by Sandy James
But that would be a lie. Beth might be packing for Emma to visit Darren for a week, but she knew things had changed permanently. Soon she’d be sending her daughter to live with him forever.
She sniffed hard, willing herself to stay strong and not give in to the urge to wail like a banshee at the unfairness of things. Life wasn’t fair, and she’d been nothing but an utter fool to always think things turned out for the best, that everything happened for a good reason. How could losing Emma ever be “for the best”? What “good reason” could steal a baby from her home?
“Well?” Jules said. “What’s the skinny? Other than Mallory?” She tossed her friend a wink.
“The judge made her ruling today,” Dani answered.
“Today?” Jules asked. “I thought she was going to rule Friday. Don’t you have another court date?”
“Not anymore,” Beth mumbled, mostly to herself.
Jules put her hands on her hips. “So is anyone going to tell me what she said? Or are we going to play Twenty Questions?”
“We’re still waiting for Beth to tell us,” Mallory replied. Then she inclined her head at the stuffed duffel. “Although I think the fact that she’s packing says it all.”
Beth stopped shoving Emma’s clothes into the duffel and let her shoulders droop. “Since Darren’s new baby is due in two weeks, Judge Ramsey said he should have this week to spend with Emma.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dani asked. “That she’s only vacationing with him for a week and then she’s coming home?”
Beth shrugged. “Alexis says it’s only a temporary measure. After the week’s over, the judge will schedule us all back in court again for another hearing.”
Mallory folded her arms under her breasts and drummed her fingers on her bicep. “Is that good or bad news?”
All Beth did was shrug again, zip the duffel, and toss it next to the tote full of Emma’s favorite toys.
Dani went to her and put her arm over Beth’s shoulders. “We’re here, Beth.”
“I know. I just…” The words to explain her fear about giving Emma into Darren’s care wouldn’t come. Once he had her, he’d probably never give her back. Court or no court.
“You’re worried,” Dani said. “Totally understandable.”
“You haven’t lost her for good,” Jules added. “This is just a visit. Right?”
“That’s what Alexis said,” Beth replied. “One week with Darren, then back to us.” But she knew better. The simple fact that the judge pushed for this extended visit so darn quick spoke volumes.
Darren would eventually be granted full parental rights, and she and Robert would be demoted to the aunt and uncle who only got to see Emma from time to time.
Mallory looked around before knitting her brows. “Where’s Robert?”
“Tracy Barrett’s in town,” Jules replied before Beth could. “The closing on the house Robert built for her is tomorrow, so he’s doing the final walk-through with her and Connor.”
The house was Robert’s masterpiece—a true mansion. Cloverleaf’s first. The CEO of Barrett Foods was in the process of building a new manufacturing plant close to town, and Jules and Connor had chatted Robert up to Tracy to help her build the kind of home she wanted but could never find in a town the size of Cloverleaf.
Beth had chosen all the fixtures based on pictures Tracy and Jules e-mailed her. She was very proud of how it had turned out, but her heart was too heavy to even care what Tracy thought when she saw the place. Nothing mattered except holding herself together until Beth could surrender her daughter to Darren later that afternoon.
“He should be here,” Mallory said.
Beth shook her head. “This is too important to blow off. Tracy has sent him a lot of work.”
“She not only hired him for her house,” Jules added, “but he’s building several for her executives as well.”
Business had picked up considerably with the warmth of May, and Robert sometimes worked sixty hours a week now. That hadn’t been a problem since Beth was on summer break. They’d even talked about her taking a year off to just be with Emma while she was still a baby. Money wasn’t a problem, something they’d hoped would strengthen their adoption petition.
None of it mattered now. They’d see Emma a couple of weekends a month for a while. Then she’d have friends and activities, and she’d eventually realize she didn’t have enough time for Aunt Beth and Uncle Robert. Just like Robert would have less and less time for Beth once the child he’d considered his daughter was no longer a part of their lives. Maybe he was already pulling back by working so many hours a week.
His own words condemned their marriage. He’d stated in open court that he’d only married her to help with Emma’s adoption. Once Emma was gone, the marriage would end. Beth wasn’t about to hold Robert to a commitment he’d made for all the wrong reasons. No, she would set him free. Even if it tore her heart out. Words of love uttered in the heat of the moment didn’t hold anywhere near the weight of those spoken under oath in a courtroom.
She’d been honest with the judge when she’d said they’d married to strengthen the adoption petition. Had the judge questioned her further, Beth would have acknowledged that she’d loved Robert for the longest time. But she’d never had the opportunity.
The normally optimistic Beth would’ve thought that her husband might have had the same problem—being constrained by the limited amount of time to answer the judge’s questions. But all her optimism had evaporated.
“Beth, stop.” Dani squeezed her shoulders. “I can see how much this is killing you, but you’ve got to try to look on the bright side.”
Anger rose up inside Beth, and she lashed out. Jerking out of Dani’s hold, she leveled a hard glare at her friends. “Bright side? Where is the fucking bright side here? He’s taking my daughter and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it!”
Emma woke with a start. She sat up and blinked a few times before her bottom lip began to quiver.
Beth scooped her daughter into her arms. “I’m going to change her diaper and get her ready to go now.” She didn’t want to order the Ladies out of her house, but she hoped they’d get the hint when she stomped up the stairs to Emma’s room.
* * *
Robert sat in Alexis’s waiting room for what seemed like the millionth time. So much time spent hoping they could truly make Emma their daughter. All of it wasted.
Beth was supposed to be bringing Emma here to hand her over to Darren. Despite the constant mental reminders that Emma would only be gone a week, Robert was having problems controlling his panic. He was responsible for Emma’s safety and well-being. Turning those jobs over to someone else made his stomach lurch.
Emma needed him, just as much as he needed her.
And what about Beth? How devastated would she be to lose her daughter, the only part of her dead sister she could hold on to?
Alexis hadn’t arrived yet. Her assistant had offered him a drink, but after he’d snapped at her, she’d retreated to her desk and stayed quite busy. He couldn’t blame her. He’d been an ogre. Hearing Beth’s voice in his head, scolding him, he’d offered her a muttered apology. From the lack of reaction, the woman hadn’t even heard him.
After checking his watch yet again, he let out a weighty sigh. Although Tracy had been very pleased with the way her house turned out, Robert hadn’t taken the time to absorb her praise. Once Beth had called to tell him about the judge’s unusual ruling, he’d been obsessed with getting to her and Emma.
The outer door opened, and Alexis strolled in. “Robert,” she said with a nod. “I’d say it’s good to see you, but I’m afraid you’d see right through me. C’mon into my office.” She handed her bag to her assistant. “Please transfer the Hart deposition into his file. It’s on the pin drive.”
“Yes, ma’am,” the assistant replied.
Robert followed Alexis into her office, sitting himself down on one of the client chairs opposite her desk. She slipped
behind the desk and plopped onto her chair.
“Beth’s on her way,” he said, hating the silence. The only thing that had been missing to make the wait sheer torture was a loud clock ticking away the seconds.
“Good. I checked my voice mail after I parked my car. Darren and Kelly should be here soon as well.”
Since she seemed to be in a talkative mood, he couldn’t help but ask the question that had bugged him from the moment Beth called. “Why?”
Alexis cocked her head. “Why what? Why this sudden visitation?”
He nodded.
“To be honest, I haven’t the faintest idea. The timing seems… odd. But I learned a long time ago Judge Ramsey has a method to her madness. I just haven’t figured out what she’s trying to accomplish with this particular bout of insanity.”
The door to the office opened, and Beth came in. Emma was awake. When her gaze caught Robert’s, she started squirming and reaching for him. “Bobber! Want Bobber!”
Robert stood and reached for her when Beth came to him. “Hey, squirt.” It felt damned good to hold her. How was he ever going to find the strength to surrender his daughter to Darren Brown?
“Alexis,” Beth began, “I don’t understand this at all. What exactly did the judge say?”
“When I talked to her, she seemed to think Darren would have his hands full when Kelly delivers. She said that Emma deserved to spend some time getting to know her biological father without him having to spend an inordinate amount of time with his newborn.” With a sigh, Alexis added, “I’ll be honest with you both. I’ve never heard of a ruling like this before, especially when Judge Ramsey didn’t so much as hint about what she’s decided about permanent custody.”
Shifting Emma to his hip, Robert shook his head. “You’re wrong. I think she spoke loud and clear about this. She’s giving all consideration to Darren and none to us.”
“Not necessarily,” Alexis countered. “She told me she needs more time and a chance to hear from the CPS home investigator before she’ll decide anything permanent.”
“CPS was at our place days ago,” Beth said, passing Emma’s blanket to Robert. “They haven’t been to Darren’s yet?”
Alexis shook her head. “They’ll go sometime in the week Emma’s in his care. They need to see the environment he’s providing for her and how they interact with each other. Then they’ll file both reports with Judge Ramsey.”
Robert focused on soothing his girls. Emma was clingy today, not a surprise considering the tension in the room. Beth, on the other hand, seemed as cold and stiff as a block of ice.
Keeping a steady arm around Emma, he tried to drape his other arm across his wife’s shoulder, but she shrugged him away, as if his touch bothered her instead of strengthened her. While he wanted to whisper words of comfort, he had none. They were both hurting and should be leaning on each other. Instead, their new rift grew by the minute. So did his frustration. And his anger at the way his wife was shutting him out.
“I’m s-sick of that bastard,” Robert said, his voice rising with his emotions. “Absolutely sick. I wish we could stop all this n-nonsense and raise our daughter in peace.”
* * *
Beth frowned at Robert. Couldn’t he see the anger in his voice was disturbing Emma?
This situation wasn’t any easier on her than it was on him, but she hadn’t been reduced to shouting every word. Alexis wasn’t to blame for this, and she didn’t deserve his disdain. “Stop it,” Beth scolded.
His eyes narrowed at her. “Stop what? Trying to keep my daughter with me?” He tossed his head at the duffel she’d dropped on the floor. “Looks to me like you’re already rolling over and playing dead. Hell, you’ve sent enough for her to m-move permanently instead of a week.”
Clenching her hands into fists, she refused to let him yell at her just because he was upset. “I sent enough in case they don’t have a washer or dryer. I didn’t want them to have to go to a Laundromat for Emma. I’ll wash her stuff when she gets home.” The fact that he didn’t even look contrite made her angrier. “I don’t want her to go, either. But you don’t hear me screaming at Alexis as if this is her fault.”
“I wasn’t screaming.”
“Beth. Robert.” Alexis gestured to the chairs. “Why don’t you both have a seat and calm down?” She pulled her chair closer to her desk and folded her hands, resting them on the glass surface. “I know how hard this is on both of you. You know I’ll do everything I can to maximize your time with Emma, and I still have some hope that Judge Ramsey might put her with you as guardians. But for Emma’s sake, you can’t take out your hurt and anger on each other—or on Darren when he arrives. We need to keep things civil.”
Beth nodded, although she wasn’t surprised that all Robert did was growl.
The door to the office opened, and Alexis’s assistant led Darren Brown inside.
“Mr. Brown.” Alexis stood and strode to greet him with a handshake. “Isn’t Kelly with you?”
“She’s waiting at home.” He shifted his gaze to Emma. “Is she ready to go?”
“Her car seat’s in my car,” Beth said. “I can go get—”
“I’ve already got one.”
Beth lifted the heavy duffel. “I packed a lot of clothes. You don’t need to worry about washing anything. Just send them home with her next week and—”
“My maid can handle her laundry. I’ve got this.”
Why was he being such a jerk? “I really don’t mind. She tends to get a rash if you use—”
“I said I can handle it.” Darren strode to Robert. “Give me my daughter.”
Emma was gripping her blanket with one hand and sucking on her thumb. Until Darren reached for her. Then she let out a shrill scream, dropped the blanket, and started squirming against Robert as though climbing him like a tree. “No!”
“C’mon, Emma,” Darren coaxed, finally easing his rough tone. “Come with Daddy.”
Hearing Darren call himself that was as dissonant as nails dragged down a chalkboard.
Emma had developed a rather severe stranger anxiety, and the harder Darren tried to grab her, the more she clung to Robert. It wasn’t as if Robert was making it any easier for Darren, but Beth couldn’t fault him for his need to protect her.
“Are you going to give her to me?” Darren asked Robert. “Or do we have to play tug-of-war for her?”
Eyes brimming with tears, Robert gently pried Emma’s chubby fingers from his shirt. As he helped guide her into Darren’s arms, he swallowed hard.
“Bobber!” Emma screamed as Darren held tight and snatched up her duffel. “Want Bobber!”
Robert put his hand over his eyes and turned his back.
Emma’s panicked eyes caught Beth’s. “Matka! Want Matka!”
“Em…” Beth took a step closer. “Come to Mat—”
“No!” Darren ordered. “You’ll just make it harder.” He stomped to the door, which suddenly opened. The assistant, no doubt. “She’ll be fine once you’re both out of sight.” And then he stepped out of the office.
Emma’s voice rang loud and clear one last time. “Want Matka!”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Beth was getting sick and tired of Robert staring at her as if he thought she was about to explode, especially since he was the one more likely to blow up. All she felt was numb. Resigned. Dead.
They’d barely said a word since they got home, which was probably a good thing. Their emotions were running high, and words spoken in anger would be more destructive than constructive. Perhaps withdrawing was how Robert handled rough situations. Even though they were married, they really didn’t know each other well at all.
She put the supper dishes in the dishwasher after she’d packed away the remaining food. She’d only picked at the stuff they’d bought at the Chicken Shack. Their extra-crunchy chicken tenders were one of her favorite guilty pleasures, but nothing she tried to eat had any taste tonight. That, and her stomach was tied in nervous knots as she worri
ed about Emma. If she ate anything, she’d probably just throw it right back up.
Her daughter’s screams still echoed in Beth’s mind. A remorseful chuckle slipped out at the thought that Emma had finally called her Matka, but it had been on the worst day of Beth’s life. A hollow victory at best.
Robert grabbed a beer and then shut the refrigerator door. He popped the cap off the longneck bottle and took a pull of his Budweiser as he rested his shoulder against the fridge and just watched her.
After drying her hands, Beth set the dishtowel aside and turned to face him, folding her arms over her chest and leaning back against the counter. His close scrutiny made her uncomfortable, so she stared at the floor. Seconds clicked by with agonizing slowness.
Had it only been a couple of hours since they’d lost Emma? Seemed like years.
“I’m sure she’s fine,” Robert said before taking another swig of his beer.
Beth just nodded, although she wasn’t sure of anything, especially whether Emma had eaten a decent supper, or if someone was checking her diaper, or if she’d even stopped crying yet. Would Darren or Kelly know how to comfort her? Would Emma even allow herself to be comforted? She hated strangers, and despite the biological connection that had let Darren take Emma away, that’s all the two of them were to that beautiful little girl. Strangers.
An elephant stood between Beth and Robert in the gorgeous kitchen they’d designed together. Since he wasn’t mentioning the obvious, she wouldn’t, either. But ignoring it wasn’t going to make the agony disappear. The fact they had absolutely nothing to say to each other now proved what Beth had feared all along. Without Emma, there was no marriage.
“If you don’t need me, um, I was going to go out with B-Ben tonight,” Robert said. “We want to see if Charlie Barker’s got anything n-new this week.”
Charlie Barker. Cloverleaf’s guru of resale. Robert and Ben relied on Charlie to supply hard-to-find items, everything from claw-foot bathtubs to antique chandeliers. The man scoured everything from estate sales to junkyards to find items that builders and contractors could use. Buying stuff from Charlie had saved Ashford Homes a lot of money, and Robert relied on him. Besides, going to his place was probably a great excuse for Robert to get away from the overwhelming tension of the day.