by Joan Holub
“Did not.”
“Did too. You should have hit the thieves, not their dog.”
And with that the three Furies began fighting among themselves. They whipped their snakes around, clawing at one another.
“See?” Hades panted to Zeus as they continued to run. “This is why I liked it in Cronus’s belly. No Creatures of Chaos. No Titans. No trouble. But then you had to come along and free us.”
“It was a prison!” said Zeus.
“It was better than being chased by Furies,” insisted Hades.
“True,” Poseidon agreed. “In the king’s belly we only had to dodge the occasional fish bone or incoming Olympian. I’m still glad we’re out, though.”
“Well, I’m not.” Hades frowned at Zeus. “And Hera’s right. You are bossy!”
And just like that, the boys started fighting too.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Tag! You’re Dead.
Stop it, you dweebs!” Hera yelled at the three boys.
But the Furies’ anger seemed to have infected them. The boys began throwing punches. Poseidon swung his trident. Zeus drew his bolt. Hades snatched the helm from Zeus and slung it at the other two.
As they all struck out at the same time, the three objects they held connected. Zap! Fizz! Zing!
Suddenly the thunderbolt sparked with wild electricity. The spark spread to the trident and then the helm. All three began to glow with a magical golden light. Then the helm transformed before Hades’ eyes, flashing with jewels. He dropped it like a hot potato.
Surprised, the boys jumped apart. Instantly the spark of magic faded.
“What just happened?” Hades wondered.
“Yeah, I thought you said your weapons’ magic didn’t work in the Underworld,” said Demeter.
“It didn’t. Until now,” said Poseidon. “When they touched.”
Before Hades could grab the helm from the ground, the dog dashed over and made off with it. No one else seemed to have noticed the flash of jewels, Hades realized. And the jewels were gone now. What was going on here?
“It may have been magic, but it was weak,” said Zeus. “Not powerful enough to defeat those Furies.”
“Well, that’s really too bad,” said Hera, pointing upward. “Because they’ve stopped fighting now. And it looks like they’re coming in for the kill!”
Zeus, the Olympians, and the dog took off running again. They were right behind the Titans.
Sulfur smoke was all around them now. The pit of Tartarus lay dead ahead. The Furies were herding them into it! But at the last second the winged creatures backed off, circling overhead again. Zeus and the others stopped on the brink of the pit, huddling together.
“We have decided to give you a task as punishment,” announced Pointy-Boots.
“Evildoers always fail at our tasks,” said Pointy-Nose.
Pointy-Ears nodded. “So we’ll figure out who’s lying soon enough.”
“I’ll choose the task,” said Pointy-Nose. “I’m very creative when it comes to punishments. Remember the time I put a pox on—”
“Ack! I’m the creative one,” interrupted Pointy-Boots. “Remember the never-ending task of sorting asphodel seeds I gave those shades last month? Now that was creative!”
“It’s nothing compared to what I did to those troublemaking shades last week,” insisted Pointy-Ears. “Making them balance for hours on their heads and say tongue twisters while I tickled their feet with a feather? Classic.”
Their captives listened in horror.
“I feel kind of woozy,” said Demeter.
“Me too,” said Poseidon.
Zeus stared into the pit of Tartarus. “I think it’s the stinky sulfur fumes coming from down there.”
Oceanus nodded, and Mnemosyne fanned her nose.
“I like the stink,” said Hades. “It helps me think. And here’s what I’m thinking now: Since those Furies are trying to one-up one another with punishment ideas, I say we give them an idea of our own.”
He winked at Zeus. Then he said extra loudly, “I hope the Furies don’t choose a game as our task. Games terrify me. Especially a game like, um—”
“Tag?” suggested Zeus.
“Right,” said Hades. Then he hissed at the others, “C’mon. Pretend you’re scared of tag.”
“Oh, no! Not a game of tag!” wailed Hera, catching on.
She elbowed Poseidon, prompting him to add, “Um, yeah, not tag!”
“Please, we beg of you,” Demeter shouted. “Anything but that!”
As the Furies gathered to whisper together in midair, the Titans didn’t speak. But the two of them were looking mighty nervous.
Then the Furies began to fly in circles again. Pointy-Boots peered down at all of them. “We have decided your punishment!” she proclaimed. “You must survive a game of tag. With Thanatos.”
“Doesn’t sound bad,” Hera murmured.
“Yeah, I’m good at tag,” Demeter whispered back.
Zeus nodded. “Me too.” He’d outrun hundreds of thunderbolts back home on the Greek island of Crete. For some reason, until he'd gotten Bolt, thunderbolts had always been out to get him.
“This’ll be a cinch,” Poseidon added.
“You think so?” scoffed Mnemosyne. Watching the three Furies still circling high overhead, she looked terrified.
She must know something that the rest of us don’t, thought Zeus. It didn’t take long to find out what that was.
Suddenly the Furies chanted: “Come forth, Thanatos, Bringer of Death!”
Zeus, the Titans, and his companions all looked at one another. That did not sound good.
“I have come!” boomed a voice in immediate reply. A man appeared from the gloom overhead and slowly sank to the ground.
No taller than a mortal man, he wore a billowing cape as gray as fog. Its hood hung low on his head, so you couldn’t see his face. Except for his eerie smile.
Thanatos bowed to the Furies. “Ladies, I’m honored you have chosen me to execute this punishment. He grinned. And I do mean execute. There’s nothing I like better than a game of Tag! You’re Dead.” He rubbed his hands together and scanned his victims.
Zeus gulped. “You mean if you tag us, we fall down dead? Really and truly dead? Never-leave-the-Underworld-again dead?”
“You got it,” said Thanatos. That creepy smile of his got even wider. He whipped his arms high and began whirling in a circle. This sent a gust of wind whooshing their way. It blew all seven of them—and the dog—into the pit of Tartarus.
And then they were falling. Not at normal speed but in slow motion, like they were in a dream. Or more like a nightmare. They went deeper and deeper and deeper.
When they landed at the bottom of the pit, the dragon dog dropped the helm. Before Hades could grab it, the dog snatched it up again and galloped off.
“Come back here, you crazy dragon dog!” he called. The smell of sulfur was thick around them. It seemed to have killed off the fleas. But though the dog had stopped scratching, it was too busy investigating everything to obey orders. And it still had the helm in its jaws.
Just then Thanatos dropped down into the pit too. When his feet touched the ground, he spoke to them in his eerie voice. “Game’s on! Better start running.”
And with that, the most terrifying game of tag ever played began. Thanatos was “it” and he chased them all, swooping and diving.
The Olympians and Titans slipped and slid in ooky globs of swampy stuff, trying to get away from him. Tartarus was even gloomier and stinkier than all they’d seen before in the Underworld. No flowers, trees, or plants grew here. Their only hiding places were behind sharp obsidian rocks that jutted from the ground like tombstones.
And the dog was no help to them. He kept bounding around the pit, acting like he thought this new game was all in fun.
The three boys and two girls spread out, each taking cover as best they could. So did the Titans.
“Thanatos is toying with us,” Zeus tol
d Hades as he ran past him. “I’m sure he’s hoping we’ll get tired sooner or later. Then he’ll move in for the tag—er, kill.”
A few minutes later Hades spotted Hera a dozen feet away. She was crouched behind a lava rock. Thanatos was sneaking up on her, looking like he meant business.
“Run, Hera!” Hades cried out.
Thanatos whipped around. Hera escaped. But now Thanatos set his sights on Hades instead.
Feeling powerless to help, Zeus watched Hades face off against the hooded Death guy. Slowly Hades was forced into a corner between two large hunks of rock.
“Back off,” Hades told Thanatos. But the tremor in his voice betrayed his fear.
Grinning, the Bringer of Death crept closer. His long gray fingers reached out. They came closer. And closer. Until a gray fingertip was only an inch away from Hades’ cheek.
“Tag,” Thanatos whispered softly. “You’re—”
CHAPTER NINE
Lord of the Underworld
But Thanatos never got to finish saying, You’re dead.
Just as he was about to tag Hades, the dog made that gurgle again. “Sir. Brr. Us.” He jerked his chin up, flinging the helm in a high arc through the air.
Hades stretched out his arm and grabbed the helm as it zoomed by. The moment he touched it, the helm transformed into a dazzling jeweled crown!
Seeing this, Thanatos stopped dead still. So did Hades. So did everyone else. They all stared at the crown in amazement.
So I wasn’t imagining the flash of gold and jewels when I touched the helm before, thought Hades. Quickly he set the crown on top of his head. “Am I invisible?”
“Yes!” Zeus called to him.
As the Olympians and Titans gathered around, Thanatos bowed low to Hades. That is, to the empty spot where he’d just been standing. “All hail the lord of the Underworld!”
“Who, me?” Hades’ voice asked in surprise. Thanatos nodded.
Hades removed the helm and examined it. It remained golden and jeweled. He set it on a rock. It turned back into a plain helmet. He picked it up again. Crown.
“So that’s why that dog likes you,” said Hera. “You’re the lord of the Underworld!”
“And that must be why the sulfur in this world makes you think better,” added Zeus.
“And why you like stink,” Poseidon added.
“I am your servant,” Thanatos said humbly to Hades. “What would you bid me do?”
“How about you call off this game?” Hades suggested. He put the helm crown on again, going invisible.
The crown, the invisibility, and the knowledge that he was lord of the Underworld seemed to make him feel suddenly powerful. “And keep your fog fingers off my friends from now on,” he added.
“Yeah,” said Zeus. To show support he and Poseidon came up to stand on either side of Hades. (At least they thought they were probably on either side of him.) Hera and Demeter joined them.
“Your wish is my command, O lord of the Underworld,” said Thanatos.
Just then the Furies appeared overhead. They flew above the group in the pit like vultures circling their prey.
“Lord of the Underworld? No way! They have tricked you, Thanatos,” said Pointy-Ears.
“You’re wrong,” Thanatos replied. “The invisible boy is the one we’ve awaited—the true lord of this world!”
Hades took the helm off, showing them the fabulous crown it became in his hands.
“It’s just some sort of magic spell,” said Pointy-Boots.
“Punishment must be served,” added Pointy-Nose.
The Furies zoomed on the currents of sulfurous air, cackling and loudly flapping their wings.
“Duck! They’re going to attack!” yelled Hera.
Hades thrust his arm up, holding the helm high. “Zeus, draw your bolt,” he commanded. “Poseidon, hold up your trident.”
“What about us?” Hera asked.
“Yeah,” said Demeter. “What should we do?”
“Um . . . slap hands with us,” Hades told her. “Now let’s high-five!”
At his command five hands (three of them holding powerful, magical objects) touched as one. Zap! Fizz! Zing! Slap! Slap!
Instantly the bolt, trident, and helm all sizzled with a tremendous power the likes of which they’d never before seen.
“Flippin’ fish sticks!” Poseidon yelled.
“Helmtastic!” cheered Hades.
“Thunderation!” exclaimed Zeus.
“Amazing!” Hera shouted.
“Awesome!” said Demeter.
The five of them broke apart, staring breathlessly at one another. Stunned by this display of power, Mnemosyne and Oceanus cringed in fear. Even the circling Furies now seemed impressed.
“What just happened?” asked Hades.
“Teamwork,” Mnemosyne pronounced in an awed tone. “Your magic. It’s bolstered through the power of teamwork.”
“It appears that these Olympians are even stronger than King Cronus feared,” Oceanus murmured to her.
“Strong enough that they overcame the Underworld’s resistance to Earth magic,” said Thanatos, sounding impressed. “Normally the sulfur here drains away the power of all magic that enters the Underworld from the Earth realm. Prevents shades from sneaking in magical weapons.”
Pointing toward the Furies, Hades shouted a bold command to the Titans. “Tell them the truth. Tell them you were lying before.”
Mnemosyne and Oceanus looked at each other. Then Oceanus shrugged and gazed up at the Furies. “All right. We admit it. We stole the helm.”
The Furies gasped. In awe of Hades now, they fell all over themselves trying to please him.
“Oh, let me be the one to punish the Titans for stealing your crown, lord of the Underworld,” begged Pointy-Boots. “If it is your wish, I can peck out the eyes of these thieves in less than three seconds.”
“I can scratch them to ribbons in two seconds,” Pointy-Ears put in quickly.
“That’s nothing! In one second I can give them a pox that will make them itch as if bitten by a thousand fire ants!” claimed Pointy-Nose.
Yet another pox, thought Zeus. Must be her specialty.
“Uh, okay, good to know,” Hades told them. “For now, though, maybe you could just stick these two Titans someplace secure in Tartarus. Someplace they will never escape from.”
The Furies gleefully carried out his orders, herding Mnemosyne and Oceanus off. After they were gone, everything got quiet.
“Now what?” asked Hera.
“We go back to Earth,” said Zeus.
“How?” asked Poseidon.
“Allow me to assist,” said Thanatos.
Zeus looked over, surprised to see he was still there.
Thanatos clapped his pale hands together. Whoosh! A chariot drawn by four black horses appeared alongside them. The group of five quickly boarded it.
“Upon your return to the Underworld one day in the future, we will hold a coronation ceremony and show you to your throne,” Thanatos told Hades.
“Throne?” Hera echoed. “He gets a crown and a throne?”
“Well, he is lord of the Underworld,” Thanatos told her. “And that’s what the god of this world is supposed to get.”
“I guess,” Hera said, pouting.
Hades bid farewell to Thanatos, who was staying behind. Then he patted the dragon dog on each of its three heads in turn.
“Sir. Brr. Us,” the dog gurgled happily.
“I think I’ll name you Cerberus,” Hades told the dog. “Since that’s what you’re always saying. And since it looks like you’re going to be mine after all. What do you think, boy?”
The dog licked Hades’ face with all three of his tongues.
“I think he likes it,” Demeter teased.
Hades smiled. “Be a good boy, Cerberus. Thanatos will take you out of the pit. And I’ll come back soon.”
Then Hades called to the horses. “Away!” he commanded. And just like that, the chariot lifted
off.
“Hey, I just thought of a joke Charon would love,” Hades announced as they began to rise. “Why did the chariot wheel come loose?” Then he supplied the answer before anyone could guess. “Because it needed to be Titaned.”
Laughter filled the chariot as it took them higher. Soon they were out of the pit of Tartarus. Only a thick layer of dirt and rock overhead separated them from the surface of the Earth above. But as they approached the rock full speed, the chariot didn’t slow.
“Stop! We’re going to crash!” Zeus yelled as they rose perilously close. Some of the others gasped or screamed.
Crack! A hole magically opened in the layer of dirt and rock above them. The chariot cut through it. They were out of the Underworld!
They touched down safely on the hill overlooking the River Styx. Right where the boys’ journey had begun that very morning.
The minute they all stepped down from the chariot, two things happened. The horse-drawn chariot headed back to Tartarus. And Poseidon’s memory returned.
“Right foot. Left foot! I remember everything again!” he said in a delighted voice. As his words died away, a cloud of glittery mist appeared before them.
“Pythia!” Zeus exclaimed.
Demeter gaped as a face framed by long black hair appeared within the mist.
“Oracle,” Hera told her before she could ask questions. “I’ll explain later.”
CHAPTER TEN
Olympians, One and All
The oracle’s face glowed within the mist. She blinked as she took off her fogged glasses to polish them. Then she put them back on.
“Congratulations, Demeter, Hades, Hera, Poseidon, and Zeus.” The oracle smiled at each of them in turn as she spoke their names. “You have succeeded in your quest. The Helm of Darkness is now in the right hands.”
“You mean on the right head,” said Hades’ voice.
Zeus looked around. Where was he? Then Hades reappeared behind him, holding the jeweled helm. He’d slipped it on for fun.
Pythia gave him a slight bow. “I hail you, lord of the Underworld. It is good and just that you have regained your rightful throne.”