"Will, don't apologise. Draoi bonds are often hard to deal with for Duilleogs and even Craobhs. I admit our bond is a bit strong but we are the only ones left. It's just our ribbon that we have."
I looked and the one between us was thicker now than before and it rippled with unseen winds. The brilliant blue was just as brilliant as before, but now I could see there was more of a white sheen added to it — an iridescence. But I was more interested in the two smaller ribbons leaving me and disappearing through the bookshelves. Intrigued I followed the thicker of the two and was happy to find it led to Dog, who, I could feel through the link, was about to finish the chase of a rabbit. My sudden presence on his mind startled him and he stumbled and bowled ass over head in the grass. I pulled back and laughed.
"No, Nadine, I see two more beside ours. Although they are much smaller than ours and different in intensity. I just followed one and startled Dog out of chasing a rabbit."
"Dog? Did you say one went to Dog?"
"Yes, it was Dog."
"That's not possible."
"What? Why?"
"Dogs aren't human. The draoi bond is between draoi. Humans are draoi, not dogs."
"Someone should tell that to Dog," I looked at the bond to Dog. It was the same brilliant blue as the one between Nadine and I. The only difference was the lack of white iridescence. "Looks pretty much the same," I said to her. "Except without the pearly white."
Nadine grasped my arm and squeezed it painfully hard. "Pearly white? Whose is pearly white?"
"Nadine, ouch, let go," I said and tried to pry her hand off me. "Ours, between you and me."
"Describe it!" she demanded.
"Well, it's a brilliant blue, about a foot wide, it moves as if in a wind or on water. It now has a white sheen to it. It's beautiful."
"Dear Gaea," said Nadine and she collapsed in her seat. "That's not possible."
"Nadine, you aren't making any sense to me."
"I will," she whispered. "I will. Not now. Later. We need to get this book out of here."
I hesitated. Something obviously bothered her and I didn't understand it. I looked at our bond and it was as strong as ever. Through it, I could sense her distress but not the why. I reached out to Dog and felt amusement there. I looked at the other thread. It was thin as an actual thread and I followed it to discover the baby Euan that I had met on the road into Jergen. I was only a little surprised at that. I had felt something from him when we parted. This was what it must have been. He was content, fed and with his mother. I withdrew and found Nadine still slumped in the chair.
I wanted to tell Nadine what I had seen but I sensed at the moment it was more important to get out of the library with our manuscript. Our two hours were up and I had no idea how we could smuggle a book weighing close to ten pounds and the size of a small table out past the priest at the front desk of the Library.
Leaving the library turned out to be easier than I thought. As we made our way back to the front desk I asked Nadine what we should do and she just hushed me. Frustrated, I followed behind her. When we arrived near the desk she pointed at the front door and made walking motions with her fingers. As I started moving she called out to Peter and strode over to the counter. Once she had him engaged in conversation she returned the key, thanking him for allowing us access, and I walked past and out the front door to the steps. Peter saw nothing and heard what he needed to hear: Nadine would mix him the new potion as soon as possible. I stood on the steps blinking at the afternoon sun and clutching the book tight to my chest. My heart was racing and I expected Peter to come running out crying Thief! at any moment. Instead, Nadine stepped out and took my arm. I could sense her without thinking about it. I know where she is at all times now, and that makes me happy. Dog, too. I'm never alone now. I smiled down at her.
She raised an eyebrow at me. "All is well. Relax. Let's head home," she said.
I nodded and started down the steps with Nadine holding on to me. We merged with the people moving in our direction on the sidewalk. Horses and riders were moving in both directions and it seemed like organised chaos to me. Fortunately, everyone was out shopping and running errands and we blended in like anyone else. Only after we turned the corner away from the library did I relax. We made it, I thought. We have the book.
The past two months all came flooding back. From the night the assassin lifted me off the ground in my camp outside Jaipers to walking into Jergen, I had been on the path to retrieving this book. A wild sense of elation flooded me and I smiled and laughed.
"What are you laughing at?"
"I have the book. I have the answers I was looking for. I just can't believe it."
"Celebrate when we get home."
"I will. I'll make you a wonderful dinner. Dog has a rabbit and a grouse waiting."
Nadine looked at me. "So it's true. Can you sense Dog? Do you have a draoi connection to him?"
"Yes," I said, watching the people around us. We were speaking quietly and no one could hear us, No one seemed to be paying us any attention. We were an old woman and a young man — a mother and son perhaps, out for a stroll. "A blue ribbon. I have three of them. You do, too, the same ones."
"Who is the last one?"
"A baby boy named Euan I met on the road to Jergen. I think I know when the bond formed. I felt a moment with him when we parted. I thought nothing of it until now."
"You found one of the future draoi, Will. You will know them when you meet them. That is common. It is how we — you — find each other."
"I see. Does a draoi have to meet the person?"
"Well, no. The lore tells us that you can reach out with your senses and Gaea's power will mark them. It hasn't been done for a long time. It takes a great deal of power — a power that has to come first from Gaea."
I grew silent for a time and we walked, each lost in our own thoughts. Something still troubled Nadine and I wished she would tell me. Daukyns would urge patience and so I decided to wait until she was ready. "Does the book explain all this?"
"The manuscript, yes. It's not a book, Will. A book is ... oh, never mind. To answer your question, yes, it does. It explains much of what we do and can't do. It contains our lore. The original manuscripts were given to the draoi by Gaea herself, it is said. Over a thousand years ago."
"A thousand?" I tried to imagine so many years and failed. "Gaea can take form? I thought she was just a voice."
Nadine laughed softly. "It is so easy for me to forget you know nothing. I'm sorry, I will need to explain things better. Gaea can take whatever form she wants. She doesn't manifest — she borrows. We are all Gaea, you see. You. Me. That woman walking ahead of us. All Gaea. When she wants to, she becomes more conscious in that person. It's frightening sometimes. She could become me. Or you. In an instant. And when she leaves, you remember nothing or very little — like trying to remember a dream."
"I don't think I understand. Truly. It seems so...strange...I hear your words but I can't seem to put it all together in my head."
"You will in time. I've only seen it once. When you were born. Gaea came to the birth. She emerged in one of the midwives. She thanked your mom and left. Just like that. Hello. It's me Gaea. Well done. Cheerio. She works in mysterious ways. Anyway. All this..." and Nadine waved her free arm aimlessly to take in the city street. "All life is her."
"Okay. Fine. Well, Dog is part of her then. So what's the problem with me having a blue line to him?"
"Because he's a dog. The bond you see is between draoi. Dogs can't be draoi."
"You keep saying that. Why not?"
Nadine shut her mouth in a tight line and went silent. I thought she wasn't going to answer and she surprised me when she did. "Because."
"Well, if Gaea is all life, and Dog is part of that life. I think that if Gaea wants to give powers to a dog she can," I reasoned.
Nadine clucked her tongue but stayed silent.
I continued to fill the silence. "You mentioned familiars to me. I have heard ta
les of witches with familiars. Was that draoi with their familiars? Is it what I think it is?"
"Not exactly. You are correct, most witches were simple draoi. It never went well for those caught. It is one of the many reasons why we keep our powers hidden. But a familiar, that is different than a draoi bond. The draoi builds a trust with an animal and then asks it to do certain tasks. There is no ribbon between the draoi and the animal but the draoi uses their power to form a bond. It allows a means to communicate a little better, that is all. For the animal to understand what the draoi wants. The animal can either ignore the request or do as it is asked. It becomes a trust issue. Animals love just as any human and if an animal loves the draoi there is nothing they won't do to do as they are asked. We have many tales of familiars sacrificing themselves for the draoi. Anyhow, the manuscript explains it in greater detail. You should know it is a one-way communication path. You sense no communication from the animal and you are limited to what the animal can do. A cat or similar small animal can't carry something large or heavy, for example. A horse could but the horse couldn't go someplace small and cramped. Do you follow?"
"Yes, so any animal then?"
"Well, yes. Any animal capable of forming a relationship with the draoi."
"So, not an insect then."
Nadine glanced up at me and scowled and looked away. "Daft," she muttered and kept walking.
We walked the rest of the way in silence. When we reached her home Dog came bounding up to us, tail wagging. I knelt down and scratched his ears.
"Hey, Dog. Missed you. Where'd you put the rabbit and the grouse?"
Dog bounded up and I followed him to where the carcasses lay by the back door. I picked them up and Dog grinned up at me with his tongue lolling long and wet from his mouth. Nadine came up behind us and stared at Dog.
"Good job, Dog!" I said. "Can you not sense him, Nadine? Through the bond?"
Nadine shook her head and turned and walked away. I felt her distress at my words and watched, confused, as she quickly moved to go into her house. She told me to stay outside and she stood fumbling with the latch on the door. I moved behind her and held her upper arm and gently swung her around. She tried to hide her face but I saw the tears and I felt terrible knowing somehow I had caused them.
"What did I say? Nadine? I'm sorry?" I said in a rush. Nadine grabbed me and pressed her face to my chest and I held her. "What, please tell me? What's wrong?"
Her reply was muffled in my shirt.
"What? I can't understand you."
She leaned back her head and wiped her nose. "I said, I can't see or feel the bonds, Will. I have no power. The only draoi I felt was when your mother passed during the Purge." She laid her head against my chest again. "I can't see or feel the draoi bonds. I never have."
"But you have them. I can see them."
"Yes, I am draoi. But my powers from Gaea are so slight that it is only with extraordinary effort that I can effect anything. You've seen my garden. It's beautiful, but it has taken me years to reach that level of bounty. No, no powers for me. No ability to see or sense the bonds between the draoi. I was one of them and yet separate. Your mother was the only one to show me any true sympathy or love."
With a sudden realisation, I understood the full import of what it had done to her. For her whole life, she had never truly been a part of the draoi world. She had been isolated her entire life and surrounded by wonders she could only dream of being able to do. During the Purge, she had felt nothing of the losses through her bonds and probably sat in her house and waited for the Church to come to her door. She had lived a life alone and afraid. I held her closer. This poor woman.
"Nadine, I can sense and see the bonds and the one between you and I is beautiful. I wish you could see it. It is wide and blue with a little white swirling through it. I can sense everything about you. I can close my eyes and almost see you through it."
Nadine nodded her head against my chest and cried harder. I felt mixed emotions from her and I couldn't separate them. She was beyond distraught.
Thirty-Two
Nadine's House, Jergen Waterfront, 900 A.C.
NADINE AND I settled into a routine over the next few weeks. Mostly she kept away from me and rarely spoke. I would catch her looking out of the corners of her eyes at me. I did my best to give her room but the house was small and we had to interact. When we did, she was furtive. Through our bond, I felt a conflict within her. Something bothered her deeply. She cared for me, that much I knew for sure for a strong sense of it could not be hidden through our bond, but I had nothing to compare it to. And so I, too, was confused.
"There may be errors in the copy," she said on the first day back from the Library. When I went to question her she disappeared outside and didn't return until dusk. She ate her prepared supper and went to her bed.
I practiced using my power until Nadine confirmed I kept the tell-tale blue glow clear from eyes. Days passed in quiet contemplation. I watched Nadine with the manuscript and waited patiently for her to tell me what she had found. She had replaced the torn pages in the book and it sat on the kitchen table most of the time. I spent my time in her garden and coaxed her plants to greater strength and potential. Dog followed me around when he wasn't off chasing rabbits and sea gulls. He was my only confidant for the first week back from the library and I felt almost like I was alone on the road again.
"I don't know what I did to anger her," I said to Dog one day.
Dog looked at me and wagged his tail.
"Seriously. What did I do?" I asked.
Dog inched forward and licked my nose in response. That was the best I was to get out of him other than a sense of amusement. Whatever was going on, Dog was amused. Good to know, I thought and went back to tending the herbs.
I made our meals every evening and we ate in silence except for small talk about plants and my tales of life outside Jaipers. The most we had interacted was once we washed each other's hair. I had started on my own one evening and she had taken over without a word. Her hands strong and sure on my scalp. It was relaxing and I felt happy for a while as we connected. Then it was her turn. She told me quietly what to do and I followed her instructions. Her white hair was fading fast and the red was coming through bright. I told her and she smiled. She closed her eyes and I massaged her scalp and cleaned her hair. I dried it and tied some rosemary through a braid and she kissed my cheek. She left me alone after that and barely looked at me over meals.
After another week, Nadine joined me on the swing outside and reported the manuscript was an almost perfect copy.
"I knew at once it was a copy," she had said when I asked if she was sure. "But I spent the last couple of weeks cataloguing the differences. I looked for marks or additions. I wanted to figure out how the copy was made and by whom." She turned pages and pointed out various places which, she assured me, were different from the originals.
I mulled it over and nodded when she pointed out another discrepancy. "Perhaps it isn't a copy at all," I said. We were sitting on the swing outside and Dog lay asleep at our feet. On my feet, actually.
Nadine scowled at me. "What do you mean?"
"Well, the first manuscripts, they were written by hand. A hand with Gaea in control. Correct?"
"Yes, Gaea possessed dozens of people at once, according to the legends. They each wrote sections of the manuscript. Others crafted the leather bindings and embossed the covers. All four manuscripts were created at once and all were exactly the same. It was a marvel."
"So what stopped her from creating this one, too? Or, if she knew about it being copied, to either stop it or assist somehow?"
Nadine moved to speak and then shut her mouth. After a moment, she grimaced and smacked me. Hard on the same spot as always on my upper arm. "Ass."
"Ass? What for?"
"For being such a wiseass. I never thought of that. I suppose whether or not it was people who created the copy, she knew and either helped or didn't care. I suppose it doesn't matter
, though. It is an accurate copy. But it is a unique version."
"How so?"
"Well, you would have to have seen or held the originals. I was one of the few allowed to do so. I had access to your mother's, in case you were wondering. She would leave it out for me in her chambers. Told me to study it all I wanted. She would smile and leave me alone with it. I spent hours with it. Hours and hours. I loved the manuscript. I knew it inside and out. I was particularly drawn to the drawings of the plants. The vibrancy of the colours. They were so beautiful." Nadine shook her head slowly with a ghost of a smile, clearing the cobwebs. "Sorry. What I mean to say...to get to. Never mind the plant drawings, I'll get to that. It is enough to know that the covers of the original manuscripts were embossed. This copy isn't. It's flat, feel here." Nadine held out the book and I rubbed the triskelion on the cover. It was smooth to the touch. "This is significant. It was how I knew it was a copy at once."
"Does that matter? That it's a copy?"
"No, I don't think so. I mean, my memories could be wrong after so long, but I am fairly certain that this is an exact copy. The details are all there. Only the plants are drawn a little different. That's all. The words. They seem the same to me. No way to tell for sure. Not until we get our hands on an original to directly compare it to. Still, I am pretty sure my memory of the original is pretty accurate. The manuscript was my life for so many years."
"So what now?"
Nadine looked at me for a moment and then patted the top of my hand and then held it.
"For starters, I study the book more. Then I find a way to help you. Without a Stoc to guide you, I fear you might hurt yourself. Gaea's powers are not minor. For some draoi, it takes years of practice to gain control. I have no power but I have the lore. It will have to be enough."
"Hmm. Probably won't be. I'm sure to die. I can feel it."
"Probably."
I smacked her on the upper arm and she squealed and jumped up in shock off the swing. She turned and gaped at me. "You! You!" she shouted, her face red.
Leaf and Branch (New Druids Series Vol 1 & 2) Page 53