by Tawny Weber
“Oh yeah.” Elijah pushed to his feet, the scars on his leg pulling tight as he straightened. “I know exactly what you can do.”
Ignoring Savino as his commander stepped through the trees, Elijah strode forward until he was right there in Ramsey’s face. With Lansky holding his arms behind him, the man couldn’t move, so he was left with baring his teeth and glaring.
“You’re the guy who turned your back on your brothers. The man who betrayed your team, your rank, your country. You’re a lying SOB who ran out on your own kid. You’re the lying motherfucker who left me to burn while you ran away like the weasel you are.”
“Prescott.”
Elijah blinked, then when that didn’t clear the blood from his eyes, sucked in a deep breath and blinked again.
“Lansky, you want to secure this trash,” Savino ordered, whipping out a zip tie and watching, stone-faced, while his men wrapped the guy’s hands together behind his back. “Lieutenant Brandon Ramsey, you’ll be escorted back to base, where you’ll stand trial for treason. Do you have anything to say for yourself?”
“Fuck you.”
Savino nodded.
“That’s what I figured. Men.” He gestured for Lansky to release him to the waiting SEALs.
“We’ve got this,” Ward said, snagging one arm while Rengel grabbed the other. “We’ll lock him up in the transport.”
Fighting like the crazed lunatic he was, Ramsey resisted all the way.
“You’ll pay,” he screamed as Rengel and Ward hauled his kicking, swearing ass through the woods. “I’ll make sure of it.”
“Dude is a total cliché.” Shaking his head, Elijah gave Savino a sardonic smile. “You’d think he’d take a little more pride in his big exit.”
“Given that he never thought he’d be caught, I guess he didn’t have anything prepared,” Lansky said. “Guys like that are crap at improv.”
“Guys like you are aces at it, though,” Savino said, clearly still prepared for confrontation as he stood, feet planted and arms crossed, staring at Lansky.
“Can’t deny I’ve got a quick brain,” Lansky replied. His grin fell away as his eyes traveled from Savino’s set expression to Elijah’s closed one and back again. “My quick brain is telling me right now that there’s an issue. Other than the loser they just hauled away.”
Taking his cue from Savino, Elijah stayed silent. But, man, it was killing him. He wanted his friend cleared. He wanted his team cleared. And he wanted this mission finished so he could get back to Napa and settle life with Ava.
“Am I the issue?” Lansky asked, chin stiff as he stared at his commanding officer.
“Prescott?”
Elijah knew the prompt wasn’t for an explanation, but to bring them both up to date. “Key information was disbursed among specific personnel with the goal of ascertaining the intelligence leak. Lieutenant Lansky’s information was not shared in any way, shape or form. Added to that, specifics shared by the hostile indicate that the leak is a higher ranking officer, one in a position of authority.”
Savino’s expression didn’t change, but Elijah could see his body stiffen. Lansky, on the other hand, turned an interesting shade of purple.
“You thought I was working with that scumbag?” Lansky said.
“Not me,” Elijah claimed, throwing his hands in the air.
“Your behavior over the last couple of months was questionable. Your actions suspicious.” Savino stood, arms clasped behind his back as he stared coldly at the man under his command. “Given the delicacy of the situation, and the fact that one of our own already betrayed us, you’ve been looked at carefully.”
“And now?”
“And now that Rembrandt cleared you, you can tag along to the extraction point while you explain what the hell’s been going on.”
“Yes, sir.” Lansky seemed to sag in place, the tension simply dropping away as he took a deep breath. Then, shaking it off with his usual verve, he tried a smile. It was a little edgy, but it was there.
“And what about Ramsey?” Elijah asked. “Do we have enough on him?”
“We have enough to try him.” Savino stared down the ravaged path, evidence of Ramsey’s reluctant departure evident in the deep grooves in the dirt and damage to the surrounding underbrush. He slanted an arch look at Elijah. “You’ll have to live it all over again. You up for that?”
“I live it all over again every time I close my eyes,” Elijah admitted with a sigh. Then he realized the heavy weight of horror that had anchored him to those memories was missing. Like the scars, like his past, what had happened was a part of him now. And he could finally accept that nothing was going to change that. “What happened, happened. It was crap—it hurt a lot of people. But at least reliving it in court, we can get some use out of it.”
After a long second and a longer inspection of Elijah’s face, Savino nodded. “There ya go.”
Together the three of them hit the path, heading in the direction that Ramsey had been hauled.
“So what’s the deal?” Elijah asked, giving Jared a sidelong inspection. The guy looked good. Lighter, a little easier than usual.
“So, well, yeah.” Jared cleared his throat, jerked his shoulders a couple of times, then took a breath. “I realized recently that I might have a drinking problem.”
“Noooo,” Elijah and Nic said together, as mocking as mocking could be.
“Right. Whatever.” Jared laughed. “I can handle it. I can live with it and do my job and be excellent. But it was affecting other things.”
“The woman?” Elijah realized. “The Greek goddess?”
“Yeah. Andi didn’t want anything to do with me. She hated what I do, and she called me a lush. At first, I figured fine. A woman’s a woman, right?”
“Unless she’s the right woman.”
“Exactly. So I pushed it, I asked her to give it a chance. She didn’t want anything to do with a guy in the Special Ops, who lived on the edge of lies, but I was able to talk her around on that. You know, serving the country, saving lives, that sort of thing.” Angling through a break in the trees, the other men nodded. That sort of thing did tend to turn the tide. “But she had another issue. She insisted that I get cleaned up. Get sober. All the way sober.”
Elijah’s snort was drowned out by the sound of Nic’s laugh. Then they realized he was serious.
“You’re sober?”
“I joined AA, started going to the meetings.” His eyes locked on his feet, Jared kicked the dirt a little and shrugged. “At first it was just for her. Then, after a while, it seemed the right thing to do. For her. For me. For the team.”
“Good man,” Nic said, slapping him on the shoulder.
“If you need anything, we’re here for you,” Elijah added.
As they continued their trip through the woods and Jared filled them in on his AA adventures and the world according to Andi, a calm filled Elijah. A sense of mellow contentment seeped in, filling the holes left by bitterness and anger.
It was done. It was all done. He’d brought down Ramsey. Cleared his name. Sure, the trial was yet to come, but it was secondary. Primary was that the brotherhood knew he was innocent—and now, thanks to Savino, he’d achieved that.
“You’ll need to report for duty Monday.”
“Duty?” Elijah frowned, but didn’t say anything else. Since Savino didn’t, either, he knew his commander understood.
Elijah might not be going back. He’d testify. He’d complete Operation Fuck Up. But his time in service?
He puffed out a long breath, trying to unknot the tangle of thoughts speeding through his head.
Serving again? That was a hard decision to make. He’d have to give up Ava. He didn’t know if they had a chance, if they had a future. But he did know that the only shot they’d get at one wa
s if they didn’t repeat the same mistakes they’d made in the past.
Which meant they couldn’t live 90 percent of their lives apart and expect to be a couple. He didn’t want to be torn like that again, one foot in both worlds. Always feeling as if a piece of him was always missing, waiting and longing on the other side.
They couldn’t survive Ava hating his career. Hating what made him who he was. He didn’t know if he could change, but he was willing to try. Especially now that he knew he was more than a SEAL. More than part of the brotherhood.
Bottom line? He couldn’t survive without giving them a shot. As long as Ava was willing to give him one. Which meant the decision wasn’t so hard after all.
“I’m going to need an extension on my leave. I can’t report on Monday,” he told Savino quietly. “I have to go back to Napa. I have to settle things with Ava.”
“You and Cupcake are back together?” Jared asked with a smile and a congratulatory slap on the back.
“I don’t know what we are. That’s what I have to figure out.”
“And if being back together means leaving the Navy?” Nic asked, his tone as neutral as Switzerland.
“What? No way...” Jared stopped in his tracks, his boots kicking up a cloud of dust as he stared at Elijah. “Seriously?”
Elijah and Nic stopped with him, the three of them shaded by tall trees on one side and the view of the lake glistening on the other. The scent of the forest surrounded them as Elijah faced his friends.
“I didn’t give my marriage one hundred percent before, and I lost Ava. I want her back. I want it to work this time. That means making a choice.”
“And you’re choosing her.” Like Nic, there was no judgment in Jared’s tone. Just understanding.
“I love her. She deserves to be put first.”
And that was that.
There was no remorse in his heart, except for the regret of leaving his friends. But he could see it in the other men’s eyes. Because they were friends, there was nothing to be sorry for. Savino understood. The others would, too.
“You’ll be the first to walk away from Poseidon,” Savino said as they stopped on the edge of the clearing. The path to the left led to the cabin, nestled in a gentle copse of trees. The right led to the transport and Ramsey.
“I’ll always value my time serving with you, the honor of being a part of the brotherhood,” Elijah murmured. “You, the team, you’ve made me who I am. But me and Ava. I have to give us a fair shot.”
“And that’s what makes you an honorable man. Whatever happens, whether you’re serving or not, we’re tied by more than duty. We’re tied by blood, by sweat, by vows. The brotherhood holds true,” Savino said.
“Damn,” Jared breathed, swiping a fake tear from his cheek. “Did you practice that speech? It was pretty sweet.”
“Kiss ass, MacGyver,” Nic said, laughing. “Let’s go make sure Ramsey is secured and on his way. Then we’ll head back to the cabin. You have a report to make and Rembrandt here has some issues to settle.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
AVA PACED FROM one end of the kitchen to the other, stopping every few steps to look out the window.
Something was going on.
Ty Loudon, Beau Danby, Mason Powers and Levar Kane made up what Nic called the second team. They’d arrived two hours ago, a couple of them offering a brief hello and Powers a friendly wave before they’d joined the kitchen powwow.
Ten minutes after that Elijah had told her goodbye, so Ava had missed whatever happened next, what with being busy sobbing her heart out. It wasn’t until Nic found her curled up on her bed, staring at the wall, that she’d realized that whatever their mission was, it was under way.
“Time to go, Cupcake,” he’d told her.
“Go?”
“You and Nathan are to be escorted to a safe location where he’ll be met by his mother.”
“And Elijah?”
Elijah was through talking with her. Nic’s expression hadn’t changed, but she’d seen it in his eyes.
“He indicated that your goodbyes were said.”
She’d lain there for a moment. Then, terrified but unable to convince herself to change her mind, she’d shaken her head. “I’m waiting here.”
“No, Ava. You’re leaving with Nathan in ten minutes.”
“No, Nic. I’m not. I’m waiting here for Elijah.”
He’d stared, long and hard, then asked one word. “Okay. But why?”
Ava still didn’t know. Nic had let her sidestep the question then had let her stay, but she knew she couldn’t dance around it for long. Not once Elijah was back. Maybe she just wanted to finish their discussion now, instead of later, she considered as she paced.
Then she overheard Aaron tell Nic that the hostile was spotted, a new target was in sight. Nic had stepped out of the kitchen just long enough to give her a hard look.
“Things are going down in a different direction than planned. I don’t have time to get you out of here. If I did, I’d be shorthanded.” His face was set, but she could see the worry in his eyes. “There’s a man on the door. You stay inside. If you step outside this building, you’ll be stepping into the line of fire. That means you stay indoors, you stay under wraps and you keep away from the windows.”
“Okay.” Ava swallowed hard. She’d never seen him look so tense.
“I shouldn’t have let you stay,” he muttered, looking as if he were going to send her packing despite the possibility of being a man short and out of time.
But Ava had left Elijah too many times in the past. She couldn’t now. She just couldn’t. “You can trust me, Nic,” she promised. “I’ll stay here, I’ll follow directions. I won’t endanger your mission.”
After a long look, first at her and then at his watch, he nodded. “One step out that door before I return, and you’ll be putting our lives in danger,” Nic said, one hand on the doorknob, the other on the gun at his hip. “Including Prescott.”
“I’ll wait here,” she said, chin high as she bit her lip to keep from screaming at him to protect Elijah.
An excruciating half hour had passed since then, and she wasn’t sure how much longer she could bottle those screams. She paced. She fidgeted. She sat, tapped her foot, then jumped up again. She paced to the far end of the living room, carefully peering out the window. Nothing but nature.
She paced to the other end to stare out the window by the kitchen entrance. She could see the detached garage flanked by a pair of benches, a few squirrels scampering around, and a whole lot of emptiness.
God. What were they doing out there? How long did she have to wait to find out?
Ava pressed her fingers against her eyes, trying to relieve the pressure building behind her brain. What was Elijah going to say when he saw she hadn’t left? Worse, when he realized she still hadn’t made any decisions about their relationship. What did she do now?
She wanted air. She wanted sound. She was tempted to turn on the radio, but was afraid to miss hearing anything important. Like, maybe a bird sending up a signal on Elijah’s status.
Rolling her eyes at herself, Ava puffed out a breath and tried to massage the tension out of her stomach. But it was knotted too tight. She wanted air. She wanted to go outside, but she’d promised Nic she wouldn’t.
Yoga, she decided. She’d do yoga. It was that, or start pulling her hair out, one yank at a time.
Already dressed in loose-fitting capri pants, she tucked her tank top into the waistband, slipped out of her shoes and took a deep breath. She put all her thoughts toward centering herself as she moved through the series of vinyasa poses, flowing from one stance to the next on each breath.
“Peace,” she breathed in dolphin pose. Be at peace.
Plank to downward facing dog.
Ce
nter, faith, confidence.
Cobra to twisting lunge.
Center, faith, love.
Arrow lunge to triangle to interlock warrior.
Center, faith, Elijah.
Pigeon pose, hold, to savasana.
Ava lay flat on the floor, eyes closed as her breath released, the last of the pent-up fear releasing with it. There, she breathed, a smile sliding over her face. She’d found her center. Now she could figure out the rest.
Opening her eyes, Ava pushed into a handstand, this time from joy, then flipped out to her feet. A second to be sure of her balance and she was ready.
Snapping up the bottle of water she’d left on a nearby table, Ava offered a finger wave to Powers, the SEAL Elijah always called Flipper, who stood guard just outside the door, giving her a what-the-hell-are-you-doing look.
She was getting past the fear, she realized. She’d spent years learning to control her body, to be strong. This was why. Now she could do that thinking Elijah had asked of her.
Preferring movement as often as possible, she continued to pace, sipping water and debating her options. Would it make her life happy if she and Elijah were back together, with him still serving in Special Ops? Off on death-defying missions, risking everything for something he’d never be able to tell her about.
Would her life be happier if they were together and he stayed in the military, but downgraded so he wasn’t always off on those dangerous, body-scarring missions?
Or would everything be peachy keen if he left altogether, moved up to Napa and got a normal job, the kind that had him home at the dinner table each night? She wrinkled her nose as she tried to imagine year after year of that, the two of them kicking back after a meal, their feet up on the couch. She could easily see them rolling around naked on the couch, but not the rest.
Elijah wasn’t made for normal. It was a total waste of what made him so special. And the bottom line was, she wanted Elijah.
So the question wasn’t whether she could live with him. It was whether she could live without him.
Feeling actually ready to make a welcome-home feast for the men now that she wasn’t afraid she’d burn the place down, Ava turned toward the kitchen.