Yes, I needed to relax and quiet my mind.
A couple of hours later, I was tired of being poked on and having needles stuck in my arms. Dr. Stone had moved Reese and me into his office for a consultation. Reese was nervous and jittery knowing my moment of truth was getting closer. My goal of motherhood was becoming more of a reality.
“How are you holding up, Harper?” Reese asked, squeezing my hand. “I’m here for you, sweetie.”
“Thank you,” I said, pulling my body close to his and embracing his hug.
“Ms. Montgomery, aren’t you the lucky one?” Dr. Stone said.
“Oh yes I am, Dr. Stone. I came here to get informed. I can’t wait to proceed. I’m looking forward to this. I’m feeling really good about the prospects of being a mother,” I said, grabbing Reese’s hand and holding it tightly.
“Well, I’m glad to hear that, Ms. Montgomery, because you’re going to be getting your wish, indeed,” Dr. Stone said. “I’m so glad you have a positive outlook, because there’s something I need to tell you,” Dr. Stone smiled.
“Yes Dr. Stone.” I said. “I am very much looking forward to going through the fertility process.”
“You’re a very blessed woman. I have a million mothers that would love to walk in your shoes right now,” he said. “The fact of the matter is that my job is done. Mother nature has a way of laughing at people in my profession.”
“I’m sorry, Dr. Stone, I guess I’m not following you,” I said, a bit confused and squeezing Reese’s hand.
“Ms. Montgomery, you’re already pregnant. You don’t need the services of my clinic. You’re well under way into your first trimester,” Dr. Stone said. “The way I figure it, you’re right about six weeks along,” Dr. Stone beamed. “You should plan on giving birth early fall.”
Reese looked like he had seen a ghost and had turned pale white.
“I’m sorry Dr. Stone,” I said. “What do you mean, exactly?”
“I mean you’re going to have a baby, Ms. Montgomery. You don’t need my services,” he stood, shaking my hand. “But thank you again for considering my fertility clinic.”
I was flabbergasted. Floored.
“Although we can’t help you, we appreciate your potential business,” Dr. Stone said. “You need to start a treatment plan with your regular obstetrician and get on a regimen of pre-natal vitamins. I’ve checked you over. You’re in good health and should have no problem. I expect you to sail right through this pregnancy.” Another big smile from the good doctor.
My mouth was still hanging open as I watched Dr. Stone fold my medical folder closed. “Here’s my card, should your obstetrician need to speak with me directly. You’ll need to sign some exit papers and then I’ll have you on your way.”
And just like that, Dr. Stone ushered Reese and I out of his office. As we passed by an empty waiting room, I moved to grab a chair and sit down. I was feeling dizzy.
“I need to pause for a minute and collect my thoughts,” I said, feeling like my head was spinning.
“You’re pregnant? By Nicholas?” Reese said turning his head towards me in disbelief, not sure how to respond to me.
“I guess so,” I said in shock.
Reese moved to sit in the chair next to me.
“Congratulations, Harper.” He kissed me on my cheek. “This is good news, right?”
I was speechless.
“Those damn Bloody Marys in Vermont,” I said. “I’m shocked. Nicholas and I had marathon sex, no condoms. High on . . . the good life . . . and each other . . .”
I started getting up very slowly. I felt like I was walking out of Dr. Stone’s office in a daze and feeling like I had been hit by a sledgehammer.
“No wonder I had been feeling under the weather lately. I thought I was getting the flu or just running myself down from working too hard,” I said, walking towards the exit doors of the clinic slowly. I looked at Reese, in disbelief. I still couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I was going to have a baby. Nicholas’s baby.
“You’re going to be a mother, Harper. Just what you said you wanted. And you did it the old-fashioned way,” Reese said. “Shall we celebrate?”
“Oh my God, I’m pregnant,” I said. “I’m going to have a baby. Nicholas’s baby. Oh my God.”
Should I tell Nicholas? How would he handle this news? Would he stay or run like he did ten years ago? This was unbelievable news. I thought for sure once I went to the fertility clinic it would take several months to get pregnant. Maybe even a year. I wasn’t sure I was ready for this. This was soon. If Nicholas denied me and my baby this time, maybe I really was going to have to really kill him, once and for all.
“Oh Reese, what do I do?” I asked, feeling like my emotions had climbed up the top of a roller coaster and then slid downward at high speed and back up again.
“Do? I tell you what you are going to do. You have a baby, little momma,” Reese said, starting now to get excited. “I’m going to be a godfather,” he said, pumping his chest out, picking me up, and twirling me around.
“And I’m going to be a mother.”
Chapter Thirteen
Nicholas
“Nicky I know you’re feeling bad but you need to snap out of it,” Lucia scolded. “You’ve been moping now for a couple of weeks.”
“Frankly, if it weren’t for this Joduku Plastic’s acquisition being on my work schedule I’d head to the Mediterranean on the Julianna and not come back until this time next year,” I said, watching the snow fall silently out of my penthouse window.
“Harper’s been calling again today. Why don’t you take the call, Nicky? I’ve been making all kinds of excuses for you,” Lucia sighed. “I can’t do this too much longer. She’s smart enough to put two and two together.”
“What’s there to say? Everyone but me knows she’s pregnant—Big Daddy, Mackenzie, Reese, and even his sister Riley knows. Maybe it’s Reese’s baby. I hear he went to the fertility clinic with her.”
“Now you’re being ridiculous, Nicky,” Lucia said.
“Really? It’s not like Harper picked up the phone and told me that she was actually having a baby through some unidentified sperm donor,” I grumbled. “I thought she and I were working on re-building a future together and now she goes off and does this!”
“Honestly, Nicky,” Lucia interrupted.
“It’s like my feelings mean nothing to her. I mean nothing to her. She didn’t even give us a chance. She just can’t find it in her heart to let go of all of our old baggage.”
“Well, not talking to her isn’t going to help, Nicholas. Perhaps there’s a way for the two of you to build a bridge across these troubled waters. If you would just talk to her,” Lucia pleaded. “Avoiding Harper isn’t going to help this situation. It’s been two weeks now, Nicky.”
I stared out the window watching the snowflakes fall, never turning around to face Lucia. My heart was broken. My baby maker had gone off and made a baby without me. She truly didn’t want me. Perhaps her dislike for me was deeper than I thought. All I felt now was dread. Dread that I was really going to have to go forward and live my life without her. I didn’t want to take care of someone else’s baby when I was perfectly capable of making my own. Why didn’t she want my baby? Why didn’t she want me? She had to know this would be a deal breaker between us. I’ve never wanted any woman like I’ve wanted her. It hurt too much just to think about the loss of her. If I should lose this love, the pain would be too great.
“There is no situation Lucia,” I said turning to face Lucia and looking at her pitifully. “She’s made her choice.”
“You’re in love with Harper,” Lucia said. “You always have been. Love can overcome incredible odds, Nicky. For once, try to follow your heart on this one.”
I stared at Lucia, at a loss of words. My anger with Harper was mixed with my deep love for her. “I have been following my heart, Lucia. Harper needed to do the same. But no. No sir. What did she do? She went and got herself fucking kn
ocked up at some freaking fertility clinic,” I said. I knew my voice was revealing the deep agony and pain that I was feeling in my heart and soul.
I was a mess. Images of Harper and me making love haunted my brain like a bad memory on constant replay. Falling in love with Harper had created an ache in my heart as big as the Grand Canyon. My desire and need for her burned inside of me. How was I ever going to get myself through life without her? Why did I set myself up for failure a second time like an idiot?
I watched with disinterest as Lucia headed towards the fax machine to pull a document out of the feeder that was coming through.
“What is it?” I mumbled, swirling around in my chair to look back at the snow falling in Central Park. It was like a piece of heaven carved out in the middle of a Metropolis. How exactly did that come to be? So strange that we were in the month of March and snow was falling on Central Park. The climate was messed up with all this global warming madness. Just like my heart was messed up. Cold where it should have been warm.
“It’s about the Joduku Plastics acquisition. We’re on their agenda to make our presentation, Lucia said, reading the details of the agenda out loud.
“Fine,” I said. “Game on. Let’s acquire this fucking company for Becker Foods so I can get the hell out of Dodge,” I grumbled. “I prefer to be on the other side of the world right now rather than dealing with some little plastics company out of Tokyo for Big Daddy. I just want all this mess behind me. I want it all to go away,” I growled. “I need to go fucking play.”
I closed my eyes and breathed in deep. Lucia nodded at me in agreement in the way that she had mastered her communications with me, giving me a look of acquiescence.
“I suppose when Becker Foods wins this acquisition, then that will just be another nail that Harper can put in my coffin. Just one more reason for her to shut me out of her life. It was already bad enough that we were in competition with each, but now this. A baby,” I said, running my fingers through my hair.
“Nicky, you’ve taken this pity party way too far. It’s not like Harper’s not trying to reach out to you to communicate. She’s the one that has been working to reach out to you. And frankly, that’s more than I would have expected her to do given the fact that you’re constantly avoiding her. This does not have to go down this way,” Lucia said, her pleas starting to feel like nagging irritation.
Lucia’s phone buzzed. She was getting a text message. I looked at her expectantly.
“It’s Three. He wants an update on Joduku Plastics. He says Big Daddy wants a status report on the acquisition and you’re not returning his calls.”
“Handle it Lucia,” I said, grabbing an unopened bottle of Stoli off my wet bar. “Just handle it. Just fucking handle it, Lucia.”
“Nicky, you’re repeating yourself. Perhaps you need to get in the ring with Stephen for a bit. Work out some of your frustrations. Exercise is good for you,” Lucia begged.
“I’m going to bed,” I said, twisting the top off the bottle and taking a huge swig.
I felt the heat of the vodka warm my insides. I needed to feel something. I’d been numb for so long now. I could feel the warmth of the vodka slide down my esophagus. It meant I wasn’t dead yet. Too bad. I felt dead inside. Why wasn’t I dead yet? I needed to drink some more.
“The answer to your problems is not in that bottle you know,” Lucia said, looking at me with disdain.
“Who the hell cares,” I said, headed up the floating staircase to my master bedroom suite.
“I do,” she said.
“How long has he been like this?” I could hear Three say amidst the fogginess going on in my head.
“About three days now,” Lucia said. “He’s not eating but he sure as hell is drinking. He’s been binging on the Stoli’s ever since he got the news about the pregnancy,” Lucia said. “I’ve tried to get through to him, but he’s not listening to me right now. You’re welcome to have at it,” Lucia said. “The calls from Harper have even stopped, not that he’s been taking her calls anyway,” Lucia said.
“Lucia, he’s got to get his head back in the game or he won’t ever forgive himself. Not to mention that Big Daddy’s gonna have my ass right along with his. This is a replay from the last time Harper broke his heart,” Three said.
“It’s time to pull out all the stops,” Lucia said.
“I’ll handle this from here, my sweet Bella. This is a mano-to-mano matter,” Three said with all confidence.
“I suppose,” Lucia shrugged. “See what you can do with him, but if you fail, I’m going to go to plan B and deal with him myself.”
“God you scare the hell out of me, my sweet Bella,” Three said.
“Just giving you fair warning, Three.”
“You’re a whole lot of woman Lucia. You require a whole lot of man, love,” Three said, his eyebrows raised. “Wherever did Nicky find you?”
“1-800-Hell-To-The-No,” I heard Lucia said dismissively.
Lucia and Three’s voices dropped to a whisper. I could hear his footsteps heading my direction. I wondered briefly if the two of them were keeping secrets. Yes. They were keeping secrets. Ahhh, perhaps that was just my alcohol-infused brain operating on paranoia. No. They were fucking keeping secrets.
My head was pounding. I could hear Three coming up my floating stairs. I wanted to stay in my fog and nurse my pain. I didn’t want to be disturbed. I wanted to lay right here with my vodka on my one-thousand-count Egyptian cotton sheets and goose down pillows. I did not want to contend with Three right now.
I wanted my woman to want my baby, not some stranger donor’s from some bullshit fucking fertility clinic. Harper and I were destined to make our own babies. She put a bullet in my plans to make Big Daddy happy by making him a grandson. I couldn’t deny my deep-seated desires to fulfill my dead mother’s dreams for me. Jesus, it was too early in the morning for me to listen to Three’s bullshit.
What the hell. I turned my bottle of Stoli up and took a huge swig. I might as well bite the dog that bit me. My pain was too great. I wanted to numb myself from the whole damn matter. Three was a good brother, but he couldn’t possibly help me endure the pain from watching my own woman having a stranger’s baby. Oh Lord, the mere thought of it all is just too much to bear. My mind hurts, my body hurts, my heart hurts. I turned the bottle of Stoli up again and took another swig.
“Jesus Nicky, you smell,” Three said as he entered my bedroom. “When’s the last time you’ve had a bath, brother? And you need to shave,” Three gazed at me and shook his head.
He began picking my dirty clothes up off the floor and tossing them down the laundry chute. I was naked except for my pair of Hanro boxer briefs. I had a case of empty vodka bottles scattered around on my plush white carpet. I raised my head briefly only to peer into my fish tank. I must be seeing double. It looked like I had two of every fish I owned. That couldn’t be right.
“This is so unlike you, Nicky,” Three said. “What happened to Mr. Immaculate? God? Look at you,” Three said in shock. “You look a mess. Look at this place.”
“I’ve been nailed to the cross,” I moaned taking another swig. “Didn’t you get the memo?”
Even my five o’clock shadow was on its way to looking more like a beard. I felt crucified, so I was sure I was starting to look the part of being crucified.
“Last I checked I don’t have to answer to you,” I grumbled, my head pounding worse. “Leave me alone.”
Three pressed the button on my electronic blinds letting the sunlight hit me in the face. He opened the drawer in my nightstand and pulled out some ibuprofen. Then he reached into the mini fridge and handed me some Evian water.
“Take these,” he said, handing me four of the little pills. “Let me help you to the shower. You can’t let this business with Harper get you down. You’ve got to get back in the game here with Joduku Plastics, man. Are you actually going to let that asshole Brooks Fitzgerald McKenna assault your woman and then walk off with the company that
should belong to Becker Foods on top of that? Really Nicky?”
“Who fucking cares, Three?”
“You do, motherfucker. And so do I.”
“No I really don’t. I’m over this shit with her. She doesn’t want a life with me. She only wants what she wants when she wants it. She’s punishing me,” I groaned.
“Maybe so, maybe not,” Three said. “But you’ll never know for sure drowning yourself in this vodka. The only way you’re going to know for sure is to get in the game and find out. Otherwise you’ll never forgive yourself for not finding out firsthand. What you’re doing is speculating. She’s not a prospectus. You’re avoiding.”
“Her stock value has gone down. She’s no longer a Blue Chip.”
“To hell she is, Nicky. Your eyes are too red to see blue, brother.”
“What’s it to you, Three? Why the hell do you care?” I bitched.
“You’re giving the Becker name a bad rap with all this wallowing. We don’t punk out like this. Get your ass moving,” Three ordered.
“Ugh,” I moaned.
“Trust me. You’ll thank me later and owe me one,” Three huffed. “Remember Nicky, we’re Beckers first. You shoot our dog, we’ll kill your cat,” Three said.
“Yeah man,” I grumbled sitting now up on the side of the bed and holding my head in my hands, my elbows propped against my knees. I swallowed the ibuprofen down with my vodka.
Lord, I can’t stand this pain. If I should lose this love . . .
“We made a pact, Nicky. Have you forgotten? Or has this vodka-binge-laced-pity-party clouded your brain?” Three said, interrupting my thoughts.
“Nope I haven’t forgotten. You put one of ours in the hospital, we put one of yours in the morgue,” I said, reciting out the mantra my brother Three and I have lived by since we were little kids.
“That’s right, motherfucker,” Three said, knocking me off my ass and pushing me toward my bathroom door, opening the shower door and turning on the jets. “It’s time for you to go get what’s yours,” Three insisted.
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