“Certainly. And as they say—do not be a stranger here.”
Pat Kelly wound up carrying all Lily’s packages while leading her carefully through the streets to the door of the Haven. They covered most of the distance in silence, but at the end Pat leaned close to say, “I could not help overhearing your conversation with my wife. I would not have you misunderstand. I may have been designed for murderous rather than sexual purposes. My creators did, in fact, omit the organ necessary for intercourse. That does not mean I am unable to provide my wife pleasure.”
“I understand, Pat.”
“What I am trying to say, Miss Lily, is those such as you and I are capable of love. And love will always find a way.”
****
“You’re being released. It seems the fellow who identified you as the delivery man in the steamcab heist has gone missing. We’ve searched half the city and can’t come up with him. So no lineup, and we can’t hold you. The powers that be have decided they can’t prosecute without his testimony in court, and there’s no other evidence.” Brendan Fagan, who had come to the cells in person to deliver the news, narrowed his gaze on Reynold. “You wouldn’t be knowing anything about his disappearance, would you?”
Not unless prayer worked a hell of a lot better than Reynold expected. Aloud he said, “How could I? I’ve been in here—how long?”
“Three days. Well, you’re getting out now. But you’re to stay on hand if we have further questions—or if the witness turns up. Right?”
“Just let me go.” Before he went insane. He felt dirty, sore, desperate, and beside himself with worry about Lily. He never wanted to see another steamcab and was sorry he’d ever heard of Vern Schultz. He wanted a bath and a good night’s sleep.
But not before he saw Lily.
He left the jail and loped through streets crowded at the height of the afternoon. Dodging children, peddlers with handcarts, horses, and the dreaded steamcabs, he at last reached the Haven for Disadvantaged Women, only to be met with Mrs. Gideon’s regretful refusal.
“She’s not here. But she’s going to be very happy to see you. What happened to keep you away so long?”
Reynold ignored the question. “Not here? Where is she?”
“With some good friends, Pat and Rose Kelly. I’ll give you the directions.” Her frank gaze moved over him. “You might want to get cleaned up first.”
“You’re sure she’s safe?”
“She was when Pat collected her this morning. He’s…”
“I know who he is.” Reynold drew a deep breath that felt like his first in days. “All right, I’ll go home first and get out of these filthy clothes. I was in some trouble, but I think I’ve pulled clear of it now.”
“I hope so.” She looked stern. “Because Lily’s depending on you. It’s no time for you to muck about, as my husband would say.”
“I understand that. Thank you for all your help.”
She jotted an address on a scrap of paper taken from her pocket, and he was off again, running through the bright sunshine. He wondered what Liam thought and if he still had a job. He knew he should stop by the shop and see, but the desire to be with Lily drove him too hard.
At home, he stripped to the bare flesh and scrubbed down violently. In his scrap of mirror, he saw a stranger—wild-eyed, with a scraggly beard sprouting from his face and a gaunt, hungry look. Gazing into those crazed eyes, he asked himself a few hard questions: what did Lily see in him? What if she’d glommed onto him because he’d been the only man available? He had little enough to offer her; thick-headed and only poorly educated, he had trouble dogging his heels and might no longer possess a decent job. What if, out at liberty in the world all this time, she’d realized she could do very well without him?
Unable to look at the agony in his own eyes, he lowered his face to his hands and stood hunched over the chipped sink, wracked by pain. All he’d wanted the past three days was to see her. Now he wondered if he should.
Maybe he should do her a favor and disappear from her life.
Then again, maybe he should have the balls to tell her to her face.
He groaned and dressed slowly, his mind chasing the question all the while. Love meant sacrifice, didn’t it? Would he be willing to sacrifice his happiness for hers?
Yes. But it would hurt. Damn, it might near kill him.
Still on foot and cringing at the very sight of the steamcabs that clogged the streets, he made his way to the address Mrs. Gideon had given him. He stood on the curb a full five minutes before making up his mind whether to knock.
The door was opened by a tall woman with light brown hair and kind eyes. She gave him a swift onceover.
“Hello,” he began. “I’m…”
“The missing Reynold? Oh, thank goodness. Please come in.”
Reynold complied and stepped into the foyer. “I’m here to see…”
“Lily, yes. She’s been beside herself with worry for you. I’m Rose Kelly, by the way.”
The woman married to the automaton? Reynold stared at her.
But he had no opportunity to ask questions; Rose Kelly ushered him into a room to the left. He had a glimpse of Lily seated on a settee amid piles of books, with the automaton he recognized at Pat Kelly bent over her before Lily looked up and saw him. Books hit the floor with muted thuds as she leaped up and flew into his arms.
“Rey!”
He shut his eyes on a wave of bliss when his arms closed around her. Her now-familiar scent—that of hot metal mixed with sweet-smelling skin and hair—met his nostrils, and all his senses opened. She snuggled into him with one ear against his chest, listening to the heart that now galloped beneath his ribs, before lifting her face to his.
Bliss turned to something more as their lips met and the hot cavern of her mouth welcomed his tongue. One kiss turned to two, and he nearly forgot they had an audience.
How could he mind that? How care about anything but Lily?
A soft grinding noise recalled him to the moment. He broke contact with Lily and set her from him with gentle hands.
“Are you all right?”
“I am.” Her pale blue eyes searched his face. “But what of you? Where have you been?”
“I had a spot of trouble. Circumstances prevented me from coming to you. I’ll explain when—when we’re alone.”
“So long as you are here now. Please meet my new friends.” She tugged at his hand. “Pat and Rose Kelly. He’s an automaton, and she’s human. They are the ones you told me about, Rey—they are married.”
“I believe we’ve met, Officer Kelly, in front of the Crystal Palace.” Reynold extended his hand.
Kelly, who had a face like the map of Ireland, examined him frankly. “I remember. Reynold Michaels, is it? Miss Lily has been deeply concerned by your absence.”
“Has she?” Reynold gazed into Lily’s face again.
“Oh, yes,” she affirmed. “I could not imagine what would keep you from coming to find me as you promised.”
Reynold wasn’t about to explain it now. Kelly was a cop, and Reynold did not consider himself far enough out of trouble to go splashing details around.
Fortunately, Lily raced on, never letting go of his hand. “Pat and Rose have been so good to me, Rey. Pat can provide all the enzyme wash I need. And they have taught me a great deal in only a few days. Look at all the books! Pat says reading can help me understand what it is to be human. He says it’s like getting inside the head of a thousand men and women. Is that not a wonderful thing?”
Reynold could only echo, “Wonderful.” To Kelly and Rose he said, “Thank you for taking her under your wing.”
Rose smiled. “It’s been our pleasure. Lily is delightful company. Mr. Reynold, I don’t know where you’ve been these past days, but there are some things you should know. Lily’s former companion, Chastity, who is back in Dr. Landry’s hands, has been under repair. Pat’s been able to learn through the grapevine that Dr. Landry’s well on her way to a successful rest
art.”
“It begins with drying her out,” Kelly said somberly. “I know, firsthand, units such as Chastity can withstand a drenching. I myself once went over Niagara Falls with only minimal damage. When I was dried out and my boiler was restarted, I retained all my memories.”
“You’re saying Chastity will recall the part I played in getting her and Lily away.”
“I regret to say so.”
“Will this Dr. Landry be able to get the information out of her if she doesn’t want to tell?”
“I keep saying to Pat,” Lily put in, “Chastity will never betray us.”
“Not if she can help it,” Pat amended.
“What I think Pat means is she may have no choice.”
Pat nodded. “Dr. Landry created Chastity’s artificial intelligence and may well have full access to it. Unfortunately, that puts us—and Mrs. Gideon—in a bind. Having Lily in our company will be considered possession of stolen property. I am sorry, my dear, but under the law you have an owner. I do not see how to get past that.”
Oh, hell, Reynold thought. Out of the frying pan and into the fire.
Chapter Thirty-One
“Hold me Rey, please—closer. I want to feel your heart beat right through me. When I do, it feels as if I have a heart of my own.”
“I don’t think we can get much closer than this,” Reynold replied truthfully.
Lily considered it. Maybe he was right; he’d just finished emptying his seed inside her, and they remained joined, his body covering hers. She had her arms wrapped around him so she could absorb not only each heartbeat but his every breath. She wished she could remain like this forever, would ask nothing more.
She had insisted on accompanying him back to his room straight from the Kellys’, even though he said it wasn’t safe. Chastity knew the location of this place. At that moment she’d been willing to trade her safety to be with him. They’d tumbled onto the bed, where they now lay, and the shabby room became a mansion.
“Lily, we need to talk.”
“Yes, Rey.”
He withdrew from her gently and rested on his elbows to look at her. She loved the way he touched her naked body with his hands and his gaze, adored being unclothed beneath him. But trouble now filled his eyes.
“Are you going to tell me where you were?”
“Yes. In jail.”
She tipped her head on the pillow, searching out references. Reynold had loosened her hair, and it lay tangled around them. He had kissed it just before he entered her.
“Jail is an institution where criminals are held. You mentioned it before. But you are not a criminal.”
“Lily, I’ve done some things I’m not proud of, in order to be with you. I can’t tell you exactly what, because then it’s information the authorities might get out of you. And I can’t talk about it in front of Patrick Kelly because he’s a cop. But I was hauled in for theft. So if I’m found in possession of you, well, it’s like Kelly says. You’ll be considered property, and I won’t have a chance.”
“You’re saying I could prove dangerous to you.”
“Yes, very.”
She did not want to be a danger to him. And how could she be property when she had the ability to desire, and follow those desires? Humans had the right to choose; she did not. It always came back to her not being human.
“Rey, this is difficult for me to understand.”
“It’s hard for me to understand, too.”
“I love you. Do I not have the right to be with you?”
“I’m afraid not. And that means—well, my first concern has to be keeping you safe.”
“And you. It will not be safe for you to be found with me.”
“I don’t give a hang about that. What worries me is the chance of you getting returned to Dr. Landry—forced back into that old life once she rebuilds the Palace. A slave again.”
Lily said nothing. She felt him draw a breath, a deep one. His hand cradled her cheek.
“Listen to me, Lily.”
“I always listen to you, Rey.”
“Good. Because I did a lot of thinking while I was in jail, an awful lot. I’m glad you met the Kellys and they can help you with all your needs. Maybe it’s a good thing Kelly’s a cop—he may be able to keep tabs on what’s going on with Dr. Landry. Between him and Topaz Gideon, you’ll be taken care of.”
“You will take care of me.”
“No, Lily. No.”
“But I want to be with you.”
“You said you’d listen.”
“Yes, Rey.”
“I’m no good for you, Lily. I realized that, inside. What do I have to offer you? Sasha’s right about me: I’m a loser, a laugh. I’ve nothing to brag about but a job pushing corpses around the city, if I still have that. A shabby room and no money. Sure, I was a stop-gap measure for you, and I’ve loved every minute we spent together. But it has to be over now.”
“Over?” For an instant Lily’s intelligence, incapable of processing the word, stuttered. She froze where she lay beneath him.
“Look,” he hurried on, “I can’t do anything to help you. I can only harm you. Stay with Mrs. Gideon and pretend to be human. Let the Kellys assist you and get you free of Dr. Landry. Become all you wish to be.”
“I wish to be your wife.”
“Lily—darling—that’s impossible.”
“It is not. Rose is Pat’s wife, and they are like us.”
“Not impossible for that reason but because of who I am.”
“But I love you.”
“You only think you love me because I’m the first man you latched onto. You had no—no information to tell you what a lousy choice you made.”
“Lousy?”
“Bad. Mistaken.”
“You’re the one who is mistaken, Rey.”
“Lily, no. There are thousands of better men out there, if you want to be with a human.”
“I want to be with you.” Again her intelligence faltered and kicked back in with a force that hurt. “Perhaps it is you who do not want to be with me because of what I am.”
She should have expected this. In jail, as he said, he’d had time to think. Now that the effects of Miss X’s adventures had worn off, he saw he wanted to be with a real woman, one who could give him warmth, children —something more than steel cloaked in flesh.
“No, it’s not that,” he said, but the words came slowly, too slowly to convince her. “I should never have taken a chance and brought you here. And I don’t think we should see each other again.”
What had he said? For an instant, Lily refused to assimilate the words; her intelligence whited out. It felt as if her shutoff switch had been tripped, even though she’d expected to experience only darkness in that event. Then she found herself still in the bed, Rey’s body still half covering hers, gazing up into the face she loved more than anything else in the world.
He did not want her. Her very reason for existing, gone. Her impetus for reading and learning and caring—gone. Her reason for moving through her days…
She might just as well be a machine.
She began to tremble, her body juddering violently, limbs quivering, water splashing in her thorax. Her eyes rolled and the bed rattled with the force of her convulsion.
With no further warning, the fire in her boiler winked out.
****
“Lily? Lily—Lily!”
Reynold first whispered and then shouted the words at the figure that lay beneath him. Her arms, so recently clenched tightly around his torso, had fallen away, limp. Her pale eyes gazed at the spotty ceiling. Worst of all, her mouth fell open, emitting a few tufts of dark-colored steam. More trickled from her ears and out from the corners of her eyes.
By God, what had he done?
Panic gripped him, thick, black, and smothering in its intensity, so for a moment he couldn’t breathe.
“Lily—Lily!”
He seized her chin and turned her head; it flopped on the pillow. Her eyes, now
turned to his, held nothing. Gone. All her innocence, all her silly humor, all her love.
Just—gone.
A cry tore through him, half strangled wail, half grunt of pain. He slid from the bed and stood staring.
What to do? How to bring her back again? He gathered her into his arms, realized they were both naked, and set her down. He rolled her onto her side and, with shaky fingers, sought the flap that concealed her shutoff switch, failing to locate it. He sucked in a breath and forced himself to try once more.
It wasn’t there. And she was dead.
Dead. And he might as well go away somewhere and off himself too. For he realized in that instant he couldn’t live without her—well, didn’t want to, though he supposed he could go on breathing, his heart might keep beating.
His heart.
She’d told him over and over again that it beat for both of them. But he’d gone and withdrawn it from her, and only look what had happened.
She’d died underneath him.
Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God.
His fingers at last found the concealed flap on the opposite side of her body and peeled it open. More steam came from it in a little whoosh. He found the button inside. Pushed it.
Nothing.
“Lily,” he choked. “Come on. Come back to me. Please!”
Push, push, push.
No response. Lily lay looking like a dead woman, apart from the flap open at her side and the faint haze of steam.
“What have I done?”
Stupid. He’d always been hopelessly stupid, and good intentions counted for nothing. Sasha was right about him. They were all right about him.
He lowered his head to Lily’s breast, fighting the blackness that swamped him. Stupid he might be, but he couldn’t just let her lie here. He had to do something.
Only one person might know how to help her—one he could go to, anyway.
He dressed himself with shaking hands and shoved Lily into her clothing as best he could. Then, with her caught high in his arms, up against his heart, he went out into the night.
****
Rose Kelly answered Reynold’s frantic pounding on the door and let him in, a look of horror on her face.
“What’s happened?”
Steel Kisses Page 18