by Wendy Smith
It breaks my heart thinking someone could hurt my best friend like this. Is this how a best friend’s supposed to feel, or am I feeling more? I love Brooke, but am I in love with her?
I drive to Brooke’s house. She needs me. Running from my car, I hammer on her door. Brooke’s mother opens it.
“Cole?”
“Is Brooke home?”
“Brooke’s at the prom.” She slurs her words. Clearly she’s been drinking already.
“She’s not here?”
“She left a while ago. I don’t know if I like the boy she went with. She got a cab. He should have picked her up.”
I nod. “Yeah, he should have. Have a good night, Mrs. Stevens.”
She smiles. “It’s a shame you two didn’t go together. You’d make such a lovely couple.”
As if I don’t already regret taking Brooke up on her offer. You could have asked her instead of Kelly, you idiot.
The truth is that it never occurred to me. I spend a lot of time with Brooke, and we usually confide in each other. She didn’t tell me anything about Fleming other than he’d asked her to the prom.
For a moment, I sit in my car and rack my brain for any idea of where Brooke might be. Somewhere far enough to need a cab.
Maybe she’s not that far at all.
Apart from my house, her favorite place in the world is the beach. The wind is chilly, and if that’s where she’s gone I hope she’s somewhere where she’s not too cold.
I drive to the beach. There’s no one around, and I breathe a sigh of relief when I spot her.
She’s in her prom dress sitting on a rock, looking out to sea. Her blond hair’s piled on her head and set in place with some glittery hairpiece.
I’ve never seen her look so beautiful.
My chest twinges. Do I … do I have feelings for Brooke?
“Brooke,” I call.
She looks up as I run toward her, her eyes a brilliant blue brought out by her royal blue gown.
“What are you doing here?” she asks.
“Looking for you. It’s freezing.”
She shrugs. “I like the fresh air.” She drops her gaze. “How did you find me?”
“I know it’s your favorite place.” I smile. “There’s a lot I know about you.”
Slipping off the rock, she stands before me. “You know more about me than anyone. And I’ll ask you again, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at prom with Kelly?”
“I got thrown out.”
Her eyes widen. “Why?”
“Punching Fleming.”
Brooke’s mouth falls open.
“Why didn’t you tell me how he treated you? He’s a pig.”
She looks down at her feet. “You don’t need to hear my problems.”
“That’s what best friends are for.”
When she looks back up at me, her eyes are full of tears. “I didn’t want to screw up your night. You should be able to go and enjoy it without worrying about me.”
I grasp her chin, locking in her gaze so she can’t pull away again. “Of course I worry about you. I wanted to do more than punch Fleming. I wanted to smack the shit out of him for the way he acted toward you.”
“It’s the way they always act toward me, Cole. Like they’re better than me. At least next year they’ll all be off to college and not around here anymore.”
My skin prickles. “But you’re going to college. You got a scholarship last semester.”
She shakes free of my grasp. “I can’t make it work. No matter what I do. It doesn’t cover all my expenses and even if I get a part-time job, it’ll just be too much.”
“Shit.” I lick my lips. “Maybe I can ask my dad to help.”
“Cole, I’m not stupid. Your father hates me.”
“He doesn’t hate you.”
“Well, he doesn’t like me. And I know why. He thinks I’m like my mom.”
“Has he said that to you?” Bastard.
She shakes her head. “I can see it in his face when he looks at me. I can’t blame him. He blames Mom for the loss of his best friend.”
“How do you know that?”
“She tells me stories when she’s drunk. About how, despite their differences, my dad was close with your dad.” Brooke looks at me from under her lashes. “Friends like we are.”
She shivers.
I slip my jacket from my shoulders and place it over hers. She looks up at me. “Thanks. Aren’t you cold?”
I shrug. “I’ll survive. What are you doing out here?”
“It seemed like a good place to spend the evening. It’s quiet.”
“No one to see you.”
She fixes her gaze on me and nods. “I can’t let my mother know she spent all this money on a dress just for me to not go.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you weren’t going? I thought you were.”
Brooke looks at her feet. “I was. But then it became clear that Fleming had … expectations.”
I nod. “I know. He told me he ditched you because you wouldn’t put out.”
Her mouth drops open as she stares at me. “He didn’t.”
“He had Gina on his arm tonight.”
She sighs. “He told me he’d booked a motel room for us. I freaked out. I’ve never dated the guy. Why would I sleep with him?”
“Prom tradition, apparently.” I slip my arm around her shoulders. “If you don’t want to face your mom, come back to my house for a while.”
“You know I can’t.”
“I’ll sneak you into my room. Like we used to when we were kids.”
She laughs. “We haven’t done that in a long time.”
“Tonight seems to be a night to break all the rules. What’s another one?”
My room is right at the end of the house, and the balcony extends all the way. I’m thankful there’s no window for Brooke to try and scramble through in that gown of hers. She can walk right in the sliding door, once I open it.
I push open the back door and walk through the kitchen and into the living room. Mom and Dad sit watching television, and Dad looks up at me in surprise. “What happened to your prom? Did you lose your jacket?”
“I got kicked out for punching Fleming Reid.”
“Oh, Cole.” Mom’s eyes are so sad.
“What the hell, Cole? Why would you do that?” Dad says.
“He’s a douche.”
“What about your date?” Mom asks.
“I gave her money to get a taxi home. She wanted to stay.”
“At least you did that. How disappointing.” Dad gives me such a look of disdain that all the anger I felt before comes flooding back.
“Fleming was supposed to take Brooke. He dumped her for another girl because Brooke wouldn’t sleep with him.”
Mom’s mouth falls open. “Poor Brooke.”
“I wasn’t about to let him treat my best friend like that. Brooke wanted to go so badly, and her mom …” My voice cracks. “Her mom paid for a dress she won’t get to use. It’s so unfair.”
Dad nods. “That is unfair. Do you want me to speak to Fleming’s father?”
I raise my eyebrows. Dad agreeing with me is the last thing I thought would happen. We butt heads a lot, but even he can see why I’m angry about this.
“I’m not sure if there’s much point. You can do if you want to. I’m not sure how receptive he’ll be, given I punched Fleming in the face.”
The corners of Dad’s mouth curl into a smile. “I’m glad you stood up for her. Especially if no one else was going to.”
Mom pats Dad’s arm, smiling at him.
“I’m going to go and watch a movie in my room. What a fucked up night.”
“Cole,” Mom snaps.
I laugh. “Sorry.” I walk over to her, and press a kiss to her forehead while she cups my cheek.
“I’m so proud of you.”
“Goodnight, Mom. Dad.”
“Goodnight,” Dad says.
I make my way to my room, tugging
at my tie.
Brooke stands on the deck. Despite my jacket, she shivers, and after locking my door, I walk toward the deck. Unlocking it, I slide that door open and she slips in.
“You okay?” I ask.
“Just cold.”
“It’s warm in here. Is your mother going to notice if you’re gone for the night?”
Her eyes widen.
“I’ll take you home if you want. But if you stay, you can take the bed. I’ll sleep on the floor.”
She nods, dropping my jacket from her shoulders and handing it to me.
“I’m proud of you, you know?”
She laughs as she sits on the bed. “Why?”
“For not just letting Fleming have what he wants.”
She grimaces. “I like him, but not enough to end up in a motel room with him. Besides, I’ve heard stories of his conquests. Why would I want stories spread about me?”
I throw my jacket over the back of my computer chair. “He’s a prick. He’d talked about girls, but I didn’t think he’d be like that with you.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t want my first time to be with someone who thinks it’ll be fun to tell the world.”
My breathing quickens. Brooke and I have talked about everything in our lives, except sex. It was always an unspoken promise between us not to. But this doesn’t feel uncomfortable.
“I always thought you had been with Justin. You dated him for six months.”
She stares at me as if I’ve just sworn. “No. I mean, he wanted to, but I couldn’t. Not with him.”
“He worshipped the ground you walked on, B.”
“I always thought it’d be you.” She says it so quietly, I almost miss it. What?
“Thought it would be me?”
She stands. For a moment, we stare at each other.
“Brooke,” I say softly.
Her expression tightens as she swallows, and she blinks a bunch of times as if she’s fighting tears. “It’s stupid. I know. Maybe I should go home.”
My heart’s in my throat. Maybe home is the right place for her to be, but I’ve got a yearning I’ve never had before and that’s to hold her in my arms and never let her go.
I cross the room and palm her cheek. “I never knew you felt that way.”
“Forget what I said.” She pulls away.
“How can I?”
I don’t want you to go.
My heart’s just woken up.
I love you.
“I need to go home.” She sucks in her top lip. “I’ll call for a taxi. Stay here and enjoy your night.”
She takes a step toward the sliding door.
“Don’t go,” I say.
“I’ve made enough of an idiot of myself tonight.” She licks her lips and takes another step toward her escape route.
“Stay here with me.” I step closer.
She does that rapid blinking thing again. “Cole, I feel stupid. Mom’s probably asleep by now anyway.”
“I’m not thinking about your mother.” Her blue eyes widen as I stroke her cheek. Tears well in her eyes. “I’ve been so blind, Brooke. You’ve been right in front of me all along. I love you.”
She licks her lips as tears escape her eyes and roll down her cheeks. “Not in that way.”
“Maybe I do. Maybe I just didn’t realize it.” I sigh. “There was no way I was staying at the prom once I knew what had happened to you. All I wanted was to find you and make sure you were okay. Because I care about you. As more than just a friend.”
“Cole Masters, if you’re saying this to get laid …”
I shake my head. “I just want to kiss you.”
Her chest rises sharply as she takes a deep breath. “You’re not obligated to make me feel better about tonight.”
“If you think this is about obligation, you’re crazy.”
She swallows so hard I see the movement in her throat. “Cole,” she says softly.
Her face is so close to mine, and I study her features for a moment. I always knew she was pretty. God knows when we were kids, we were teased about being boyfriend and girlfriend, but we were only ever friends.
At least, that was what I thought.
Maybe it was always meant to be something more.
She nods, and I gently press my mouth to hers. Her lips are soft, and there’s a hint of grape from her gloss.
When she parts her lips, I slip my tongue in and caress hers. There’s the tiniest of gasps that comes from her throat.
“All this time and you were right there.” Emotion overwhelms me.
“I thought you’d never see me.”
“All I see is you.” I kiss her again before leaning my forehead on hers. “Stay?”
“Okay.”
5
Cole
Present day
* * *
She’s pregnant.
It doesn’t change anything when it comes to my feelings about Brooke, but it does increase my need to unite our family.
I’m haunted by memories. Since Brooke’s memory loss, I’ve been reliving pivotal moments of our lives.
Brooke showing me her feelings.
The night Kaia was conceived.
Things could have been so different for us. If I’d stayed, Brooke wouldn’t have had her accident, and maybe if I’d held things together, we’d be happily married instead of in this big mess that exists now.
And now we have two children involved.
I lie awake in bed and think about Brooke and Kaia. We were a family for a short time again, and this time I can’t see my way back to them.
Maybe I won Brooke over before, but with the added issues around her memory loss, she’s doubled down on not trusting me. I understand it, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less.
My little girl laughing with delight when she laid eyes on her room.
I get out of bed and walk down the hallway to Kaia’s room. It was too painful to look at, and I shut the door on it weeks ago. Now, I open the door and walk in.
Flicking the button that lights the room with projected stars, I pick up the stickers I bought to decorate. Our movie night inspired me, and I have a huge selection of Pixar characters ready to stick on the wall.
I wanted to do this with Kaia.
It’s a little after two in the morning as I open the first one and place it in the center of the wall. It’s Dory. Kaia wanted to watch Finding Nemo twice after Brooke left for work. I had promised her we’d watch it again. We never got to do that.
One by one, the stickers go up until I’ve covered the wall. There’s something for every movie we watched and some that are a promise of ones we haven’t seen together.
We’ll watch them together, Kaia. Maybe with your new baby brother or sister.
The sun is rising when I finish, the early morning rays peeping through the curtains. I’m no closer to finding a way to make Brooke trust me, but the wall is finished and ready for Kaia to see.
Now to shower and start getting ready for work.
I can barely keep my eyes open.
“Are we keeping you awake?” Mike stands in the doorway to my office. Everyone at work knows about the situation with Brooke, and they’ve been caring and understanding. It leaves me wondering how Brooke is doing with that bitchy boss. Is she being treated fairly too?
“I was up half the night decorating Kaia’s room.”
Mike smiles. “You should do that on the weekends, Cole. Then you wouldn’t be struggling to stay awake at your desk.”
“Inspiration struck. Besides, I got some news yesterday that left me not able to sleep.”
“Is that why Brooke was here?”
I nod. Mike’s been my friend and confidante for a year, and I need someone to talk to. “She’s pregnant.”
For a moment, he just blinks. “Wow. Who’s the father?”
I glare at him. “Me. It must have happened right before the attack.”
“Well, you two were at it like bunnies.”
I
laugh. “Not that you were ever told that.”
He shrugs. “Come on. She’s gorgeous, and you’re a red-blooded male. You’d have to be crazy not to want to have a lot of sex with her.”
“Can you please stop talking about my wife like that?” I laugh.
“At least you’re smiling.”
I lean back in my chair. “It’s not easy. I just miss them so much.”
“I told you before and I’ll tell you again: patience. Pushing her is only going to backfire on you. She needs time.”
“You’ve turned into a real counselor.”
He smiles. “I just want to see you happy again. And not falling asleep at your desk.”
I laugh. “I promise I’ll get an early night tonight.”
“Good luck.”
I sigh as he leaves my office.
I’m going to need all the luck I can get.
6
Brooke
I’m so glad I’m only working five nights a week and not six. I want to spend more time with Kaia, and I’m going to need all the rest I can get in the coming weeks.
My morning sickness with Kaia was awful. I don’t know if it helped our marriage that Cole would sometimes hold my hair while I puked. He tried to be sweet, but that was pretty gross.
It’s Sunday afternoon, and I’m so tired I’m almost asleep on the couch. I haven’t heard from Cole, but I haven’t reached out to him either since the other day. I’m still not sure what to think. He’s saying all the right things, and I’m leaning toward trusting him. I did let him get close enough to impregnate me again, after all.
“Mommy, look.” Kaia grins up at me from the floor. She’s been playing with her building blocks and used them all to make a big tower that’s about to topple over.
I laugh. “It’s nearly as tall as you.”
She grins.
My heart leaps at the knock on the door, and I push myself off the couch.
“Who is it?” I ask as I approach.
“Jensen Masters.”
I fist my hands without thinking about it. Never in a million years did I think Cole’s father would be on my doorstep. But then again, he and Cole’s mother were wonderful when I was in hospital.