Her night on the ground hadn’t left her feeling particularly refreshed.
Layne didn’t want to be in the pleasant house full of promise and love. She didn’t want reminders of why she was there in the first place. If she was pregnant and not sick, why had she found such a place? Somewhere that reminded her of all the joy and love she would be missing out on if the virus stole her child?
She stumbled back down the hall to the nursery and sat down in the rocking chair beside the little crib, hugging her knees to her chest and allowing herself to cry bitterly. She succumbed to a flood of tears she felt like she had been holding back since the beginning of the end of civilization. She wept for the families who were killed by the virus, and for her own family; for Jax and for herself and their potential child.
She leaned her head back against the headrest of the rocking chair and exhaled out loud, closing her eyes and letting her weary body tug her into a deep sleep.
***
“Good news, Jax,” Tobi said, bounding up the tree. It was late afternoon and he had been waiting in the tree for a little over two hours. “Sam can’t stand Shark Tooth and wouldn’t care if we took off, just the two of us. So I casually introduced her to the idea of maybe helping you out. We’re going to try to do like you did, make it on our own you know? Start out with a trip to visit your little place. And we’ll have a head start. I told Shark Tooth I had some scavenging I wanted to do, just me and my lady. It’ll be a while before they realize we’re gone.”
She winked at Jax and he laughed, shaking his head in relief and disbelief.
“You mean she’ll make a house call for Layne?” Jax asked, his face lighting up.
“Yeah,” Tobi nodded. “She already packed up all her medical supplies. Whether your lady is sick or pregnant, Sam’s the best. She can help her. Though personally I’m hoping for the former, because that’s a lot easier to treat than 18 years with a kid who might drop dead just walking into the wrong area.”
“If Layne and I are both immune that shouldn’t be a problem,” Jax pointed out firmly. Tobi shrugged.
“We’ll see. I just don’t like the odds. It makes me glad I’m a lesbian. Not going to accidentally get knocked up and have to worry about that kind of shit, you know?”
“I guess so,” Jax said glumly.
But there was good news. Tobi had pulled through for him. He was suddenly patting himself on the back for dealing with Tobi’s incessant crush on Sam for so long. It had been persistent and mournful. At least, until she had met Kelsey and the two of them had stuck together like glue for the next few years. He wondered what could have driven a wedge between them; they had seemed so happy.
“Sam is going to meet us by the river. She already left so let’s get going. I told her it was kind of an emergency. I know it’s not like Layne’s dying or anything but you know, it’s better to get it checked out soon in case it is something serious. You’re not sick too are you?”
“Well…” Jax said, thinking back to the way he had thrown up after killing the two desperate wanderers. “I don’t think so.”
Tobi raised an eyebrow at him but said nothing. She turned away and headed as quickly as she could toward the river. She had remembered what Jax said and brought her own bike, which was risky, but Tobi was well known as a hard-ass around the area so she didn’t seem too concerned.
Jax followed along behind her. She never cut through the old neighborhood the way that he did; everybody in Hex had been told to avoid those places and they had become somewhat superstitious about it. That was how Jax knew that he was safe there and could always sleep soundly. They had looted the old buildings as much as they could and the only thing left there was nightmares.
They ran swiftly through the wooded area surrounding the neighborhood and Jax stayed as alert as possible. If anybody from Hex found out that Tobi was helping him, she could get into huge trouble. Fortunately, everybody seemed to be busy elsewhere, and they made it to the river in record time, where Sam was pacing in front of the water, a serene look on her face as she gazed into the trees.
“Hey,” Tobi said, running up to her.
“Hi,” Sam said with a smile. Jax wasn’t sure how it was possible but she somehow looked smarter, maybe older and more wizened, since the last time they’d seen each other.
“Hello,” Jax said, nodding at Sam.
“Long time no see,” Sam said with a smile.
“Yeah,” Jax said. “Thanks for agreeing to help me.”
“I’m mostly doing it for your girlfriend,” Sam said. “And mine. Besides, it’s not like you would have any clue what pregnant women go through.”
Jax frowned and Tobi laughed.
“Ease up, Sam,” she said. “Jax might have gotten her into this mess but he knows he will have to help her out as much as he can.”
“Well that’s why you brought me here,” Sam said, hoisting her bag over her shoulder. She had left it on the ground while she was waiting for them to show up, knowing it would conserve her energy. “Let’s go.”
Jax felt nervous about showing anybody the secret land that he and Layne had found and settled. Even though he trusted Tobi with his life, he still wasn’t sure about Sam.
“I don’t want you guys telling anybody about where we live, all right? We’ve worked really hard to set this place up for ourselves.”
“Don’t worry. We have our own lives to live,” Sam said.
“We’ll give you guys some beer, okay? Just to call it even. This stays between us. I mean it. I’ll do anything to protect my family.”
Jax fixed his dark, intense gaze on both Tobi and Sam, and they shifted uncomfortably, but nodded. They knew that he would kill them if he had a chance, if he knew that they had betrayed him.
“All right dude,” Tobi said. “But don’t blame us if somebody else ends up finding you. I won’t rat you out. Sam might, but I doubt it. I’d dump her if she did.”
Tobi winked at Sam, who gave her a comical frown. Jax tried to ease up about it. They had been able to leave early enough that they would only have to make camp once. Both Tobi and Sam were in excellent physical shape, and kept up with him as he pedaled wildly through the rocky terrain. He knew they would be there soon. He only hoped that Layne would be okay. She could make him feel better about the world simply by looking at him. She didn’t even have to say a word. Hopefully with Sam onboard, he would be able to return the favor.
CHAPTER SIX
When Layne woke up, the morning had passed swiftly and the sun of the late afternoon was shining through the nursery window. She felt refreshed after a rest and finally had the energy to explore the nursery in depth. It felt wrong to benefit from somebody else’s tragedy, but the world as it was had left her with no choice.
She began slowly, opening and closing drawers full of musty clothes. They probably wouldn’t be good to put a baby in, she realized. A lot of what was there wasn’t salvageable. She turned from the dresser and headed to the changing table, shocked to find several bags of sealed diapers and wipes that had never been used. She had hit the jackpot here, though she would only be able to carry a pack or two home.
The couple was stocked up, experienced enough to prepare for the worst before the new baby came. She wished she could use more, but unfortunately the house had become dilapidated and moldy, af
fecting the clothes and nearly everything else.
Just when she thought her trip had been mostly in vain, she opened the closet and gasped softly. A bag of vacuum-sealed baby clothes was hanging in the closet, clearly hand-me-downs from the older children. They were untouched by the elements, and beside the bag was a beautiful felt blanket, still wrapped in plastic and untouched.
Layne stuffed everything that she could into her bag and slowly unpacked the vacuum sealed bag, cherishing each little outfit as if it were the most precious thing on earth. She could still feel the life in the clothing, worn by children who had been free to play and enjoy their youth. That was what she wanted for her own child, and it was with that hope that she headed back out on the road.
She knew that she would have to hurry. Jax was efficient, and if he came home to an empty house, his worry would get the best of him. Her mind wandered to the last lingering kiss they’d shared, and she sighed wistfully. She hadn’t really expected to have sex with someone again; at least not good, consensual sex that hadn’t been initiated based on mutual need.
She’d had a few experiences on the road before meeting Jax. There had been one man she’d stumbled upon who she thought about from time to time. He had been standing naked under a tree, his lean, muscular body bronzed in the sunlight. A lot of people had been left naked and with nothing in the initial chaos, before the tribes had provided everybody with security. He had been unlucky, caught by a group while he was sleeping, probably. It was sad to see so many forlorn people on the road.
The second their eyes met she sensed in him the same, deep, primal longing that she’d had herself. She hadn’t seen another person in weeks, and it had been so long since she had been with a man that the sight of his virile body immediately aroused her. He didn’t approach her, and would have let her go on her way, but she saw the stiffening of his body as a result of her presence and hadn’t been able to help herself.