The tears fall and I can’t stop them. God this is so embarrassing. Good going, Sandra. Way to ruin it. I can’t even look at him. “I’m just going to go. I’m so sorry about this.”
Before I can get up, he grabs my hand. “Don’t go. You didn’t ruin anything. If anything, you made me like you more. I was bullied too growing up. I know how it feels, but I can’t imagine what you went through. I admire you. You’re so brave for being true to yourself. I think that’s extremely noble and courageous. Willing to endure so much pain just to be your true self. And for all those people who tried to hurt you and bully you, they don’t deserve you. Look, I can understand that you have a hard time trusting people. If I experienced what you have, I would too, but I have no intentions of hurting you. You’re safe with me. Just stop beating yourself up. What happened to you was not your fault. You never deserved any of that hate. So don’t think you are unworthy of love. Okay?”
God, now I’m crying. His words are like rain that wash away all the pain I’ve endured for so long. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his warm embrace and I melt from his touch. How did I get so lucky to meet such a kind soul?
“It’s okay. Everything is going to be okay from now on. I promise,” he says as he strokes my hair. I wish that were true. I know that once this vacation is over life is just going to go back to shit. “What do you say we go get some food? I’m starving. Then we can do something fun later today. I’ve always wanted to swim with dolphins. What do you say?”
I wipe away the tears and look up at him. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
We finally pull ourselves up out of bed and I manage to find my clothes strewn all over the place. Charlie gives me a good swat on the butt as I bend over to pick them up. That makes my face flush with heat. I can’t help but catch glimpses of him. What he calls love handles aren’t even that noticeable. I can tell he works out like crazy. He’s got a little bit of a dad bod but I think that’s super sexy.
I decide not to put on makeup and just go with him to the buffet. He holds my hand unapologetically as we make our way through the hot sunny morning. It’s as if he doesn’t care if anyone sees us. He treats me like his girlfriend and it makes me feel so special. I’ve never expected this from anyone. Being trans, I feel like I’m lucky just to be some guy’s object to be used as wrong as that sounds. With most guys as soon as they find out I’m trans they want nothing to do with me, but Charlie doesn’t seem to care. He seems like he’s proud to have me by his side. Is this a dream?
Most of the stuff in the resort is outside. We find the buffet under a huge gazebo. We are greeted by the hostess and they give us a table that seats four. After we both fill up a huge plate full of food and get something to drink, we meet back at the table.
Charlie’s brother stumbles in and sits down with us. Charlie eyes him warily. “You look like shit.”
“You must’ve not drunk enough,” his brother replies before he looks over at me. God, I really wish I would’ve put makeup on. I just know he’s clocking me. I wonder what Charlie will do if his brother finds out I’m trans. Maybe he already told him. “I see Charlie hasn’t scared you off yet. He must’ve not told you about his pokemon card collection yet.”
I look over at Charlie wide-eyed. “You collect pokemon cards?”
“Yeah, when I was 10. Come on, Cody. It’s not like you didn’t.”
“Nah, what would’ve been the point? You already had them all,” Cody says.
“I think that’s super badass. I had such a huge collection before my dad decided that I was too old for them and threw them out,” I say.
“Really? What an asshole,” Charlie says.
“Whatever happened to your card collection? Do you still have them?” Cody asks as he looks over at Charlie.
“No, I ended up giving them to Ariana when she was like, seven,” he says.
“Damn shame, I bet some of those cards were worth loads,” Cody says.
“Did you guys ever play the Gameboy games?” I ask.
“Of course,” Charlie says. “I beat them so many times, I lost count. I actually managed to get every single Pokemon from fire red all the way to emerald on one account.”
“Nerd alert,” Cody says.
“That’s so badass. I was really into sword and shield,” I say.
“Never got that far. That was kind of past my generation I supposed,” Charlie says.
“Yeah, that’s because you’re old,” Cody says.
“Hey! I’m not that old,” Charlie says as he punches Cody in the shoulder.
“Hey! Don’t start something you can’t finish, old man,” Cody retorts. I can’t help but laugh at them.
“Please don’t tell me you two are going to get into a fight,” says a really beautiful blonde girl that looks a little younger than me. She sits down in the open seat.
“Hey, speaking of Ariana. You still have those Pokemon cards?” Cody asks.
“No, I gave them to Jackson, why?” she asks.
“Just curious,” Cody says.
“If you’re trying to get back into it, good luck. You’re definitely not getting those cards from Jackson. He idolizes them. It’s really weird,” she says. She finally looks over at me. She smiles. “You definitely don’t look like the sort of girl that Cody would be able to attract and by that, I mean slutty, desperate, and a few clowns short of a circus. So that means you must be here with Charlie. In that case, I’m Ariana, their niece.”
She holds out her hand with what seems like a genuine smile. I take and shake it. “I’m Alessandra, Sandra for short.”
“Well, Sandra, it’s nice to meet you. You seem cool. Are you here on spring break?” she asks.
I nod. “Yeah, I’m here with my family.”
“Oh, nice. So how did you meet Charlie?” she asks.
“We met at the bar,” I say.
“Well, technically we bumped into each other on the plane,” Charlie says.
“True. But we had a really nice conversation at the bar and we had a lot of fun on the dance floor,” I say.
“Nice. Charlie really needs someone nice in his life. His last relationship was a disaster. I still have no idea why he chose to propose to a complete gold-digging, Karen.”
“You’re talking like I’m not here. You know I can hear you right?” Charlie asks.
“Oh I’m well aware,” she says.
“So, Sandra, I take it you’re in college?” she asks as she takes a bite of her food.
“Well, I’m actually taking a year off,” I sort of mumble out. I really hope she doesn’t ask why.
“Oh right. There’s nothing wrong with that. By the way, I love your hair. Not many girls can pull off the short hair, but you do it well,” she says, making me blush.
“Thanks. I’m actually really jealous of your blonde hair. I’ve always wanted blonde hair. What kind of conditioner do you use?” I ask.
“Oh thanks, I use Herbal Essence Beach Plastic Coconut Milk & Sea Kelp. Pretty much anything with either Coconut Milk or oil is so amazing for your hair. It really helps the skelp and makes your hair so silky smooth. I would highly recommend it,” she says.
“Sweet, I will have to check it out,” I say.
“For sure,” she says with a smile.
“Tranny alert,” I hear someone say and I look up to see Michael Harmon sitting at a table over with the rest of Pat’s friends including Amber. Michael has always been the worst of Pat’s friends. The biggest asshole ever. Just when things were going so well they had to show up. God, I just want to go bury my face in the sand. I see my brother embarrassed as he punches Michael in the arm. Amber’s loving every second of it.
“What a bunch of assholes, do you know any of them?” Ariana asks. I nod as I try to hide my face in my hands.
“Who were they calling a tranny?” Cody asks. I look up at Charlie and see he looks pissed. I’m probably embarrassing him in front of his family. Will he even
want to be with me once his family figures out I’m the tranny?
“Cody, don’t use that term. It’s such an offensive word,” Ariana says. Her eyes meet mine and I can tell she figured it out.
“Hey, I was just quoting them,” Cody says.
“Hey, you guys realize you’re sitting with a shemale, right? Yeah, that’s actually a dude,” Michael shouts out. Fucking asshole. I can feel the tears trying to fight their way out of my eyes.
“Dude stop,” I hear Pat say.
“What? I’m just telling it like it is,” Michael says.
“Seriously, are they talking about us?” Cody asks.
I look up at Charlie as he goes to stand up. He must feel so embarrassed. Is he going to confront them? Before he can make a move, Ariana shoots up from her seat and marches over to them.
“You guys are such assholes. Like seriously, do you have any shred of human decency? What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you that fucking stupid and insensitive to treat another human being like that? Like for real, you are all acting like immature children. Fucking grow up,” she yells loud enough for everyone to hear. Then she grabs Michael’s drink and pours it over him before walking back to us. I’m literally blown away. I have no words that can say how amazed I am. No one has ever stood up for me like that. Now I’m crying because of how awesome that was.
“What a bitch,” I hear Michael say.
“Hey don’t talk to my fucking neice like that,” Cody shouts as he stands up.
“Did you not see her fucking just pour a fucking drink over my head?” Michael asks.
“Dude, come on. Let it go. You deserved it anyway,” Pat says.
“Since when have you ever cared about your freak of a brother?” Michael asks.
“Dude, fuck off,” Pat says as he pushes Michael. Did he just stand up for me?
“Come on man, I’m only joking,” Michael says.
“Yeah? Well, it’s not funny anymore,” Pat says before he walks away. The rest of them follow. They all give us the stink eye on their way out.
“Are you okay?” Ariana asks me as she places her hand on my forearm.
I nod as I wipe away the tears. “No one’s ever stood up for me like that.”
“Aww, No one deserves to be treated like that,” she says as she proceeds to pull me into a hug. “You need to get some better friends. Ones that will have your back and you know what?”
“What’s that?” I ask, looking into her blue eyes.
“You’ve got me now and I’ve got your back,” she says. Once again, I can’t help but cry.
“I’ve never had a friend like you before,” I say, trying to wipe away the flood of tears breaking through the corners of my eyes. “To be honest, I’ve never really had any friends.”
“Oh my god. That’s so sad,” she says and pulls me back into a hug. “Well, you do now. In fact, I think we’re going to be really good friends.”
“So who the fuck were those dickheads?” Cody asks.
“I take it the one guy who told the asshole to fuck off is your brother, am I right?” she asks.
I nod. “Yeah, Patrick is really a good guy at heart. He’s just having a hard time accepting me. We used to be really close before…” I trail off. I know they know I’m trans, but I still don’t want to say it.
“I understand. But still, he should do a better job of sticking up for you. He’s your brother, that’s his job,” she says.
“I don’t blame him for anything. Because of me, he gets ridiculed and harassed. People make fun of him for being my brother,” I say.
“So what! You're his family. Nothing else should matter. I’ll never let anyone harass my brother. Hell, I still have to stick up for my uncles. Especially Charlie. He’s kind of a pushover,” she says, making me laugh.
“Hey! I am not,” Charlie says.
She ignores him. “I have to admit, you do have a hot brother. I know no one wants to hear that. If he wasn’t such an idiot I would seriously consider dating him.”
“Yeah, that’s gross, but you would make an amazing sister-in-law,” I admit. “Definitely better than Amber.”
“I take it Amber’s the blonde sitting next to him?” I nod. “Figures. She looks like a bitch. He has some seriously bad taste in girls and in friends.”
“Yeah, tell me about it. Everyone in my home town is just like them.”
“Really? That’s awful. You need to move right away,” she says.
“Ariana, there you are. We’ve been looking everywhere for you,” says a beautiful red-head in a group with 3 other girls just as pretty. She then looks up at the rest of us and her eyes go wide before a wide smile crosses her face. She then waves her hand in what I think is meant to be seductive. “Oh, hey Cody. I didn’t know you were here.”
“Hey girls,” Cody says with a knee breaking grin. Even I can admit that Cody is super hot. He’s got that easy-going surfer look, but I much prefer Charlie.
Their friends also greet Cody with over-exaggerated excitement. Ariana rolls her eyes. “Hey, if you ever want a break from Charlie, you’re more than welcome to hang out with us. And don’t worry, none of my friends will judge you. We’re all really accepting.”
“Really?” I ask.
“Of course,” she says with a smile.
“That sounds great,” I say.
“Sweet, we’ll talk later,” she says as she smiles at me. She then looks over at Charlie and Cody. “I’ll catch you all later. We’re going over to the beach.”
“Stay safe,” Charlie says.
“Don’t do anything Charlie wouldn’t do,” Cody says.
“Don’t do anything Cody would do,” Charlie says. I can’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, that really doesn’t give us much room to work with,” Ariana says with a sigh as she leaves with her friends.
We finish up eating and Cody heads off, leaving Charlie and me alone. “Hey, I’m really sorry about that. I should’ve said something and I should’ve had your back. I was about to rip their heads off before Ariana beat me to it.”
“You’re fine. I have to admit, your niece is a badass,” I say.
“Yeah, she definitely gets that from me, you know,” he says with a smile and then laughs. “I can’t even say that with a straight face. She really gets her temper and fire from her mother. My sister is a hot blooded woman who doesn’t take any shit from anyone.”
“Well, you’ve got an amazing niece and I’m glad I met her,” I say.
“So, are we going to swim with some dolphins later?” he asks.
“Yes, I would love to. That sounds like so much fun. I should probably check in with my mother first. She hasn’t seen me in almost 24 hours,” I say.
“Yeah definitely. If you’d like, I can see if Ariana and her friends want to come. I’m sure Cody would love to come,” he says.
“Yeah, that sounds like a lot of fun,” I say.
“Okay, well you know where my room is, so let’s say we meet there around 1 o’clock,” he says as he gets up and holds out his hand to help me up from my seat.
“That sounds like a plan,” I say with a smile.
“Great,” he says with a smile. Then he completely shocks me when he leans in and kisses me in front of everyone. My heart literally went comatose with excitement. When he finally pulls away, I can breathe again and I can’t help but smile. I’ve never felt so happy before. “I’ll see you at one then.”
“Definitely,” I squeak out. He finally walks away and I can’t help but glance at him as he disappears. God, this has been such a dream. How can I be so lucky?
I practically skip back to my parents’ room. As I walk in, I find my dad watching TV and my mom gets up. “Where have you been? I’ve been worried sick.”
“I’m sorry, I just… I met someone and he really makes me feel special,” I say.
“Aww, that’s nice. But for future references, a text would’ve been nice,” my mother s
ays.
“Sorry, I will remember that for next time,” I say.
“So, are you going to tell me about this special someone?” she asks.
“He’s the most amazing and kindest man I have ever met,” I start out.
“So that’s what you were doing,” my dad interjects while keeping his eyes glued to the TV. “You were off doing only God knows what kind of disgusting acts with another man. When will you come to your senses and realize what you’re doing is wrong.”
“Ed, will you shut up? Why can’t you just accept her for who she is?” my mother snaps at him.
“Because it’s wrong. My son has become an abomination,” he growls. “I can’t even stand looking at him when he dresses like that. Would you put on some real clothes? You look ridiculous!”
Every word that comes out of my father’s mouth feels like a cut upon my skin. I bleed out in pain from his disdain. I would give anything just for his acceptance. Hell, I wish I was the son he wanted. I wish I could be normal. He thinks I chose this, but I never wanted to be this way. This is just who I am. I walk out in tears. Why am I like this?
I hear the door open behind me. “You are such a fucking asshole, Ed.”
The door slams so hard it echoes through the hall. It hurts to know that I am the reason they can’t stand each other. It’s as if my existence brings them pain. Somedays I just wish I wasn’t born. I hate being alive. Why was I brought into this world just to become such a burden? Does my life even matter?
“Honey...” my mother says as I feel her hand on my shoulder. She pulls me into her arms as soon as she sees the tears. “Everything is going to be okay. I promise.”
The Honeymoon Page 4